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ceejay
Hetero Male Dominant, 60, GlastonburySom, United Kingdom 

Seeking intelligent sub (not doormat)

Seeking an intelligent single woman with a desire to explore her submissive side in private. All aspects of old fashioned Domestic Discipline considered including Head of Household. You must be be single, but I accept you may have familial responsibilities - I don't run from single mums. Either live within a reasonable travelling distance of Glastonbury, Somerset or be prepared to relocate.

I am 60 years old, single, slightly over-weight professional with my own house. I like spanking, slippering, strapping and caning all naughty little girls, no matter how old they may have become biologically, and comforting them afterwards. Usually after giving them a lengthy very intimate medical examination.Ihave several yearsexperience in acting out many types of role play, including (but certainly not limited to) Doctor/patient, Teacher/naughty schoolgirl, Boss/secretary and Daddy/daughter (ageplay age tween/teen).

I will go to considerable lengths to act out your deepest fantasies, and will happily buy any unis or toys etc. required. I will also pay your expenses if you want to visit. I guarantee you 100% discretion, if required, and will always respect your limits and safewords.

A LTR is a very real a possibility if the right submissive is out there.


Sorry, but I dont meet anyone without seeing a photo first.If you want to know any more all you have to do is ask.


Not interested in Male or Trans, so no need to ask.

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Submissive Male, 54
 Holt, Michigan
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New drinking game! Go on Collarspace and do a shot every time you see a phrase "Don't write to me if you..." in someone's profile.   I guarantee you are going to pass out under the table. Verified.
Bi the way , I love women too, hence pansexual.      I appreciate everyone no matter what gender you are . This isn't really as important as who you are and a mutual attraction and understanding.   For those of you looking for someone without passion and sex I'm not for you. I also don't do hookups . the lifestyle for me is about the intensity and connection, this doe happen in "one off" while we dont hsve to all that to play we definitely need common ground. A sense of humor wouldnt hurt . so many "Hetro" subies coming around sniffing   lol which is totally fine . I actually prefer my poly queer , bi folk  but is cool .    Where are all my queer  folk looking for a  Passionate Daddy  and sadist? 
str8 males I find str8 males alluring and a challenge worth pursuing. Once a str8 agrees to become intimate with you as a Bull you are in command from then on. They are threading in unknown territory and you are the guide. Get rid of labels because no labels means no limits. You must teach how to respond to a male touch and a male anatomy. Most likely they never had paid attention to another man at least not in a sexual manner. The Dom in this case must establish a real line of authority assuring total obedience and ultimate submission. Been a Top requires attitude and self assurance, something your pupil is loosing and you want to keep that uncertainty high. Depending on your  style show them how to handle your Rod and make clear how lucky they are to be guided by you to their curious journey to M2M intimacy. Be patient, there are going to be moments of hesitation but must of the time if you assume the paternal role they will become submissive enough for you to give them the first taste of a male's Rod, that will mark him forever. Teach him how to do it because he will try to do what women did to him but this is a new arena. Let him taste and taste deep to your testicles and from there the sky is the limit. At this stage there is no reciprocity, it's all about you and your pleasure. Most males will take hold of their dick as if to make sure they are males still; do not allow it, his genitals are but a maker of gender when you are present. He is now a kid to be shown what he will want from now on. Let him know how good he is progressing and how well he learns, take advantage of the natural competitivness. At this stage phallic worship rites and rituals are very effective.  If all is done right he will be the one asking to mount him and that is another story   
    11/07/2024    Take Notice    I will be unavailable until further notice.      The noted positions have not been filled ...    For those that meet preferences and follow direction       I may or may not be checking in periodically.   
Looking for a untraditional submissive/slave   Im looking for:   Someone who was born a female   Someone who enjoys pleasing   Someone that has and can communicate their desires   Someone that has "little" tendencies but also is secure when I have to handle work   Someone that does not have limitations to your body, because my Dominance is feed by being the catalyst to your extreme satisfaction and a desire to control it.   Someone must be very detailed when taking care of their hygiene   Someone must enjoy receiving and giving oral   Someone thats open to having a physical as well as emotional relationship   Someone that will try to put insecurities down and be free to be with someone that will protect and care for your heart and your body    Someone thats honest with themself and me, I will be your solace Are you or can you grown to this?                
ExxonMobil Corp has set into motion a suggestion I made to them in an email to the corporate offices. I rather laid into them for not embracing the use of hydrogen as a fuel to replace oil. Here's the response, In Baytown, Texas, they are building a chemical reactor which uses 2 componets, water and methane. There is pressure and heat applied but I can surely trust its less than the yield. The reaction produces all 8 hydrogen atoms involved. Leaving CO² which can be made solid by liquefied air. That would br dry ice as it commonly called. What this means is unlike as are told by politicians there is no power source for cars and trucks. There now is many. Composting manure will be one of those sourced, human waste both sewer and garbage. All agro byproducts even wood chips, as well as coal and other natural sources for Methane. There's a secondary win here because Methane that currently goes into the atmosphere is a serious greenhouse gas.   Hydrogen is also able to combine with Oxygen to make water and electrons. One electron per atom. This is more efficient than a battery using far less chemicals with a longer life, faster charging, and less weight allowing electric aircraft. Let not vote our way into a Putin wet dream and kill this opportunity to have an utopia.
