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Eating fruit loops out of a plastic baggy on the train and nodding at a baby doing the same thing.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq
21.8K posts
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq
@VibesBummer
where’s beth?
- Opened the last pocket on the father’s day advent cargo pants.
- Always tell people you slept fine, otherwise they might try to offer you sleep advice.
- If you hold a croissant to your ear like a phone it connects you to the president of France.
- No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore
- Keeping my hospital bracelet on so I can get back in without paying again.
- Someone in 1983: they’ll cure cancer in my lifetime 2024: the best I can give you is oreo cookies inside of coca cola
- When I’m eating shared nachos I’m always thinking 3 nacho moves ahead of my opponent.
- Anyone that can swallow a pill without some water is an assassin.
- I’m convinced that inside centipedes are tiny people rowing.
- Before google maps you just had a buddy in another car who said follow me then proceeded to run a late yellow at an intersection.
- Used my one prison phone call to request a song on the radio.
- Maybe bigfoot needs to find himself first
- I could’ve gotten all the necessary ingredients for this salad dressing on 2, maybe 3, islands.