TMNT

All posts tagged TMNT

TMNT’s: The Cowabunga “Recollection”.

Posted by Karl Weller on March 17, 2022
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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was such a staple of my childhood growing up. The action figures. The T-shirt’s. Cereal bowls. Wallpaper. And of course the games. They were all permanent fixtures in the home, much to my mother’s chagrin. When I wasn’t fending off the foot clan, preventing Bebop and Rocksteady from invading my sewer lair play-set, with the assistance of the turtle blimp and van. Which as it turned out was always a ploy, orchestrated by Shredder to distract the Turtles. Allowing Shredder unrestricted access to our hideout, as well as our mentor Splinter. I had a very active imagination as a child. We all imagined scenarios in which we’d overcome their villainous, often elaborate schemes, with gaming being just another extension of that. So it’s rather auspicious timing that a series so prevalent in my formative years, has been renovated at a time when – having just celebrated my 35th birthday – I couldn’t feel older. TMNT’s is a celebrated representative in the now redundant side scrolling beat-em-up genre, finally returned in two separate titles.

“Shredders Revenge”, a new TMNT’s game inspired by those childhood defining beat-em-ups was announced last year. With a tentative 2022 release. Now Konami, the Josef Fritzl of franchise gate-keeping, have decided to double down on that Turtle’s nostalgia with the “Cowabunga Collection”. A selection of classic, “I member!” titles that return to those long lost, halcyon day’s of adolescence. Featuring 13 classic games from 5 divergent devices, including the Arcade. Notable additions include all 3 variants of “Tournament Fighters”. “TMNT’s: Fall Of The Footclan”, a game that’s level design was so ingrained in my memory, that not only could I negotiate each stage with such confidence, that I’d barely sustain any damage. But that the final confrontation with Krang was so predictable, I could intentionally lose as Leonardo, Raphael and Michelangelo, just so Donatello would be the one to save the day. And “TMNT’s 2: The Arcade Game” for the NES. A game so inherently linked to my infancy, that it’s difficult to remember a time before it. It also represents a rare moment of civility between my father and myself, to become an anarchic fighting team. Predisposed to foiling the ludicrous villainy of Shredder, footclan and the veritable menagerie of mutated consorts. Hopefully an experience I can replicate with my own daughter. Playing the game I mean, not me becoming a lying, adulterous fuck nugget.

With both “Shredders Revenge” and the “Cowabunga Collection” slated for a provisional release this year, 2022 could be a triumph return for a series that never should have left.

Retro Style Arcade Turtles Game Revisited In “TMNT: Shredders Revenge”.

Posted by Karl Weller on March 11, 2021
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Nothing invokes childhood nostalgia quite like the “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”. These four subterranean reptiles and their insatiable appetite for Italian cuisine, were the paternal influences of my formative years. Their weekly conflicts with “Shredder” and his criminal disciples the “Footclan” were stimulating imagery, eagerly imitated by me in my back garden. Wielding my mother’s washing line prop pole as a substitute bo staff, attaching a plastic shell from my old turtle potty, strapped to my back using the luxury bath robe belt, I bravely defended the innocent citizens of my garden from the encroaching malevolence of Krang. Before indulging the compulsory swoons of an emphatically grateful April O Neil. An implied cross-species relationship my feeble mind was too young to comprehend.

When I wasn’t protecting the imagined denizens of my back garden from the swathes of evil-doers, I was living the life of a Ninja Turtle vicariously through the arcade games. My Dad and I teaming up in a now sadly rationed moment of patriarchal solidarity. But now, thanks to developer “Tribute Games”, I can regain some of that fading youth with “TMNT: Shredders Revenge”. A 4 player online/offline? Arcade beat-em-up, inspired by the classic 90’s era games I exclusively devoted my life too.

