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randomcontrol
@wasteofaface
Storyteller with a passion for stories
Los Angeles, CA
Joined February 2011
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    scariest thing that ever happened to me was when I went to a bookstore on acid without knowing that Bill Clinton was speaking there
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    In tennis “love” is something you “don’t want”. Twisted little sport...
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    just told an interviewer i’m “obsessed with steamlining processes”
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    fake falling asleep in the uber so the driver has to carry me to bed
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    what was “the incident” at ur world’s trade center
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    The ceo of gt kombucha was in my dream again
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    at my bat mitzvah right before i started crying cuz my mom called me "handsome"