My therapist told me that anxiety and excitement are physically the same and when I feel anxious about something that I should pretend that I am excited. This morning I tried it and thought "I am so excited that everybody hates me"
Tig Notaro
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Tig Notaro
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- One time my gynecologist was like “you need to pee” and I was like “no I’m good” and he was like “I have a camera inside you and I can see that you need to pee” and it turns out he was right so that definitely feels like a step backwards for feminism
- Guys who are into woman who just turned 18 are like bosses that pay their employees minimum wage. Sure it’s “legal” but we know if it wasn’t for the law they’d be going lower.
- I don't agree with the reverse cowgirl position. Woman should face their problems.
- If you make fun of my messy car, don't come crying to me when you need 350 hot empty water bottles.
- New idea: men’s rights but for women
- Are you ever just being a woman and you think “oh this is how an svu episode starts”
- Don't understand Southerners who dislike non-binary pronouns when they invented a great one: "y'all."
- Chronic pain is your body is screaming “im in pain” and you are like ok what’s wrong and your body's like “that part is actually a secret”
- Lady Gaga gave an interview years ago about not sleeping with people while she was writing because they’d steal the creativity from her vagina and I think about that like once a week.
- Any pizza is personal if it killed your father
- All the wrong people hate themselves.
- The presidents all share the same bedroom one after the other? That’s kinda gay
- Do you think flo knew what she was getting into when she woke up and went to that first commercial audition