Guess What? You've been rejected. No long explanations. No closure. No friendship offers. No “maybe later.” Just a big, bold, unapologetic NO. And don’t worry...I won’t block you. Blocking would imply I need peace from you. But I don’t. I want you to sit in the front row for my rise. I want you to watch me glow, knowing full well you’ll never touch it. I want you tormented by the fact that someone like me was once within reach,  but now I'm a constellation you’ll never map again. Consider this my final gift to you: A lifetime subscription to spectator status. Enjoy the show, peasant. This is my FUCK YOU à la mode  topped with success and served cold. As a sadist this really tickles my soul and warms my heart!  
Awaken to gentle licks upon my labia and the tickle of your facial hair on my inner thighs  You knowing my body and realizing that sucking my clit is not what gets me going  But that gentle tongue massage on my lower lips causes me to softly moan and drip with wetness  I'm in the euphoria of emotional bliss  Slow intense grinding along with the need to run  I'm about to explode  What a way to wake up,  as the main course I've trained you well and you know how to please  Now, I will lay you back, tie you up, or leave you free  I know before I'm done you'll be screaming please!
i tried to put this in my main profile but, for some reason, the system would not let me so i am putting it here.  i am BiSexSubBurl which sums up my BDSM life in a nutshell.
One of the most interesting aspects of the whole femdom experience is that it is an immersion, not a series of scenes. As in any serious relationship, trust is vital. When a sub gives himself to a Mistress, he will bare his soul in a way that he will never have experienced before. It is a serious commitment and it will take time to evolve. And it might be a slow process as you both figure out what each of you requires from this relationship. But when you get to where you each need to be, you may wonder why you have never found this nirvana before. And I suspect that is because finding this bliss point is a rarity. Many spend a lifetime looking for it, many settle for compromise. Sometimes you think you have found it, only for it to slip away. But as The Rolling Stones put it, "You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you might find you'll get what you need" 
I'm a masochist and only interested in play with sadists.  Into spanking of all kind, domestic discipline, cage and leash play, degradation, humiliation, and more. I have a desire to be controlled. I want to be told what to do and how to do it every step of the way. And I need to be severely punished for any disobedience or imperfection. I find it fun to fear of anyone that I play with. I respond well to doms that get off on making me make me obey ignoring my comfort. I try not to be bratty, but if I do, and proper correction quickly silences me. I also sometimes serve as a hir .ed house maid for short trips. I clean and do any chores required.  I'm happy to travel anywhere for the right person. Tell me how I could serve you.
I did the annual update of my profile to adjust my age (I still wonder why that doesn't just happen automatically here) and checked my profile to confirm that it took, which it did. Upon scrolling down past my interests list, I noticed something: two animated icons that I'd never seen before.One, in blue, showed a woman looking up and holding a hand out. The mouse-over text read, "Godess to be worshipped." The other, in gold, showed a shining crown. I put my cursor over it and read, "Soverign to be obeyed." *blink* I looked at several men's profiles and saw no such additions. I looked at two other women's profiles and only saw the crown icon once. So, yeah. That happened.
If you get ghosted it might not be what you think. Did you realise that this site does not store your password any more. If you log out as a new member  you can't ever log back in. I found this out by trying to log in on a different machine. Not possible.  I don't know if this is a cynical move to get more numbers by the owners of the site, but I think they just broke it and are too stupid to fix it.    
There's always a debate on what a sissy is. I found this diion and it's pretty accurate for me:   I think you are more suited to being kept as a submissive fetish sissy. When most people talk about a shemale they mean a girl who has a cock - a girl who uses her cock... A frilly fetish sissy is something else entirely. A fetish sissy is not even allowed to have a cock - we call it her clitty and we treat it like a clitty - keeping it in locked chastity. The more needy (horny) a fetish sissy gets, the more she becomes controlled by her clitty and quite quickly she finds herself doing utterly humiliating things to please her superiors without so much as a whimper - in fact, she often begs for more of the same. She is overwelmed with the desire to suck cocks or be bent over to be butt fucked to obtain her erotic pleasure. To become a submisive creature that wants men to subjugate her and use her to satisfy all their sexual desires and perversions. Using her and sissifying her as a sexual toy for their pleasure and orgasmic release. Her oral and anal slut holes just cock receptacles to be filled with hot cum. A sissy sexslave as it were, obediently doing everything she is told no matter how humiliating it might be. Her desire for utter and total submission and humiliation compels her to obey without question. If you google shemale, youll be directed to sites of TS girls fucking males. If you google sissy, youll find frilly little creatures, often dressed in extremely fetish feminine attire getting fucked by a strap-on cock or a real mans cock. Often the sissy is on her knees submissively sucking a mans cock like a good sissy cumslut. I think you are the latter. I think you are a submissive fetish sissyslut. I think what you need is to have every trace of male left in you removed until you are hopelessly feminine in the most exaggerated ways possible. Totally transed into a hot sexy slave bitch, then dressed, displayed and used as one. Your clitty needs to be locked away and the only way you would be allowed to find orgasmic relief is by being penetrated with stiff hungry cock or a dildo. Your libido and lust turned inward, your slutty desires only satisfied by phallic anal insertion or a mouth full of hard cock. Soon you will find your hips wantonly grinding up to meet your penetrator to attain your orgasmic femme sissy relief. Soon you will crave the company of dominant horny males seeking to use you as a cock slut for their pleasure and perversions. Now picture yourself like that - deliriously horny - tightly corsetted, locked in a chastity belt with large butt plug stretching your rosebud and filling your bottom, dressed in frills, garters, nylons, panties, petticoats, short revealing skirts, fetish leather or rubber, open ass hobble skirts, locked in the steepest stiletto high heels or ballet boots, ribbons, satin, latex and lace, often humiliated even in public. Often kept in some form of restrictive bondage, your will or choice to resist your male suitors completely removed. Forced to submit to horny men orally and anally on a regular basis, transed into a willing and wanton cocksucking cumslut sissy Does that sound like you? Yes it most certainly does.  
