Thank god at least one person picked themselves up and realised they still had a job to do today..
Danny Bhoy
647 posts
- I’ve just lost 15 minutes of my act, and I couldn’t be happier. #bidenharis2020
- All that speculation over who was the biggest threat to our democracy? ISIS? The Russians? North Korea? Turns out, it was the pensioners.
- Dear World Leaders, stop saying you'll work with Trump 'in the interests of the world.' Literally nothing could be further from the truth.
- Dear restaurants, when you tell me I can have a table, but ‘the kitchen is closing in 20 minutes..’ Are you inviting me in? Or, telling me to fuck off? Has bothered me for years.
- "Ok, bedtime Mr President. Yes, he started it. Yes, we can go to McDonald's tomorrow. Yes, you won the election. Now, PJ's and bed please!"Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
- Dear Hotels, charging people for wifi is just not something we do anymore.
- Does anyone know where the 'reboot' button for 2016 is? #riseoftheidiots
- Nothing reminds you how many bad films were made last year than a long-haul flight.
- Tweets don’t get much more ignorant than this. Terrible President. Awful human.In the East, it could be the COLDEST New Year’s Eve on record. Perhaps we could use a little bit of that good old Global Warming that our Country, but not other countries, was going to pay TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS to protect against. Bundle up!
- Only in Britain: “Hello, I’d like to buy a train ticket from Edinburgh to London please?” - Are you travelling today, Sir? “Yes.” - It’s probably cheaper to get a taxi.
- Thanks to everyone who came along to my Canada tour. 27 stages, 19 cities, 5 weeks.. And I wasn’t even running for anything! Other than apologising at every show, this is probably the most Canadian thing I did.. #ageoffools
