zqueenable

The next day dawned bright and sunny, as if to wipe away the memory of the cyclone. Fortunately, nothing much had been harmed apart from the trees. Myungsoo went to the train station first thing in the morning to change his train ticket and bring back his luggage. He had gladly accepted the offer of Mr. and Mrs. Lee, Sungjong’s parents, to spend a week at their house. They were so glad that Sungjong had made a new friend that they were reluctant to let him go. It was pretty obvious Sungjong had taken to Myungsoo since they saw the pair hand in hand going around the house after they had snacked together.

Myungsoo, on the other hand, felt that he needed to get to know Sungjong really well. Even though Sungjong had practically recited his biography at the first chance he got, Myungsoo wanted to know him even deeper, to the bottom of his heart.

After breakfast, Myungsoo asked Sungjong to show him around. Sungjong was very excited at the prospect but to Myungsoo’s utter annoyance, he insisted on bringing Dingdong along.

“You have me now, you don’t need Dingdong,” Myungsoo pointed out.

“Excuse me but I don’t throw away old friends when I get new ones like you Seoul people,” Sungjong said somewhat coldly but try as he might, he couldn’t act all rude and offended. No, the seed of warmth was too well planted in him.

They walked around the village under the shady trees and after lunch, they went to the lake to fish. While walking and fishing, Sungjong talked non-stop. Myungsoo was not irritated, it was enchanting to hear his sweet voice drone on and on but it bothered him that Sungjong opened up to strangers too easily.

He will get hurt. He’s practically looking for trouble.

“Sungjong-ah,” Myungsoo called.

“Hmm?” Sungjong asked looking up from his fishing rod.

“What if some bad guys try to hurt you or steal you?” Myungsoo asked looking into his eyes.

“My mom says that everyone in the world is protected by either someone on earth or someone in heaven. And besides, I have a secret weapon. I might tell you about it one day.” He spoke seriously, not blinking even once. Flashing Myungsoo an innocent smile, he went back to his fishing rod.

Myungsoo kept staring at him—half curious, half in love.

Myungsoo spent the rest of the week sticking to Sungjong closely. He felt ashamed that he was competing with Dingdong for Sungjong’s attention. They were neck to neck throughout the day but Myungsoo won at night, when they retired to their beds in Sungjong’s bedroom. Needless to say, Myungsoo had insisted on sharing Sungjong’s room even though there were guest bed rooms in the house.

If it was possible, he was growing even more curious about Sungjong. He had been taken to a lot places, surrounding villages and the closest town, by Sungjong and Dingdong. Of course his most favorite trip was that to the town, where Dingdong couldn’t accompany them. Myungsoo was immensely pleased when Mr. Lee refused to give Sungjong permission to take Dingdong to town. At the same time, he considered seriously if he was becoming crazy.

I shoot murderous glares at a cow! Why am I acting like a jealous lover? And why can’t I figure out Sungjong? He has to be the simplest human I’ve ever met but why can’t I understand him?

Myungsoo went to sleep that weekend even more curious and a little bit more in love.

zqueenable

They reached Sungjong’s house, which turned out to be a large farmhouse with chicken, goats and sheep running around all over the place. Sungjong introduced me to his parents and took me up to his room. When he excused himself to change I realized I had left my bag on the train. I told this to Sungjong, who had returned with sandwiches and milk on a tray.

“But you can’t go back for it now. The cyclone’s due any moment,” he said, handing me the glass of milk.

“Really?” I asked him, raising an eyebrow.

“Why not? This is very pure. Our own farm’s cow’s milk,” he said proudly.

“B-but I’m 20.”

“You’re never too grown up to drink milk,” said Sungjong and sipped milk from his own glass, giving himself a white moustache. Myungsoo laughed out loud. When Sungjong looked at him enquiringly, he said, “I want to check your I.D. I can’t take your age seriously.”

Sungjong pretended to be offended but fell back to telling Myungsoo all about himself. He had left school that year. Their village provided no further education. He wanted to go to college in Seoul but since he was an only child, his parents didn’t want to let him go. He was also hesitating because he didn’t want to leave behind Dingdong, who was his best friend. They had enough money so he could easily spend the rest of his life doing nothing. He had few friends apart from Dingdong, the main reason being he was never good in sports. He always got picked last for any game and was substituted frequently. When he was done babbling all about himself he looked at Myungsoo and said, “So what about you?”

“What?” Myungsoo questioned back.

“I just told you all about myself. Your turn.”

“I’m just a normal person.”

“And?”

“That’s it. Oh and I hate cows.”

“Why?”

“Cows are evil. They take chance of the innocence of little boys and cast them under spells so that they can destroy their lives in old farmhouses,” Myungsoo said mockingly.

“Really?” Myungsoo looked Sungjong in the eyes. He had actually believed him.

This boy is too innocent for his own good. He needs constant taking care of.

“Sungjongie, do you really not want to go to Seoul?”

“I want to but Dingdong will be so lonely. And I’ll miss my parents.”

“But you can visit them during vacations.”

“Yes but Dingdong can’t even stay a day without me.”

“That stupid cow doesn’t matter!” Myungsoo got irritated and unknowingly raised his voice.

“T-that s-stupid c-cow!” Sungjong looked appalled and without warning, tears started running down his cheeks. “He’s m-my b-best friend. My o-only friend.”

“I’m sorry Sungjong, I didn’t mean it,” said Myungsoo, trying to stop him from crying. But the tears didn’t stop and Myungsoo—thinking of the one thing his mother does to console someone—hugged him. His arms wrapped around Sungjong’s thin body and he pulled his face into his chest. He gently patted Sungjong’s hair and said, “Sshh, don’t cry baby.” Mentally, he vituperated himself for calling Sungjong a baby but Sungjong didn’t protest. Myungsoo could feel Sungjong slowly calming down in his grasp. Before long, the sound of crying subsided and Sungjong hiccupped. Myungsoo let him go and handed him the glass of milk.

“There you go,” he said with a small smile, wiping off the lingering tears from his eyes. Sungjong drank all the milk in one go and then sat silently, looking at the floor. Myungsoo resisted the urge to brush off Sungjong’s milk moustache. But at that instant, he decided.

zqueenable

Pride stopped Myungsoo from going back. Yes, pride was the only thing standing between him and his one chance at redemption. He thought his pride was too precious for him to say sorry but not until he walked away, far away, did he realize that he had lost someone at the expense of something which he valued too less to care about now.

If he was given another life, at another time, he would definitely not make the same mistake. Not twice. No, thrice. Yes, he had done it before and was forgiven without even asking. The gentle heart simply forgave him, no questions asked, no charges pressed. But this time, even he couldn’t forgive himself. When he remembered Sungjong’s tear-stained face, eyes so red as if they were bleeding, he had the sudden urge to run in front of the next car and cleanse the world of an evil heart.

“Sungjongie,” was the only explanation he had offered. Sungjong had turned away from him.

“You have nothing to say, do you?” he had asked through his tears. His voice had sounded like a mess of emotions and regrets, anger and hatred. Emotion because Sungjong still loved him, regret because Sungjong knew the end was looming but he didn’t want it to end, anger at himself because Sungjong didn’t confront him earlier and let it happen behind his back, hatred at Myungsoo because of all the broken promises and false kisses, the phony hugs and the fake reassurances

Myungsoo had stayed silent. He didn’t even look at Sungjong’s face. Because if he had, he wouldn’t have been able to turn away and slam the door, blocking Sungjong and his tears. Once the door blocked Sungjong from him, he ran away. Ran along the stairs until he was out into the blue night. Then he ran along the sidewalk. He ran like there was no tomorrow.

