I haven’t put any Newb stories up here in a while, but I really haven’t had to work with him all that much lately. I will tell you a story about something he did last night.

I was sitting in the break room talking to my supervisor, asking him why he had called me an asshole earlier in the day. He said that he wasn’t talking about me, he was calling Newb the asshole. Suddenly, we hear a thump at the security door, as if someone had walked into it. I looked around and noticed that Newb wasn’t around. “I bet it was Newb pushing on the door instead of pulling it,” I said.

Everyone got a chuckle out of that, but it turned into full-blown laughter when Newb emerged from the door a few seconds later. I had to gloat, “I told you so.”

The rest of the night, he was bombarded with people reminding him to pull on the door when he went to leave, instead of pushing again. It was awesome.