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the pasta portion size at kourtney kardashian’s wedding is the one of the saddest things i’ve ever seen
Cardi BTEC
59.1K posts
Cardi BTEC
@amelia_perrin
not bad for a girl with no talent
- my three year old asked me to ‘pretend she was 14’ for a minute so i said okay… you’re 14. so what’s your favourite thing to do as a 14 year old? and she replied ‘big girl things… like chopping onions’
- when he was a beanpole who looked like he hadn’t slept in two weeks covered in awful stick and poke tattoos i was FROTHING at the mouth and now i feel nothing. something i should probably address internallyPete Davidson debuts new look for Reformation’s Valentine campaign after spending $200k on tattoo removal.
- i know i’m old because i was in tk maxx buying a dish draining mat and some kids were about to film a tik tok in the aisles (they referenced the tik tok they were recreating & i was clueless) & as i walked past them one said ‘wait for the lady to go first’ THE LADY.
- a TRULY VERSATILE ITEM, with flats? school skirt when the main one was in the wash. crop top and wedges? big night out at nandos with the girls. trainers and a t-shirt? walking round a shopping centre as a date with a boy from MSN. blouse & tights? work experience. all for £8!!!mind this belter
- saw someone refer to london as ‘omicron head office’ and i haven’t stopped laughing about it since
- the 6 month old sweet potatoes in the back of my cupboard:The world’s oldest surviving diving suit, 18th century
- serious question what is the wiring difference in men’s/women’s brains that means women will think of everyone else first before their own needs and men are like: as long as i woz happy in the moment i fink i did the best i could x x xGerard Piqué speaks out after Shakira cheating scandal: “I keep doing what I want. The day I die, I will look back and hope I have always done what I wanted. I want to be faithful to myself.”
- people who don’t like Bounty’s think olives are gross, ask for their burger to come plain apart from the ketchup, and would make chicken breast wrapped in bacon if they ever got the chance to go on come dine with me. i said what i said!!!!
- molly mae is having a boy, she has boy-mum energy, they give me boy-couple vibes, idk how to describe it but that foetus has telepathically messaged me somehow
- last night we watched Everest. my bf said ‘more people have been to the moon than have summited Everest’ i thought it sounded wrong, but okay. an hour later he turned to me & said sadly ‘i got it wrong. more people have successfully climbed Everest than have won Takeshi’s Castle’
- this is literally every woman i knowIt’s so rare to meet a pretty woman that has a dope personality and is actually intelligent and can carry on great convo..
