Matt Forde (@mattforde) / X

Matt Forde

40.7K posts

Matt Forde

@mattforde

Comedian. @TheRNOHCharity and @BCRT Ambassador. #NFFC and ham sandwich fan. Chordoma survivor. Stoma owner. Cancer free since 2023.

Tickets for all shows:

mattforde.com/mailing-list

Joined March 2009

Pinned
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Aug 15, 2025
MY BRAND NEW TOUR IS ON SALE NOW! It’s my biggest ever tour, 51 dates across the UK. Featuring Donald Trump, Angela Rayner, Lee Anderson, Keir Starmer and Oasis What more do you want? Ok, there’s some (soft) dick jokes too. Tickets: mattforde.com
255K
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Jun 24, 2020
Keir Starmer is classier, sharper, more thoughtful, better briefed, more considered, more mature, has better instincts, is cannier, more talented, more composed and more Prime Ministerial than Boris Johnson.
Matt Forde
@mattforde
May 10, 2020
What a brilliant photo. Beautiful setting, the finger wag, the social distancing, Johnson’s face... I think it’s just the visual reminder that we live in a democracy
Matt Forde
@mattforde
May 24, 2020
Boris Johnson just lost the next election
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Mar 29, 2020
“It’s a moveable date, it’s not like Easter” says Michael Gove, naming a moveable feast
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Mar 19, 2020
Supermarkets have been able to cope with the demands of 60 million people every day of the year for my entire life. The system works. If you stockpile, not only are you ruining a system that means you can always get what you need when you need it, you’re a selfish twat.
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Aug 16, 2022
Someone brought their baby to my show last night. Sadly it derailed large parts of it because they wouldn't do the decent thing and just leave when it started crying. I get that it must be tough as a new parent but please, don't bring babies to adult shows. It's always a problem.
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Jan 31, 2022
Boris Johnson at 3.45pm: I’ll be more responsible from now on Boris Johnson 5 minutes later: Here’s a Jimmy Savile gag
Matt Forde
@mattforde
May 26, 2020
Stuck in my flat for over 10 weeks. Not been outside at all. No sun on my face, no fresh air in my (feeble) lungs. I'm going to do the 12 weeks as I'm wary of catching or helping spread the virus. But my GOD, they've made me feel like a mug for sticking to rules when they haven't
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Jun 15, 2020
I had free school meals. I had to queue up for a token. A terrible, shaming way of doing it. Worse still was the fear of an error and my name not being on the list. Low income families need those meals. @MarcusRashford is absolutely right and he’s a hero for this campaign.
BBC Breakfast
@BBCBreakfast
Jun 15, 2020
"I once had to go through that same system" In a TV exclusive with #BBCBreakfast @MarcusRashford explains why he's calling for a u-turn over the decision to end free school meal vouchers in England over summer. More here: bbc.in/2YxAF4M
00:00
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Jul 5, 2022
He should never have been Prime Minister. He was always going to be a disaster. It’s a disgrace that we’ve been put through this as a country.
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Apr 6, 2020
I don’t think we can underestimate how distressing this is for the country. For all the cynicism around politics, the vast majority of us want our Prime Ministers to succeed. We live our national story through them. I never thought I’d be so emotional about Boris Johnson.
Matt Forde
@mattforde
May 12, 2020
Odds on the next election being Sunak v Starmer?
Matt Forde
@mattforde
Jun 25, 2020
Keir Starmer draws a contrast not just with Jeremy Corbyn but with Boris Johnson. Corbyn and Johnson are part of the same political culture, promoting and standing by toxic individuals. Starmer is showing the way to a new, more decent era.