revis and matticus save the kingdom chapter 8

“You’re a spy,” Revis asked incredulously.

“How did you guess,” Steph returned. “Did me telling you that give it away?”

“Sarcastic comments are a good way to get a dagger shoved up your….”

“What my knight meant to say,” Matticus interjected, “is that you’ll understand if we don’t trust you right away. Too much is at stake for us to just take your word for it.”

She gave Revis a quick dirty look before turning to Matticus. “And how am I supposed to earn your trust?”

“First, you have to answer all of our questions.”

“I have no problem answering your questions. Your knight can take his questions, turn them sideways, and shove them up his….”

“Revis,” Matticus interrupted again, “can you give us a minute?”

The First Knight pulled Matticus aside. He handed the Jester a vial. “Drink this.”

He did as he was told, but he gave Revis a weird look as he did so. “What was that?”

“A truth potion. Now, whenever someone tries to lie to you, you’ll hear the truth anyways.”

“Really,” Matticus asked, deep in thought. “What did you think of that mermaid girl who gave us the wrong directions?”

Revis said, “Uhhh, I don’t want to do this,” but what Matticus heard was, “She was hot.”

Hiding a smile, Matticus stated, “Ok, now I can ask her the questions.”  Revis stepped away to keep watch, and Matticus returned to Steph to begin the interogation.  “Sorry, Revis can come off a bit rough sometimes.  They don’t teach charm in Knight school anymore.”

“That’s okay,” Steph replied, shrugging her shoulders.

Matticus smiled as he heard the truth, “He’s an idiot.”  Then he began questioning her, “Do you know where we can find Jaded?”

“No.”

That was all he heard, she’s was telling the truth.

“Why did you start spying on the vampires?”

“I  noticed things changing around here and wanted to see what was going on.  In the beginning there were just a couple vampires and they were throwing money around trying to buy their way into positions of power.  The guards and the citizenry, for the most part, were happy to take the gold and silver.  I got swept up in the ferver and decided it was better to hide in plain sight, see what they were really up to, and then figure out how best to either get away from them or bring them down.”

Again, she was telling the truth.

Matticus thought for a minute about what to ask next.  There was so much more he and Revis needed to know, the lack of information was daunting.  “What have you learned?”  It was a simple enough question that would hopefully fill in a lot of the gaps in their knowledge.

“From what I’ve been able to gather, all of their time and effort have gone into moving people and equipment to Kuzco Groove, the island out in the middle of the Golden Sea. Although I’ve helped them arrange transport, they never did tell me why they needed it. Plus, none of the people have returned yet, so I haven’t been able to ask them. ”

“Any theories?”

“There’s something on that island that they need, but they can’t find it, which is why they need all of the equipment and workers.”

“Do you have any idea what they might be looking for?”

“All they said was that once they found ‘it’, the kingdom would be theirs for the taking. They never said anything about what ‘it’ might be.”

“Hmmm, we need to get out to that island.”

“I can get you two on the next ship they’re sending out there. It leaves tomorrow morning. That’s what the meeting tonight was supposed to be about: who was going to be sent to help the search effort.”

“Are you sure you don’t mind helping us?”

“I’d do anything to help the kingdom,” Steph said, but the potion added, “Plus, it’ll get your knight far away from me.”

Matticus was pleased to know the potion was stll working.  “Won’t they be suspicious about the warehouse fire?  Could that mess up us getting on the boat undetected?”

Steph thought about the two questions for a long time, and the Jester felt his mind start to wander again, as it was apt to do when there were lulls in conversation, eating, playing, adventuring.  Before he could stray too far though, Steph brought him back to reality, “It should take them awhile to sift through the remnants of the fire to try and figure out if it was an accident or not.  The vampires are very arragont and probably won’t believe it possible that anyone could have started the fire and trapped so many of them in the warehouse without detection.  And, they certainly won’t want to delay their search, so would send the next ship out to the island anyway.”  The potion added, “I think” and Matticus frowned.  “I should be able to get you onto the ship and hidden.  Once you make it to the island you’ll be on your own, though.”  Again the potion added, “except for all the vampires already out there organizing the search efforts, of course,” and Matticus’ frown deepened.

Despite his uneasiness with the truth behind Steph’s words, he thanked her for her help and signaled to his knight that he could rejoin them. When Revis got back to their side, Matticus filled him in on the plan to go to Kuzco Groove. The three of them silently made their way to the ship. Steph wanted to get them onboard, and out of sight, before any of the other vampire helpers boarded. She got them situated in the back corner of the cargo hold.

