Cartoon used by permission: 290067_The Trump Circus is Back In Town by Rick McKee, CagleCartoons.com
WTF AMERICA! Looks like the majority of you decided to burn it all to the ground!
Looks like you said: “Screw you” to your better angels! Let’s elect a fascist, a serial abuser, a morally corrupt being, an inept leader, a narcissist, a consummate liar, an accused rapist, a felon, a horrifically cruel wannabe dictator to be our President (at least it won’t be a woman of color married to a Jewish man)—Woo-hoo!”
Cartoon used by permission for promotion of blog: 290018_The Christian Nation Myth by Pat Byrnes PoliticalCartoons.com
WHAT WON? (1) Project 2025 and the oversight of “Christian Nationalist Evangelicals” who want to rule every aspect of our lives and give us all but one choice: their way or the highway. (2) Cruelty. (3) Sexism. (4) Racism. (5) Ignorance. (6) Lies. (7) Incompetence. (8) Chronic dysfunction. (9) Horrors yet to be determined…
Cartoon used by permission for promotion of blog: 290056_Uncle Sam Fetal Position by Ed Wexler, CagleCartoons.com
WHAT LOST? (1) The Common Good. (2) Freedom. (3) Real Christian values (poor Jesus). (4) Equality (5) Brotherly love. (6) Compassion. (7) Care and repair for the Earth (8) Peace
I’m so sorry, World. I realize that when America sneezes, the rest of the world gets a cold. I really thought that most of my American peeps were so much better than this, you know. But I was wrong. This is really who we are. I’m afraid that there may be no coming back from this permanent stain—calling what is good bad and what is bad good. At least not for a couple of decades or so, but by then so much will be lost (sorry Ukraine, sorry Gaza, sorry Taiwan, sorry Africa, sorry NATO) or irreparably damaged (the Earth’s health).
Cartoon used by permission: 290027_This Won’t Wash Off by Pat Byrnes, PoliticalCartoons.com
WHAT AM I PERSONALLY GONNA DO ABOUT IT AT 76 YEARS OLD?Sit Shiva for America’s soul.
Shiva is a Jewish mourning ritual that involves a week-long period of gathering together to grieve, heal, and accept support from others who love you and can connect with your pain. During that week, I plan to consume the book Christ in Crisis (Why We Need to Reclaim Jesus) by Jim Wallis in the hope that it will bring me some healing and much needed guidance. After the week is up, I’m going to get up on my two feet, dry my tears, and go back into the trenches to continue to fight the good fight for the common good for my grandkids and the future generations in America until I die, because as Adam Kinzinger posted today: “This isn’t forever, and after America gets a taste of what it voted for, there will likely be a massive backlash.”
Cartoon used by permission: 290023_Trump as lady Liberty by Bart van Leeuwen, PoliticalCartoons.com
WHAT MY FELLOW AMERICANS SHOULD YOU DO IF YOU CARE? First of all, do not despair! “Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning!” (Psalm 30:5) Secondly, don’t give up. When the time is right, rise up out of your mourning sack-cloth-and-ashes garments, assess your talents of influence (whether it is in your own family, school board, church-synagogue-mosque, country club, work place, local government or beyond), and return to fight the good fight of truth, love, grace, and righteousness from the ground up. Start by keeping hope alive for a better world, in spite of the fact that America just lost its fucking mind. God is not dead! It ain’t over ‘til it’s over! The world is going to need us, and we owe it to our future generations to keep fighting this MAGA, Christian Nationalist, false White gospel, Project 2025, Trumpian cult madness with our very last breath.
Cartoon used by permission: 289990_The world is holding its breath by Patrick Chappatte, globecartoon.com
Eleanor Tomczyk is a memoirist and humorist blogger renowned for her engagingly funny musings as an ex-Evangelical Conservative Christian (emphasis on the “ex”) and African-American Baby Boomer. Embarking on a new career as a storyteller at 60, she draws on her experiences in White Conservative churches. Now in her mid-70s and a wife, mother, and grandmother, Tomczyk has authored books such as Monsters’ Throwdown, Fleeing Oz, The Fetus Chronicles: Podcasts to My Fetus-self, and House of Oz Undone: A Cautionary Tale. Her multifaceted career also spans roles as a singer, actress, motivational speaker, and award-winning voice-over artist.
Want to learn more about the author? Check out: eleanortomczyk.com
Blog published by Howthehelldidienduphere? Publications LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.
