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Joey Santore
@JoeySantore
Producer of Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't. Botany, Taxonomy, Evolution, Toilet Humor. 6 out of 10 PhD candidates can't stand me. Kill the Lawn Within Yourself.
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Joined August 2019
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14.5K
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  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    May 6, 2023
    Chicago River Snapper aka Chonkosaurus. Great to see this beast thriving here on what was once such a toxic river, but is slowly getting cleaned up & restored. Somebody planted a bunch of native plants up the river from here, too. I can only wonder this things been eating.
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    926K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Oct 24, 2023
    The destruction of this Arizona Golf course is as beautiful as a mountaintop sunset. This will be the new happy thought that I keep close to me in times of strife.
    user avatar
    Em Casey
    @emcaseyturf
    Oct 22, 2023
    Come along with me on my carnage (I mean course) check this morning. What should be one of the most beautiful golf courses in the country is being destroyed by herds of javelina. If anyone has a contact in AZ state govt that can help us find a solution please pass it along.
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    214K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Jun 29, 2023
    News Media acts so nonchalantly about the fact that a gigantic swath of boreal forestland in North America is on fire right now, with smoke choking out cities hundreds of miles away. THESE FORESTS ARENT SUPPOSED TO BURN. We are the next mass extinction event.
    283K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Jul 7, 2024
    This is insane. A species of Asteraceae (Heterosperma pinnatum) changes what kind of seeds it produces according to local growing conditions. If conditions are lousy, seeds with wind-dispersal structures are produced so the next generation can get the hell out of there.
    95K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Mar 26, 2023
    Rescuing hundreds of rare cacti for replanting that grow no place else in the US except South Texas as the state-funded border wall destroys thousands of acres of habitat for a fence that will do nothing to stop true criminals or cartels.
    64K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Dec 18, 2022
    It would be hard to find a more uncharismatic plant than Trithuria submersa if you tried. Yet this plant, long mistaken to be a grass, is one of the most ancient lineages of flowering plants still alive, situated right after Amborella on the angiosperm family tree.
    68K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    May 27, 2023
    The Legend of Chonkosaurus..She's back, w/ a friend. Somebody from Paddle Rat Collective Chicago, a group of kayakers that frequently lurks on the Chicago river sent this to me today... looking like the same old giant sand bag posted up on the rusty chains and rotting pylons...
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    103K
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    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Jul 20, 2022
    Still one of the most stunningly cool plants I've encountered - the high Andean carrot Azorella compacta (Apiaceae) at 13,000' in Northern Chile. It displays all the evolutionary traits selected for by high dry environments - thick waxy cuticle, low-growing matted habit, etc
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    May 15, 2022
    The Great Welwitschia mirabilis, occupying a narrow coastal strip of barren desert inundated every morning with dense fog due to the cold Benguela current off the coast a few miles away. The only other plant here is Arthraerua leubnitziae, a shrubby succulent Amaranth.
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Dec 9, 2021
    The world's only parasitic conifer, Parasitaxus usta, in the incredibly dark & humid forests of New Caledonia in February '20. This plant parasitizes another member of the family Podocarpaceae, Falcatifolium taxoides. It lacks chlorophyll & its berry-like cones are sky-blue.
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Jul 26, 2023
    Starting filming on Kill Your Lawn Season 2 in September. Its going to be in Chicago. If you live within 10 or 20 miles of Chicago, have a large lawn & you're ready to kill the shit out of it & install a native plant garden, please email [email protected]
    50K
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Oct 17, 2021
    One of the coolest evolutionary adaptations I've seen is the "herbivory mimicry" seen in the leaves of Babiana cuneata (Iridaceae) seen here. This geophyte from South Africa avoids being gnawed on by producing truncate leaves that look like they've already been gnawed on.
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Oct 27, 2022
    STOP BLOWING MY MIND. This is a moth that has evolved to look like a wasp. The adaptive benefit inherent in resembling a predatory insect that can also pack a painful sting to any vertebrate should be obvious.
  • user avatar
    Joey Santore
    @JoeySantore
    Apr 12, 2022
    Agave gentryi is a massive bastard of a plant that grows at high elevations (11,000') in the mountains of Northern Mexico. After a few decades of photosynthesis, it flowers once then dies. It will flower all summer and provide sugar for hummingbirds,moths, bees, flies,etc.