How's My Driving?

Is there anything you think I need work on? Let me know here! All comments screened - critique and suggestions welcome.

[The video turns on and it's just Tulio, sitting at a table, drumming his fingers on the wood and propping his chin up on one hand. He looks almost bored. Both his hands are black, there are roundish ears on top of his head, and he has a black mask across his eyes and nose, like this.]

[The finger-drumming stops for a second and he arches an eyebrow pointedly at the camera. Then the drumming starts up again for a few seconds before he reaches to turn the video off.]

I refuse to believe that there's no way to get up to some of these buildings with jumping on a bunch of goddamn balloons. I don't believe it.

You know what? I bet that's why these people were so excited to see newcomers. Watching idiots fall to their deaths must be a national pastime.

So.

Still stuck on a rock.

...

Yyyep.

Uh, we might have a slight issue regarding the whole Lupin-suddenly-disappearing...situation.

...Primarily in the fact that it turns out we don't know how to steer a boat.

Now, mind you, everything would have been fine if SOMEONE hadn't let her dog eat the instructions, but I'll reserve judgment until we're no longer marooned on a rock in the middle of the GODFORSAKEN OCEAN.

...

Right. I'm okay.

Heeey, Straw Hats? Look, I know we stole your silverware again, but I'm gonna need to call in a favor.

[The video clicks on, and at first there's only a clattering noise and a blur of color, as if the screen is being jostled around. Then, Tulio's face comes into view, so close to the camera that he's taking up the whole monitor.]

I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS.

[Suddenly, with another violent jostle, the view readjusts to reveal more of Tulio and, standing just over his shoulder, this guy. Tulio points frantically at the unmoving figure behind him, looking irate and panicked.]

How exactly did HE get HERE!? And look, look at this.

[He leans over for a moment, pops back up holding his shoe, turns around, and throws it as hard as he can at the apparition's head. It sails right through. Tulio turns back around and grips both sides of the monitor.]

See? SEE!? What the hell is this? Where did he come from? Why won't he go away!? He's been staring at me for over an hour!

[Tulio turns around, pointing as though to admonish the ghost, but before he can, Cortés takes a step forward. Tulio makes an exceptionally unmanly noise and lunges for cover, taking out the laptop with a flailing limb.]

OH, YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY, DO YOU? Ojalá que te pudras en el infierno, hijo de puta!

[From the laptop's place on the floor, you can see Cortés' feet taking another step. There's a scream and a scuffling sound that could be Tulio trying to stuff himself further under the table. An un-shoed foot accidentally kicks the screen, and the video ends abruptly.]

Who: Chel and Tulio
What: Plotting and excessive yet vaguely embarrassed sappiness
Where: The library of the Thousand Sunny
When: March 13th, the evening of the barbecue
Rating: ...PG-13 for possible implications?
Notes: References are made herein to a bet Chel and Tulio have going (Tulio has to convince Usopp he's actually a famous dread pirate and Chel has to convince Sanji she's secretly a man. Don't ask.) Also, your character did not read this.

( You calling me dangerous?Collapse )

...

On the one hand, I have to say: Really, universe? Really? This is how it's gonna be now? Bringing out the big guns, are we? Playing dirty? Touché.

On the other hand, this is so very par for the course that I almost can't complain. It's comforting, in a way; no matter how ridiculous things get, they can always get more ridiculous. Always something new to aspire to. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go lock myself in a room for a week.

Okay, this is a little late, but it has to be said.

I don't care how hungry you are: if there is any chance whatsoever that at any point during the day you will either A) ride an amusement park ride, either by choice or against or will, or B) board a ship that travels by launching itself through the air over the tops of pursuing Marine vessels, do not, I repeat, DO NOT eat any food sold to you by a man in a cart.

Especially corn dogs.

Just...just trust me on this.

Okay kids, good news/bad news time:

Good news first! You know that guy I've been looking for for months, Miguel? I found him! Well, Lupin found him; big thanks to his crew for not letting him drown.

Bad news: He has no idea who I am. Or who he is. ...Yeah.

Either way, we have to go pick him up. Now. If we can't do that, I can either try to arrange something with Lupin to have him dropped off or take the sub and go get him myself. But the "now" part is pretty vital.