“The trip should only take a day, maybe a day and a half. You two should be all right until then,” she informed them.

“Thanks again,” Matticus replied. “Also, again, I’m sorry for how my knight acted towards you.”

“That’s ok. I’ve dealt with worse,” she said, but the potion added, “At least he has a nice ass.”

Matticus watched her walk away, but only because needed a few seconds to keep himself from laughing at that last statement. Once he composed himself, he turned to his knight. “Sorry, we kept you out of it, but you should’ve been nicer to her.”

“That’s ok. I’ve dealt with worse,” he echoed. Matticus couldn’t stop the laughter when the potion put more words to his sentence too, “At least she has a nice ass.”

A few minutes later movement and voices from the deck above them were the duos warning to quiet down and tuck themselves completely into their hiding spot.  The early footfalls and half heard murmurs turned into a torrent of creaks, groans, and shouted commands and the ship’s crew boarded along with the rest of the vampire helpers and the boat was made ready for the sea.  The sails were raised and the slight rocking motion of the ship was strengthened as the vessel left the shallow waters of the harbor.

Revis and Matticus longed for a window, to catch a fresh breath of air, to watch the rise and fall of the waves to better steady their feet with the swaying ship, but their hiding place offered none of those comforts.  They tried to find respite in sleep but their minds wouldn’t relax enough to allow it.  They tried to speed the passage of time through meditation but neither were very good at it.  In the end, they gave up and resigned themselves to the tumultuous nature of being blind in the belly of a boat.

After hours of the torture, when the commotion on deck was sure to cover his whispered voice, Matticus turned to Revis and said, “I hope what we find on the island is worth this.”

“Me, too.”

revis and matticus save the kingdom, chapter 2

“The problem with Bruges,” Matticus stated as he trudged beside Revis, “is that it’s impossible to find.”

“Well, that and the place is boring as hell,” Revis retorted with a scowl.

“That’s the whole problem.  Because it is boring no one ever goes there.  Because no one ever goes there is no need for proper signs.  Because there are no proper signs it is impossible to find!”

The frown on Matticus’ face matched his companions.  Needing a break, unaccostomed to carrying the extra weight of the armor and a sword, the jester king leaned up against a tree.  It was a tree he recognized very well because he had seen it three times before.

“We are going in circles.”

Revis stopped and faced his leige, and took a moment to wipe the sweat from his brow.  The heat of the day and the miles were beginning to take a toil on even his well conditioned body.  His eyes swept beyond Matticus to the trail they had been following.  He peered down it intently and then turned to face the direction they had been headed.

“Yes.”

“And what are we going to do to rectify that situation?”

Suddenly, Revis cried, “Down,” as he tugged on the front of Matticus’ armor. Looking up, he saw an arrow lodged in the tree he had just been leaning against. Had Revis not pulled him, the arrow would’ve hit him in the chest. He crawled around to the back of the tree, putting it between himself and his attacker. Unsheathing his sword, he peeked around the edge.

Whoever shot the arrow was adept at hiding, because he didn’t see them. He also didn’t see Revis. That didn’t surprise him, however, as Revis was a master at blending in to the background. Turning  to peer around the other side of the tree, he was shocked to find himself staring down another arrow. This time, it hadn’t left the crossbow yet. Seeing who wielded the crossbow was another shock. It was one of the “sparkly” vampires.

Even after looking closely, Matticus couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman. It seemed to be both, although its mannerisms favored the feminine side. For just a second, he thought about asking it whether it was male or female, but it interrupted his train of thought. “Where is the other one,” it asked.

“Right behind you,” Revis said, as he plunged his dagger into the back of its skull.

Revis withdrew his dagger and Matticus scrambled out of the way as the body slumped forward.

“Take it’s head!”

“It’s not dead?”

“No!  Quickly!”

The vampire was already beginning to stir from the awkward angle it had come to rest leaning head down against the tree.  It’s neck presented an easy target and Matticus didn’t hesitate any longer.  With all his strength he hefted his sword and sliced downward.  Even then he was almost too late.  The vampire had recovered quickly and an instant later it would have been able to turn and resume its attack.

