Pinned
As a Black person, when you encounter a person mopping (especially a lady) in a building or supermarket and you NEED to pass there, there is a process:
1. You bow your head
2. You apologise sincerely
3. You become a ballerina.
The Emperor Of Umlazi
123.6K posts
The Emperor Of Umlazi
@MaBlerh
#LongLiveAkhumziJezile Welcome. We're all about peace, laughter, mutual respect & most importantly, kindness here. #ManCity Bookings: [email protected]
- I have watched many series and seen some very unhinged female characters. She remains my favourite. Remember when she stood up, picked up her husband’s corpse, changed his tie, in the church, in the middle of the sermon because she hated the colour? 🤣
- Another problem with having kids is that it doesn't end. You'll be in your 70s trying to enjoy your last days on earth in peace and a 40 year old man will look at you in the eye and call you Baba/Ma. Hhayi leave me alone. 😭
- When I turned 13 my mom sat me down and gave me a brief. She said (in Zulu), “you are about to enter a stage. You are gonna want to act crazy. The problem with that is that I’m better at it. Let’s keep the peace by self regulating and we will get through this.”. It worked. 🤣🤣
- This might be beneficial for the mom but not necessarily for the baby. I'm that baby, let me explain: - You spend your 30s burying your entire family. - The age gap between you and your siblings/cousins makes it a bit difficult to connect. 60 year old cousins.The benefits of having a baby at 47
00:00 - In high school, we all had that "my husband is rich and I don't have to be here" teacher and she was everyone's fave. 😁
- I know all the adults will agree with me on this one: The paper towel is the unsung hero of the kitchen.
- Women are not wired to nag. If you are constantly being nagged in a relationship, it means you are constantly not doing what you said you will do and you're aren't communicating as to why you haven't done it yet. My 2c.
- This kid would be a brilliant teacher. He just solved the mystery (for me) of how people do this dance in under 30 seconds. I will see you guys at groove! 😤Another day another #Southaaaa talented child taking their place in the world 🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 @bikosmanna teaching @JHudShow #TswalabamDance we are gone...
00:00 - If I call for a plumber, electrician, mechanic, builder or locksmith and they arrive in this bad boy, I immediately conclude: - Decades of experience - His father did the same job - Work will be done properly 😁
- In my younger days, I would have written a long list. Now that I'm grown and wiser, the answer is NOTHING. Most parents do their best instilling discipline, respect, kindness, etc and still a turd comes out.
- The best way to drive from GP to KZN is to leave GP at 3am. 9am you are by the beach eating breakfast.
- Let me explain Joburg traffic to anyone that doesn’t live in Joburg: Work is 15mins away and I need to get there by 8:30am. If I leave the house at 7:45am, I get there at 8:45am. If leave at 7am, I get there at 8:40am If I leave at 6:30am, I get there at 7am. 🫠
- Johannesburg is such an interesting place. You can live within a 10km radius with someone you know and not see them for 2 years. Not even bump into them at the shops.