He had stopped when his legs faltered. No, he didn’t stop because he was short of breath or because his heart was thumping too fast. Both his heart and breath had stopped when he had seen Sungjong crying. He had actually seen Sungjong cry before because he was that kind of a person. He made Sungjong cry and relish in his power. I can make him cry.

But this time he had seen the finality in Sungjong’s eyes which his tears couldn’t obstruct. “Your only chance,” the eyes seem to say.

“I’m sorry, I really am. And I love you.” That’s what he opened his mouth to say but no words escaped. Instead he ran away.

“Because I’m proud and I’m too much of a fool to sacrifice my pride,” Myungsoo said to himself.

“No, you’re not proud. You’re just a coward. You’re the lamest excuse for a lover. Your excuse is that you’re proud but you have nothing to be proud of. You could have been proud if you had protected your love and didn’t let it fade. But you let it all go because you’re a coward. When you truly love someone, nothing stands in your way—not pride, nothing.”

He heard the words, as if someone colder and more callous than him uttered them.

“You’re pitiable.” The voice said before fading.

“I’ll die a proud man!” Myungsoo screamed. He screamed for the air to hear, the dust, the dirt. “But I’ll die with the one I love beside me.”

He started running again. This time the destination was etched in his mind. If it was possible, he would have run faster than the wind. When he reached the door he dreaded to knock on, he felt his heart falter a bit. His hand stalled midway. He couldn’t bring himself to knock on the door. But as if his mind had willed it, the door flew open and Sungjong stood there.

“I thought I heard something,” he mumbled. But Myungsoo knew it to be otherwise. Sungjong could always tell when Myungsoo was at the door. He had developed a kind of intuition about Myungsoo. “I know you want to take away your things so I have them in a box.”

Sungjong’s face looked bloated. But that face gave Myungsoo the strength. He pulled Sungjong roughly towards him and kissed his lips. And that was the spark. All his boundaries broke down and he cried. Cried like he had never done, and no one ever would catch him crying like that again. Sungjong’s lips didn’t move against his and his arms pushed against his chest but he managed to say, “Sorry Sungjongie, I love you,” in the kiss. Sungjong froze. When had Myungsoo last told him that? Never.

“Coward,” Sungjong’s lips moved. “Stupid, idiot, crazy—”

“Crazy for you,” said Myungsoo as he deepened the kiss. They had the rest of the conversation in the living room, in between kisses and hugs. In a long time Myungsoo felt truly proud. Proud that he had chosen correctly his other half.

zqueenable

Woohyun woke up early the next morning. For him, Parents’ Day at school was always special. All the teachers were fond of him and gushed out praises to his father. It gave Woohyun a calm pleasure to see the slightly proud smile on Mr. Nam’s face when he saw his son’s brilliant results.

Aaargh, the owl’s still sleeping.

Even though Sungyeol’s leg had been on Woohyun’s torso for the better part of the night, he had slept more peacefully than he had in a long time. He pushed Sungyeol away from him, catching him at the last moment as he threatened to fall off the edge of the bed.

Get up! Why can’t you take care of yourself? Is it because you have too many people to take care of you?

There was knocking at their door. Sungyeol squirmed within the blanket, which meant he was awake.

Good thing Sungyeol is not a log-sleeper like Dongwoo hyung!

“Woohyunnie, get up. Sungyeolie you too. It’s a big day,” Mr. Nam boomed loudly as he knocked furiously.

“We’re up, appa,” said Woohyun, getting up to open the door. Sungyeol ending up in Woohyun’s bedroom was so common that Mr. Nam had taken it for granted that the boys were sleeping together.

“I’m hungry,” Sungyeol said suddenly.

“That’s the first thing you say after you wake up, you fatty,” Woohyun said.

“Shut up. I’m not fat!” Sungyeol denied.

“Woohyun, be nice to Sungyeol,” Mr. Nam said. “And boys get ready. We have to go to the school right away.”

“Er thanks but I’m going home. I don’t want to pick up my results. I’ll send Jungmin hyung for them,” Sungyeol said hesitantly.

“Oh nonsense,” said Mr. Nam. “Don’t worry, they know I’m friends with your dad. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if I collect your report card.”

Sungyeol looked stumped. He looked at Woohyun and then turned towards Mr. Nam, turning bright red in the face.

“It’s ok, Mr. Nam,” he mumbled. “I’m pretty sure the teachers don’t have much to say about me. Woohyun must have won a lot of awards. You should enjoy that.”

“Oh Sungyeollie, I’ll be glad to collect your report card,” Mr. Nam smiled brightly at him.

“Umm, Mr. Nam I can’t go to school in these clothes. And my school uniform from yesterday is spoiled thanks to your son. I have to go and change.”

“Yeah, let him go dad. You want to see his report card? It’s full of more zeroes you can count in a day like always,” said Woohyun, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Woohyun, manners, Sungyeollie, please,” said Mr. Nam with a smile and left the room. Woohyun let out a frustrated sigh.

“Give me back my clothes Woohyun,” Sungyeol demanded.

 “Oh please as if I want them,” said Woohyun, throwing the clothes at Sungyeol. “I’m going to change now.”

The boys dressed, throwing insults at each other now and then until Mr. Nam arrived and scolded both of them. They then had breakfast with Mr. Nam. Although Mr. Nam had always been very kind to Sungyeol, this was the first time he was actually going to collect his report card as his guardian so he was slightly apprehensive.

When they were all set to go, Dongwoo ran out of his room and hugged Woohyun, fully dressed.

“Where do you think you’re going hyung?” asked Woohyun.

“Of course to see all the awards my cute dongsaeng has won this year,” Dongwoo pouted.

“Let him come, Woohyun,” said Mr. Nam.

“When does anyone ever listen to my wishes!” fumed Woohyun. “I can’t believe I’m going to the Parent meeting with two people I wouldn’t be caught dead with!”

“Don’t worry Woohyunnie, I’ll take Dongwoo hyung with me. I’ll tell everyone he’s my hyung,” said Sungyeol.

“Yay, Sungyeollie, you’re sooooooooooo adorable! I wuv you!” Dongwoo shouted and grasped Sungyeol, knocking off his breath.

“Or not,” muttered Sungyeol, quietly enough so that only Woohyun could hear him before packing into Mr. Nam’s car after Dongwoo.

zqueenable

“Hyung, I’m sorry for this, you wanted to go somewhere else right?” Sungjong croaked. He was lying against the soft cushions on the back seat of Sungyeol’s limo.

“Erm…no it’s ok. What would you like to eat Sungjong?” asked Sungyeol kindly.

When they were waiting for the limo to show up at the café, Myungsoo had taken him aside and said, in a grave voice, “Look I know you don’t have the best feelings for Sungjongie in the world but do this for me, ok? Take him home, buy him something to eat, he looks like he’s starving and then tell him to sleep. Just do this much and then you can go find Woohyun. Please.” He almost had tears in his eyes.

Sungyeol couldn’t say no to that. And besides, he was feeling sorry for Sungjong. He might not be the most sensitive person alive but he couldn’t look away or make fun of Sungjong when he looked so helpless.

Sungjong didn’t reply which made Sungyeol sigh, “It’s ok Sungjongie, you can think of me like your brother.”