The head thumped softly at Matticus’ feet and he kicked it away.  A look of disgust full across his face.  He cleaned his blade in a nearby patch of grass and sheathed the sword.  Turning to face his knight, he considered saying “thank you” for saving his life, but dismissed that bit of nostalgia.  It was Revis’ job to save his life.

“So, that’s a sparkly vampire?”

“Yep.”

“Okay.  That’s fun.  And how many of them are there?”

“I don’t really know.  There numbers seem to be growing uncontrollably, especially among young men and women.”

“Interesting.”

“Not really.”

“No, not really, and we are still lost.”

After sitting down to grab a bite to eat, and discuss a new plan of action, the duo took off in the opposite direction that they had been going in. This path was more overgrown than the last one, but it was something different. Two hours in, they came across the Golden Sea. Their moods improved immediately, as now they should be able to follow the coast to Bruges.

That plan soon proved to be impossible when they ran into a cliff that rose hundreds of feet into the air. Without any climbing gear, they couldn’t scale the cliff. Swimming around it was out of the question, as well, because their armor and weapons would weigh them down too much. It seemed like their only option was to follow the cliff inland and hope to find some place to cross. Matticus, sighing at the prospect of a lot more walking, caught movement out of the corner of his eye.

Out in the water, perched on one of the rocks, sat a beautiful woman. She had large dark, almost black, eyes, long golden hair, and a shiny gold tail. Wait, Matticus thought, a tail? “Hello,” she shouted, to be heard over the waves. “My name is Goldfish. Who are you two?”

“It’s the lady of the lake,” Matticus stammered under his breath.

Revis raised an eyebrow, “What?”

“Nevermind.”  Addressing the mermaid, “I am Matticus, the Royal Jester of the nearby kingdom, and this is Revis, my First Knight.”

Goldfish studied the questing companions for a moment, then smiled and slipped gracefully into the water.  Her long tail powered her forward, Matticus and Revis stood in awe, mesmerized by a sight neither had seen before, and the beautiful creature came closer to shore.  She emerged from the surf, pushing her upper body out of the sand with graceful, and strong, arms.  She cupped her two hands under her chin and tilted her head over so slightly to the right.  The tide ebbed and flowed around her but she payed it no mind.

“Are you lost?  No one ever finds their way to my beach on purpose.  You have to forget where you are to make your way here.”  Her voice was like music.

Not wanting to disclose too much information about their quest, not sure if the mermaid could be trusted, Revis and Matticus exchanged a quick glance to make sure they were on the same page.  They would tell her they were trying to find Bruges but wouldn’t say more than that.  For all they knew, Goldfish could have been an agent of the sparkly vampires.

“Do you happen to know the way to Bruges?”

“Of course, I do. It’s the closest city for you surface-dwellers.”

“Great. Can you tell us how to get there?”

“Sure. If you follow the cliff inland for half a day, you’ll come across a road. The road will lead you over the cliff and straight to Bruges.”

The duo thanked Goldfish and turned to walk away. Before leaving the beach, Revis could’ve sworn he heard the mermaid call him something derogatory (something about a female cleansing utensil), but, since they were hot and tired, he attributed it to his mind playing tricks on him. Matticus and Revis followed her directions for the rest of the day. They didn’t find the road, so they stopped to sleep. Thinking that maybe they hadn’t gone far enough, they spent most of the next day looking for the road some more. When they still didn’t find it, Revis looked at Matticus. “I think we need to pay that friendly mermaid another visit.”

Guest Post: Why can’t they get this one right?

Please welcome Matticus to 33 Grams of Blog. As some of you know, I’ve visited Matticus over at The Matticus Kingdom on a couple of occasions and, in return, he has made me the First Knight over his realm. Well, today he’s paying me a visit. Matticus is a man of many faces. He’s the husband of the Queen, the father of the Prince, a great writer, and an awesome guy. He’s 33 grams of Jester. Once you read this, please go over and visit the Kingdom. Check out the rest of his awesomesauce.

Continue reading

Guest Post: Shifting Perspective

Hey there, everyone. I want you to welcome Len, from oliveloft.com. Len is an incredibly talented writer, and artist, who decided to stop by for a visit. Although how he has time to write this for me when he has classes to go to, his own posts to write, pictures to draw, and fantasy football to play, I don’t know (Maybe he has a clone that does some of the work for him.) Anyways, if you like what you read, please stop by and visit his blog. You’ll be glad you did.
Continue reading