Busch Gardens Howl-O Scream||Photo credit: E. Tomczyk
3 P.M. HALLOWEEN AFTERNOON
Recently, I was listening to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” as inspiration for my Halloween costume for a party I was attending that night, while I doom-scrolled various headlines on the Internet:
“LA Archdiocese record payout ($800M) shows extent of Catholic church child sex abuse cover-up.”
“John Kelly says Trump praised Hitler, is the ‘definition of fascist’ and would like to be dictator.”
“If Trump Seems Crazy Now, Imagine Him Ruling America Again.”
“Invasion of the MAGA body snatchers: How many friends have you lost to madness?”
“70% of White Evangelicals Substitute the Gospel of Christ for a Failed Reality Host.”
“There’s People Who Are Absolutely Ready to Take on a Civil War”
And then it hit me like a brick to the head: It wasn’t just Halloween that was coming soon, but it was the Presidential election that was imminently upon us!
Right about that “boooing!” moment, one of my Facebook friends (a non-Christian) texted me a picture of his neighbor’s yard which was awash with political signs:
“Democrats are Communists and Terrorists—ARE YOU?”
“The Democratic Party HATES AMERICA—DO YOU?”
“If You Vote for the Whore—the Pea Brain—the Slut—Your Special Place in Hell is Guaranteed!”
“Trump, Trump, He’s God’s Man; If He Can’t Help Us, No One Can.”
My friend said that the irony of his neighbor’s horror-show, sign-reveal is that she is a professed Born-Again Christian and appeared to be religious to the core—never missing a Sunday service, Wednesday night Bible study or a church picnic, and never missing an opportunity to “preach the Gospel” to him. He had no idea if she knew his political standing, and although she had been tolerable as a neighbor, recently she seemed to have changed—turning into a witch in neighbor’s clothing. He said: “Hey, aren’t you still a Christian? Can you help me understand how people who preach about personally knowing the God of love can be so misguided and hateful? Do you think my neighbor could be demon possessed?” Under the picture of the nasty political signs my friend wrote the following caption: “If Trump wins, will it ever be safe to come out of my house?”
Cartoon used by permission: 289490_Witches Seek Trump Recipes for Putrefying Brains by Christopher Weyant, The Boston Globe, MA
Needless to say, I was instantly saddened for poor Jesus. I grabbed a bottle of wine to calm my nerves while ruminating on the one major thread the hostile political yard signs, plus the headlines I’d previously read, had in common. A horrible thought thundered through my head—like a specter stomping on my grave: they were all about the failure of so-called Christians to promote the common good. From priests and pastors who hid and protected child abusers for decades, while their victims languished and were destroyed, to White Evangelicals who lent their support to a convicted rapist and consummate liar charged with a total of 88 felony counts and found guilty of 34 of them.
On that note, I fell into a drunken stupor as I incessantly murmured the lyrics to the Prince of Egypt soundtrack to sooth my soul: “…Elohim, God on high, can you hear your people cry? Help us now—this dark hour, DELIVER US!”
Engraving of the Hammersmith Ghost in Kirby’s Wonderful and Scientific Museum, a magazine published in 1804 [common domain use]
I don’t know how long I had been asleep, but it was pitch black outside and apparently the electricity had gone out in my house, when the doorbell rang and woke me up. It was very dark outside with an unusually heavy fog hanging in the air. I didn’t see anyone as I stepped over the threshold onto the front porch to look around, but I felt an unshakeable chill as I backed inside my house and slammed the door shut and bolted it. As I searched for a flashlight on the mantle place, a nine-foot glowing specter dressed in a white shroud appeared behind me. His head was crowned with two horns and his face sported forty large glass eyes. The frightening form loomed over me causing a blood-curdling scream to escape from my being that I swear could be heard two states over.
“Shut the fuck up, woman,” said the specter with a British accent as he stifled my screams with one of his ice-cold hands. “Let me introduce myself before you wake the dead with your insane caterwauling. I am the ghost of Hammersmith—at your service.”
“Who? What? Wait a minute, I know about the history of the Hammersmith ghost,” I said in a quivering voice. “I’m no philistine. You’re an imposter. The Hammersmith ghost did not have forty glass eyes. Where did you come from?” I stammered.
