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Tommy Dassalo
@dassalo
Stand-up special SCAM ARTIST and my video game SUPER DASSALO LAND both available now. I co-host these podcasts: @DumDumClub & @FilthyCasPod
Melbourne
tommydassalo.com
Joined March 2009
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  • Pinned
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Sep 2, 2024
    Here's my stand-up special SCAM ARTIST: youtube.com/watch?v=wQa5xe… I know it seems like I've been banging on about this non-stop but I never posted the link after it premiered and I'm doing it now because I simply MUST have a nice little pinned tweet on the ol' profile.
    8.4K
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Dec 17, 2019
    If you ever feel lonely, just get a fact slightly wrong on a podcast. You’ll be AMAZED by how many messages you receive!
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Oct 8, 2016
    NEW BANKSY IDEAS: a rat looking at a mobile phone, with a beautiful rainbow behind him. He doesn't see it because he's looking at the phone.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Sep 17, 2024
    Hey folks, bit of news here from me. End of an era etc. ✌️
    34K
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Jul 9, 2020
    You know, Shakespeare wrote Hamlet while he was in isolation for a second time after a security guard rooted someone with the plague.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Mar 13, 2020
    me and the boys self isolating
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    May 2, 2016
    me in 2012: 'my lifes a mess i wish i was dead' *four years later, 2012 comes up as a facebook memory* 'that was the best year of my life'
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Sep 10, 2020
    Two years ago, I took the long overdue step of getting on the mental health plan. It’s helped me immeasurably, to the point where I have not felt the need to have a single session in 2020 (which paints a grim picture of what my 2018 was like) Reach out, get help if you need it ✌️
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Feb 9, 2020
    Incredible boomer energy from the man next to me on a flight to Perth: spent the entire 3.5 hours reading the inflight magazine, cover to cover. Took a photo out of the window roughly every five minutes. Tried to haggle down the price of a white wine. A king.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Mar 22, 2019
    I hate novels where the author describes the characters’ appearance in too much detail. I reckon I’ll imagine this fake person however I want to, you fucking asshole.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Feb 1, 2019
    Excited to have a Friday night with no social commitments. Can’t wait to absolutely piss it away by sitting on the couch and staring at my phone for four hours, while a movie sits paused at the four minute mark on the TV.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Mar 13, 2020
    sure we complained about it, but the difference between scotty being in honolulu or australia during a crisis seems to honestly be negligible.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Dec 18, 2019
    The world is overrun with, and ruined by, people who don’t deal with their issues. Therapy should be like jury duty. If that letter comes in the mail then you’re legally obligated to rock up and have a cry about your dad.
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    Tommy Dassalo
    @dassalo
    Sep 16, 2019
    This morning I found a five dollar note on the ground and now there’s an episode of Seinfeld on that I’ve never seen before. I doubt I’ll ever get married so this is probably going to go down as the best day of my life.