You know what the secret to comedy is?
Dave Wiskus
20.6K posts
Dave Wiskus
@dwiskus
- The Matrix described 1999 as the peak of human civilization and I laughed because that would obviously not age well but then the next 23 years happened and now I’m like yeah okay maybe the machines had a point
- Watching Dark Phoenix. I don’t recommend it. But I liked this detail: Professor X is wearing a Rolex Milgauss. Famously used by CERN scientists because it’s… wait for it… resistant to magnets
- One time I went to Iceland and accidentally bought a sweater for a stranger on the internetPeople are amazing! Just 10 days ago, I shared a thought about one of my regrets in life. Of course, not buying a sweater sounds like a minor regret, but SO MANY could relate! And then @dwiskus made my wish a reality. This sweater made it from NYC to Berlin in record time! 🐧
- Replying to @CeliaBedeliaMy regret is that I bought this exact sweater for my wife two years ago. She has worn it zero times. I’m in NYC. Cover shipping and it’s yours.
- You know what the secret to comedy is?
- Replying to @dwiskusbecause I already voted for her a week ago EARLY VOTING LET’S GOOOOOOOO
- Lost in the naked racism of what he said is that Hinchcliffe’s joke was insinuating that Puerto Ricans were entering the US illegally. Puerto Ricans. Entering the US. Illegally.
- Call me old-fashioned but my apologies don't usually end with "we're not going to stop"
- Replying to @dwiskusLest anyone claim "it's the law," we have NOT received any such claims from Samsung, Apple, or Google.
- Jesus Christ even his farewell video is flawlessly executed
- Replying to @dwiskusAlso, we requested to see this policy and were told: "There is no guideline file that guides the seller to the policy." So LGBTQ+ content violates their policy that they won't show us.
