Happy Vijayadasami

A very happy Vijayadasami to those of you that celebrate the 9-day festival. We had a much scaled down version of the golu and had a grand total of two visitors. I did not particularly miss the usual celebrations. I am not sure if it is a sign of quiet acceptance or a reflection of pure laziness. All I know is the days passed by in the blink of an eye.

Covid numbers are surging again, everywhere. We will not be in this situation forever. Wherever you are, take care, and do your part. This too shall pass.

Little Moments this week

What little moments did I savor this week? 

  • Ram had the first half day of his phased-in hybrid week this week. It was a measly half day but that did not in any way diminish the excitement we all felt for the back to school day. The child woke up bright and early, made a sandwich for lunch by himself, and walked around the house with a renewed sense of purpose. Going back to school after six long months, who would have thought, really? 
  • Took the day off on Wednesday. The earlier day, I declared that I was going to plant myself on the daybed, binge watch, and not move as much as a tumbler. I ended up binge listening to podcasts on RBG, and decluttering my wardrobe. Decluttering while listening to podcasts relaxes me like no other!
  • Movie night on a weekday. Watched Enola Holmes on Netflix. Do watch it, a delightful movie. 
  • Learning a new dance item on the one and only elephant-faced darling, my all time favorite, Ganapathi. Nothing better to lift one’s spirits. And it is a gift that keeps giving. The fondness deepens as you learn and practice more. 

Little Moments Thursday

Things that brought a smile on my face…

  • Honesty of my fourth grader. “Amma, everyone was excited about school reopening. I feel normal.” 
  • Ram doesn’t complain to us about the Covid life situation but pours his heart out in unexpected quarters. In his 1:1 lesson with his guitar teacher. “I feel like we can’t be in this Covid thing forever. How long can we live like this?” 
  • The way Hari always reaches out to me. “Mom, you want to catch up?”, “Hey amma, I need 5 minutes of your attention, ok?” “So how is your work going?” It almost feels like friendship. 
  • Ram has come up with a hack to find out if I am paying attention to him or not. He totally says unrelated things nonchalantly. Like in the middle of the day, he would say, “good night mom” or “it’s snowing outside, time for hot chocolate.” I so love this hack, it breaks us into giggles. 
  • Welcome back hibiscus. Welcome back jasmine. We made a special corner for them in our dining room and brought our house plants inside.

An unsual start to school year

It has not been easy on anyone. The administrators, the educators, the caregivers, and most of all the young learners. After all the discussions, arguing, disagreeing, fighting over options, the moment of truth will be here tomorrow. Our first day of the new school year. Who would have thought on March 12th of this year that education would be this elusive. The pandemic has mellowed us all. Hopefully, it has changed us for the better. 

For us as a family, it feels like all our organization snafus and scheduling guffaws have prepared us for this moment. We used our state tax free weekend to order stationeries and supplies to help the kids get organized. We spent the long weekend setting up work area for the younger one. We spent this weekend setting up Google Classroom, keeping up with the flurry of emails from school, and setting reminders on Alexa, and in our calendars. Da and I reminded each other to do better than the random check in with the kids like we did in spring and to strive for some semblance for balance.

All of us will do what we can, knowing that some days our cups will be empty. We will embrace generosity of spirit, a phrase that our school system has taught us. Generosity of spirit. Towards each other. Towards ourselves. We are stepping into the new school year with trepidation but with hope and faith to make it work, and with the gratitude that it is finally here.

Hari and Ram – thank you for being such troopers this spring and all through the summer. For demanding so little out of us. Hari, special thanks to you for going with Remote option although your preference was to go Hybrid and we are acutely aware that this is not an easy path. We will lean in on each other and get through this together. May this year’s education help both of you learn, grow and evolve into better humans. Stay curious and be kind. Everything else will fall in place. Love and hugs, appa and amma.

Public school system, a Covid casualty

In the fight against pandemic, the public school system is the latest casualty. Our school committee public hearing lasted for 5 hours on two separate sessions last month. There are at least three different parent groups on Facebook related to school reopening. Our school system is proceeding with remote and hybrid options. There is a lot of nervousness, dissatisfaction and uncertainty over the options presented. Spring was a disaster. True, but we were at the start of a pandemic, we were focused on saving lives, there was no playbook on how to deal with a situation that weighed us down with its enormity. This is not to say I was all calm about it. I too was upset with the misleading expectations but came to terms with it and to an extent trust our school administrators to do their job. Ram did as well as a 9 year old can do on his own but there was parental failure. We did not adapt to the change in dynamics and step up to support him as much as we could have. I have learnt that we have to do our part, which looks very different compared to pre-covid times. As far as Hari, we don’t know what we don’t know. We have told him to stay informed, recognise that there will be less support and that he should have frequent check in with us so we can identify if additional help is needed. There is a real risk of loss of learning at the high school level but I have faith that the kids will adapt and reinvent.

