Heavy State Welfare Socialism: Every Need Is A Future Department
Heavy State Welfare Socialism: Every Need Is A Future Department | The DWP Should Be Replaced By Something Kinder And Bigger
Month: December 2011
London Confidential
London Confidential | Five Things London Confidential Knows But Will Never Admit Publicly
Europe Cancels Eurovision Tour
Europe Cancels Eurovision Tour After Discovering Glitter Cannot Be Shipped In Bulk Unforeseen Challenges, Foreseen Drama, And A Warehouse Full Of Capes BRUSSELS, A BUILDING THAT LOOKS LIKE A USB PORT. The pan-European Eurovision Live Tour has officially been cancelled after organisers encountered what internal documents described as…
Iranian Warship Sinks
Iranian Warship Sinks Off Sri Lanka, Leaving 100 Missing and One Very Confused Geography Teacher In what military historians are calling “the most dramatic maritime disappearance since your uncle’s fishing boat drifted into a margarita bar in Cancun,” an Iranian warship has sunk off the…
British Sports Fishing
Britain’s Sea Fishing Obsession Quietly Revealed as National Therapy Programme for Men Named Dave LONDON — British sea fishing is the only sport where men willingly spend £6,000 on electronics to locate a fish with the emotional value of a disappointed sandwich. Across the windswept coastlines of…
London Post Boxes: The Cheerful Red Pillars Of The Streets
London Post Boxes: The Cheerful Red Pillars Of The Streets | London post boxes are the cheerful red pillar boxes that stand on street corners across the city, beloved cast-iron landmarks of scarlet.
London Swimming Now Includes Braving Ponds That Are Genuinely Freezing
London Swimming Now Includes Braving Ponds That Are Genuinely Freezing | Outdoor swimmers confirm the cold is the entire bracing point
London to Amsterdam Train Makes Borders Feel Embarrassing
London to Amsterdam Train Makes Borders Feel Embarrassing | London to Amsterdam Train Explained to People Who Forgot There Was a Sea
Greenwich: South East London’s Historic Flex With a Telescope
Greenwich: South East London’s Historic Flex With a Telescope | Greenwich London Neighborhood Satire With Time, Tourists, and Moral Authority
Lambeth: South London’s Permanent Protest With a Pram
Lambeth: South London’s Permanent Protest With a Pram | Lambeth London Neighborhood Satire With Councils, Culture, and Constant Motion
London O2 Arena Seating Plan: Map Designed by Optimists
London O2 Arena Seating Plan: Map Designed by Optimists | Greenwich Venue Seating Diagram Continues To Suggest Sightlines That Reality Sometimes Adjusts
Flights London To Dublin: Sixty Quid And A Faint Smell Of Duty-Free Toblerone
Flights London To Dublin: Sixty Quid And A Faint Smell Of Duty-Free Toblerone | Flights London to Dublin take about 1h20 with Aer Lingus, Ryanair and BA – cheap, frequent, and over before your tea cools. A deadpan flyer’s guide.
Péter Magyar Defeats Viktor Orbán
Péter Magyar Defeats Viktor Orbán, Confirms That “Resigning Spectacularly” Remains the Most Effective Career Strategy Known to Man Five Observations From a Nation That Has Just Handed In Its Collective Notice — With Two-Thirds of the Votes Hungary has always been a land of deep…
Socialism Will Save Israel?
Socialism Will NOT Save Israel!!! In April 2026, a group of leading UK Progressive rabbis — including Rabbi Charley Baginsky, Co-Lead of Progressive Judaism in the UK, and Rabbi Josh Levy of the Movement for Reform Judaism — publicly argued in the Guardian that the current direction…
London Futball: Where Tactics, Therapy, and Tribalism Collide
London Futball: Where Tactics, Therapy, and Tribalism Collide | London Futball and the Capital’s Sacred Obsession
Top 20 London Accountant Jokes
Top 20 London Accountant Jokes That’ll Be Tax-Deductible If You Try Hard Enough The London accountant is one of the unsung professionals of the city — quietly heroic, deeply patient, and possessed of the particular skill of looking at a shoebox of receipts in March…
Whitechapel: East London’s Historic Grit With a Clinical Precision
Whitechapel: East London’s Historic Grit With a Clinical Precision | A Neighbourhood That Keeps Working
Brexit and the Civil Service: How Whitehall Implemented the Biggest Administrative Task Since the Second World War
Brexit and the Civil Service: How Whitehall Implemented the Biggest Administrative Task Since the Second World War | Article 50, DExEU, Trade Deal Negotiations, Operation Yellowhammer, Civil Service Strain, and the Permanent Secretaries Who Served the Government of the Day While the Government of the Day Changed Several Times
Divorce Myths
Divorce Myths at prat.UK: The Only Guide Written by People Who Have Seen a Toaster Divided in Mediation Five Humorous Observations to Begin Your Emotional Descent Divorce is the only industry where two people can both claim they were “keeping the peace” while arguing over…
UK Employment Advice
Five Observations About UK Employment Advice British job centres now consider “wearing trousers to the interview” a sign of leadership potential. In London, arriving only 40 minutes late counts as “excellent time management under difficult rail conditions.” One HR manager in Croydon reportedly hired a…
Andrew Moves to Marsh Farm
Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor Moves to Marsh Farm, Discovers Royal Exile Comes With a Pet Policy and Fewer Rooms Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor arrived at Marsh Farm the way history often arrives for people who insist they are misunderstood: quietly, through a side gate, while contractors were still bolting on security…
London Y2K: City Panics Politely and Saves Screenshots
London Y2K: City Panics Politely and Saves Screenshots | London Y2K Explained for People Who Still Remember Midnight
Micro-Intimacy for British Couples
Experts Recommend “Micro-Intimacy” for British Couples; Nation Attempts a 30-Second Forehead Touch and Asks If That Counts Relationship Scientists Invent New Name for Trying; Britain Tries It Once, Reports Results Inconclusive LONDON — Relationship scientists have identified the solution to Britain’s emotional satisfaction crisis, and…
United Kingdom Vacation: Pack Layers and Lower Expectations
United Kingdom Vacation: Pack Layers and Lower Expectations | British Holidays Successfully Train Visitors To Find Joy In Conditions That Other Cultures Consider Discouraging
All Hallows By The Tower London: Roman Floors, Great View
All Hallows By The Tower London: Roman Floors, Great View | All hallows by the tower london is the ancient riverside church hiding Roman remains in its crypt and offering a fine free view of the bridge.
Kenley: Where London Quietly Practices Being Sensible
Kenley: Where London Quietly Practices Being Sensible | A Suburban Satire of Kenley’s Calm Hills, Earnest Homes, and Unambitious Happiness