Sungyeol didn’t mind that he had no siblings. He had never wanted one. Even if he had one, he wouldn’t win any ‘Best Brother’ awards.

It’s better this way. I don’t need any more people who can abandon me and hurt me in the process.

Sungyeol could never fully forgive his parents for leaving him alone. Sometimes he felt grateful though, especially when he saw how worried Myungsoo would be before Parent’s Day. And Woohyun always had to be home by 9 pm on week days. Sungyeol was a free bird. His tutor, Jungmin, would call 5 times a day though, but he hardly had any control over him. However, he would sometimes be overwhelmed by his freedom. Sometimes, he wished his mother would scold him for going to watch a movie on school night and his father would want to know why he had failed Chemistry.

In truth, Sungyeol never tested Jungmin’s patience to the highest extreme. He would laugh and tell Jungmin it was because he felt bad for him.

“You’re an old man and I have pity for your poor nerves. If I go too wild you may have a heart attack,” Sungyeol would tell Jungmin playfully. However his reasons were completely different.

What if he leaves me as well? He’s not even related to me…If he leaves, I’ll truly become alone in this world. Except for Myungsoo and Howon, of course. And…Woohyun.

By the time, they reached Howon and Sungjong’s apartment, Sungjong was fast asleep. Sungyeol gently nudged him to wake him up. He looked embarrassed that he had fallen asleep and apologized profusely for failing to answer any questions Sungyeol might have asked him.

“It’s ok, you were tired,” said Sungyeol, after ordering his chauffeur to bring pizza and Pepsi for them.

“Hyung, there’s no need—”

“Oh shut up, let’s go inside, it’s freezing.”

Woohyun had lost track of time. He had thought of leaving before it was dark, but darkness came so soon. Usually, the sky would turn pale first and then a pink shade before darkness took over but today it came all at once. One moment, the sky was bright and blue, the next moment, he couldn’t see anything. The wind picked up until it was positively howling in his ears. He shivered.

I think I should go now.

He stood up tentatively and immediately looked behind. There was nothing but a solid block of darkness. His throat was parched and he felt a tingling sensation on his skin. He could barely make out the outline of the tombstone in front of him. The flowers he had placed on the gravestone seemed to have shrunk. 

Oh God, I’ll never get out of this place.

He gulped down the saliva forming in his mouth and took a step. He felt a thousand pair of eyes on him.

All right, I have one chance. I got to get out of here alive.

Taking a deep breath, he started to run. He didn’t even stop when he kicked loose gravel or stones off the path or ran into tombstones. He had closed his eyes, not that they were any help open. He felt a painful bump rise on his forehead as he ran into a lamp post.

Aargh, oh please let me not die here. I don’t even know which way’s out. Wait, what was that sound?

He thought he had heard the crunch of gravel, somewhere close to him.

“Who’s there?” he whispered inaudibly. He felt a figure dart past him through the darkness.

Wait is that a—

He knew very well even as he opened his mouth to scream that he wouldn’t make it. Surely enough, before he could move another muscle, something grabbed him from behind. The grasp was strong and he felt his breath was knocked out from his lungs. He saw stars in front of his eyes.

This is it. I’m coming, eomma. Now I can be with you. I don’t have to be scared of losing anyone anymore.

“Yah, if you faint now, I won’t carry you home!” The voice was rude.

Lucifer, is that you? Boy, this is one cranky demon…

“Didn’t you hear me, you idiot? Stop shaking!”

Only if the pain stopped. But why does Lucifer sound so familiar?

“Hey what’s wrong with you? Do you want me to leave you here?”

 “C-can’t b-breathe,” spluttered Woohyun.

“Oh, my bad.”

Woohyun was released from the tight grasp and he fell to the floor on all four. His hands moved towards his tie to untie it as he gasped.

“Are you alright?” Someone sat down beside him and patted him on the back. It was several minutes before he answered.

“What are you doing here, you obscenely tall owl?” Woohyun croaked.

“That’s nice Woohyun, you’re going to win awards for your politeness. Need I remind you, I just saved you from the perils of a haunted graveyard?” Sungyeol said in a snobby voice as he helped Woohyun up.

“I didn’t need any help and this graveyard is not haunted!” said Woohyun in an unnecessarily loud voice.

“No of course not, you were just running from tooth fairies,” said Sungyeol snidely. “What is a blind guy doing here at night, not to mention alone?”

“You know what I’m doing, and I’m not blind.”

“No you’re just night-blind. Now let’s get out of here before the Grim Reaper comes for our heads.”

“T-t-the G-grim Reaper? He’s not even real,” Woohyun said but he ended his sentence in a questioning tone as if he didn’t believe in what he had just said.

“Sure, that’s what you think. Now come on.” Sungyeol pulled on Woohyun’s shirt.

The eerie crunching of gravel beneath their feet made Woohyun glance sideways nervously, as if waiting for something to jump on him. Unknowingly, he had clutched tightly at Sungyeol’s arm. Sungyeol rolled his eyes and tried to find his way through the maze of gravestones. He stopped in front of the grave where Woohyun was earlier sitting and cautiously dropped a bunch of roses, which fell on top of Woohyun’s bouquet. Hearing Sungyeol stop, Woohyun said nervously, “What are you doing?”

“Nothing, you weirdo. Come on, we’re almost there,” Sungyeol replied. He hastily bowed in front of the grave and then pulled Woohyun away towards the exit. At that moment, an owl screeched in a nearby tree.

“Aaargh!” Woohyun screamed and jumped onto Sungyeol. Sungyeol was not prepared and as he felt a pair of arms eagerly grasping his neck, he started and tried to jerk him off. This made Woohyun grab his neck even tighter as he hung from Sungyeol, his legs in the air. Sungyeol knew he couldn’t extricate the figure from him, so he just stopped moving and glared at Woohyun’s face, which was hidden in his chest. After a few minutes, Woohyun mumbled, ‘Is it gone?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about but I would like my neck back please,” said Sungyeol grumpily.

When Woohyun realized the state he was in, he quickly jumped to the ground. His head hung low, he said, “Let’s go.”

“About time,” sighed Sungyeol and took Woohyun’s hand. “You’re more pain than you’re worth.”

They walked silently for the rest of the way. When they were out of the graveyard, Sungyeol didn’t drop Woohyun’s hand; Woohyun didn’t seem to mind. They kept on walking as if they had decided on their destination before. Suddenly, Sungyeol’s phone started to ring. He fished it out of his pocket and looked at the caller I.D.

“Myungsoo,” Sungyeol said cheerfully. “I did exactly what you told me to. Sungjong’s safe and sound.”

Woohyun looked up curiously. He wondered what had happened to Howon’s kid brother.

“No, of course not. Yeah, go check on him. Howon’s with you right? Ok then, see you tomorrow at school.”

Woohyun didn’t understand what Sungyeol was talking about and was very confused when he said after a pause, “Yeah, right where he was supposed to be.”

 The silence didn’t break until Sungyeol walked through the main gate and stopped in front of the house. Not bothering to look at Woohyun, he rapped loudly on the door. Woohyun’s head snapped up as the door was flung open and a teenage boy, a year older than them, gasped loudly.

“Woohyunnie! Where have you been? Appa was so worried!” Without waiting for an answer he ran into the house screaming, “Appa, Woohyunnie’s back! He wasn’t kidnapped! He’s alive! He wasn’t taken by Lord Voldemort.”