When I have a rough day at work, I think to myself at least I am not the school superintendent who has the unenviable task of balancing conflicting needs. I recall her saying what used to take minutes now takes a lot of brainpower. It’s not easy, we all need to be part of the solution.

The latest I am hearing is families are creating pods to hire private tutors and supplement what’s taught at school. I am saddened by the inequities that the pandemic is creating but we all have to do what is right for us.

Things don’t look ok now but we will be ok.

A child of leisure, Covid summer

Not the one to sleep in, he wakes up before 7:00 AM on most days. He walks on his tippy toes, careful not to draw attention, sneaks into the office, grabs his Kindle, and scurries back to his room quite as a mouse. The book he had placed on hold a couple of weeks back is downloaded and he happily gets lost in it until his tummy grumbles. Ha, breakfast time! He descends downstairs imagining all the butter he is going to slather on the light fluffy croissant. The omelette his mom made before she hopped on her morning call is waiting for him at the counter. Croissant toasted, Bournvita mixed in creamy milk, and with omelette on the side, he heads out to the patio. With the morning breeze, and the chirping birds to give him company, he settles down on the bold and bright colored beach chair. He savors every bite of his breakfast, giving it his undivided attention, as if that is the only thing that mattered at that moment. 

His stomach and heart full, he takes his bike from the garage, goes up and down his street ten times like his dad has instructed him to. One check against his list of things to do for the day. He moves on to his music practice. It feels like work as he starts but soon he finds himself practicing more than he intended to. That is his second check mark on his list. Enough of check marks, this is summer, and he is not going to allow himself to be bound by checkmarks. So his footsteps take him to where his heart is. That book he was reading on Kindle in the morning. And before he knows it, his mom calls out for him for lunch. It’s spinach dhal with cabbage kai, not what he had hoped for but atleast better than the dhalai upma that he had the earlier night.

Lunch done, he heads to the home office, grabs his ipad and searches for knights and archers. He is in the mood to draw a scene in the battlefield.  Amused with his creation, he rushes to anna to narrate the story behind the scene. Big mistake, anna now wants to play basketball with him in the driveway. Not what he had in his mind.  Ayyoooo…!!! They dribble some but mostly they are chit chatting. About this and that. His anna is one of his favorite people on earth. They fight a lot but they also care for each other a whole lot. 

Reluctantly, he now revisits the list of things to do. Writing and math. He grabs his daily journal, and today he decides to write a review of the book he last read. Then he does some word problem on fractions. That’s it for today!  He has done more than his share of work. He decides to treat himself with a snack. He loves the ritual of assembling his snack. First he lays out all the crackers, eight of them. Then he takes a slice of cheddar cheese and a slice of swiss cheese, and deftly places them on the crackers. He grabs a mango yogurt. He heads to the living room, plonks himself on the couch, and enjoys the well deserved snack, one bite at a time.  The sharpness of the cheddar, and the blandness of the swiss competing to complement the salty crackers. By the time his snack is done, Appa and amma wind up for the day and they all head out for a walk in the neighborhood and soon after they will watch Baby Yoda and the Mandalorian.

A typical day in the summer of 2020. No camps, no hopping from soccer field to baseball diamond, no tension of being late to music class. Just being, no doing. A child of leisure, this has been his best summer.

Haiku, Ram’s take

Haiku was one of the topics covered in Ram’s third grade remote learning. He was fascinated by the notion of counting syllables and writing something around the 5-7-5 syllables structure. 

During summer break, we have stipulated that he write something every day. Originally, he came up with the idea of writing a chapter book that involved a zombie cat, super dog and other fun characters but then quickly changed his mind. Why bother writing pages when he can spend a fraction of time and energy writing Haikus. You see, it’s all about maximizing output with minimal efforts!

I will give it to the child. Everyday after breakfast, he settles down with a notebook in front of him and a pencil in hand. And I have the unenviable task of coming up with a topic that inspires him. “What do you think I should write mama?”  Some days it doesn’t take much. “I am in the mood for writing something about nature”  he would declare, and I would rattle some ideas. On other days, we are in a slump. Like today, the topic of Haiku ended up being Ovaltine. 

I am sharing a few of the Haikus he has written. I did not have the heart to change the spelling here, the beauty is in that imperfection, in that dripping innocence. A child’s take at the world around him. 

Leafs (Leaves)

Dancing in the wind

Floating away to the ground

Crunch under my fead (feet)

Black Lives Matter

Everyone is the same

Everyone is fair and square

Hashtag B.L.M.