Though still in early development, with details concerning release date or indeed platforms sparse, I can exclusively reveal that Shredders Revenge is going to be radical! Seriously, this is the Turtles sequel I’ve been waiting over 2 decades for! Hopefully this can be the catalyst that can impart the same nostalgic sentiments to my daughter, that I felt when teaming up with my father to play these games.

What do you guys think? Will you be playing “Shredders Revenge”? And most importantly, who was your favourite Ninja (Hero for us in the UK) Turtle? For me it was always Donatello. Let me know in the comments below. Cowabunga!

My Top 10 Most Influential Games: #9 “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II The Arcade Game.”

Posted by Karl Weller on December 13, 2017
Posted in: Top 10 Most Influential. Tagged: , , , , , , , . 2 Comments

Growing up there were only ever 3 careers I wanted to pursue: being Spider-Man, becoming a Ghostbuster or altering my own DNA to become an anthropomorphic turtle with my own renaissance artist inspired name and join the “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”. It wasn’t until years later that a careers adviser assured me that these were not in fact legitimate means of employment. Way to crush my dreams madam. Referred to as “Hero Turtles” here in the UK due to the prohibition of the word “Ninja”, which censors deemed an inappropriate terminology, owing to the inflammatory hostility associated with the connotation, they were my idles. Whatever you want to call these conglomerate of teenage reptiles, their boisterous nature, penchant for Italian cuisine and memorable charades against the fiendish “Turtle Soup” loving Shredder and his hapless cohorts “Bebop and Rocksteady” were captivating. And even to this day I can still recite the theme song with rhythmic precision despite decades worth of absence.

Every Saturday morning I would tune in to watch their next scintillating escapades, trying to emulate my hero “Donatello”, by fastening my own cartilaginous shell to my back, fashioned from a turtle shaped potty lid I had and wielding my mother’s mop as a substitute bow staff. I even tried to apply to become a fifth companion by submitting a crudely written letter, sealed in a plastic pocket sheet and deposited in the nearest drain believing that the network of aqueducts would somehow deliver my message to master Splinter. Alas I did not receive an invitation for recruitment, as it was probably intercepted by the Rat king, but that didn’t deter me from accumulating a retinue of expensive merchandise. T-shirts, hats, lunch boxes and toys, so many toys. The Turtle van, Turtle Blimp and my most prized possession, the Turtle Sewer lair. But it was “TMNT II The Arcade Game” that I remember with the most affection.

Egregiously undermined as merely a “Double Dragon” imitator, TMNT’s II was a frenetic side scrolling beat ’em up that I’d literally play for hours, mother permitting of course. Battling your way through the altering environments and swarms of colour specific foot soldiers, that indicated their preferred weapon choices felt like being in the television show! You derive a great deal of satisfaction from clobbering numerous interchangeable aggressors with fervent aggression, abusing the “A” button with furious intensity. You had destructible environments, lampposts that could be used as projectiles, trash cans that concealed nourishing life-sustaining pizza and a boss to conclude each level. Not to mention the innovative simultaneous 4 player Co op introduced in later iterations that enabled me and my friends to assume the roles of our favourite Turtles. It may not have the depth or cultural status as many others on this list, but it’s simplicity was undeniably compelling. But what was most evocative about this game is the memories it conjures up from being a kid, namely my relationship with my father.

This game harks back to a time when the most prominent father figure in my life was my dad. We’d play TMNT II for what seemed like hours, but may only have been minutes. He’d play as Leonardo and I of course was Donny. Together we’d eliminate anything stupid enough to inhibit our progression, providing each other with refuge and facilitate the restorative properties of pizza to whoever needed most. We functioned as an efficient if competitive unit, with my dad boasting a greater ratio of kills to me. And though my father and I have drifted apart over the years it’s comforting to reflect on a time in my life when we were close. Not just as father and son but as friends too. And that’s why “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II The Arcade Game” is my #9.

#8. Tales Of Symphonia.

#10. DMC3.

Being A 30 Year Old Man Child.