“Ah, that Dongwoo hyung,” muttered Woohyun.

“Hasn’t changed much, that Dongwoo hyung,” said Sungyeol, smiling. “What are you waiting for? Do you want to stay outside forever?”

Woohyun made a face and followed Sungyeol inside.

Look who’s giving the orders. This is my house.

“Woohyun.”

Dongwoo returned with a middle-aged man in tow. He resembled Woohyun very much, except that his pitch black hair was in the process of turning grey.

“Appa,” Woohyun said as he looked at Mr. Nam. “I’m sorry, I lost track of time and…”

“I found him almost crying out because he thought there were ghosts,” said Sungyeol with a wide grin. “You should have seen his face!”

“Was his face like this?” asked Dongwoo. He scrunched up his face until he couldn’t be even recognized as a human and made a loud wailing noise that has never been heard from any sort of animal. Sungyeol was thrown off guard as he stared while Woohyun shook his head disapprovingly. Mr. Nam looked mildly amused but seeing that Woohyun was feeling embarrassed, he said, “Stop it Dongwoo. You’re embarrassing your brother.”

Dongwoo’s face returned to normal but the look of shock didn’t leave Sungyeol’s face. Seeing that, Woohyun said, “Aargh, he’s not my brother.” He then stormed off towards his room.

“Why does he have to embarrass me like that?” fumed Woohyun. “I wish I didn’t have a brother like him. He slammed his bedroom door.

In fact, I almost didn’t have him. I wonder if it would have been really possible to live if he didn’t turn up—one less people to lose.

 Dongwoo was Woohyun’s step-brother. Woohyun’s mother had been married to a wealthy businessman before. After he died, Mr. Nam, being the generous man he was, accepted Dongwoo and his mother in his life. Woohyun had grown up thinking Dongwoo was his real brother until he was old enough to realize the significance of the difference in surnames between him and Dongwoo.

Woohyun changed into comfortable clothes and was about to go to sleep when someone knocked on his door.

“Dinner, Woohyunnie. Can’t go to sleep without it,” Dongwoo said.

“I don’t want to eat.”

Even as he said it, he opened the door because he knew his father wouldn’t let him go to bed hungry.

When he came to the dining room, he was shocked to see Sungyeol sitting beside Mr. Nam and chatting with him. He knew this would happen. Mr. Nam never let Sungyeol leave without a meal. Yet it didn’t stop him from making a surly expression as he made his way towards the table.

“Yes Sungyeol, your father was always the smart one. I was so glad that he was my friend. He got me out of the tight spots,” Mr. Nam was enthusiastically telling Sungyeol. “Oh, Woohyun, we were waiting for you,” he added to Woohyun.

“Hurry up, you lazy butt, I’m dying of hunger,” Sungyeol said, picking up his spoon.

“What is he doing here?” Woohyun pointed at Sungyeol, knowing the answer quite well.

“It’s rude to point Woohyun,” said Mr. Nam. “And you should thank him for bringing you home. You acted very rashly today and if he hadn’t guessed where you were and didn’t turn up—”

“Ok, I get it. You can finish dinner and then get the hell outta here.” Even as he said it, he knew that his father would as always ask Sungyeol to stay. He took his seat because he knew there was no point in arguing with his father. Mr. Nam liked Sungyeol too much since he resembled his father, Mr. Lee, who was his childhood friend. Throughout dinner, Woohyun remained silent while Mr. Nam, Dongwoo and Sungyeol chatted on.

 After dinner, Woohyun was going straight to bed when something that his father said made him stop and whirl around.

“What do you mean by he’s staying here?” he demanded.

Duh, he’ll ask him to stay. Oh please say ‘no’, you stupid owl…

“It’s too late to go home. So take Sungyeol to your room and give him something of yours’ to change into—” Another dialogue Woohyun heard more often than it suited him.

“Andwe!” he cut across his father. “There’s no way he’s staying here. Go back to your stupid mansion.”

“It’s okay, featherhead, you don’t have to give me your clothes. I know they’ll be too short for me anyway,” said Sungyeol snidely.

“I’m not sharing rooms with you,” said Woohyun flatly.

His father looked at him reproachfully, “Woohyun—”

“It’s ok appa, he can sleep in my room like always,” offered Dongwoo.

“No, he’s leaving right now!” Woohyun glared at Sungyeol.

Sungyeol smiled evilly. “Thanks Dongwoo hyung. I’m really scared of the dark so I shouldn’t go home now.”

Woohyun clenched his fist and said, “Fine! Do whatever you want. I’m going to sleep.”

He sometimes wondered why Sungyeol agreed to stay overnight as his house. He was definitely not afraid of the dark and he could call for his limo any time.

Maybe he just wants to torture me.

“Come Sungyeol, let’s sleep,” said Dongwoo, ushering him towards his room. Sungyeol wished Mr. Nam a good night and followed Dongwoo, winking at Woohyun.

Woohyun lay awake on his bed. Although he was tired to the bones, he couldn’t sleep. He knew that one other person under the same roof was also awake.

That stupid Sungyeol! Why did he have to stay? He can’t sleep anywhere properly apart from his home, he knows that well. He’ll be awake the whole night. And who can sleep with Dongwoo hyung beside them? He snores! He knows all of this and still he stayed. Does he do that simply to annoy me? I wish I could kick him out of the house right now!

Woohyun turned to his side and saw the moonlight filtering in through his window. He bit his lips.

Aargh, it’s no good.

He sat up in his bed. Cursing himself inwardly, he put on his slippers and tiptoed out of his room. Dongwoo slept like a log of wood but Mr. Nam was a very sensitive sleeper. Woohyun was careful not to disturb Mr. Nam’s sleep and not being as clumsy as Dongwoo,  he managed to reach Dongwoo’s bed room noiselessly while shooting nervous glances towards Mr. Nam’s bed room.

Thank God hyung sleeps with his door open.

He pushed the door inward and the little creak alerted Sungyeol that he wasn’t the only one awake. He knew it could only be Woohyun and pretended to be asleep under his covers.

“Look, I’m not stupid,” said Woohyun quite loudly when he reached the bed. He knew nothing could wake Dongwoo up. “Get up and come with me.”

He waited for two minutes before Sungyeol got up and followed him to his bed room. Once inside, Woohyun took out a pair of sweat pants and a T-shirt from his wardrobe and threw them at Sungyeol.

Sungyeol immediately pulled off his school uniform and changed. He had known that Woohyun

would save him from Dongwoo’s snores at one point. He was happy that Woohyun came to his senses before any permanent damage occurred to his ear drums.

“You could have asked Dongwoo hyung for some clothes. You know you feel uncomfortable in the school uniform,” Woohyun muttered.

“Yes I know,” Sungyeol said. “But Dongwoo hyung is even shorter than you so…”

Woohyun sat down on his bed and asked, “How did you know where to find me?”

Sungyeol jumped onto the bed which made a loud creaking noise.

So Woohyunnie is not in the mood for a little fight. Too bad, it would have been fun.

Grabbing Woohyun’s pillow he said, “The same way you knew I was awake.”

Woohyun made a ‘tsk’ noise, certainly not happy with the answer. He made to take away his pillow from Sungyeol’s clutches but he turned around from Woohyun with the pillow.

“I did forget in the morning but then I suddenly remembered it was your oemma’s death anniversary,” Sungyeol said after some time.

