Hmm..... turns out we're in June - when did that happen?! Anyways, *looks disgruntled* due to the sudden change in motnh, I'm late for my quotes list - I meant to do this last motnh, but then my computer wiped out all my files, so here we go:

LJ and FOD quotes

I want milk and oreos. (Porn and chocolate!)

Poor Fiona :(
Tell her she has a very pretty but EXTREMELY DIFFICULY name.

If someone were to write Sean Bean/Eric Bana, it would be called Beanana.

Today I forgot to wear my Shrek watch. It was a sad day in the life of I.

girlonthedock

inanutshell (2:35:34 PM): shop sticks?
inanutshell (2:35:44 PM): are those like... chop sticks with coupons on them?
inanutshell (2:36:36 PM): Hungry, but broke? Grab your oriental eating utensils and SAVE today!

scarred_dragon

15. What kind of bed do you sleep on?
The bedish sort... s'all beddy.

willowdancer

Just to keep things straight, be forewarned. This is a RANT. If you are not a fan of the RANT, or wish to spend your time on more constructive things than listening to me bitch, feel free to use this time to twiddle your thumbs or catch up on your sewing.

ibelieveinmagic

tounge: ttttttttalkoe ttttttttthce bto syyber

talking_toaster

yeah the chavs were kinda annoying but lets face it we kinda need chavs in later life otherwise we wouldnt have any toilet cleaners, binmen, mcdonalds workers, bigissue sellers and all the prisons would be empty so the prison workers and police would be unemployed. so really we need them if u think about it and they do have their uses.

Jen


April Quotes - school (mainly English!)

They give you crap education so you're thick!

You got something wrong inside your trousers?

You know what black people are like, there's no woman around so they'll find a monkey. Taking the piss out of scientist's original explanation for AIDs

No Wales! That'd be a real loss, eh?!

It would all have been a real mess if we hadn't invented the wheel!

'What do you want to do when you leave school?'
'I'd like to be an International Terrorist.'
'Oh yeah, very good job prospects... you need five Highers for that, though..'

Jim, our English teacher

I've seen animal porn before!

Scott

'Did he fall out of the ugly tree and get hit by every branch?'
'No, he fell out of the ugly tree, landed on the ugly trampoline, and bounced right back up!'

Bobby

You piece of Haggis!

French person trying to insult a Scottish person

I thought we were failing! You know stuff! That's not the criteria of failing!

miss_ani

...her ass exploded and she got third degree burns!

Cara

She [French teacher] gave us sport a gogo, so I looked up gogo, and it means sucker. I don't know what kind of sport she was talking about!

Jude

We have muck-up day tomorrow. We're going to trash things that are valuable and/or important.

Alice

Sooo, had my last exam yesterday – that means I’m now freeeeeeee til Monday – so what do I do? Get my hair cut then sit all day on Quizilla. Score ONE for the common people!

( QuizzlesCollapse )

One sunny day in 2005 an old man approached the White House from across Pennsylvania Ave, where he'd been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the US Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine looked at the man and said, "Sir, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides here."

The old man said, "Okay" and walked away.

The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the same Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush." The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides here." The man thanked him and, again, just walked away.

The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same US Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said, "Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Bush. I've told you already that Mr. Bush is no longer the president and no longer resides here. Don't you understand?"

The old man looked at the Marine and said, "Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it."

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow, Sir."