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Mads🥂
@madisommelier
I’m not madison, just dissapointedison // 5th year Sommelier , 1st year Barback , 3rd year training for the Coney Island Hotdog Contest. Stream Timorasso
New Yawk
Joined November 2014
594
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25.4K
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  • Pinned
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Nov 14, 2018
    Hello to all my new followers, on this account we -are lactose intolerant -boycott Victoria’s Secret -kiss our webkinz goodnight -ᴾʳᵃᶦˢᵉ ᶜᵗʰᵘˡʰᵘ -Have fluctuating serotonin levels and sometimes mess up but that’s okay we’re doing our best!!
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Jan 4, 2020
    Last night I invited a b*y on a date to my favorite bookstore/bar and he looked so uncomfy when he came in and I felt SO bad..I had completely forgotten all men are illiterate
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Dec 21, 2019
    When I was a freshman in college I took 12 tequila shots and robbed the largest frat house in the nation then sold all their shit on a Facebook page and paid my rent. Don’t ever say I’m not a real entrepreneur.
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Aug 20, 2023
    Made pesto with the addition of some herbs I grew from seed in my home ❤️ Tasted like shit I had cereal after
    7.3M
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Mar 11, 2020
    Somewhere...somehow...some frat boy is planning a coronavirus themed date party
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Mar 14, 2024
    Trying to eat out less this year so now I pretend my apartment is a tiny restaurant
    8.7M
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Jun 25, 2025
    My halal guy just sold me my gyro for $8 instead of $10 … Zohran campaign promises already being fulfilled
    1.4M
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Sep 8, 2020
    What if your card got declined at vineyard vines and they made you vote Democrat
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Nov 13, 2018
    Pros of waitressing: -get to talk to new people -unlimited access to ranch dressing -always on ur feet so exercise Cons: -dudes who tip 10% and leave their number on the receipts dammit Chad I have rent to pay not dicks to suck
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    May 26, 2025
    They keep panning to furries instead of veterans at the Memorial Day Mets game lmaoooooo
    1.2M
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    May 18, 2019
    When he asks you to get on top
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Apr 25, 2020
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Jul 21, 2023
    Attempting to resist posting dating app screenshots but I NEED y’all’s opinion on this because lol
    4.3M
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    Mads🥂
    @madisommelier
    Sep 19, 2019
    Sucking a small dick to get free food call that micro economics