Posted by Karl Weller on March 15, 2017
Posted in: Feature. Tagged: , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

Well that’s it. The fleeting time we’ve had together has been a memorable, intertwined collusion steeped in the resonating fragility of youthful exuberance, frivolity and the brazen exploitation of vitality. You have bestowed so much distinguished virility to me that I can assure you has been reciprocated with the utmost pleasure and respect. But as our trajectories shift, so too must we. And as we part to pursue our own separate ventures know that there will always be a special place reserved in my heart for your eternally vigilant restrictions that has invariably shaped my life. You will be missed. Farewell my 20’s. May flights of angels send you hurtling towards the next unsuspecting teen who – I’m sure will abuse your power with the same earnest convictions and wasteful extravagance that had enabled me to be perpetually inebriated without fear of morning repercussions. Neglectful of the value of money (as well as saving some of it) and oblivious to the fact that life will never again be so ripe with opportunities. Yes as you can probably tell by the melancholic introduction I can no longer be considered a man in my 20’s, a label I’d been desperately clinging too like Mel Gibson grasp on reality. It’s fair to say that I hadn’t been anticipating this event with anything other than irrational fear, vacillating between vitriol and anxious restraint. Nobody enjoys getting older but it’s something you endure because you have no choice, even if at times it feels excruciatingly tedious.

“This place had the best Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle themed pizza’s!”

I can tell you now with only 3 days experience of being 30 *shudders* that it’s a lot like being in your 20’s, just older. Sorry, I mean refined. It’s a perplexing age, neither old nor young. You’re young enough to know popular culture but a little too old to really understand it. When you reach such a milestone you find that expectations you had in your 20’s have completely changed. I began this blog when I was 24, commissioned more out of boredom than anything. But I completely expected to be an established, well renowned blogger by now, receiving commendations from my prestigious contemporaries. But that’s the kind of audacious fantasies you believe when you’re in your 20’s, treating the slow expanse of time as an almost limitless tool. However that optimism and insatiable zest for life diminishes as you become more observant to the ills this world affords. Cynicism becomes an increasingly fervent response to the protestations of day-to-day activities. You have news programmes and publications that report death with such labouring attention but present nothing of it with any distinctive concern. Whereas anything good or righteous is conveyed with deft economy, ordinarily reserved for some marginal segment at the end or page 85. When you’re presented with a world so absent of humanity it’s easy to see the bad, yet highlights what you should really appreciate at any age.

“Beer and gaming? Why didn’t I think of that?!”

My girlfriend had planned the “celebrations” for my 30th which involved a mini pub crawl around gaming bars across London. With a select group in tow we quenched our thirsts and chortled through them, with a brief triumphant interlude of playing Mario Kart 64 and other nostalgic inducing arcade games as well as TMNT themed pizza’s, until we exerted all of our squandered consciousness and collapsed exhausted on the train journey home. And it was fun, despite receiving a mug with the statement proclaiming that “30. It’s all down hill from here”. Just what I need; visual aids to remind me just how old I’ve become, despite TMNT socks that refute my supposed maturity. And it’s here, surrounded by friends that you realise that you’re not just a games enthusiast, but a 30-year-old games enthusiast with a girlfriend, daughter and a mortgage I’ll never fully pay off. You start to reminisce about the friends you had 10 years ago and realise that none were present and you haven’t spoken in nearly 8 years. That my advancing age is validated by the strands of greying hair that have betrayed my scalp. That my body is slowly degenerating and the brief glimpses of senility are becoming more pronounced. Feeling sorry for me yet? Yet it’s funny just how little I’ve aged mentally.
I don’t feel any different now than I did when I was 18. Not a bit. I’d still rather be isolated in a dimly lit room bathed in the iridescent glow of my HD TV, slightly inebriated, coated in the stray remains of some salted snack and cradling my PlayStation controller as I battle some imminent combatant. The only difference now is that I’m old enough to know better. And I do, I just choice to ignore it. I maybe 30 but that shouldn’t precipitate for one second that I’m mature. Not a bit.

