Replying to @SheWantsThe_E
I’m signing all of my emails “with insurmountable pleasure” moving forward. Well done!
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13.2K posts
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@stockit2theman
C.R.E.A.M (Cheese Rules Everything Around Me)
Joined July 2013
- Replying to @lovesometaylorHeavy on the leave men who are mean to you 🔊🔊🔊🔊 glad you’re happy and safe now and your flight or fight isn’t activated every single second of the day. It’s so draining. 🫶🏼
- I made Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5 my alarm and I honestly start the day off unmatched enthusiasm.
- Replying to @barstoolsportsSomeone must have taken a lot of time to create this detailed timeline of a post. Oh, wait, it was @clairecdowns and y’all just stole her thread without crediting. I would expect nothing less. Rock on, Barstool.
- Replying to @chrisfolseMy bro and I were tearfully at my dad’s casket, speaking to him. Kyle said tearfully, “I love you so much, Dad. I miss you. You were the best father…. I know I was your fave child by a landslide” caught me so off-guard, we laughed for a much needed 5 mins. Sorry for your loss!
- Replying to @alexremniqe and @ellorysmithI laughed entirely too hard at this. Thank you.
- Proud to say this is my physical therapistMike McDaniel is SO good. He also in the stands greeting fans during the game. 😂 #MiamiDolphins #FinsUp
- Replying to @LarkerStevenson and @maiamindelSeriously! I grew up on a cattle farm with chickens and I’m just like…. And she said dairy, no less. Enjoy milking those cows at 4 am before a long day of cooking, sewing, housework, and taking care of kids - all on your own.
GIF - I got offered a promotion at work and my future boss said, “it’ll be a lot of wining and dining -“ and I said, “AS LONG AS THERE’S NO 69ING, AMIRIGHT?!” and he looked terrified but still offered me the job, so
- Warm weather makes me want to drink. Every single day.
- And there's something wrong with a system that puts pot dealers away for longer than violent rapists.
- Can you imagine how less populated the world would be if women had to orgasm to procreate?
