The Senate voted me NOT GUILTY! Yay! Thanks to my Republacan Senators (except Senator Romney) for helping ME cover up MY crimes! Best trial ever! No witnesses allowed! No facts allowed! Best cover-up EVER!!
Donald J. Trump ........................... ᵖᵃʳᵒᵈʸ
2,138 posts
Donald J. Trump ........................... ᵖᵃʳᵒᵈʸ
@realDonaldTrFan
45th Parody of the United States of America 🇺🇸. Don’t forget to turn on notifications for this Parody account. Donations accepted at paypal.me/RealDonaldTrFan
- VERY MAD! I'M IN AIR FORCE ONE! Just flew over MY rally in Tulsa! STREETS EMPTY! WHERE IS EVERYBODY? I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE BIG CROWDS! ERIC TRUMP PROMISED ME A MILLION PEOPLE! HE SAYS 1000s of seats are empty in the arena! ERIC IS AN IDIOT! #TulsaTrumpRally #TrumpsCoronavirusRally
- VERY Happy to anounce that the FAMOUS defense attorney Alan Dershowitz will defend ME at MY impeachment! Dershowitz defended murderers like OJ Simpson and sex offenders like Jeffrey Epstein! He ONLY defends the WORST scum on this planet! He's the perfect person to defend ME!
- VERY ANGRY!! Just left Kim Jung Uns hotel room! We are sooo done! HE went to the bathroom. Then I rolled over & looked at his phone! He’s been TEXTING Putin! PUTIN!! With selfies! Kim said there Just Friends! Bullshit! Not with THOSE pics! Feel so used!!NEED ice cream! #TrumpFail
- I DID IT!! Coward Obama didn't do it! I went to Iraq! For an hour! An HOUR! No one is BRAVER then ME! It was scary! They made my airplane dark! Then my big plane landed! I ran into the building! Very FAST! Everybody saw I did it! They Clapped! Im a HERO! I'm a veteran! I DID IT!!
- I just oficially withdrew the US from the Paris Climate Agreement. Nobody even knew what was in it! 25 pages long!! With words on EVERY page! Too many words to read! And why name it after Paris Hilton? Makes NO sense! She's HOT, but totally clueless about controlling the weather!
- LIBERATE AMERICA! Whoever is in charge of the Fedral goverment is doing a TERRIBLE job!!!
- WOW! I just made the Greatest deel EVER! Greenland! A Nigerian Prince sent me an e-mail! He said he owned Greenland! Because his dad was a Dutch King! HE SOLD ME GREENLAND for $700 Million dollars! At first he wanted $1 Billion dollars, but he gave ME 50% off since I payed CASH!!
- I'm in the White House. All by myself. I'm bored! MY Secret Service Agents Bob & Dave are here to. They HAVE TO watch Me. But they wont talk to me! There mad since I won't let them get payed. Sooo immature! Dave got ME my ice cream. Only 1 scoop! I WANTED 2 scoops!! I hate Dave!
- North Korea's Kim Jong Un - who Loves ME very much - is NOT dead! He's just in a Vegetative State! Which is no big deel! I go into Vegetative States all the time!! #KIMJONGUNDEAD
- Just found out Australia ALREADY celabrated New Years Eve!! HOURS before the United States!! Its 2019 in Australia and 2018 in the USA! Gives them a huge UNFAIR advantage! How did we let them get ahead of us? Now there laughing at us! #NewYearsEve #HappyNewYear2019 #HappyNewYear
- If anyone is looking for a good porn star for a DISCRETE extramarital affair, I would strongly suggest that you don’t retain the services of Stormy Daniels! #WednesdayWisdom
- For the first time in history there is a fully signed Presidential Disaster Declaration for ALL 55 States! Thanks to ME, we have a DISASTER in every state! Even my worst critics didn't think I could do this! MAGA!
- They took ME to Walter Reed hospital! I took a test! A cognative test! To see how smart I am! ACED IT! I got to play with red & blue blocks! They told me to put square blocks in the holes! Round blocks too! AND TRIANGLES!! Some got stuck! Doctors were Surprised! Everyone clapped!