Tag: changes

The Month of Eclipse-ia

Posted on by sidraowens

The solar eclipse took place on August 21st of this year, and as far as that cosmic event was concerned; it was both eventful and uneventful.  I was able to view a total eclipse from the only vantage point available, since I was in Chapel Hill.  Handfuls of people stood outside my work building, looking up at the sun, viewing the eclipse, with some good hearted people sharing their eclipse glasses with those who didn’t have any.  A coworker of mine warned, as she departed for the day, that we should all look out for everyone else on the road, on the drive home.  Everyone is crazy, but the eclipse has made folks a special kind of crazy.

Depositing this in the back of my mind, I ended my shift and drove home.  Despite the fact that I was tired with no desire to go back out into traffic, there were still errands to run; the inevitable trip to walmart that we all take at least twice a week, so that we can all have our time and our cash sucked into oblivion.  Walmart disdain aside, we travelled our normal route, my family and I to get there, and while sitting at a dead stop, at a red light, waiting to turn left; a car on the far side of the wide and extremely busy intersection, ran the light at a moderate speed.  It was funny, for lack of a better term, because I saw the car coming.  I saw it veer, as though it were intentionally aiming right for us.  I just knew that the vehicle would realize its egregious error and correct itself, but it didn’t.  The car hit us at no more than 20 miles per hour, maybe even less.  We were fortunately, uninjured; shaken up, angry, scared, but alive and well.  The vehicle was still functional at that moment, not even aware that it was nearing its end.  As my hands began to shake, and the dismay at the incident took root immediately afterward; I had to watch, seemingly in slow motion, as the other car backed up, veered around us and sped off down the road.  I would’ve felt better if they had paused to give us the finger, but no, we got none of that.  No care, no assistance, no admittance, no apology, nothing.  We had two very polite and helpful witnesses, but no license plate.  We had a description of the vehicle, but the police didn’t arrive for another hour.  The brakes just barely brought the vehicle to a stop, as we moved it off of the road, all of the coolant leaked out, along with many other vital fluids.

In NC, if no one gets the plate in a hit and run, and no one is injured, then you have to eat it.  And that is what we did.  We had to eat it.  We had to eat the fact that even though, we could very well be getting spied on through our webcams by the NSA, there were no cameras at the intersection where the accident occurred.  We had to eat the fact that a tow that would normally cost 40 or 50 bucks, cost 165 since the police called for the tow.  We had to eat 35 a day storage fee, we had to eat a 70 dollar tow back to our home.  We had to eat the fact that paying for all this was eating into our food money.  Now how ironic is that.

Then there has to be the search for another car; having to most likely, acquire another bill.  Having to deal with loan applications and credit scores, and institutions telling you that your situation may be dire, but we cannot help you to keep it from getting worse.  Having to inconvenience others…  That may be the most unsettling part.

On the flip side of that, this entire ordeal has reacquainted me with my good fortune.  I am a believer in astrological signs, and I have read many times over the years, that Sagittarius’ are lucky.  In all of my immaturity, I would always think to myself, “Luck?  What the hell are they talking about?  I haven’t won the lottery or nothing like that.”  But in the past two years, I have looked back on my life and realized many instances where I was very fortunate.  Lucky.  Thankful that things had gone safely one way and not dangerously another.  My fortune allowed me to continue to get to work every day, without concern or having to explain to the supervisor my “situation.”  I was able to get food and supplies for my family whenever I needed it and not made to feel as though I was a burden.  I was even given access to another vehicle for a very short time, and in driving it, my luck rained upon me again, when a dry rotted tire blew only a minute from home, after I just turned off of the highway, allowing me to safely navigate the monstrous V-8 home without harm or incident.

This month my partner finally began to see the monetary benefits of all of his hard work, putting himself out there despite fears and doubts.  People signed up to come to my first book reading at far greater numbers than I had anticipated, google contacted me and now my novel is up on google play books and I got a couple a more sales to boot.

But on the other hand, my sciatica acted up so bad that standing still was excruciating, and I ate something, drank something or inhaled something that made my top lip swell with an allergic reaction.  So for a week I scratched the inside of it with my teeth, while slathering it with vaseline until it thankfully began to rebound.  And on top of that, our daughter caught a cold that she bounced back from in three days, while her father and I linger, with he even sicker than myself, but luckily my voice has cleared just in time for Saturday’s reading.

I found a car.  A car I wanted.  Not just something to get around.  It had a price decent enough, but still, another bill.  My propensity toward luckiness allowed me to be able to get this vehicle, even though I would need assistance; with the assistance seeming to be gladly offered; for future repercussions, we must stay tuned.