My parents have accidentally almost killed my dog. Twice.  I had a small surgery yesterday and they are here to "help." Twice now they have put their stash of daily old people pills in places easily accessible to the puppy and the bags ended up in her mouth. Last night she chewed a hole in the bag and for sure ate a fish oil pill. It's questionable as to if she ate a piece of a beta blocker. Luckily I caught her before she could gobble up any others, and she seems to be alright. Holy shit though, that was close. The closing conversation went something like this: Me: Can you keep the bags on the counter where she can't reach them? Parent: I'll keep them in my pocket. Me: Can you keep them on the counter since we know she can't reach them? Parent: I'll keep them in my pocket. Me: Can you keep them on the counter?  Parent: Yes.  Me: *trying to keep my cool, not kick my parents out of my house early, monitoring my dog for signs of beta blocker consumption, oh, and fucking staying awake since I just took pain medicine* Some of us are not going to make it through the week if I don't stay hyper fucking vigilant. At this point in my life I'm okay with becoming an orphan if necessary.
== Results from bdsmtest.org ==  100% Masochist  100% Rope bunny  100% Slave  100% Submissive  91% Degradee  89% Experimentalist  82% Exhibitionist  77% Pet  62% Primal (Prey)  59% Non-monogamist  40% Voyeur  15% Vanilla  0% Daddy/Mommy  0% Rigger  0% Ageplayer  0% Brat  0% Brat tamer  0% Degrader  0% Dominant  0% Boy/Girl  0% Master/Mistress  0% Owner  0% Primal (Hunter)  0% Sadist  0% Switch   
I have been spending way too much money because it's super easy to click click and have it all delivered. I decided a few days ago that I would muster through No Spend July. Day one and I have already broken. Tomorrow isn't look all that great, either. You think you have everything you need, and then you realize all of the good stuff is at the store. A girl has needs, yo.  On another note, none of my remotes in the bedroom have batteries in them. I know what you're thinking, but it's rechargeable. Where have they gone? 
Smart, successful, strong and structured.  I wasn't born this way, these attributes were my choice.  As such I don't overlook or yield these principles to anyone.  If these are not qualities that you admire in grown men please move on.   I'm straight forward and I expect the same.  If picture swaps, video calls, or personal meetings are a hard line for you then I am not the one.  If you get together with me you will be giving up the PT&A.  If that's not an issue keep going.  I may be good conversation and a well of knowledge, but I am here to find another partner, not a chill buddy.  I work hard and need an outlet.  I don't intend for you or this site to consume me or my time.  This simply means that I may not be on as often as someone with a lot of extra time on his hands.  I have many differing likes, yearnings, ambitions, and needs to be satisfied.  I'm interested in hearing your's.   J²
Well its week after the Montreal Fetish weekend and I can't help but to get depressed after being immersed in an environment which Is so conducive to acceptance. Having some impact play with VagaBound in the VIP dungeons was a breath of fresh air and him doing the photo shoots for me on the streets of Montreal And especially a City like Montreal that welcomes you so well being fetish and kink and being able to so freely excepted doing photo shoots around and on the streets of Montreal was inspiring. I cannot wait till next year MFW 2025 to create more content and hopefully I find the owner as the Rubber sub and Rubber Doll i am that can consume me and complete my existence. Its been a long journey. I am trying to concentrate on the next events that are ahead of me like Folsom Kink street fair SF September 29th 2024 and then DOMMETRIPS Cozumel Mexico October 5th to October 12th. As a early 57th birthday present. Then I also have to find a costume ball or event for Halloween for September. To go full latex Cat hood, catsuit too. Need to keep the constant rush happening for the adrenaline rush and excitement showing the rubber doll in me.  I am also have my attention on Claiming my tickets for MFW 2025 when they go on sale January and Fetish factory Florida Anniversary 5 day event 2025.
strength is gone I am so done being strong im breaking and shattering like a broken mirror i cant stand this feeling im breaking down and i am so annoyed with myself but taking it out on everyone around me as i lay here tonight theres not much more i can take the tears are shedding and my self confidence is non existing just what i fucking need im still breathing so i guess thats an upside but fuck it all im so done pretending that im okay and if you cant accept me the way i am than whats the point of being my friend im just so over it
Upon His Knees   He kneels upon the plush carpet, time etched in silver at his temples, A devoted servant to her throne of silk and shadow. Her hands, adorned with crimson, guide him gently down, To where her essence calls like honeyed nectar.   With reverence, he parts the petals of her bloom, Tongue tracing ancient patterns of worship and surrender. Each lap a prayer, each flick a testament to his devotion, As she arches above him, goddess of his universe.   Her fingers tangle in his graying hair, a crown of submission, While waves of pleasure ripple through her sovereign form. He drinks eagerly from her chalice, deep and sweet, Lost in the sacred ceremony of flesh and power.   Her thighs, strong and commanding, frame his weathered face, A throne room where his service finds its highest purpose. Her moans are royal decrees that echo through his soul, As he worships at the altar of her divinity.