Sun

It comes out on days

It showers its blazing rays

It goes home at night

Mother Earth

The earth protects us

She gives us the things we need

She is a good home

4th of July

We sit in the dark

Awesome fireworks pop up

I am having fun

Snake

He slithers around

He is hidden from his prey

Then he bites his prey

Racoon

He can be sneaky

He eats from your garbage can

He is a burglar

Chocolate

It is very good

It is smooth and deliscious (delicious)

It is dark delight

Bird’s Nest

He lives over there

Inside a home made of twigs

Housing all his eggs

Fauci, a Covid Inspiration

I am not alone in wanting to hang on to every word that comes out of Dr. Fauci’s mouth. The objectivity, the confidence, the separation of noise from issue. Just remarkable!

Jotting a few words from this article as source of inspiration.

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2020/07/trump-fauci-coronavirus-pandemic-oppo/614224/?campaign_id=9&emc=edit_nn_20200716&instance_id=20351&nl=the-morning&regi_id=111031039&segment_id=33535&te=1&user_id=f99f7a1bd0b5797d2659c8deeab40472

The Atlantic: Given this experience, do you still want to work with the administration? Have you thought about resigning?

Fauci: No. I think the problem is too important for me to get into those kinds of thoughts and discussions. I just want to do my job. I’m really good at it. I think I can contribute. And I’m going to keep doing it.

The Atlantic: We recently published a piece about burnout among public-health experts trying to fight this pandemic. You clearly have been very much a part of that. How are you doing? How are you coping?

Fauci: I’m doing okay; I’m doing fine. I am running a bit on fumes, but as they say, the fumes are really thick. It’s enough to keep me going. I wish we didn’t have a lot of those distractions, which I think are noise that gets in the way. But I put that aside, try not to let it bother me, and just move ahead.

Comic relief

The siblings in the house have been rambunctious lately. And tonight, there was above normal bickering. First, it was the whipped cream. “Look, he is pretending not to hear me. I asked him to put the whipped cream away. I set it on the table before dinner, so it’s his turn to put it back.” “I didn’t hear you, okay? Don’t blame me.” “How can you not hear me, you were right here” “I did not hear you because I did not hear you” “Now you are arguing for the sake of arguing.” 

Just as I was about to zone out of this delightful conversation, my gaze rested on the overflowing sink. An inspiration struck. Time for some character building exercise.

 “Enough already you two. Hari, you will rinse the dishes tonight and Ram, you will load them in the dishwasher,” I gave stern instructions. The siblings muttered under their breath and agreed on something for the first time for the whole evening.  “Let’s do what amma says before she gets ticked off.”  Alright, I am the villain in the story.  

 “Cleaning up dishes is disgusting. I feel like vomiting.” said the older one as he scrubbed the stainless steel bowl with oatmeal smeared on it, with an expression that looked like he had just encountered a roadkill. “How many cups of tea do you guys drink? Can you please just drink one cup of tea from tomorrow?” “And all this cheese is so hard to clean. Why don’t we just eat things that are easy to compost and don’t need cleaning?” “And maybe we should start eating on a banana leaf so we will have fewer plates to clean.” “Maybe it is a good idea to get a dishwasher that will do the cleaning by itself rather than us having to clean for it.” 

If only I didn’t have to pretend to be the responsible adult in the kitchen, I would have rolled on the floor laughing. Honestly, who needs Netflix and Hulu when there is comic relief playing right in your kitchen. 

Knowing that he got the lesser unpleasant task, the younger one made no comment and tried to stay unnoticed, randomly loading one spoon after the other in the rack. I reminded him that it will be his turn to clean the dishes the next day. He paused, shut his eyes tight in a vain attempt to summon tears on demand. 

 “Okay guys, I hope you all learnt something valuable today,” I asked the boys.

 “Yes, we know what it is to be appa and cleaning all the gross stuff,” came the response without skipping a beat. 

What? Not only am I the villain in the story, appa gets to be the hero? 

Ah well, the dishwasher was loaded and the rest of the evening was spent in pin drop silence. I can live with being the villain in the story.

Why is My Hair Curly?

Avantika shares a love hate relationship with her curly hair. It is unruly, it makes her stand out, and it makes her feel lonely in a family with straight and smooth hair. It kindles an intense longing to connect with her biological mother. How she comes to terms with her hair is the crux of the story.

Why is My Hair Curly? is set in India and follows a modern day family formed through adoption. Light yet profound, this story is very relatable to the young and the old. It is a story that can be read at different levels. My 9 year old giggled out loud at the humor and was captivated by how the illustrations so closely followed the story, and my 15 year old commented how there are several underlying themes that are worthy of deep dive. As for me, I hung onto every word in the story and fell in love with this warm and adorable family of four and its extended members.

If Lakshmi Iyer painted a story with her words, Niloufer Wadia brought those words to life through her illustrations. This is one book that you should judge by its cover. The story is funny, has twists and turns, and the author very subtly weaves in themes in an age appropriate manner. This is one of those books that stays with you long after you have turned the last page. You do not want to miss out on this book.