“Well, technically from a churchyard in the 1800’s but literally from the cemetery just up the street. I heard you screaming, ‘Thriller bus! Thriller bus! And I need a thrilling Halloween costume toniiight!’ Or was that Michael Jackson (my favorite jam!) singing? As to the multiple glass eyes, it’s my Halloween touch—inspired by the King of Pop. I heard both you and MJ blasting from your cottage. I must say, I got a tad confused.” At which point the Hammersmith ghost broke into MJ’s Moonwalk as he screeched out a few lines of Michael Jackson’s Thriller:
‘And no one’s gonna save you from the beast about to strike
You know it’s thriller, thriller night
You’re fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight, yeah.’
“I was chillin’ behind one of the tombstones—bored out of my shroud, if truth be known—so I thought I’d drop in to see if your wish could be my command,” said a very pleased specter over his dance moves as he grabbed his crotch in a last-ditch effort to imitate MJ. “So, here I am: your ‘thriller bus’—here to take you on a costume run of your greatest fears!”
“Oh, for Halloween sake,” I said. “I was screaming ‘DELIVER US!’ to the God of the Universe because of the evil that is about to descend upon our country and the world if Donald Trump wins the upcoming Presidential election. I admit I was also screaming my frustration about not having a costume for the Halloween party tonight while dancing to MJ’s Thriller, but I did not conjure up you. Go back to Hell or wherever you came from!”
“Ooooh,” said the ghost. “My hearing really has been damaged since my transport from jolly ol’ England. Anyway, since I’m here, let’s go shopping. I’m soooooo bored. If you don’t like the costumes you see, I promise to return you without harm. At least we’ll both have an entertaining night. Deal?”
Before, I could utter a word, the Hammersmith ghost swooped me up in his arms like the Dickens’ Ghost of Christmas Future, and before I could blink, we were off to the graveyard up the street. When we landed, I noticed that the cemetery looked like a Halloween costume boutique showcasing Christian failures against the common good. Each tombstone featured a costume more horrific than the others, starting with the duplicity of Christian hypocrites who were rabid Trump supporters, but who had covered up the abuse of thousands of children through the years by their leadership—all the while lecturing other people about how they should live.
Cartoon used by permission: 289415_Christian Sex Scandals by Pat Bagley, The Salt Lake Tribune, UT
“Oh, Hell to the no!” I said.
“What’s the problem? It is my understanding from reading a myriad of history books on Halloween, that humans wear costumes about the evil they fear the most so as to defuse the horror.”
“Do you want me to vomit all over you?” I asked as I tried to find a way out of the graveyard.
“Okay,” replied the specter moving toward another tombstone. “How about a costume that is in the form of a giant book sporting the title: Project 2025. That seems to be a pretty tame costume to me. Plus, it has been crafted by your fellow peeps—the Born-Agains—the Christian Dominionists!”
Cartoon used by permission: 289499_Project 2025 scary by Dave Granlund, PoliticalCartoons.com
“NO, NO, NO!” I screamed. “This Project 2025 shit is no laughing matter. I can’t even wear this in jest. If this actually takes hold of us as a society, we might as well kiss our freedom goodbye. Take me back home before I have a heart attack and join you in your new graveyard digs.”
“Sheesh! You’re so picky,” grumbled the Hammersmith ghost. “Uh, uh, uh… look over there at that tombstone. There’s one that’s all about ‘love.’ Right up your alley. According to Mr. Trump, he has rebranded January 6th as a ‘day of love’ and not a day or chaos, murder, and mayhem. You get to wear a January 6th rioter costume while sporting a massive cross around your neck and carrying a sign that says ‘Jesus Saves’ with a headband that is embossed with the slogan ‘Feel the Love’ as you bash out the brains of anyone who stands in the way of Donald Trump taking over America’s White House. Surely, the irony of this costume should appeal to you.”
Cartoon used by permission: 289597_REPOST- VIOLENT MOB SCENE ON JAN. 6 by Bruce Plante, PoliticalCartoons.com
I stood before the Hammersmith ghost with my arms crossed in defiance and refused to concede.
“Oh man, this is no fun; I thought you Americans had a sense of humor which is why I moved here,” said the ghost who stomped his foot in protest. “Okay, one last attempt? How about going as FEAR in the guise of twin presidential campaigners—one representing ‘truth and decency’ and the other representing ‘lies and depravity.” You should win the costume prize if you show up at the party as Kamala Harris AND Donald Trump. I would say that is rather unique. It will add a bit of mystery to the night, don’t you think? A ‘will she or won’t he’ vibe. The madness and uncertainty of it all is simply delicious!”