First Impressions After I posted about being stood up for my first meet-and-greet / coffee date in years, a few folks seemed to question my lack of anger, or at least my sort of perky take on it.   Let me explain. There’s a saying, “No answer is still an answer.”    A first meeting, like a coffee date, is a first impression. Being a no-show without announcing one is bailing before the scheduled time is … significant. It can indicate a lot of things: a tendency to make bad choices poor time management skills  bad luck streak passive-aggressive tendencies  tolerance testing This last one is particularly significant. Last week was not the first time someone ghosted me and then promptly started asking for a 2ⁿᵈ chance. Complying would have set a precedent: how many times can someone test my patience, fail to keep up their end of a deal before I walk?   The guy could’ve written me earlier, he could’ve taken a ride share. He did neither.   He told me that he was currently experiencing a bad turn in his life. Okay, but why decide to drag a new person into that? Misery loves company?   I showed up, and as a quirk of timing gave him slightly longer than the 15 minutes I’d originally allotted for him to show or at least communicate. I did my part, and thus I have nothing to prove.    If this was a test of his, I’m fine with failing. I racked up some serious points that day. 
Just Like This ..... Where'd you wanna go? How much you wanna risk? I'm not looking for somebody With some superhuman gifts Some superhero Some fairytale bliss Just something I can turn to Somebody I can kiss I want something just like this...
This online text stuff is hard. I used to say it was like playing darts blindfolded when the only chance of success is hitting the bullseye. Now I think it is harder.....more like playing pool blindfolded..First you have to connect with the cue ball, then that cue ball needs to find the right ball, before directing it into the right pocket. So some fine detail of your profile will trip you up. Then an answer will be misinterpreted. God forbid you express a desire that is not spot on. Why is this community so judgemental in early exchanges?  
Very few Doms know my capabilities, especially sexually. When I say my libido is more like a man, I mean it. I think about sex a lot, I'm easily aroused, I cum fairly quickly, and I'm usually one and done. As exciting and sexual as this sounds, when I don't have a Dominant to please, it's actually...well, just necessary. To keep my sexuality  up and ready, to keep my libido high (use it or lose it), and to keep away some really base cravings, I have to attend to my drive as a part of self care. Ha! Sounds sexy, but sometimes it just makes me feel lonely.  I miss the Doms who know that part of me, and hope I can meet and become one with new potential partners who will know me that well too. 
A few things that got left out of my profile. I do have a preferred age.range and very few exceptions are made. No offense to you if you are not one of those. If your profile or messages mention oral, we are not compatible.  I am not monogamous,  but I expect my partner to be.  I am aware that is greedy and not ok with everyone.  This list will probably grow as I think of things.   
Are Christianity and BDSM Incompatible?Well I think the short answer would have to be I think not, or I wouldnt, as a Born Again Christian, be here. But it's a question I get asked a lot on here and other sites, from other Christians who aren't sure, from the curious, and the argumentative, so I thought I would address it permanently. I think the Bible is pretty clear that wives are to defer to their husbands - 'Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall have authority over you',  'wives, submit to your husbands' It is also clear that married couples may do as they wish, as long as its just between the two 'the marriage bed is undefiled', So the question really should be, can unmarried Christians be into BDSM? Well I think it would be difficult to go from an unmarried independent woman to a married sub, so I dont see a difficulty with a woman being submissive to the man she is considering marriage with. Personally I dont have sex with every man I am involved with, as I think sex is special, but I am naturally submissive, so I have certainly submitted to more men than Ive had sex with. It works for me. But ultimately if you really are unsure, and a Christian, you should listen to what you think God is saying to you If youre not at peace with your decision, then it may be the wrong decision for you
Hey there! I hope your doing well today! I am new here and trying to find some like minded people who are looking to talk and just make friends wether it's in person or just online! I know it's out of the blue but it's hard to find anyone who is into this lifestyle, I'm not here looking to exchange nudes or anything like that I just want some genuine people to talk too! I'm also from ireland I know it says America but its not 😂😂 sorry if I bored you! and you didn't make it this far! but hope to hear from you soon 
1/14/26 You, as a submissive, should make the first move. I won't chase your submission. I only want a sub/slave that serves me because they feel I'm worthy of that service...not because they're scared or intimidated into it. If you want to see if we could work well together, then ask for me to email you The Form™️. I will ask anyone interested in serving me to fill out The Form™️, which is very much a job application. Since I'm on CS primarily to locate a long-term sub/slave, The Form™️ could be the most important job application of your life. It's big, it's detailed, it's invasive... and it's a test. If you're not up to completing it, then you're not up to handling me and the service I desire. But if you are, then buckle up and enjoy the ride! ;)   ~~Blue (=
I am in need of a very long term slave to fully and loyally serve me in all aspects. For me this is not about toys or play scenes.  It is real life with real life expectations.  I am fully aware of my duties and responsibilities as a owner. I have owned several slaves in the past. Some were short term. Some no longer wished a life as a slave. And one decided that she would prefer serving a different master. None with the commitment to serve no matter what the future holds. That is the one I search for.
