These might sound familiar, but Pensitivity101 wants to know how would you explain them?

1. What is Free Will?
   
   That’s where I receive the entire inheritance, because the court can’t locate my dodgy brother. Could be Witness Protection…. Could be avoiding angry husbands….  Could be identity theft.

2. What is persona non grata?

If you receive an invitation to a wedding and reception, unless it is addressed to Mr. & Mrs. Schlemiel, or Mr. Schlemiel +1, do not bring along your current blow-jobber  bed-warmer!  He/she/it/they are not included in the seating plan.

3. What is bog standard?

That is the British equivalent to the American, ‘close enough for Government work.’  Also, to the Engineers motto – Force To Fit – File To Hide – Paint To Cover.

4. What is builder’s tea?

That’s the 10 AM break at the construction site for a hot cuppa.

5. What is a couch potato?

Sadly, any one of far too many members of the current Electronic Generation.  They are evolving to have light blue skin because they get their tans from the screens of half a dozen glowing devices.  Soon, they will be known as mouse potatoes – or guinea pig-potatoes, for those whose little peripheral is wireless.

6. What is a finger in every pie?

The little math nerd from Accounts Receivable, who we don’t even invite to the weekly office meeting, but who shows up anyway, like a Dominos delivery driver, with a dozen charts that look like pizzas.
Bar graphs, Rolanda!!  Bar graphs!!  They’re much easier to read and understand.

7. What is meant by nip in the bud?

‘Nip in the bud??!’  I thought it was ‘Nip in the Butt!’  No wonder I got fired for sexual harassment – and I had just learned that harass was one word.

8. What is to pitch in?

That’s a cricket term which means that a large portion of the viewers have stopped watching the game, and moved on to something far more exciting…. Like watching the grass grow.

9. What is rule of thumb?

That is how the wife micromanages, and runs my life.  She used to just have me under her little finger…. But then I gained weight.  😮

10. What is to steal someone’s thunder?

That is the culmination of a game played by ten-year-old boys of all ages, involving passing gas.  The winner is not the loudest, or the longest – but the one who can clear the room, or at least have the rest coughing and waving.  Extra points if the drapes change colour.