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Take That Darwin
@TakeThatDarwin
If evolution is true, then why are there still monkeys? Because they've adapted well to their ecological niche. He/him, but I'm not picky.
United States
Joined November 2012
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    I don't know what you expected to see today, but I bet it wasn't "a flat-Earther urging a robot to commit suicide."
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    In which flat-Earthers discover jpegs.
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    Homophobes often fear that they've been exposed to subliminal gay images. This Venn diagram illustrates my findings.
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    I'm starting to suspect Trump is TRYING to have the worst presidency ever. It's like The Producers, but with, somehow, even more Nazis.
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    You haven’t truly lived until you’ve seen a creationist declare, in front of God and everyone, that no one has ever successfully eaten an egg.
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    Happy Thursday! Please enjoy this, a form of brain failure of which I was hitherto unaware: MEDIEVAL MOTORCYCLE TRUTHERISM.
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    Replying to @kagredon
    "Though the monument was completed in 1897, it was not dedicated until 1945." [scene: Des Moines Capitol building, 1944] Old Iowan: "Okay, my fellow Iowans, I've been practicing my dedication speech, and THIS time I'll definitely boobs the... dammit, okay, next year."
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    "If scientists are so smart, then why don't they just inject chimpanzees full of fossils until they shapeshift into humans?" I'll tell you why: COWARDICE.
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    CAN WE GET A FUCK YEAH FOR KATIE GODDAMNED BOUMAN, THE MOTHERFUCKING SPACE WIZARD RESPONSIBLE FOR HUMANITY'S FIRST LOOK AT A GODDAMNED BLACK HOLE
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    Perhaps you've seen flat-Earthers post this map. It proposes that beyond the Antarctic ice wall lies a buttload of hitherto undiscovered continents, the raddest of which is Thoth the Moving Island, which scuds around the secret ocean like a billion-billion ton Sea-Doo.
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    I have yet to see a flat-Earther that isn't a die-hard Trump fan. It's almost as if there's a strong correlation between "being incredibly stupid" and "being incredibly stupid."
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    I think I've started to come around on Twitter's new 280-character limit. Without the change, this creationist would've had to stop before he got to the bit where he's SHOUTING ABOUT GNOMES.
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    This is what it looks like when two bluechecks disagree on how bluechecky they want to be today.
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    "Don't look, baby," I whisper to the astrophysicist, holding him tight to my chest. My tears drip into his hair. "Don't look. It... it'll all be over soon."