Woohyun remained silent. Sungyeol continued, “You didn’t have to leave school. You could have gone there after school over. You could have asked Myungsoo and Howon. They would have been glad to accompany you. They do it every year. I go with you every year. You could have gone with your appa and Dongwoo hyung in the morning before school. Why did you have to do it alone?”

“I was missing her. And I didn’t want to share her with anyone. Not even Dongwoo hyung or appa. For all I know, I might lose them someday as well. And you people as well.”

“Isn’t that what we’re all scared of? Being alone?”

“Is it? I thought it’s just me.”

“Nope, happens to me all the time.”

Woohyun didn’t protest because he knew Sungyeol, of all the people, would know how he felt.

Howon had accepted his fate but for some reason, we can’t. We keep fearing and hiding and fearing…

“That reminds me, I didn’t tell Jungmin hyung I was going to spend the night here. He must be worried sick. He has been calling since school ended and I didn’t pick up once. And now my battery has run out.”

“You can use mine if you want.”

“Nah, I’ll just explain everything to him tomorrow. He might have called Myungsoo and found out anyways.”

“He likes Myungsoo a lot.”

“He likes everyone more than me.”

“That’s not true. You know that.”

“So, what are you going tell the sunsaengnims? About running away?”

“I don’t know.” Woohyun stifled a yawn. “What happened to Sungjong by the way?”

Sungyeol sighed and turned around to face Woohyun. “He was sick earlier. I had to take him home from the café.”

“Is he going to be ok?” Woohyun sounded worried.

“Yeah, Myungsoo’s all over him I assure you. In a good way, I mean.”

“Then he’ll be fine. And then there’s Howon. What about tomorrow though? Your parents are coming?”

“Nope,” said Sungyeol, yawning. “Wake me up early tomorrow, ok?”

“Do I look like your personal butler?” scoffed Woohyun.

“No, you look like a very disgruntled Nam Woohyun.”

“Good, that means I’m back to my senses. So I’ll go to sleep now.”

There was no response.

“Fine sleep then, if you can.” Woohyun was about to turn around when Sungyeol moved.

“Yah, yah, don’t put your feet up on me,” Woohyun shouted. “Stay away from me I said. Aargh, move your giant leg.”

Woohyun was trying to push Sungyeol off but then realized he was asleep already.

He groaned, “Aargh, Sungyeol, this is why I don’t want to sleep with you. You should have gone home.”

zqueenable

“Where’s Woohyun?” inquired Myungsoo, peeping into their homeroom. All the girls started whispering at their sight and some giggled, blushing and falling over each other. Sungyeol and Myungsoo, thoroughly used to this, ignored all the drama and went to sit on their seats at the back of the class, those of Howon and Woohyun still empty beside them.

“Where’s Howon?” asked Singyeol but as he said so, his eyes glanced over Woohyun’s desk.

“Don’t know,” Myungsoo said with a yawn. “Playing soccer maybe.” Myungsoo slid into his seat lazily, pulling Sungyeol by his cuff and making him sit down on his desk top.

“Yeah but he’s going to miss class,” pressed Sungyeol.

“He knows that very well,” Myungsoo said, pretending not to understand what Sungyeol was implying. Woohyun was the best student of their class and the only reason he was not the Class President was because he spent too much time in detention after fighting with Sungyeol. If interactions with Sungyeol were not counted, he was positively charming, all the teachers’ pet, and whatever he did, he never missed classes.

“What do you want me to do Sungyeollie? Go hunting for them?” asked Myungsoo exasperatedly.

“Them, what them? I was talking about Howon only,” Sungyeol jumped.

“I won’t then,” said Myungsoo flatly.

“Fine, I’ll look for Howon and bring Howon back.”

“But then you have to carry me because I’m too tired.”

“You were doing Sungjong’s chores last night again?”

“Yep, I had to wrestle them away from him though, while you, Woohyun and Howon went to see that movie.” Sungyeol winced at ‘Woohyun’ but let it pass.

“But you said you’re going to study for the test?”

“Well, I didn’t. I don’t want Howon to think that I’m stealing his brother or anything. It’s okay, I’m not terribly worried about the test. Woohyun will let me copy.”

“And what about me?” Sungyeol wailed. “That jerk will never let me see.” Myungsoo openly sighed. He had this conversation before but Sungyeol, like the choding he was, needed reassurance every time.

“He knows I’ll let you see my one, so he doesn’t have to let you copy directly.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” asked Sungyeol but he looked relieved all the same.

The bell rang shrilly, indicating the end of freedom for the students. The soccer players left the field one by one, sweaty and red-faced, their uniforms in a mess. As Howon began to follow them, Woohyun fell onto the ground with a loud thump.

“No, you’re kidding me. Nam Woohyun will miss a class!” Howon said laughing.

“Wonnie, pwease,” said Woohyun cutely, puffing up his cheek and making a heart sign with his fingers.

“Honestly Woohyun, why?” asked Howon, sitting down beside him, letting the sweat drops roll down his forehead.

“I wuv you Howonnie,” said Woohyun and leaned on Howon’s shoulder. As good he was in his studies, Woohyun was also a master of aegyo. Myungsoo enjoyed his aegyo, while Sungyeol scoffed at it—Howon’s feelings were mixed. He tried not to show he liked it too much in case Sungyeol called him girly like Sungjong but he couldn’t help giving into Woohyun when he was being that adorable. In fact, only when he was alone with Woohyun could he show his soft side. In front of the others he acted tough, although they knew it was just a pretense. They let it slide by, never confronting him. It was another of those unspoken vows.

“Woohyunie, I still think we should go now,” Howon said, casting a worried glance at the empty fields. All the students, even the tardy ones, were settled in their classes by then. It was a record for Woohyun to be this late.

“Will you do me a favor, Howon?” asked Woohyun in a serious tone suddenly.

“What?” asked Howon, looking at Woohyun’s grave face. Even a minute ago he was smiling but suddenly he looked nothing like himself. It scared Howon; as if suddenly the friend he knew even before he knew his younger brother looked like a complete stranger.

What is he thinking? He doesn’t look like himself at all. Those rigid lines on his face, where did they come from? Ususally after fights with Sungyeol, they would ignore each other until they find new insults to throw at each other. It isn’t about Sungyeol, something else. Could it be…

“I’ll tell you, come here,” Woohyun whispered, although there was no living being let alone students in their vicinity. He pulled Howon’s head close to his and said in his ears, “I’m going to escape from school, okay? You have to help me and cover it up.”

“Are you out of your mind?” Howon barked, jumping away from him. He definitely did not know this Woohyun.

“Please Hobaby, just this once, pweaswe,” he scrunched up his face in an adorable pout and looked at Howon with watery eyes. His face became more recognizable to Howon.

Even when he’s this serious, he knows how to use his weapons. This kid! Just this once maybe although I don’t know how exactly I’m going to convince Myungsoo and Sungyeol.

Howon sighed, “Fine, but you owe me big time. I’m not asking you anything because I trust you, you know that right?” He uttered the last sentence standing up and turning away from Woohyun. He felt awkward saying it in his face.

“I promise,” said Woohyun with a smile, getting up and dusting away the grass from his pants. What he promised he didn’t say but Howon knew it meant he was up to nothing that would cost him their friendship.

Usually the main gate of their school wasn’t locked or guarded since the students never had any reason to go out. Howon knew Woohyun could easily slip out and he just had to cover him briefly before he trudged back to class pretending nothing had happened.

