friend of mine just told me a guy she was seeing abruptly ended their relationship after spending a perfect day together, and when she asked him why he did that he said “well when you put a dog down you try to give it one last good day”
Maria
14.4K posts
Maria
@mlstrat
attorney! love: sports (f1, pga, football, basketball, tennis), the south, birds, adventure, and butter; all views mine
washington, d.c.
Joined May 2022
- not to brag — lmao — but i was in the room for this and it was absolutely electricthe absolute highlight of my thanksgiving this year was this little wiggle the miniature bull terrier did during the #NationalDogShow!!!
00:00 - sitting in front of a man and woman on the train who have hit it off and lord, this is better than drugs
- at my big age i should know better than to ask a man two questions in an email when i need both of them answered
- man struck up a conversation with me in the airport and admitted he had just gotten off the phone with his 30-y.o. daughter, during which she complained about dating, and he “really just wanted to ask a woman around her age if it was really that bad or if she was being dramatic”
- a load-bearing bit among my friends came from a guy on the periphery who came to a party, walked outside where we were talking, and said “moon looks great tonight.” everyone agreed, went back to talking. upon a lull he said “speaking of the moon, i made the nasa website” 😂
- one time when i was in law school i made a cake and brought it to school and everyone asked me why and i didn’t have the heart to tell them it was my stress coping mechanism so i looked up what celebrity was born that day and just said it was for laura dern’s birthday
- what happened to circling back after the holidays!!!! why does everyone need everything now!!!! what is going on!!!!
- work bestie wanted to propose to his gf but couldn’t figure out how to subtly tell her to get her nails done, so i told him to pay her friend and have the friend pretend she got a gift card to the salon that was soon to expire. absolute fail. the gf declined to join… twice
- why do i feel like this inauguration is shaping up to be a william henry harrison situation where trump refuses to wear a coat as a sign of power and then promptly dies
- always distressing when i want the clothing designed for baby children. i, an adult woman, also want to enjoy the whimsy of the banana pockets
- Replying to @mlstratso now we use “speaking of the moon” whenever we want to hijack the conversation our way without being subtle