I must be doing something wrong because ever since covid come along nobody wants to talk to anybody real time I mean I just bought a house in Mississippi moved from New Orleans a beautiful house by the way I'm very proud of and I was going to use it for a dream home of because I'm trans and I have other attributes I mean I'm a disabled veteran I wear diapers and fortunately for me my my Uncle Sam decides to keep me stocked and anyway I don't know what's wrong with people nobody has conversations anymore it's just these one line sentences no pictures it's just really is everybody running that scared I don't know maybe I'll see if this makes any hits I mean it's not very interesting but I'm just like since journals are back I'm just trying to see how it works out with me see if it actually shows up so anyway hope everybody is having a great holiday you know Halloween anyway look forward to hearing from anybody that wants to have a real time conversation I mean I don't even know what I mean anymore I haven't talked to another human being since covid except that the VA clinic and stuff but anyway with all that said ciao for now
Question: I would be interested to hear about your journeys and how you navigated finding your D/s type. ANSWER: In my experience, it can be an occasionally rewarding, but largely difficult and frustrating journey. But then I guess a lot depends on who you are (I mean, really are as a person and what you expect/seek). At its best is more honest and intimate than anything else I know, but then it can also be hugely intolerant and judgemental too - something of an irony to my mind. There is such a broad spectrum of interests and needs that simple labels - no matter how many there are - are not sufficient. Unless you identify as a victim and ride like flotsam on the tides of kink, it is important to know yourself. If you don't know you, how do you expect anyone else to?? Mine has been a long journey, the most recent insight being that I am an empath, albeit an unusual one. Knowing this now makes so much sense of things in past, both in BDSM and vanilla life. But I know I am still processing it all and have a way to go. I will leave you with two thoughts: Through BDSM, one is made aware of who one truly is. This may not be who they thought they were, who they want to be or even who they think they should be, but it will be them. (and more controversial) Everyone (dominants and submissives) is damaged in some way - not always obviously and often not admitted even to themselves - and this will have bearing on how they contribute to and what they take from BDSM. The links are not simple linear ones, but they are always there. Understanding one's own damage is healthy. Understanding the damage of a potential partner is enlightening. And finally, when you find a place, however brief, you will feel with intensity and know what it is to be alive!
I have come to realize ... I'm fucked up I have recently set up 2 different play dates with 2 different people and I flaked each time. I'm super horny and fucking needy as hell, but I couldn't understand what was giving me cold feet. Then I realized these were mostly vanilla men (in the BDSM sense they both were POCs like me) or it would be non kink sex. Just thinking about having normal sex at this point makes me wanna cry. I didn't realize how much I miss bdsm and just being fully in it and controlled. I get that I'm kinda pathetic in this sense but I can't help it. I kinda wish no more talks just take and do, control and force ...   I think I'm the only girl in the world who would be forced collared and above by it. I mean I actually did once. Sighs
As someone recently pointed out (Thankyou !!!!), I havent updated my Journal on here for a LONG time. Not since "Collarme" days for those of you who've been on the site for a while may recall. So heres a quick update! Having recovered from 2 bout of Covid and Long Covid, a year out of work through the lockdowns, and a reticence to "get back out there" that i've finally overcome, I'm looking to get back into the scene this year! My last relationship ended sadly at the end of 2018, and while I'm happy on my own, I'm missing the lifestyle. So next month I plan to visit the BBB again, maybe refresh my "bag of  tricks" as one lady called it. And plan to pop along to some local munches too. and maybe along the way find someone to share some fun times with. Who knows. C    
Random (consensual) bondage fantasy:   The room is dark and quiet, lit only with some kind of blacklight, and maybe some creepy ambient bass-heavy background music is playing. The room is full of mirrors, which allows me to see both my perfectly done makeup and the bonds restricting my movements I'm bound by heavy rubber inflatable inner tubes from my chest (right below my bra) all the way down to my ankles, my arms pinned tightly to my sides and each ring fitting its respective section of my body snugly enough that I can't move an inch. They're also so thick once fully pumped up that my feet don't touch the ground. I'm left on the floor face down, unable to do anything except attempt to rock side to side or look in the mirror to see my pouty red lips wrapped firmly around my ball gag.  This whole time I can also feel the stretch of the buttplug that was put in me before I was put in the constricting grip of my inflatable bonds. My dom eventually enters the room, clad from head to toe in a heavy rubber catsuit and a latex hood that completely hides his face, saying little beyond asking if I'm ready for the load he's been saving all week, to which I affirmatively moan around the ball gag. He casually rolls me over so I'm lying face up, taking the ball gag out of my mouth before he unzips his crotch, pulls out his cock and kneels down and straddles my face.  He proceeds to slowly thrust into my mouth while I wrap my lips as tight as I can around his shaft, unable to do much more in my distended bonds, his movements gradually increasing in pace until he blows a huge load directly in my mouth, spurting one shot after another into the back of my throat while I do my best to hold it all in my mouth. He then pulls his cock from my mouth with a loud pop and tells me to open my mouth and show him the cum.  I open my mouth and show him the copious pool of semen in my mouth, playing with it until he tells me to swallow it all.  He then tells me he'll be back for more before he exits the room, leaving me still bound and unable to clean off any cum that may have spilled out of my mouth. He then comes back half an hour later, already ready to use my mouth again, but this time he props me sitting up against the wall so that he can get a better angle, and then proceeds to fuck my face again until he blows another load. He then leaves again, leaving me sitting slumped and bound against the wall. He eventually comes back one more time, brining me back to the floor turning me over so that I'm face down again and removing the inner tubes trapping my lower body in order to have access to my ass.  He slowly pulls down the back of my panties, takes out the buttplug and begins to finger me with a gloved hand, edging me with his fingers alone as he intermittently and quietly asks me questions about sucking his cock and about whether I want to cum, with me moaning and answering in the affirmative as he uses his edging to make me subtly beg.  He then pulls out his cock (and puts on a condom and plenty of lube) and proceeds to fuck me, using the inner tubes still binding my upper body as a makeshift cushion as his cock gets even harder and eventually swells and pulsates inside of me until I cum all over myself inside the front of my panties while he fills up the condom, finally spent once and for all. He helps me out of my bondage, never removing his mask or catsuit until I'm gone, going only by the pseudonym he gave me and the calling card he left for the next time I want to help him relieve some stress.
