During the summer months, because it gets so hot in the warehouse, I’m allowed to wear shorts. However, if I have to go into the tech room for some reason, I’m not allowed to wear shorts. You have to wear pants in there. So, I keep a pair of pants in my locker at work.
Normally, this would be an unimportant detail. Yesterday, though, it proved very important….I ripped my pants.
They were older jeans, that I really only wore to work, and the seam in the crotch ripped apart. I groaned, thinking I had to go the rest of the day with ripped pants. That’s when I remembered I had that pair in my locker. I immediately walked towards the locker room.
On my way there, I ran into the woman who works in the office. You may remember her from this story. She stopped me and asked me about a radio we were having trouble finding. After I told her that I found it, she looked down and saw my pants.
“You have a big hole in your crotch,” she said.
Before my brain could stop my mouth, I responded with, “Yeah? Well, so do you.”
Oops. I should’ve done a facepalm on myself, but, instead, I watched as her face crinkled up in confusion. She looked down at her pants and replied, “No, I don’t.”
Thankfully, she missed what I actually meant and thought I was talking about her clothes. I ended up playing it off as a “I made you look” joke, not the “you have a giant cooter” joke that it actually was, and got out of there as quickly as I could.
I’ve been making jokes like that (and smartass comments….and sarcastic remarks…) for as long as I can remember. I learned a long time ago (after getting myself into trouble a large number of times) that I need to check myself before speaking.
Apparently, I need to continue to work on it…..
33 Grams of Blog 
Bahahaha! This is why I work from home. I’ve got the same problem.
I need to figure out how to work from home….
No pants required…
Bawahaha! Annnddd just like your brother. He just ripped his pants a couple of weeks ago. I love the smart ass comment you gave to your co-worker and it’s both funneh and good that she didn’t clue in!
What’s wrong with being like my brother? It not our fault that our pants are bursting with goodness…
pft
Ha, you said cooter! That’s a great word. You ripped your pants…good lord, that reminds me of a Sponge Bob episode that will be in my head all night, so thanks for that, sir!
Cooter is an awesome word. It’s not said nearly enough….
Hahahahahaha.*breathes*hahaha. Cooter…LMAO. Good that she didn’t catch on. That could have been really bad. Don’t forget to bring another pair of pants to work.
Since I didn’t have anywhere to stop on my way home, I put the ripped ones back on when I clocked out. That way I still had my extra pair in my locker.
That was a close one and a good save!!!!
I’m usually good on my feet…or something…
My mouth is still on the floor…..LOL *Cat*
I’m sure hers would be too, if she knew what I was talking about.
Dude. That’s really funny. If I did that at work, I’d get a one-way ticket to Human Resources. I’d probably have to watch one of those sensitivity videos.
Those sensitivity videos offend me!
Funny….
It is now. At the time I was worried about getting in trouble.
Damn, anyone who doesn’t even get that comeback is probably not the kind of person who is going to laugh it off if it was explained to her. Good save. I’m glad there are people at my workplace (even females) who I can safely make smartass cracks like that to….
Well, English isn’t her first language. She’s still not up on all of the dirty-minded meanings of some things.
OH MY GOSH! You’re so freaking lucky! Good job passing it off as a made you look joke. I think my cheeks would have flushed so vibrantly red that she would have then known exactly what I’d meant.
I don’t embarrass easily. In this case I might have, but I was too busy being angry at myself for not stopping myself from saying it in the first place.
Kind of funny how anger seems to trump everything else, especially when it is anger directed at ourselves.
That was so close to a sexual harassment lawsuit… I couldn’t get into the Vatican when I was in Rome because I was wearing shorts… I think they have relaxed that rule.
They may be called “boxer shorts”, but they don’t technically qualify as actually being shorts.
right
Or I might have gone with: fighting trousers…
Lucky escape there, Revis.
Clearly there’s something doing the rounds that’s secretly attacking the trousers of the men in your family… Does that mean you should warn them? Of course not. No humour in that. 😉
Being a zombie killing rogue ninja makes escaping easier.
Bwahahahaha!
Yeah, I think you might need to work on that a “little” more . . .
Maybe a smidge…..
Good thing she isn’t too quick-witted or you would be fried!
Like I said, English isn’t her first language. I’m sure if I said it in Japanese, I would’ve been fried.
I like your humor, Revis!
Thanks, Hook. All I need to do now is remember where I’m at, and who is around, before I open my mouth. Otherwise I may be an unemployed comedian….
[…] there, I’ve had to work with the Japanese woman in the office (You may remember her from this story. Or maybe this one instead) a lot more than usual. Yesterday, she was in the tech room with the guy […]
LOL that was a good one. I have the same problem with being impulsive and speaking before thinking. I’ve gotten myself into trouble a few times over it, so I, too, must work on it. Sitll LMAO!