gay person: I’m gay
straight person: I’m straight
bi person: I’m bisexual
my roommate who texts me every time he’s gonna cook an onion:
elizabeth 🤓
4,379 posts
the talent manager of every big billy bass singing fish. contact for bookings
- none of your “recession indicators” eclipse what I just saw
- even 9/11??In my book, every day is National Ice Cream Day.
- thinking about when I visited LA at 16 and tried to take tumblr photos in front of this “aesthetic blue building”
- the article just says it’s 7 of these btwSeven Ways to Actively Fight Depression... bit.ly/2cWTN5T
- rooting around in the airport cannabis amnesty box like a truffle pig
- this is christmas for bisexual millennial women that only date menJohn Mulaney to host SNL with Chappell Roan as the musical guest on November 2nd.
- Don’t text your ex. Text your mayor. Really: 917-909-2288.
- me: I fucking hate being told what to do me when cha cha slide comes on: left foot two stomp
- me paying 35$ for lukewarm taco bell delivered to my doorstep at a horrific hour
- finally seeing one of these in real life hit like crack cocaine
- i’ve met this creature as he drove through the mallThere is a ...HUGE bunny at the Giants/Mariners game.
