100% Primal (Hunter)100% Dominant100% Exhibitionist100% Sadist100% Rigger100% Degrader95% Owner95% Voyeur88% Master/Mistress
Some Say... Wow, they haven't allowed us journals since 2016...amazing to have this back... Well then, everyone, welcome to my journal!  Back in the years gone by I used to use this to put out some Dominant wisdom I've gained through my, now, 26 years of BDSM experience and would now like to do the same. Please, if you've read my profile, don't hesitate to reach out as I love to help and provide information, advise, or general guidance to those who might want it or even those with just a question they would like to see answered. If I can answer it, I will, either in a journal entry or just in private if you prefer but in any event it is something I love to do as a Dominant so I'm happy to be able to get back to it!
  Copy-paste messages? Really?? Congratulations! You've just been delivered the Kiss of Death section. At the exact moment you should be putting forth real effort to make a first impression, you show me you're too lazy to even try. And the best part? You actually expect authentic engagement from me while you vomit recycled garbage into my inbox. Pathetic. I don't entertain laziness, and I certainly don't reward it. Goodbye.    
Based on a previous relationship some time ago: Saturday Night Sunday Morning   It’s raining outside and I curse it for keeping me awake, a lie to myself as I know I never really sleep when you are out. I reach to turn on the light beside the bed and am reminded of the lock you have on me as it rubs my upper thigh. The clock tells me it’s coming upto 2:30 in the morning.   I roll onto my back wondering if you are asleep in the bed you have chosen for the evening, asleep in the arms of another. Or perhaps not asleep, in which case you will be ……….. occupied.   I try to put those thoughts out of my mind, and fail.   Thoughts of you crowd my mind whenever you are from me, thoughts of the curve of your thigh, the look in your in your eye, the taste of you, the way your waist tapers just above your hips, god that makes you so fuckable.   It’s coming up to three in the morning now and I have convinced myself that you are asleep after your exertions.   Your exertions…….. I can’t stop thinking of what you could be doing with whoever he is, in my mind’s eye I see you on all fours with your back arched receiving him your face wracked with the pure pleasure of it, I have seen that look when you are approaching the peak of your orgasm. It’s an addictive sight and a special reward for the man who gives it to you.   I decide to get up and get myself something, descending to the kitchen in a bath robe. With each step I take on the stairs I feel the weight of your restraining lock on me. It’s been ten days now and I have never felt so ripe, kept swollen and aching for you right down to the root of me.   In the kitchen I can see the dark rain running down the window panes as I make myself a cup of tea, coffee would be such a bad move right now.   I sit on a kitchen stool looking at a picture of you laughing and smiling with friends, the image captured is a night out and you are looking so elegant, so beautiful so enticing.   As I sip my tea I find myself gazing at your smile, you have such beautiful lips. My eyes follow their curve to the corners of your mouth. I feel myself absorbed in your every detail.   I love kissing you, feeling you on my lips, your wet tongue penetrating my mouth. One of those intimacy fixes that I crave so desperately. I can’t keep at bay the thought of how those lips have been occupied this evening.   I finish my tea and wash out the cup placing it on the drainer.   The rain seems to be subsiding, with daylight but a short time away I turn out the light and return to bed.   It’s nearly four in the morning and I find myself curled up around a pillow, every now and then rocking my hips into it, but it just makes me ache more.   As I close my eyes I feel so desperate for you to return to me.   The first few hours of dawn have past before the sun has risen to the point where it shines through the window and wakes me. It’s bright and shiny and fresh, the only signs of the nights rain is the dark wet dampness of the soil.   I look at the clock it’s nearly nine thirty, so I rise with a degree of haste to wash, shave and brush my teeth. Before donning my bathrobe again and descending once more into the kitchen.   As I am buttering my toast I hear you come through the door and my heart skips a beat. It’s that cusp of turmoil with thoughts of how you have spent your evening competing with the joy of your return to me.   I hear your heels clicking towards the kitchen as I turn towards the door, seeing you framed in the doorway, hair loosely brushed, braless under your blouse, a flush of red to your cheeks and a coy smile adorning your lips.   You walk upto me placing a hand behind my neck a fingertip or two running back and forth over that spot that you know makes my knees buckle. You hold my gaze for what feels like an eternity looking into my soul through my eyes. I can’t help but lower my gaze and look at your lips before you kiss me.   Its deep, passionate, consuming and ……….. musky.   Your other hand slips into my bathrobe as your fingers fondle the lock you have placed on me. I can’t help but give out a small gasp. As you break away from me.   “Make me a cuppa darling will you” you say as you turn to walk into the living room. I watch you from behind as you walk back through the doorway once again framed, your perfect silhouette accentuated in heels, hold up stockings and a short skirt.   Minutes later I follow you into the living room with a tray laden with cups and pots and hot toast, you are sat on the sofa with your phone texting someone.   As I place the tray on the coffee table you lower your phone, reach forward and take me by the arm. You are smiling and bring me towards you pulling down my arm indicating that you want me to take my position kneeling before you. My body slips into compliance as I kneel looking up at you.   You start to stroke my face and I feel my head tilting to feel your full caress.   “Mmm nice shave” you say as you grip my chin with your fingers tilting my head up as you lean forward and kiss me once again a slow roving kiss with your tongue exploring my mouth as your hand slips behind my head. Your lips slip away from mine “mmm you taste minty fresh” you say.   I am just gazing up at you lost in your eyes.   You lean forward and whisper into my ear “he dropped me off at the door darling, he found our place very easily” before returning to kiss me with passion and purpose. You disengage and then whisper in my other ear.   “I sucked him off in the car before he left”.   The deep pang that it creates in me is merged with my overwhelming desire for you and I feel lost, not knowing which way to turn.