Cartoon used by permission: 289473_Harris and Trump neck and neck by Taylor Jones, Mount Dora, FL
“NO, NO, NO: JESUS, DELIVER ME!” I screamed, which must have done the trick because I was suddenly transported back to my house which was ablaze in lights. It had been a horrific night, but I suddenly knew what costume I was going to wear to the party: A Black woman, a Black mother and grandmother, a Black citizen who loves our democracy, and a Black Christian who still “loves me some Jesus” would go to the costume party as a voter who planned to kick Trump’s ass to the curb and make the coming election a blowout for Kamala Harris. I was confident I would win the prize.
Cartoon used by permission: 289584_Kicking Trump Out Daydream repost by Daryl Cagle, CagleCartoons.com
DEAR READER: Hope you enjoyed my Halloween story. I’m actually going to my Halloween party as a cover of my new book House of Oz Undone (a cautionary tale). It is the reimagining of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz which envisions the horror of a society that is on the verge of electing the Wicked Witch of the West as leader of Oz and forever losing its freedom and humanity. You can check it out on Amazon or wherever books are sold.
CHECK OUT WHAT OTHERS HAVE TO SAY ABOUT “HOUSE OF OZ UNDONE” by Eleanor Tomczyk:
“House of Oz Undone is a brilliant venture through today’s societal themes. Setting out to find their home, heart, brain, and courage, a group of unlikely friends dissects the political and religious chaos they encounter traveling down the Yellow Brick Road. Funny, creative, and a little crazy, this book will have readers in hysterics.” —Kathryn Dare, San Francisco Book Review
“The incredible writing of the Divine Eleanor opens hearts and minds to the true loving inclusiveness of our God and dispels the thoughts of meanness, prejudice, and worship of money and power that seems to have taken hold of so many minds In our country today…..Thank goodness for those like this dear woman who not only see so clearly what is wrong here now, but also has the talent to use her creative writing to open eyes and ears to the truth….May God Bless her and the America she seeks to help return to sanity and love….Thank You….(You will love this book!).”—Amazon Review
Cartoon used by permission: 289573_MAGA Women Will Vote For Harris by Bob Englehart, PoliticalCartoons.com
Eleanor Tomczyk is a memoirist and humorist blogger renowned for her engagingly funny musings as an ex-Evangelical Conservative Christian (emphasis on the “ex”) and African-American Baby Boomer. Embarking on a new career as a storyteller at 60, she draws on her experiences in White Conservative churches. Now in her mid-70s and a wife, mother, and grandmother, Tomczyk has authored books such as Monsters’ Throwdown, Fleeing Oz, The Fetus Chronicles: Podcasts to My Fetus-self, and House of Oz Undone: A Cautionary Tale. Her multifaceted career also spans roles as a singer, actress, motivational speaker, and award-winning voice-over artist.
Blog published by Howthehelldidienduphere? Publications LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.
(Readers: even though I am no longer an Evangelical Conservative Christian, doesn’t mean I don’t still loves me some Jesus, and pray every day—sometimes all day long since Trump came on the scene!)
***
GOOD MOOORNNNING, LORD JESUS!
Thank you for this glorious day! I’ve been watching the Democratic National Convention all week, and I could have sworn I saw you in the audience groovin’ out to DJ Cassady’s perfectly curated roll call playlist! I could tell you were trying to keep a low profile, but the hope and joy exploding in the room was clearly a couple of your signature moves, and I know from experience that where there is hope and joy, you can’t be far off.
Anyway, the DNC is over and after walking on newfound clouds of hope and joy, I thought I’d invite you to go on a walk with me this morning for a few shout-outs of praise to you for such a glorious week and to tell you all about my worries for the future.
CARTOON USED BY PERMISSION: 287530_What’s wrong with their faces by John Darkow, Columbia Missourian
Lord Jesus, you know how I do. First, I walk 5,000 steps of my daily 10,000 step goal giving you shout-outs of praise for all the beautiful things I see in nature on the walking trail and all the blessings in my life. Then I take a load off my feet and rest a spell on a park bench dedicated to the dead wife of an old man that I’ll never know. However, I am warmed by the love he had for his lifetime partner as I rest on her park bench and gaze at the lovely magnolia tree that he planted in her honor.Then I start walking again for 2,500 steps—still overwhelmed with how much you answered my prayers during the Democratic National Convention this past week. As I start to dwell on the speeches (especially from some of Trump’s former employees and former Republicans) citing how—behind closed doors—Trump called his supporters “basement dwellers” and “disgusting people,” I saw the themes of my new book (House of Oz Undone) realized as the true character of Trump was exposed by those who once believed in him, and the scales finally fell from their eyes.