Although if I do get caught by a passing teacher what the hell will I tell them? Standing by the gate like a fool—

“Aaargh!” A loud scream sent goose bumps up their arms as they were immobilized for a second. The voice was high-pitched and seemed to be in mortal agony.

“Must be her,” said Woohyun with a small smile. “That must cause enough distraction so you can run off to class.” Woohyun was gone like a flash.

“Boy, what got her cranky?” asked Howon as he started towards their homeroom.

He was sure that the scream had come from Hyuna sunsaengnim, their homeroom and Physics teacher. She was known for her shrieks, although most of the time, they were the products of her over reaction towards something small and insignificant. She had the tedious habit of making mountains out of molehills and never listening to the student’s explanation first. As Howon walked up to the door to their homeroom, he saw that Hyuna sunsaengnim was standing in front of the class, looking petrified. The expression on her face would make people think she had seen nothing less than a dead body.

“He’s dying, take him to the hospital,” she squealed to no one in particular.

The students looked at her as if her sanity was in question. The entire school was so used to her shrieks by now so no one bothered to show up anymore when she was in one of her fits.

 Howon leaned into the classroom to see who was dying. He couldn’t say he was surprised when he saw everyone was perfectly fine.

“Sunsaengnim, Woohyun and …” Sungyeol started. He was satnding with a pained expression on his face, identical to any student who had been trying to reason with a dead tree.

“Woohyun stabbed you, how could he?” Hyuna screeched, tearing at her hair. “What will I tell everyone? Police! Police!”

“We were just fighting—” Sungyeol tried again.

“Why did you have a sword fight? Didn’t I tell you boys not to play with sharp objects! Oh no, ambulance!”

“He threw spaghetti sauce—”

“You two fought over spaghetti sauce? And now he escaped? Coward!”

“It’s not bloo—”

“Someone help him, he needs CPR!”

Although the whole situation was ridiculous, Howon couldn’t help feeling sorry for Sungyeol. He was Hyuna sunsaengnim’s most preferred target. If Sungyeol didn’t come to school one day, he had been kidnapped; if he laughed in class, he had inhaled something funny in Chemistry lab; if he was quiet, he had taken sleeping pills; if he talked too much, he had taken the wrong type of drugs. Whatever he did was wrong and Hyuna was always to the rescue. Howon wondered why Sungyeol hasn’t already killed her. Actually, he would have if she wasn’t Woohyun’s favorite teacher. Howon was wondering what crazy antics Hyuna was up to now. He froze when he saw that Hyuna was marching towards Sungyeol, preparing to administer CPR on him.

“What the—” Sungyeol stopped as she grabbed his chin.

“Aah, Myungsooah, help you idiot! Stop laughing!” Sungyeol cried as he tried to wriggle free of her vice-like grip.

Myungsoo showed no sign of helping though; he was very amused and pouted his lips in a kiss, teasing Sungyeol.

When her lips were inches away from Sungyeol, Howon desperately shouted, ‘Sunsaengnim! Woohyun just escaped!”

 Hyuna turned around to look at Howon. Sungyeol took this moment of distraction to wriggle free from her and run towards the door.

“We’ll find him,” he said to nobody in particular and grabbing Hoya by the shirt and dragged him out into the corridor. “Don’t stop,” he gasped and didn’t do so until they were out of the school gates.

“Can’t breathe,” mouthed Sungyeol, panting hard. Howon waited for him to catch his breath. He didn’t get breathless so soon, he was an athlete after all.

“That woman, she—” Sungyeol stopped dead as a pair of hands grabbed his middle and drew him backwards. Before he could take another breath, someone kissed him on his cheeks.

“SUN-SAENG-NIM!” he screamed louder than Hyuna had ever done, pushing the figure away from him. The birds in the tree beside them flew away, chirping loudly. Sungyeol stomped his feet angrily, as Howon stared, his eyes wide.

“You evil woman, you’re the end of me!” Sungyeol cried, rubbing the spot where the kiss had burned his cheeks.

“You liked it, didn’t you?” a mischievous voice said behind him. Sungyeol stopped rubbing his chin and said in a menacing voice, “It better not be you Kim Myungsoo, when I turn around.”

Howon and Myungsoo started laughing Sungyeol’s cheeks grew pink as he turned around, “Hyah, stop scaring me, will ya?”

“Sorry Yeollie,” said Myungsoo, wrapping his arm around Sungyeol fondly. “But your face in class was priceless. And I’m pretty sure Howon enjoyed the drama as well.”  

“Seriously guys, is it too wrong to wish she’s dead,” sighed Sungyeol, relaxing against Myungsoo and putting all his weight on him.

“Yes, since Woohyun adores her,” said Howon smiling but stopped abruptly.

“Where’s the feather head?” asked Sungyeol.

“I don’t know, he left school,” Howon said worriedly.

“What?!” Myungsoo and Sungyeol exclaimed.

“Something’s up. He reacted to Sungyeol so easily, then he didn’t want to go to Hyuna sunsaengnim’s class. Then he escaped,” said Howon.

Myungsoo looked back. “Let’s make a run for it guys, before the teachers come looking for us,” said Myungsoo.

“W-what? We’re going to run away? B-but…” Sungyeol gulped, looking at the school gate apprehensively.

“Hyuna sunsaengnim is looking for you Yeollie. She’s really mad that you gave her the slip. And besides, what are we going to tell our grandchildren if we never run away from school?” said Myungsoo.

That was enough to straighten up Sungyeol. “What about our bags though?” asked Howon. He didn’t care for the books but his salary from last month was in his bag. He had brought it to pay his school fees.

“Well Howon, you’re the fastest runner,” said Myungsoo. “We’ll meet you at the restaurant.”

“That’s great, while I run the risk of getting caught by that woman here, you two are going to go on a date. So typical, Myungsoo,” Howon grumbled.

“Love you too,” said Myungsoo and took Sungyeol’s hand. “Let’s go,”

“Why are we going to the restaurant? Oh wait, Sungjong must be there by now,” said Sungyeol, looking at his wristwatch.

“That’s correct brother,” said Myungsoo.

“Hey Mun, is it okay to skip school?” Sungyeol’s voice didn’t tremble but Myungsoo knew he was scared. He called him ‘Mun’ only when he was frightened, or sad. This was the first time any of them was skipping school.

“Don’t worry Yeollie; we’ll miss the test though,” said Myungsoo.

“There’s no point taking the test without the featherhead,” said Sungyeol. “I don’t care about myself since there is no one to report to but what about your brother?”

“It’s ok,” said Myungsoo, trying not to think about Sunggyu’s face when the teacher tells him he had run out of school. “We need to find Woohyun.”

Sungyeol fell quiet. “Why?” he finally asked.

Myungsoo looked taken aback. Sungyeol might pretend to hate Woohyun but he was pretty sure he was worried about him as well. “Aren’t you worried? We don’t know where he is and this is the first time he’s acting so weird—”

“I think I know where he is,” Sungyeol said quietly.

“What? Why didn’t you say it before? Did he tell you where he was…oh!” Myungsoo realized the moment Sungyeol looked up. “I’m sorry, I had totally forgotten.”

“Yeah me too, and I even teased him today, of all days.” Sungyeol’s fist was clenched.

“It wasn’t your fault, all of us had forgotten.” Myungsoo looked unsure. “Should we…”

“Let him be for the moment,” said Sungyeol, biting his lips.

