Fellow Fallible Feline, isn’t it simply remarkable how some things that are meant to make one’s life easier has the opposite effect in the wrong hands? In my case, it’s the ‘scheduling’ feature of this blogging site. I’ve decided on making a commitment to blogging owing to its positive effects on my mental health—writing allows me to comprehend lingering issues from a healthier perspective if you know what I mean—if you know, you know—scheduling works with the structure of how ideas flock to me—a murder of clangorous crows come to call once in a while, taking turns to dangle me upside down from my ankles until I get dropped unceremoniously in the middle of a desert to suffer extreme deprivation alone and discontent.
Then there’s the darkness that sets in just before a post is about to go live—worsened by the fact that I’ve always known myself to be very bad with details, often getting chided for them as though I don’t take my work seriously enough to catch such ‘obvious and shouldn’t have seen daylight’ errors which is false—the nagging and debilitating stress of delivering subpar work measured by my very own standards prevents me from doing so—I’m talking about little things like alignments, forgetting to address (the correct) someone in the email, CC them or to complete a sentence *gasp*, change to correct date, not filling in the blanks, forgetting to attach (correct) files, grammatical errors such as was ->were, signing the darn letter, unnecessary words that I don’t even know why there were put there in the first place—basically errors that would have been obvious to most people except me! To add salt to the wound, the errors go unnoticed until I casually read them later on— and read like I’m not paying attention—FML. Everyone has their own demons to exorcise; this just happens to be mine. I’ll just have to learn overcome them, hopefully soon, before I turn 50 or something!
The pressure to check mounts until made absolutely certain that nothing daft my OCD can take as instrument of torture is said. That’s silly—believe me I know—considering no one can control how everyone else thinks and there will always be people who will find you detestable, no matter who you are— still difficult to make the best use of this veritable knowledge, let’s be honest. So the work gets checked until there’s no time anymore or it becomes too boring to read—probably because it’s been read as many times as cats clean themselves a day. With gritted teeth, it gets posted anyway for the simple reason that much is willingly endured in the expectation of improvements in life—at least that much I can do. Mental health is just as important as physical health; both require commitment to its improvement if not maintenance—persist I shall in staying committed to this mantra beyond paying lip service if I am to survive—heaven help me!
In other news, notified recently that I had won 2 1L cartons of oats and quinoa milk as well as a $25 voucher to be spent in a vegan cafe (local small business) through participation in a giveaway. The task was to simply describe my idea of a healthy breakfast which I did by detailing—there’s not much to detail anyway—how I prepare my 5 seconds ‘don’t give a silent fart about making this complicated’ kind of breakfast that I have had almost daily since I became more selective about the type of food I want to consume and how I want to spend my time.
This is the entry that got me selected if you’d like a laugh; to the very same people responsible for the 1L no sugar soy milk that I am fond of drinking straight from the carton—usually going for just a little above $4 for 2 cartons— won’t say which brand—if you know you know—kidding* it’s in the damn screenshot because I forgot to redact it and don’t feel like doing it now. Looking forward to trying the açai bowl and kombucha with my voucher and some vegan ice cream to go! Lucky, lucky.
The Incorrigible Kitten 