ME: Yom Kippur is a time of forgiveness and this is my third time asking you to forgive me.
CREDIT CARD REP: That’s not how this works, Zvi.
Zvi Hershcovich
27.7K posts
Zvi Hershcovich
@cholentface
Top tweets: twitter.com/cholentface/ti… Shliach, Comedian, Screenwriter, Juggler. #FrumTwitter since 2009. DMs open.
Montreal
Joined March 2009
- SHABBOS HIGHLIGHTS BY AGE 3 - Staying up for the meal 5 - Shul Candyman 8 - Shabbos party 12 - Chess 15 - Cholent 20 - Shabbos walk 25 - Mitzvah night 30 - Kiddush club 40 - Shabbos nap 50 - Kiddush 60 - Correcting Baal Koreh 70 - Shabbos Shiur 80 - Shaleshudis 90 - Gefilte fish
- Boys who Girls who are not are not Shomer Negiah Shomer Negiah 🤝
- WHAT YOU ARE BASED ON HOW YOU SPELL CHANUKAH Hannukah: Reform or conservative Chanukah: FFB Khanuqah: Secular scholar Hannoukah: North African Sfardi Yarmulke: Misinformed reporter Chanikah: Chassidic Hannukia: Confused secular Chnkh: Croatian Chanuya: Rebellious BT Purim: Drunk
- flat out bummed that my Dad passed away this morning. he was awesome. funeral is tomorrow 2:30 at chesed shel emes on Beaumont
- Marvellous fun you take your father’s phone and WhatsApp a sibling moments after his Levaya 👍
- WAIT THE MIAMI BOYS CHOIR AREN'T FROM MIAMI??? WHAT ABOUT THE YESHIVA BOYS CHOIR? PUBLIC SCHOOL KIDS?????
- Jewish hand motions 👍 Fregt di Gemara 🤚 Sorry. I’m Shomer 👉 Put a ring on it 🤙 Flour sprinkler 🖖 Wash my hands, Levite! 👌 Get the salt for HaMotzi 🤜 Esnachta ✊ I don’t want to do Havdalah 🤞Your Tichel knot is undone 🤟 Learning Gemara with Rashi 🤲 You got a Bentcher?
- Close your eyes. Imagine a world where Loshon Hara doesn’t exist. A place without jealousy. Where people recognize that Gashmius is meaningless. Now open them. I ate the rest of your cheese Blintzes.
- MY SON: Tatty, why don’t we celebrate Halloween? ME: Jews don’t believe in superstitious ghosts, Ezra. Now finish reciting the Ushpizin before Eliahu HaNavi throws you out the Sukkah, Bli Ayin Hara!
- NETFLIX MANAGER: Let's release it on March 25th. SHTISEL PRODUCER: Are you sure? Isn't that like, Erev Pesach? NETFLIX MANAGER: So? SHTISEL PRODUCER: *under his breath* Reshaim Arurim.