Myungsoo did not say anything. There was no point arguing with Sungyeol because where Woohyun was concerned, as strange as it might seem, Sungyeol knew the best. These were the times when Myungsoo suddenly felt like an intruder in Sungyeol and Woohyun’s lives.

Sungyeol and Woohyun—they are more alike than different. I know they share something beyond our scope of understanding. They share the same nightmares, the same fears…I want to do something for them but for now the best I could do is to let them feel each other.

When they entered the cafe, it was devoid of customers. The café was usually packed from evening till midnight but saw only small businesses during the day. The owner, a short man wearing a baseball cap, came towards them smiling. He was dressed in funky attire, something you would not expect an entrepreneur to wear. There was even a glint of gold hanging from one of his ears. He called himself Jay Park, although his real name was Park Jaebum. Before he took over from his father, he used to own a restaurant in Washington DC. He had returned to Korea when his father had died and had inherited the café. Under him, the café went through some drastic renovations, was renamed ‘Jaywalker’s Place’, and made into a more cozy corner with loud hip-hop music blaring out from the speakers.

“Boys,” he said, shaking Sungyeol’s hand. “Howon’s not here yet.”

“No of course not, he was in school with us,” said Sungyeol. He didn’t think much of Jay Park but Myungsoo was fond of him.

“Ajhussi,” Myungsoo said with a smile. “Is Sungjongie…”

“Yeah, he just came,” said Jay, pointing towards the changing room. “Looks pretty beat up though.”

“Really?” scoffed Sungyeol. “Did the dishes give him a hard time? He wasn’t about to be butchered by a mad woman though, was he? Howon’s more man than…”

He stopped when he saw Sungjong pushing open the door to the changing room. Sungjong’s usual milky white skin looked pale. He was thinner than what Sungyeol had last seen. His brownish fringes were all over his eyes. His lips were ice white and he trembled slightly as he walked. There were dark circles underneath his eyes.

“Sungjongie,” said Myungsoo wincing, as if he was the one in pain.

“Oh hyung,” said Sungjong, his eyes shining with surprise and a tired smile lighting up his lips. He forced himself to straighten and walked towards them as if nothing was wrong.

Myungsoo couldn’t help but smile at Sungjong.

That’s why I love you Sungjongie. You can make anyone smile. You’re so brave and you always act as if nothing’s wrong. You’re happy with whatever you have and you care for people who are not even related to you. And you adore Howon, even though he’s never there for you. I wish I could be more like you…

“What’s wrong Sungjong?” asked Sungyeol, frowning.

“Of course nothing’s wrong hyung,” said Sungjong, patting Sungyeol’s arm. “Where’s my brother?”

“He’ll be here soon,” said Sungyeol. He was still staring at Sungjong, taking in his drooping eyelids and wrinkled smile. “You look dead though.”

“Sungjongie, you should go home, I’ll do your shift,” said Myungsoo kindly with a small smile.

“No hyung. You have already helped me a lot yesterday,” said Sungjong. His voice was soft but defiant.

“Are you kidding me, you can barely walk!” said Sungyeol.

“Didn’t you sleep last night kiddo?” asked Jay.

“I had a test to study for,” said Sungjong, suppressing a yawn. “And I had to cook for hyung before going to school…”

Myungsoo put his arms around Sungjong and said in a low, determined voice, “Listen Sungjongie, you’re in no condition to work. Here’s what we’ll do: Sungyeol hyung is going to take you home. I’m taking your shift. Howon will be here soon and he will help me. Arasso?”

“Me-I-Woohyun-I’ll call for the limo,” said Sungyeol as Myungsoo gave him a silent stare. He began dialing on his cell phone. Usually he didn’t use his limo but it was always at his service. He didn’t feel like carrying Sungjong because although he was thin, he was almost as tall as him and he didn’t have the heart to make him walk.

Sungjong was too faint to protest but he gave Myungsoo a small smile. Myungsoo returned it enthusiastically.

That’s all I need to see.

zqueenable

Chapter 1

“So Woohyunah, are you still hanging yourself from tree branches in the hopes of getting taller?” said Sungyeol in a loud voice so that everyone in a 5m radius could hear him. He was stretching back on his chair lazily and had a twinkle of mischief in his eyes as he looked around to check that there were enough Woohyun fan girls in the vicinity.

Woohyun’s face became tomato red while Myungsoo and Howon choked on the spaghetti and sauce on their lunch tray. It was for a split second though; Myungsoo hurriedly grabbed his napkin and regained composure as soon as he wiped the sauce from his lips. Howon, on the other hand, stuck out the tip of his tongue, slowly and deliberately, and licked the sauce off the corner of his lips, sending the girls on the next table into their lunch trays. With a satisfied smile, he looked up to see Woohyun’s face was composed as well.

“Well Sungyeol, I’ll rather not be tall and lose my brain as clearly demonstrated by you,” said Woohyun coolly.

It was Sungyeol’s turn to flush. He narrowed his eyes and leaned towards Woohyun, “Jealous Woohyun, that I get all the girls?” Splat!

The contents of Woohyun’s lunch tray went flying and landed on Sungyeol’s chest.

“You--” roared Sungyeol and grabbed Woohyun by the collar. Woohyun jumped up; his one hand flew at Sungyeol’s neck and the other clenched into a tight fist that made contact with his white jaws.

The students at the other table jumped out and moved away, the girls clutching at each other and straining their necks to see who took more hits. It was actually an everyday business at Infinite High. Sungyeol and Woohyun fought for anything and everything. Even the teachers were tired of putting them in detentions. Parents were called to no avail. Sungyeol’s parents always failed to turn up and Woohyun’s father only laughed when he heard his son had almost gouged out the eyes of his best friend’s son.

“We used to do that in school as well,” he would fondly recall. “Ah, those days,” he would sigh, staring at Sungyeol, who reminded him of his best friend. “I hope your dad’s doing well, we never get to meet these days.”

“Erm…” Sungyeol always looked anxious when anyone asked him about his parents.

“Mr. Nam,” the teachers would try to explain to him the seriousness of the fight but all was in vain.

Myungsoo looked at Sungyeol and Woohyun’s faces, handsome but disfigured by rage at the moment.

Here we go again.

It has been almost four years and yet he wondered how Woohyun and Sungyeol had managed to remain friends. Myungsoo had thought before that Howon and he acted as the glue to their friendship but he had given up on that thought.

Woohyun and Sungyeol are more than friends—they are entwined somewhere—where even Howon and I am not allowed. To everyone it may seem that Woohyun and Sungyeol can kill each other but in truth, they would die for each other.

All of them could actually—Sungyeol, Woohyun and Howon and Myungsoo would gladly go through hell for one another, come back, and go through it all over again. Such was the power of their friendship.  

While Myungsoo chewed his bottom lip nervously, Howon looked nonchalantly at Woohyun and Sungyeol throwing punches at each other, twirling a long piece of spaghetti at the end of his chopstick. He usually would never intervene unless the fight gets too bloody.

“It’s better if they let it all out instead of having bad memories,” Howon had said when Myungsoo had asked why he never tried to stop the fights.

“Seriously, we still have to get through four more classes today,” murmured Myungsoo and went to stand between the fighting pair. By then, Sungyeol was sporting a bloody lip and Woohyun had a large lump on his forehead.