And despite a more than generous donation so that I would have books for my event, and despite ordering them in what I thought was a timely fashion, the books have not arrived.  Hell, that haven’t even shipped yet.  Messages went unreturned, chats unanswered, except to say your ticket has been resolved, we will email you with your order status, only to never do so.  I did finally speak to a person but she could not answer the questions of whether my books had been printed.  And even after two failed transfers, at least eight consecutive phone calls and two desperate messages, I am no closer to knowing their status.

Suffice it to say, it has been a more than interesting month.  The hills and valleys have been momentous, and the Sidra of ten years ago would have shed many a tear by now, but… tears don’t move you forward, especially when living means that life happens.  And I’m certainly not giving up on that.  Some things you have to get through, and smile as much as you can during while learning simultaneously.  I was stressed about the books last night, but that has passed.  We found more clues to the ailments that plague my partner, bittersweet, but answers are answers; and our daughter got into the run club that she’s wanted to get into for a year.  I promised she would.  Mission accomplished, thanks very much to my fortune.  I am fortunate and it cannot be measured in dollar signs.  All in all, I can say that this month has been unique, and I can’t label much more than that, because it just wouldn’t be descriptive enough.

-If you have enjoyed my commentary or my short stories, then please check out my youtube channel, The Wicked Orchard; where you can listen to me read my short stories

-And don’t forget to check out Comparative Reasoning here on wordpress for written commentary on a whole hosts of topics.

-If you’d rather listen than read, definitely check out Comparative Reasoning on youtube, where you’ll hear of earful of social, economic and political commentary.

My Debut Novel is also available for purchase:

 

Welcome Spring!

Posted on by sidraowens

Welcome Spring!

If you can see the image above, you may agree that it epitomizes the transition from winter to spring, or at least it used to.  This transition is far muddier than it used to be due to climate change.  For the entirety of the winter, our temperatures have been fluctuating from fall temps to spring temps to bitter cold and cycling randomly since before the arrival of winter.

So, in the context of the image above, the rabbit would get close to leaping into the vernal warmth and joy of the coming season, but lady spring would yawn, blink her eyes a little and then doze back off into sleep.

Since the ‘official’ start of a calendar spring kicked ofk yesterday, maybe she’ll snap awake and stretch out her arms, bringing bees, birds, beauty, pollen and storms, with as much wonder and suffering as one season can muster.

This time of year is also another opportunity to implement change.  It has been just over three months since the change of the new year, and maybe your resolutions have failed.  If you are not want to believe that change can come any day, then you can view spring as that next opportunity to do it better for the rest of the year.

Here’s to blooming, beauty and change!

 

 

Comparative Reasoning Exposes Hard Truths.

Posted on by sidraowens

The 2016 Presidential Election has been going full speed for nearly 17 months, and finally it is over.  It’s over and we are all dealing with the aftermath, the consequences, blow back.  But now, a question arises.  Is the election of Donald Trump and random freak occurrence?  (Doubtful)  Or is it the culmination of a system of subjugation spanning back hundreds of years?  I suspect that in reading that last line, you are compelled to think of slavery, Jim Crow, the Civil Rights Movement, but I’m talking about more than that.  Subjugation in our country affects the black, the brown, the disable, the poor and even the employed.  People in this country consistently work hard to make themselves feel good by putting someone else under foot.  And that is a grand injustice in this country.

There is a Youtube channel and WordPress blog called Comparative Reasoning that focuses on the many injustices bestowed upon the American people by the powers that be.  Comparative Reasoning was born during this election cycle, and it has many blog post and videos devoted to it; but in between that election material are gems that reveal a few of the true problems in this country.  Problems that have brought us, as a country, to this impasse.

It is important that we all understand that the problems of our country are not new.  They have been here since its inception.  Dormant, silent for some, but still ever present.  I implore you to take a moment and listen to these videos and/or read the posts, so that you may fully understand a point of view that is different than your own.  And to take it one step further, this is the opportunity to share your own opinion, or to form one.  We need to start the conversation; a conversation of understanding the differences, recognizing the injustices and unifying for a peaceful resolution, where we can all prosper.

Keep in mind that these videos are raw and passionate; mostly unscripted revealing the thoughts and emotions of the everyday person about issues that affect us all day to day.  And we want you to share with us.  Talk with us.  Leave comments here or on your youtube.  Let’s connect.  It’s truly the only and the best way to counter the systemic division that runs rampant in our country.

