sergeant dick lips the third
39.1K posts
sergeant dick lips the third
@TeahLhompson
saying things often
charleston
Born February 12
Joined February 2010
- please stop retweeting the video of the man with the incredible legs doing a flip wearing heels and then turning into a pile of ahi tuna it made me scream out loud in starbucks by myself and people stared at me
- My ideal sleeping position? Side sleeping, Left leg straight out right leg 90 degree angle hiked up. One arm under the pillow one arm over. Multiple blankets fan on high NyQuil coursing though my bloodstream. Obama is there.
- I put my height in my tinder bio and 6 men unmatched with me.....i’m gonna break into y’alls houses and put all the remotes on top of the fridge
- I genuinely think this image could stop the heart of someone on shrooms
- can’t believe it’s this crazy girls birthday in just 21 days!
- is this the intro to john mulaney’s next netflix special
- Going out to dinner in your hometown means the hostess went to your grade school, a girl you hate is at the booth next to you, your hs friends mom is washing her hands in the bathroom and a boy you used to like is coming in the door when you’re leaving
- doing some spring cleaning in my basement loving this Barbie 9/11 collection
- so what we all just gave up on these? we all just said we aren’t going to actively eat the most delicious food in the world anymore?
- thinking about how my friend couldn’t remember a guys name yesterday so I said text him and say “how do u spell ur name so I can enter it in my phone”and he goes “....is there any other way to spell paul” and she panics and goes “pawl”
- imagine a southwest employee on the verge of a panic attack with tears in their eyes just restarting their computer over and over and from the crowd a woman approaches the bench and says hello I follow erika she’s a lawyer who reads the fine prin-
- when julia fox releases her book I am going to read it with a highlighter as if it were the old testament
- hey now that your incest dragon show is over can you text me back
