Hmm I want this zit to go away maybe I should turn it into an open wound
Allison O'Conor
10.8K posts
Allison O'Conor
@allisonoconor
standup π€ gay btw π she π listen to Decadence on spotify and Apple Podcasts
- the cdc is just like uhhhh yeah it's totally up to you, I'm honestly down for whatever
- I cannot believe the masked singer is real. It seems like a fake tv show they watch in a tv show. Every time I see a clip I feel scared
- Guy just walked into the coffee shop wearing a cowboy hat and itβs obvious heβs not fully confident in it. Tough to see
- Love when a cool friend of a friend becomes a friend. What a win for the whole team
- Everyone is always like HOW is Pete Davidson DOING this!!!! And I guarantee you heβs just saying βwanna hang outβ
- I told a gay man I was a lesbian and he was like no way I just thought you were laid back
- Iβm not a licensed therapist but if you Venmo me $25 Iβll try my best for an hour on FaceTime
- It's weird that we are just letting ppl say they went to NYU, a fictional school that was made up as an aspiration for characters in teen shows who wanna escape their towns
- Been a while since someone posted this one guess itβs my turn
just learned that it only takes $27.30 a day to spend an extra $10,000 a year and suddenly my fun drinks and sweet treats arenβt so fun - Wtf am I gonna do next lockdown like I already realized Iβm gay what now
- Hitting up my male friends like hiiii miss you king wanna get a drink tomorrow and then help me take my AC out
- Nobody: Everyone on Halloween in 2019: ok so you know that one episode of that one show youβve never heard of? Right so Iβm dressed as that guy they pass in the hall in the very last scene before the credits. But not the actual guy, Iβm just dressed as the way he walks
- Sometimes you meet a girl and a gay guy and then you find out no actually theyβre dating