“Come back, I’ll show you what a real punch feels like,” Woohyun growled, his body trying to shove Myungsoo from between them. However, both he and Sungyeol had dropped their punches in case they accidentlly hit Myungsoo. It was an unwritten vow they had taken—they would never hit Myungsoo, not even accidentally. So Myungsoo standing in the no-man’s land between them usually meant the end of physical brawl.

“Sorry Woohyunie, can’t see you. Try heels next time,” said Sungyeol snidely. Woohyun flung hiMyungsooelf towards Sungyeol while Myungsoo lunged forward to shield Sungyeol’s body, pushing him against the wall. Before Woohyun could crash into Myungsoo, Howon caught him from behind.

“Woohyun, stop it now,” Howon said silently in his ears and then loudly, “And you too, Sungyeol.”

“He stopped a long time back, you think he has the guts?” spat Woohyun.

Myungsoo felt Sungyeol’s body trying to push him aside wildly and he turned, his face inches away from Sungyeol’s. They looked into each other’s eyes—the angry coal black ones fought for domination with the calm, commanding ones and finally lost. Sungyeol’s hands dropped to his sides and he lightly pushed Myungsoo away, storming off through the parting crowd of students. Myungsoo turned around and nodded at Howon, then followed Sungyeol out of the cafeteria.

“Let’s go play some soccer Woohyun,” said Howon, grabbing Woohyun firmly by the wrist. Woohyun let Howon steer him to the school’s football field, while the girls stared at them in awe. Since it was break time, the soccer club members were practicing on the field.

‘Woohyun will take the right wing,” shouted Howon, while he went to stand as the goalkeeper. Even though Woohyun was seething with rage, he played really well, venting his anger at the ball.

Myungsoo, on the other hand, followed Sungyeol to an empty classroom. Sungyeol put his feet up on one of the desks moodily and started throwing bits of chalks at the board.

“Tomorrow’s Parent’s Day Yeollie, what are your parents going to say if you get reported again?” asked Myungsoo wearily, sitting down on a desk. He had asked this before many times and he knew the answer he was going to get.

“They’re not coming,” Sungyeol replied. “Your brother’s coming, right?”

“Yes, although I asked him not to a thousand times,” said Myungsoo, staring at the ceiling. “The way he looked at me when I told him he’s not my parent…I don’t know what he expects from me.”

“Maybe that you’ll become a genius like him, graduate from University early and become a Physics professor at 23,” said Sungyeol and laughed out aloud.

Myungsoo rolled his eyes at him but he knew, inside, that Sungyeol was probably right. Growing up in the shadows of Kim Sunggyu—a child prodigy, an award-winning student, and a renowned professor—wasn’t easy for him. Having no parents on top of that was even worse. Their relatives pitied him because he had no parents and told him to grow up and be like Sunggyu. He was tired of this.

As if being a copy cat of Sunggyu is the only way of being successful in life. I hate it. And even if I do something, it’s not good enough because Sunggyu had already done it. And if I do well in something Sunggyu never could, such as playing the guitar, everyone would say I am wasting my time.

Myungsoo had always wanted a younger brother. That is why he harboured such great affection for Howon’s younger kid brother, Sungjong.

“Hey are you thinking about your idiot brother?” Sungyeol’s voice brought Myungsoo back to the classroom.

“Hmm ye- I mean no. Hey can’t you respect other people’s siblings? Just because you don’t have one—”

“Whoa, this is new. You’re the one complaining about how your bro’s a nutcase,” said Sungyeol, picking at his sauce-stained tie.

“Sunggyu’s a nutcase, but I was talking about Sungjong,” Myungsoo scowled.

“Sungjongie!” exclaimed Sungyeol. “Oh come on, even Howon admits he’s girly.”

“You know he does that to please you,” said Myungsoo, always the observant one.

Sungyeol was silent for some time.

“Howonnie, we go way back, before high school, like Woo—” Sungyeol stopped abruptly. “Howonnie hangs out at my place a lot, even as kids we were together most of the time. I was lonely, and he kept me company.”

And left Sungjong alone. Myungsoo added in his head. He felt pained thinking about Sungjong, small and alone, doing chores around the house while his brother was busy goofing around with his best friend.

Howon and Sungyeol were polar opposites in terMyungsoo of social status. Sungyeol’s parents were multimillionaires whereas Howon lost his parents right after his younger brother was born. Ever since then, he had worked at his uncle’s shop, his father’s friend. He had literally raised Sungjong. Although the uncle initially looked after them, he passed away when Howon was 14. The restaurant was run by his son now and both Howon and Sungjong worked at the restaurant after school.

On the other hand, Sungyeol’s parents were separated. His mother, a fashion designer, lived in Paris while his father, a business tycoon, opted for the luxury apartment above his 23-storey office building. None of them could care less about Sungyeol. They felt that they had given Sungyeol everything a child can ever wish for—money, luxury and freedom. Sungyeol lived in the huge mansion all alone. Well, not exactly alone; he had butlers, maids, a caretaker, gardener, chauffeur, which meant he didn’t need to take care of anything. His tutor, Park Jungmin, also lived with him and was mostly responsible for his welfare.

Sungyeol was very easily a spoiled brat. But he would always be there for his friends. He could easily help Howon financially with his pocket money alone but never did that because he knew it would hurt Howon’s pride. Instead, he would sneak treats and good snacks in Howon’s bag, always saying they were for Sungjong if Howon asked. Another thing which Howon was grateful for was the fact that Sungyeol treated him as normally as any of his friends. Infinite was one of those rich kid schools, where the social misfits were not welcome. Sungyeol had ensured, through some contacts of his,that Howon had gotten the scholarship offered by the school. Howon was not a brilliant student, so he received 50% scholarship. It was the only way Howon could afford the same high school as them. Sungjong read with full scholarship at his school so it had taken some of the burden off Howon’s shoulder. Sometimes he felt guilty though since Sungjong and he earned equal amounts but he definitely spent more.

“You call him a girl but he works harder than you,” Myungsoo reminded Sungyeol, taking the rest of the chalk pieces out of his hand.

“That’s why you go and help him?” asked Sungyeol, getting up from the chair.

“I try but he’s so nice that he declines my offer every time,” said Myungsoo fondly.

“Does he really do the dishes at the restaurant? So girly!” exclaimed Sungyeol.

“Say that once again and I’ll strangle you,” warned Myungsoo with a smile, getting up and putting his hands around Sungyeol’s neck softly, caressing his Adam’s apple while resting his chin on his shoulder.

“We’ll see about it,” Sungyeol smiled back and patted Myungsoo’s hands. When Myungsoo didn’t let go, Sungyeol walked out of the room, Myungsoo tugging along behind him.

zqueenable

Prologue

Infinite High School was proud of its own set of ‘F4’—a group of the most elite students who served successfully as both eye candies and rulers of the student body. Nam Woohyun, Lee Sungyeol, Lee Howon and Kim Myungsoo of the senior class were the apples of the girls’ eyes. Even the guys in school let them have their way. They were no less popular than idols: their glamour, fame and love were in every way comparable, complete with their own fan club. Even student from other schools haunted their twitter accounts. They were used to being ogled at by girls and guys alike. Although they bathed in their handsome glory, they used their power to set up some unspoken rules. At school, they mingled very less and though all the students were allowed to glue their eyes to them, no one was allowed to invade their privacy.

Although they lived every teenager’s dream at school, they each had their own dark stories. All of them were locked up inside a prison—a dark cellar inside their heads from where they tried to desperately escape. It was a torturous journey for them and at the end of the road, they only had themselves…