This is a short story i wrote a couple of years ago . . Is your life really that empty? Maybe the best words I have ever spoken Is your life really that empty? That may be the best opening line since ‘.......I was born in 1518 in the village of Glenfinnan on the shores of Loch Shiel. And I am immortal'. In truth maybe not, but these words got me here, pressing keys on my pc’s keyboard about to tell my story. A good opening line, true, although not a good place to start my tale, so, where to begin? Who I am, where I was when I first saw her or the reason I spoke those words? Maybe to ground this thing would be best, I am male, a Dom, a sadist, not rich, not powerful, slightly artistic, getting to be older than I want to be living in a small suburb of a small city in the English Midlands. It was a Tuesday, early afternoon and I was on a coach going to Nottingham to check out an art gallery to see if they would exhibit, or sell, some pieces of my work. Don’t get all excited thinking I am a master painter or sculptor selling pieces for hundreds of thousands of pounds (yes pounds and not dollars) I sell my work for between £100 – 200 if I am lucky enough to find a buyer.Anyway, I first saw the girl, woman, standing on the platform along with others, waiting for our coach to arrive and noticed her because she fell into that style of female I like, slim, simple hair style, makeup tending towards the Goth, in jeans, ankle boots and a soft leather jacket and no handbag – simple pleases me. I am a good and sadistic Dom but I am no good at talking to females I do not know in vanilla situations so I took in her images, filed it under, ‘what a shame’ and then as the coach arrived I entered and walked to the back and sat down only to find she followed and sat in the seat in front of me on the other side of the isle. As we pulled out of the station I saw her take out a book, find her place, about a third of the way through, and begin to read. To say my mental image of her was shattered would be far too extreme but I was so disappointed in her. If she was vanilla it was such a pointless thing to read and if into my ‘lifestyle’ a really sad thing to read and I didn’t know which was worse. I tried to ignore her, and the book, as the minutes ticked by.  I watched houses and trees and cars pass by before we reached the dual carriageway, connecting the two cities, and the coach built up speed. I noticed all other passengers were seated nearer the front leaving at least seven rows of empty seats between us and them and I decided this was the universe telling me to do something – the universe seldom tells me to do things in case you were wondering. I moved across the back seat until I was slightly to her left but still behind her and said in a normal speaking voice, not too loud, not too quiet, “Is your life really that empty?"I accept this could be a very insulting thing to say to anyone especially a stranger on a bus but the words formed and so were spoken. She lifted her head from the book but did not turn around, I could see her face from where I sat and her mouth turned down slightly, not in a frown but in a puzzled thoughtful way and lowering the book to her knees she said, “Why do you say that?" "I am a Dom and a sadist”, I said although not sure why I was so truthful, “I don’t usually tell people as most do not understand.” I paused waiting to see what she would do or say. "I see.” Was all she said, which didn’t give me any sort of clue or guide to what I should do or say next.  "The book does not relate to the real world of BDSM, most of us are so normal we are as boring as vanilla folk.” I saw a smile come to her face at this so continued, “It is only when we play that many of us diverge from the norm, but I suppose the same could be said of golfers or those that go tenpin bowling every week.” She laughed at this; thank god.  "How do you dominate people then, do you do it with men or woman or both?” She did not turn around as she spoke.  "Before I answer that, have you tried anything in a fetish way; are you sub or Domme or both?"  "You would certainly call me vanilla I think. Everyone is reading the book so I thought I would too.” She paused for a heartbeat and then said, “I am not sure if I would like to submit to a man, I think I might giggle too much if I had to call someone Sir or Master."  "There is much rubbish talked about BDSM, you do not need to call him Sir if that is not what you want, I have little interest in a female calling me Sir unless it comes naturally to her at a time that seems correct to use it.  "BDSM is like real life, it is not a video game, it merely has a few given rules that vary as much as any vanilla couple’s rules vary, that and blindfolds and restraints obviously"  "Something else I would not like until I trusted him enough.” She said and added “How to you write a contract?"  "I am a sadist, I like a little fear in my play, if you trusted me, or knew me too well, could you really be scared of me? I thought this was a statement too far and wondered if I was trying to sabotage this conversation. “There is even more bullshit talked about contracts.  No contract is needed by 999 out of a 1000 couples. “I say ‘do you want to play’? You answer ‘I am new to this’, I say, ‘understood’. What more needs saying?"  I watched her face, and saw a small frown crease her brow, “Remember, you have the power to stop whatever is happening by simply saying a single word, it is easier to stop what is happening in a BDSM encounter than, say, trying to get rid of some half drunk moron in a nightclub who is likely not to take no for an answer. If I do something you do not like, it ends and the play stops, it is in the skill of the Dominant one to not make you say that word."  "I don’t understand,” she said, ”if you are dominant how could I stop you doing what you want especially if I am blindfolded or tied up?"  "Blindfolded, AND tied up” I said with a smile, “I said before, BDSM is real life, if you say the stop word and the dominant one continues that is assault, or as close to it as make no difference, BDSM does not give anyone the right to, umm, go too far."  The coach stopped and two elderly couples boarded and I watch with not a little ‘fear’ as they decided where to sit, the universe was still on my side and they sat side by side 5 rows in front of the girl.  