I recently posted about how my own lights of clarity presented themselves, introducing me to the belief in another kind of existence. Though they were unquestionably pivotal moments, they were certainly not the first. My earliest memory of paranormal activity came when I was in college, and it came in three back-to-back occurrences.
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First, I was sitting in the computer room in my home when, from the hallway, I saw my mother’s husband quickly walk into the kitchen from the living room. I didn’t think anything of it and continued typing away, working diligently on an essay that was due for one of my college courses. A few minutes later, I saw him walk into the kitchen from the living room again. I called out and asked, “What are you doing?” He asked me if I was talking to him, and I replied “Yes, but you just did that.” He looked very confused. I then saw a flash in my mind of the first instance and realized that I saw a shadow quickly walk by that I assumed was him. I asked him, “Didn’t you just walk into the kitchen a few minutes ago. Did you forget something?” He looked bewildered and said that this was the first time that he walked into the kitchen all afternoon. I knew that I had not mistaken that I had seen someone pass by as I had not had any thought that anything paranormal would happen. Why would I? Nothing had ever happened before. This event perplexed me for a good while.
My second experience happened that same day. I woke up quite suddenly in the middle of the night, and my first thought was Why am I awake? Then I realized that I was not in darkness. I looked to my right and the light was coming from a faux candle that I had on a shelf. The strange thing about this was that to turn that light on, which ran on batteries, you had to twist the bottom portion of the “candle” all the way around, 360 degrees, for it to light up. I lay there realizing this fact, yet still assuming that it was nothing, until I began to feel a heaviness weigh on my body, which was so forceful that I could not move. I was terrified. I felt as though something was forcing me down, and I began to feel a dread like no other. I felt that there was some type of evil presence invading my bedroom for some reason, but I couldn’t get up to save my life. (Later, I learned that this could have been astral projection)
The following day everything seemed back to normal, and I brushed off the previous experiences as best I could. Until the last of the three occurrences, that is.
That night, I had a very vivid dream. It was the first time I could remember ever dreaming about my father who passed when I was six years old. I dreamed that it was the present time (while in college), and he came to my house to talk to me. My family let him in through the front door, without a word, clearly in shock. Somehow, we made our way into the computer room. I remember being absolutely flabbergasted that he was in my presence. I immediately asked if he was okay, over and over again, and he chuckled and nodded his head. That is when I began divulging every single thing I could think of, believing I had to give him every history of my past since he had died. I went on and on, even retelling things from my elementary school years. “Daddy, in the first grade, I was so terribly sick over you dying that my mom would let me stay home from school a lot, and my teacher was so nice about it. She would send home work, so I wouldn’t fall behind. Oh and Daddy, I did really well in school and graduated from high school, and I’m in college now, Daddy, and I will be graduating soon and Daddy, I have so many things to tell you!” I wasn’t giving him a chance to speak, and I was running out of breath. Suddenly, he tried to interrupt me with a big smile, and said, “Mi hija, I know.”
I stared at him in confusion and said, “Oh Daddy! And I have to tell you something. It’s big. I’m getting married! Daddy, I’m getting married!” Then, I paused. I stared into his eyes and realized what he was telling me. He revealed again that he knew. He knew everything! “You know?,” I asked with simultaneous excitement and confusion written in my wide eyes then furrowed brow.
He sat there in that room and explained to me that he knew everything and that there was no need for me to spend energy telling him of my every move and accomplishment because he knew. He told me that he was there for them all and that he was very proud of me. I began to cry and nervously asked, “So you know I’m getting married?”
He replied, “Of course, I know. I am very happy for you to have found someone so special to you.” His response was warm and heartfelt. He seemed genuinely joyous for my upcoming wedding. I felt a sense of relief wash over me. I had no idea, until that moment, that I needed to know that he knew I was getting married and, more importantly, that I had his blessing.
The entire time this was happening, my family was in the living room, whispering questions about what he was doing here if he had died. I kept seeing them looking in through the hallway and somehow felt so rushed the entire time as though at any moment my father would vanish into thin air. He, on the other hand, didn’t seem the slightest bit worried nor in a hurry. He was quite calm and at peace. I grudgingly asked if he knew my mom had remarried, and the answer was another yes. He seemed fine about it though my mother’s husband was in the other room quite perturbed, which was ridiculous to me. He was dead, I kept thinking. What was to fear?
I recall how I desperately wanted to bring my sister and mom into the room. Our entire visit was in the computer room, which was right next to my bedroom. (Only now as I write this out, do I realize over ten years later that it was the same room I was in during the first episode.) As I started motioning for them to come into the room, I saw them moving with some hesitation, and I excitedly turned to tell my father they were coming. That’s when he looked at me and said he loved me, smiled, and left me again.
When I woke up from that dream, I was in disbelief. Not that it was a dream but that it felt so unbelievably real. I shared my dream with my mom and fiance, at the time, as it left a huge impression on me.
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I include the third experience, even though I call it a dream, because I feel it was real. It was too extraordinary for it not to be. I know now that it was a message. In retrospect, I realize that these first experiences were my gift showing itself to me in various forms, and I suppose I was not open at the time to realize what was happening. I have been married now for twelve years. Why I am suddenly open now is still something I am trying to determine.
Posted in About Me
Lights of Clarity - My Path to Understanding 