Last night was the first time in a while where I woke up in a panic. Sweat drenched my sheets, and my heart was pounding through my chest as if my soul was running from something. The moment passed and I feel better, but there are some topics that need to be addressed.

We had two of the worst wildfires in California history in the same week a few months ago. School shootings are on the rise, and the news continuously talks about how the world is going to shit 24/7. Maybe it’s all starting to get to me. Maybe my mind isn’t as strong as it used to be. Or maybe it’s just the sleeping pills the doctor gave me, which are having unintended side effects. 

At any rate, the nightmare I experienced seems to have been sparked by real world events, and my central nervous system was processing it all in unusual and anxiety inducing ways. At the core, it was a cybersecurity anarchy war. Hackers attacked the United States through Bluetooth creating chaos by targeting the delivery company that has the most access to our homes. They watch our every move. They tell us we’ll be safe. Yet, through a simple backdoor in the code, evil trolls made their way in.

So, how did we get here? 

It has been several years since writing down my creative thoughts and ideas. Before, it was a way to document moments in tech history – primarily riding the waves of virtual reality developments. It led into a budding freelance video production career; working with amazing and talented teams. We created 360-degree innovative experiences. I travelled the world, met celebrities, partied, and thoroughly enjoyed the ride. However, as time went on, the bubble burst, and the VR hype evaporated like smoke from a tobacco pipe. Instead of trying to engineer new systems, growing a construction company from a garage into an established firm is where the last several years of my life went. It was a stable job but nothing to rave about. 

Recently, I’ve been immersed in biotechnology labs. It’s strange, the things we focus on to feel in control. These days, for me, it’s protein modeling – complex, abstract, but somehow grounding. Now, after generating the 3D structure of a hypothetical transporter molecule encoded in the DNA from an Amazonian fungus that may be the key in the biodegradation of polyurethane, my fingers type vigorously as a way to bring myself back from the ethos of uncertainty. True researchers tackle the unknown, able to stand up for themselves and their ideas within total darkness – bringing light to those stuck in the day to day lives of just getting by. Although fear of an attack from digital malicious entities woke me up, the technology systems in places today are, for the most part, secure. With that said, we have been placing a lot of faith in large companies whose primary goals are really about aggregating wealth to select individuals and families steeped in oligarchy, despite them marketing themselves as for the people. 

In this dreamlike science fiction scenario, a loose collection of shadow hackers found their way into our delivery pipelines. The applications used by those who drop off billions of packages a year are linked to the doors of apartment complexes, providing access for those drivers so that trinkets and consumer products can pile up on the shelves collecting dust just because. It is who we are now. So bored with working, we need the dopamine fix of getting anything we want shipped to our homes in just 2 days. You can even get items the same day! It is convenient and safe if you look at it that way. Heading outside to buy something and having to look other people in the eye is annoying and uncomfortable sometimes, especially when we can put our feet up after working our asses off for someone who doesn’t really care about us. Still, it comes with a caveat that some might not see. 

Imagine if the technology wasn’t as encrypted as it is. Those delivery companies have databases of all the codes to our doors. They can be unlocked with the press of a button. The signals can be hijacked by devices like the Flipper Zero if used for the wrong reasons. The tech companies at the forefront of all of this have acquired the security cameras that we all use as well. For instance, that Ring doorbell you might have is attached to the walls of millions of other homes too. It is all interconnected, which is exciting – but kind of scary nonetheless. We’ve been promised more control of our homes and all the devices inside through the Internet-of-Things. Yet, trojan horses exist, and all it takes is one self-replicating computer virus made by ill-intended external forces to bring it all crashing down if the technological immune systems aren’t robust enough. 

We’ve been here before though. Issues of privacy and security are nothing new. Facebook, Google, and now Amazon have all had to prove themselves to us that they really have our best interests in mind. Of course they are in it for the money – and maybe even the fame. Hell, some of them just want the power. But, overall, our lives are better. We can communicate with our loved ones a lot easier. We can send gifts to each other in a moment’s notice. Our homes tell us if sketchy people are nearby, notifying the police if needed. It is safer than ever before despite what the media outlets say. The FBI stated on September 30, 2024 that murder rates have decreased in the US by 22.7% since the last year. Property crime is up in some cities though, however, it is down in others. San Francisco car break-ins are the lowest in two decades! 

Despite all this, public perception shows that we still feel unsafe and are a bit paranoid. It’s probably because we can now see all the horrendous things that occur throughout the world when we scroll through our phones on a day to day basis. You know this. Yet, we do it anyway. 

I, for one, just need a break. Maybe you do too. Instead of thinking of all the crazy shit going on, I’m going to head outside and hike the Angeles National Forest – breathing in the fresh air and listening to the birds chirp while the ground still smells faintly of ash. This is what works for me when it all feels too much. I’m sure you have your own ways to relax – and that’s all we can do. 

The world really is beautiful though – no matter what gets thrown at us. The fear doesn’t always disappear, but it does quiet down. There’s something about being out in nature away from the screens, away from the noise, that makes the chaos feel less urgent to me. Like the world might not end today after all!

As you can see, these are the technical landscapes that we have built – ones where convenience trumps security, and connection comes at a cost. It isn’t a question of what will come next anymore. Rather, it is has become whether or not the digital burnout is becoming too much to bear. If so, then reverting back towards more intrinsic rhythms is surely inevitable – balancing nature with technology. I’m already doing it. Will you?