Do you feel like you’ve ever grown up? Let me know in the comments below. Cheers.

#TalkingNonsense

Posted by Karl Weller on July 30, 2014
Posted in: Feature. Tagged: , , , , , . Leave a comment

Screenshot 2014-07-30 at 20.43.02I had never passively consented to the invasive accentuation of social media. Its diverting procession of communal narration was just something I didn’t immediately gravitate to. Its was a proclivity that alluded me, one I deemed an obtrusive malady, advocated by the excessive digressions of individuals that are fluently literate with this form of informal congress. Posting pictures of their groomed dog, imparting worthless appraisals or detailing events with intricate detail despite myself being formally privy to the alluded events personally; it all seemed trivial. And though this site is officially registered on Facebook, I seldom frequent it choosing to idly mitigate its presence with dubious scrutiny. Now though much of my day is exhausted with an inclined head and my mobile phone radiating with accelerated incandescence, as the affliction to profuse divisive insertions besieges me to extend similar domesticated courtesies to someone I’ll never meet, or simply looming over the numerous exchanges and prudent spontaneity of respondents disputing which hirsute character is more attractive; Yogi bear or boo boo. It’s these suitably provisioned types of aberrant conversations that take place through the medium of restricted automated messages, that dispel adverse connotations attributed to Twitter. It may sound obtuse to indulge in such nonchalant discussions when the world is constantly afflicted by it own extenuating grievances, but it’s precisely because of societies laden infirmity that we become attracted by trends and hash-tags that promote apathy and blessed ignorance.

"Another Simpsons reference. Simply because I remember when it was funny!"

“Another Simpsons reference. Simply because I remember when it was funny!”

You can be a geek on Twitter and no one furrows a metaphorical brow or grimaces with pronounced ridicule at your ponderous acclamations. You can discover partisans of similar lineage, as well as a retinue vivacious arguments with often divisive aspirations. But it’s also a commutative network where your collated thoughts and off the cuff remarks are distributed to a broadened residency, that can appreciate conjectures that personal in your immediate vicinity may not be as obliged to remark upon, with anything other than mild civility. You form allegiances, develop figurative partitions against the more odious of residence, without feeling perturbed by the expressive provenance embedded in any derogatory retaliations. Though derision for personal admissions is apparent, and I fail to confer that it is in any way a product of deliberate anecdotal virulence, much of it is offset by the amiable discharge of luminance and reciprocal affiliation with a correspondent half the world away. It’s these comforting exchanges validates that my innate, slightly neurotic musings aren’t as anomalous as I’d presumed, and people generally want to discuss the most arbitrary topics. Many of the conversations I’ve had are composed of conjectured sophistry ranging from someone discussing their newly furnished bedroom, to why Donatello is the best TMNT; you can openly relish in the resplendence of culturally insignificant profusion’s.

"Donatello is and was always the best!"

“Donatello was and is the best!”

You may share similar monogamous affinity with other numerable retinues that offer comparable placation. But for me Twitter is my sanctity from the truculent rigidity of reality, a residence for reciting specific passages from classic Simpsons episodes, the latitude for extending humble condolences to an ethereal community, mourning the passing of a great cultural icon and gauging on the veritable consignment of gaming news. If someone had told me a decade ago that the reputed art of conversation would be governed by the handheld apparatus that links to other devices with perfect synchronicity, repressed by captions consisting of no more than 140 characters with an abundance of hash-tags, demonic looking kittens and Batman Memes I would have said “Who are you and how did you get in my bathroom?!” And then proclaiming “Your mad Sir (or madam), madder than an escaped mental patient trying to buy a Big Mac from Burger King while using beanie babies as currency!…..Just mad!

How does social media effect you? Good or Bad.