Burning Black Churches

Why Racism Persists

How Apathy & Empathy Shape the Nation

The Death of Informative TV

War on the Poor

Angry Rant for People Against Abusive Employers

 

-Please don’t forget to stop by Comparative Reasoning for even more thoughts and opinions.

 

 

An ‘E’ for an ‘E’

Posted on by sidraowens

When we are born, it’s all about us; our needs, our comfort, our sleep.  Human babies have needs and they usually have their needs met by screaming their heads off, when they’re not met.  Most people know this and I have mentioned it in past posts.

As we grow, one of the various roles of our parents is to teach us empathy.  Empathy is defined as the feeling that you understand and share another person’s experiences and emotions.  I have taken the time to include the definition because many people behave as if they have no idea what this word is, what it means or how it is shown….  But I digress.

As we get older, we should learn that our own individual wants and needs are not all that matters in the world.  We are not the center of the universe and all does not revolve around us.  This is how you can learn to show love for you parents and family, and feel sadness for their ills and misfortunes.  This, in turn, leads you to be able to comfort those around you.  These emotions can then extend to people outside your social and familial circle, allowing you to feel the pain of strangers in your own city, your own country and even abroad.

These feelings of empathy can lead one to charity work, wanting to help the disabled, the less fortunate, the sick and the destitute.  It could lead to participation in professions that aid others; doctors, nurses, teachers.

Empathy can lead other to give money out of their pocket, or food out of their kitchen, because sometimes money and food can run out just days before the next pay day.  And rather than let another go hungry, people will give of themselves.  Empathy allows you to identify with the misfortune of others, whether physical, mental, emotional or financial, because you understand that just a single flip of the cosmic coin and you might find yourself in the same position.

Unfortunately, empathy in our society is on the decline, a sharp and fast decline.  It is rapidly being replaced by entitlement.  Entitlement has a couple of definitions, but the one that I am focusing on is, the belief that one is inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.  There is a growing number of people in our society, who identifies with this definition.  It is deeply associated with instant gratification.  As children, we have no real sense of time.  A child asks for a treat and mom says, in 20 minutes.  Two minutes pass, and the child asks for it again.  The child is reminded that 20 minutes hasn’t passed and they need to wait.  Five more minutes pass and the child asks again.  Having no sense of time, they don’t understand having to wait.  The patience of waiting comes over time with proper instruction.

The problem is that teenagers and adults that are well past this stage of development, exhibit the same behavior.  Not because they have no sense of time, but because they want what they want, when they want it and feel that they should not have to wait for anything, just because they’re them.  They think that they are better or special.  They think that their plights, problems and desires come ahead of everyone else’s.  This sense of entitlement leads to a complete and total lack of empathy.  They don’t know what it’s like to be sick without insurance, so the idea of needing public assistance for medical care is ludicrous.  It’s costing them.  They have never been disabled or associated with anyone with disabilities, so they don’t care for programs to help them.  They’ve never been persecuted because of their race, sex or age, so they go so far as to believe that these things never happen, just because it has never happened to them.

Apathy is the bedfellow of entitlement and it is eating away at the conscience of society.  It is a bigger problem than racism, classism, sexism, terrorism and money in the political system.  It is a bigger problem, because if people don’t give a damn about other people, they are liable to do anything to them without remorse.  We see it all the time.  A kid gets drunk, gets in a car and runs over people on the side of the road, killing them.  He gets house arrest and even after a light sentence, he breaks his probation and tries to flee the country.  His life is more important than the lives he took.  A police officer pepper sprays peaceful protesters and ends up suing for emotional trauma.  The supposed Democratic Party sabotages the campaign of one of their own; one who cared for the rights of all people, rich, working and poor, in favor of someone who has the interests of those who already have enough over those who barely have anything.

Empathy has always been a rather ethereal, wispy concept, sometimes slipping right through the fingers, but from time to time in the history of our country, we, as a society, have been able to grip it firmly and lift each other up; but it was never easy.  It took hard work and sacrifice, pain and death.  But now, empathy can’t even be seen floating on the winds.  More often than not, we are every man for themselves and to hell with the rest.

So…

What can we do?

Well, we could just be better, but that takes effort that the apathetic and entitled don’t want to exert.  So, it’s up to us who give a damn, to be mindful and vigilant and take every opportunity to inspire a change in our world; one conversation, one phone call, one post; one vote at a time.  Taking these strides may change things from the smallest interaction between you and a co-worker to the world stage which governs our society.  Close your eyes and for once, picture yourself in someone else’s shoes.  Train yourself, as we should train our children; like we used to train our children, to be patient, understanding and kind.  Bullying children turn into bullying adults; but adults can choose to be better, they just have to want it be better.