I know that song lyrics are sometimes something that needs to be interpreted, and that, when having to rhyme, it’s not always easy to come up with something that sounds good. I also know that song lyrics don’t always have to make sense. Hell, no Nirvana or Bush song ever made sense. However, there have been some lyrics that are so stupid that I feel compelled to point them out.

“If I can ever breathe in the air maybe then I wouldn’t suffocate.” Sevendust, Suffocate.

Really, Sevendust? Is that how the whole breathing thing works? I would never have known that if you hadn’t said anything…..

“I dodge the grave almost every day.” Sevendust, Dead Set

I love this song, but that line has always annoyed me. There’s only one day, in everyone’s life, where they don’t dodge the grave, so this is not news. Give me a call when you start dodging bad lyrics.

“Everyone’s eyes are blue. Everyone’s mouth is dry. And nobody wants to die in Van Nuys.” Sixx: A.M., Van Nuys

As to the first statement, it’s false. While I might have blue eyes, my wife doesn’t, so therefore: not everybody has blue eyes. Second statement: also false. My mouth is not dry, so you’re wrong again. Third statement: this one can be interpreted in a couple of different ways. Is it that nobody who lives in Van Nuys wants to die, or is it that out of all the places in the world that you can die, nobody would pick Van Nuys? I’m sure that the majority of the people in Van Nuys don’t want to die, but I’d bet that at least one person there does, so that interpretation is false. As to the second, I’m pretty sure that people, if told they were going to die, wouldn’t care where they were when it happened, so I’m going to call BS on that one as well.

I had a list that had more on it, but I seemed to have misplaced it. These were just the ones I could remember off the top of my head. If I find the list, or just think of any more, I’ll put them on here. Are there any song lyrics that you think are stupid?

Here are a few more that I’ve found:

“For some fun there is always sex, hiding in the corner like a shy T-Rex.” Hot Action Cop, Busted

This line is so stupid. The rest of the song is great, but the sheer idiocy of this line makes me want to punch something.

“I can’t decide if I’m aware that I’m on trial.” Shinedown, All I Ever Wanted

Being aware of something isn’t something you can decide on. Either you’re aware of it, or you’re not.

The last one is another song by Sixx: A.M. I don’t have a problem with one particular line in the song, I have a problem with the premise of the song. The song is about relapsing while trying to overcome heroin addiction. The song’s name is “Accidents Can Happen”. The reason I have a problem with it is this: You don’t accidentily shoot up or snort heroin (or however the hell heroin is taken). If you do it, you do it on purpose. So, by saying, “You know that accidents can happen and it’s ok. We all fall off the wagon sometimes,” they’re spewing a whole bunch of stupidity.