Lord Jesus, after 7,500 steps, I need to sit my sorry-behind down again—me and my bamboo walking stick that my husband got me to keep my steps steady and not face-plant on this glorious walking path at 76 years old (wouldn’t that be somethin’?).
As you know, this bench is my favorite spot to stop during my morning walks because it overlooks a glorious pond with geese, ducks, and storks feeding and playing. If ever I sense your presence, it is here in this holy place—the closest thing I come to attending church these days. It is also here that I tell you all about my troubles and worries. Today, I am worried that in spite of the triumphant week of hope and joy you gave us, that Trump’s cheating, lies, manipulation of the ballots and his militant whipping up of the MAGA/Christian Dominionists/Project 2025’ers will cause us to still lose the race to save our democracy and our country. Please help us…please add to our hope and joy enough votes that, come election day, it will be a blow-out for Kamala Harris and Tim Walz and no evil will prevail against them. Amen…amen!
CARTOON USED BY PERMISSION: 287441_US Presidential race by Paresh Nath, U.T. Independent, India
Well, Lord Jesus, I have the final 2,500 steps to finish before I arrive back home. I must say that I’m feeling pretty good, and I am not as panicked anymore—not like I was a couple of months ago when my hair was on fire! (Why do I have the sneaky suspicion that this was your plan all along: Expose Donald Trump as the hateful, lying, evil Emperor with No Clothes and continue to move America forward—in spite of our shortcomings—by electing the first woman president of color in our history, supported by a truly good man with godly character draped in your mantle of hope and joy instead of the MAGA banner of fear, hate, exclusion, and authoritarianism.) As I complete my 10,000 steps (feeling a bit smug that the old girl’s still got it!), I want to thank you for helping me lend my voice through House of Oz Undone (a cautionary tale)to be one of the many clarion calls to wake people up to your beacon of hope and joy during this monumental season. See you tomorrow morning! I love you, Lord!
CARTOON USE BY PERMISSION: 287872_No More Name Game by Christopher Weyant, The Boston Globe, MA
“House of Oz Undone is a brilliant venture through today’s societal themes. Setting out to find their home, heart, brain, and courage, a group of unlikely friends dissects the political and religious chaos they encounter traveling down the Yellow Brick Road. Funny, creative, and a little crazy, this book will have readers in hysterics.” —Kathryn Dare, San Francisco Book Review
Eleanor Tomczyk is a memoirist and humorist blogger renowned for her engagingly funny musings as an ex-Evangelical Conservative Christian (emphasis on the “ex”) and African-American Baby Boomer. Embarking on a new career as a storyteller at 60, she draws on her experiences in White Conservative churches. Now in her mid-70s and a wife, mother, and grandmother, Tomczyk has authored books such as Monsters’ Throwdown, Fleeing Oz, The Fetus Chronicles: Podcasts to My Fetus-self, and House of Oz Undone: A Cautionary Tale. She also runs a weekly humorous political blog titled “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” Her multifaceted career also spans roles as a singer, actress, motivational speaker, and award-winning voice-over artist.
Blog published by Howthehelldidienduphere? Publications LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.
It is finally here! My fourth book: The answer to my prayers regarding how to fight the existential crisis that awaits us in November 2024. Two years ago, I prayed the following prayer and posted it on my vision board:
“I want to write a book that is so widely read and seen that it breaks the “Talibanic” stronghold in Evangelical Christianity which is committing adultery with fascism and authoritarianism (an Uncle Tom’s Cabin book, so to speak). I want my words to start a revolution of truth and love in the heart that sets women and men free to live transformative lives of true love, freedom, mercy, grace, and truth instead of the hypocrisy currently masquerading as Christianity.
P.S. Hurry God! I’m already 73—not much time left for the task at hand.”
Well . . . I just turned 76 years old, and House of Oz Undone (a cautionary tale) is my birthday present to myself and to my readers. House of Oz Undone is a bold reinterpretation of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz for our time. It critiques the mix of truth and deception in modern faith. My book is a plea for societal reform against the dangerous mix of extremism and religion.
House of Oz Undone is more than a novel—it’s a call for truth and a catalyst for personal and societal change.
If you like my latest book, please leave a review on Amazon, write a blog about it, and/or take a selfie of you reading my book and post it on your social media accounts.Thank you!
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links of the author’s writing may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. However, the cartoons are under the governance of CagleCartoons.com and cannot be replicated.
