An Honest Facade

I am an idealistic day dreaming procrastinator. I am a woman, married, bonded, happily soulfully attached to a man I love so much that I cry when I think about it. I'm over emotional, and moody, and sometimes I'm really defensive when I don't mean to be. Most of the time its because I wear my heart squarely on my sleeve, and even though sometimes that makes me so very sad, I wont put my heart into my pocket. I'd rather be hurt by the world over and over than be unable to experience the good with all of my being. I still exaggerate way too much in general conversation, though I am working on it. I rescue animals when I really shouldn't. I love animals to a fault, and I don't care if that bothers you. I don't care if you think its silly, or stupid, or that I have too many pets. I don't care, but it doesn't mean that I don't love you. I have always loved God, but up until recently he and I had been at odds. Now I feel that perhaps I owe a great debt to him. The thing I want most in the whole wide world is to be a mother, but I'm not sure my body is going to give me that, I'm not sure God is. I'm not angry, but I am determined to try. I think everyone has a destiny, even if they choose a different path. I refuse to be a realist if that means always thinking the worst. My favorite colors are blue and green, but I do love red, and orange. When I'm singing I feel like I know exactly who I am, and I am connected to God/people/life/the universe. Sometimes I'm bitchy, but its easy to woo me with a little bit of laughter and a glass of crystal light. Occasionally I'll find that I can actually be jealous, and sometimes its okay. I am weak and strong, and jealous and hardheaded. Sometimes I'm scared and sometimes I have the courage of lions. I'm not always right, but it doesn't always matter (after a few seconds of course). I am honest in a way that isn't always good for me, and sometimes I trust less than I thought I would be able to. I can be terribly judgmental, but always give 2nd/3rd/4th chances. I love and am loved. I believe and I struggle.

This is me. I am what I am, and I wont change for anyone but myself, and God.

Lyssiana [2:32 PM]: did I say enough?
akrazedone [2:33 PM]: You forgot to add that you're a terrific person and amazing writer because your friends say so.

*is loved*

Something from one of my first entries on LJ in 2001: "By the way, to someone who might be reading this, who cant do a live journal because they don't like the personal aspect: What I just wrote wasn't personal. I think that if anyone really tried, they would know it anyway."

"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

For anyone looking for my weight loss blog: http://scarletsimple.blogspot.com/

This is my recipe blog: http://unfattedfood.blogspot.com/

http://www.helpthehoneybees.com/




Myspace I Love You Graphics

"We are not afraid to entrust the American people with unpleasant facts, foreign ideas, alien philosophies and competitive values. For a nation that is afraid to let it's people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people." - John F. Kennedy









LISTEN TO THE MUSTN'TS

Listen to the MUSTN'TS, child,
Listen to the DON'TS
Listen to the SHOULDN'TS
The IMPOSSIBLES, the WON'TS
Listen to the NEVER HAVES
Then listen close to me-
Anything can happen, child,
ANYTHING can be.

-Shel Silverstein

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Extra Interests: baltimore city, tarot