Tag Archives: Journey

Journey

30 Day Challenge: Days 5 & 6

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“One decision changes your entire reality. But that one decision you have to make again and again and again–until it becomes natural to live in such a way.”

Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth, (201).

Yesterday and today were tough days. I found myself caught up in wishing things were a certain way, that this had been done, that I had already done that. I’m aware of it, though, and I suppose that’s something.

I found out my diploma was on hold, things I had already taken care of were showing, well, not-taken care of. Rather than arguing, I just went through the steps again, and I noticed I was a bit more detached.

Well, except for about five minutes when I was sitting in the middle of the USM lobby, right next to the Financial Aid office, talking to Mike about how useless the Financial Aid officers were and how I wish the Universe had decided to grace them with personalities and a modicum of talent that exceeded their ability to sit behind a desk and be decidedly unhelpful.

Um, yeah.

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Journey, spirituality

Sunday Something: Easter Rising

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My apologies to my Irish friends, but I couldn’t think of anything half as appropriate for a title.

Today was the Unity Easter Sunday service, and, heaven help us, we had Phil Jones there again. He’s giving another workshop tomorrow night, so I am beyond thrilled. Last year I both met him and the didgeridoo, and it was such an incredible experience. I made sure to tell him how much I enjoyed the workshop he gave from last year, and how pleased I was to see him again.

I was reading about last year’s Unity Easter Service, and I realized how much I’ve changed since then.

In some humorously surprising ways, actually. Reverend Dave read the Matthew version, and one of the first things that hit me was that the first person Christ appeared to was a woman. Mary Magdalene, actually. Not an “apostle” but a woman. Not really important for me personally, I don’t think, but with all this feminine awareness I have about me now, I thought it appropriate that I noticed it.

I’ll refrain from going all Sojourner Truth right about now and her opinion of men’s place with Christ, and get on to what I was really talking about.

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Journey

Independence Day

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“I’m dying!” I yelled at Sherry in a moment of utter thoughtless withdrawal a few weeks ago.

“No you’re not,” she shot right back.

Actually, I was. Just not in the way to which I was alluding. That night, 23 days ago, I smoked my last cigarettes back-to-back.

Nancy the smoker died on January 9, 2008. Nancy the non-smoker was reborn the next morning, full of phlegm and an insanely sore throat. I know that there’s a high relapse rate. I also know that I can never, ever have a single cigarette or a single puff of one or I will relapse. Because that’s the way I’m wired, for better or worse. The only way I’ll start smoking again is if I indulge in a behavior that I don’t want to do in the first place.

And despite the passing twinges, that’s exactly how it should be.

It took me over a year of really, really trying to quit to get to this point.

In about three months, I will be 34 years and one week old as I walk across the stage to get my pseudo-bachelor’s degree. I was thinking about that today and realized that I was close to hating myself for LITERALLY half my life for something that wasn’t even my fault.

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