(Apologies to Clement Clarke Moore’s “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas” for the butchering and ham-handedness of his iconic poem)
Cartoon used by permission: 244465_RGB_1290.jpg Halloween 2020 by Rick McKee CagleCartoonscom
‘Twas the night before the Presidential election, when all through the land,
Not a godly person was sleeping—not a child, woman, or man.
A landslide of votes had been cast for Joe Biden with care,
But folks were nervous that come the new day,
The Trump nightmare would still be there.
Cartoon used by permission: 243693_RGB_1290.png Axing Norms by Pat Bagley The Salt Lake Tribune UT
The Democrats were anxious as they snuggled in their beds,
While visions of a Biden win and Senate take-over danced in their heads.
And Pelosi in her Covid mask, and me in mine too,
Had finally calmed our hearts when we heard a loud “BOO!”
Cartoon used by permission: 244669_RGB_1290.jpg Running mate by David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star Tucson AZ
I wondered in my grogginess, what could be the disaster,
But soon spied a giant Covid spector and his Trump-like master.
Down to my knees I dropped like a flash,
Looked up to the heavens, and screamed: “Lawd Jesus, save po’ America’s ass”!
Cartoon used by permission: 244879_RGB_1290.png Donald Trump Undertakes the Pandemic by Dale Cummings Canada PoliticalCartoons com
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Illuminated the pumpkin-looking man with the Covid-orange glow.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
Trump’s idols, his lackies, and demons of fear.
More rapid than eagles, his flying gargoyles they came,
As he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
“Now Putin! Now Giuliani!
Now Lindsey and Fox News!
Come Hannity, and McConnell,
Come Repubs, and Laura Ingraham too.
“Back into the belly of the Oval Office!
And into the cowardly hearts of the Senate.
Y’all come visit—stay—for 2021 until forever,
‘Cause this Christian-idol mofo is guaranteed to win it!”
Cartoon used by permission: 244350_RGB_1290.png Happy Halloween 2020 by Bart van Leeuwen PoliticalCartoons com
But then in my nightmare, I heard on the roof
A stampede of angelic sandal-clad hoofs.
I ran to the window as thousands flew down
And trampled scary Trump
Into the Halloween ground.
They were led by Archangel Michael—
that champion from stories back in the day
His glorious Halloween costume was
Like a fashionable gay dude from the 1600’s, I’d say.
“Don’t let my outfit fool you,”
he said with a beatific grin.
“No evil is a match for me,
given my sword, wings and fabulous glam trim.”
Archangel Michael by Luca Giordano (1660 – 1665) – The Fall of the Rebel Angels/Public Domain
He spoke a few more words before vanquishing Trump:
“BE NOT AFRAID! The Orange one and his ghouls are a goner.
Tell all your frightened Dem friends
To have hope—Angels’ honor.”
Cartoon used by permission: 244862_RGB_1290.png Election Run by Pat Bagley The Salt Lake Tribune UT
Michael spoke not another word, and went back to his work,
Skewered all of Trump’s demon-pals, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose.
And giving a nod, up to the sky he arose.
His Arch-Angelness hung overhead, and to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew up like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he flew out of sight:
“2020 will not be like 2016!”
“Now calm your faint hearts and have a restful good night!”
Cartoon used by permission: 244884_RGB_1290.png You Are Fired by Marian Kamensky Austria
Eleanor Tomczyk is an author and a humorist who is an award-winning voice-over performer. In 2011, she created the blog, “How the Hell Did I End Up Here” which features mostly satirical posts that have thousands of readers around the world—although she was recently banned in Pakistan (for real!). Tomczyk’s three books were featured in a recent book festival: “Monsters’ Throwdown,” “Fleeing Oz,” and “The Fetus Chronicles—Podcasts to my Miseducated Self.” Currently in her 70s and living life like it is freakin’ golden, she is a consummate storyteller and much sought-after motivational speaker. If you don’t believe me, just ask her!
Cartoon used by permission: 244926_RGB_1290.png Zombie Trump by Pat Bagley The Salt Lake Tribune UT
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
How The Hell Did I End Up Here? is a non-commercial entertainment and social commentary blog about the author's life and a critique of public and political personalities, published news articles, and consumer venues. Any linked-to or reblogged images contained on this website remain the property of their respective copyright owner(s), have been used by contractual permission, are displayed under the fair use doctrine, or are part of public domain.
how the hell did i end up here? 