We were well passed half way to the city and I didn’t know where the girl was going, the University of Nottingham Campus would be reached in 5 minutes or so and she could easily be a student there. So as the coach moved on I said.  "It is much easier to show you, show someone I mean, what happens in BDSM play than to describe it, just like if you were going on a first date in the vanilla world you go on it and see how things progress”.  She sat for a second and then put the book back in her pocket, “Thanks for the chat but I have to get off in a couple minutes."  "Ok, I don’t usually talk like this on buses with cute females I don’t know so thank you for not running away screaming.”  I reached into my pocket and took out my business card, “I am a body piercer so I have a card, if you are bored give me a ring and maybe I can answer some more questions or, if your curiosity gets stronger, I can show you my Domly skills.” I reached forward and placed the card on her left thigh, gently pressing the card down, before taking my hand away.  She looked at it before picking it up and putting it in her pocket, so I said “I have a normal house on a normal street, although I do have a play room of sorts with some interesting things to play on and with, so if you visit you do not have to walk though a dark wood to a haunted castle."  she took this the way I hoped and laughing said, “That’s a relief, but this is my stop so bye"  "Have fun.” I said as she stood and I was very impressed, not sure why though, that as she got up and walked down the coach she didn’t look back to see who I was.  The coach stopped she got off and I thought I would not see her again and wondered if I should get off too but my commonsense won out and I sat still as we moved off. “One day I will remember to ask a females name” I said to the back of the seat in front of me and again thought ‘what a shame.'  "Good morrow.” Yes, I oft times answer the phone this way. It is Thursday at 7pm and I have been relaxing watching a video on tv.  "Hello.” A female voice replies.  A silence follows which I do not interrupt wondering if this is another recorded message asking if I want to make a personal injury claim or some other tedious drivel. “I thought reality might be better than fiction."  "Ah.” I am a sadist of few words but sometimes one has to be a little helpful, “That is easy to do, come to my home, knock on the door and then enter, all other decisions will be made for you from that point. If you wish things to stop simple say ‘Lucifer’ and I will stop whatever I am doing.  "You do like us to be scared don’t you, I thought we would be discussing what and how, not simply being told to visit."  "When you visit it will be a time of physical interactions, this will not be a time for you to serve me as a slave or for silly things like sitting at my feet waiting for permission to get up or speak."  "Ok, I just come and that’s it, you don’t want to know more about me."  "You are cute, you want to know more about submission and you called me.   That is all I need, I told you before it is for me to play without making you want, or need, to stop me; so all will be found out when you are here."  "When can I come and should I wear something specific?"  "What an entertaining fem you are, if free tonight come at 9 pm or come tomorrow at the same hour. As for clothes, if you wish to please then, as I am a male; heels, hold ups or stockings or bare legs, a thong, g-spring or nothing. Short skirt, not denim (hate denim), shirt with buttons and a skimpy bra or no bra, a coat may be wise as it is somewhat cold out."  "You sound like you have said that before, I will see what I can do and tonight would be best in case I chicken out tomorrow."  I gave her my address and added, “For your safety, and to make you feel a little more relaxed, tell your best friend you are visiting me, say about piercing if that is easier, and tell them you will call when you arrive here too. You will be safe here but it is a wise thing to be careful."  "I will see you tonight then, what should I call you."  "I will be waiting, and for tonight you can call me Demon.” I clicked the end call icon on my mobile and laughed out loud, maybe not such a waste after all.  I never plan what I am going to do with a sub, that way leads to disappointment more times than not, so I sat and watched my video till a suitable time came for me to stop it. I have a small pack of dogs so I sent all of them to their beds and went upstairs to change.  I checked to see that my playroom was ready and laid out my toys on a rack then, with 30minutes to go, had a quick shower and dressed in my Domly garb.  I decided to start the evening off on a high pressure moment, to see how she reacted, so dressed in leather trousers, knee length New Rock boots, vest and full length leather coat, all in black, obviously. To complete the attire I had recently made some leather gloves and a full hood, both with spikes and piercings, and these I put on before going downstairs.  I have a hallway leading from my front door to my kitchen with a turn to the right half way down leading to my staircase. At five to nine I turned out the light in the hall, darkness fell, I turned on the kitchen light, closing the door so only a thin sliver of light could be seen, and bought to life my cd player to beginning playing Metallica’s Black album.  I stood silently at the foot of my stairs, a still, dark shadow in the darkness, calmly wondering if she would come or not.  What a good girl she was, just after the 2nd track, ‘Sad But True’, began there as a double tap on the door.  I clenched my fists as a smile, which could not be stopped, came to my lips when the door opened and closed.  I have a tiled floor and her heels, clicked nicely five times before she appeared looking ahead towards the light in front of her.  I stepped quickly forward making a short, high pitched hiss to encourage her to turn a little towards me. Her head turned and, I am sure, she caught a glimpse of a moving darkness just before my right hand clamped over her mouth and my left arm swung over her shoulder allowing my left hand to grip her right arm, pinning her closely to my body.  "You came.” I whispered in her ear.  Her body was shaking violently and I could feel her breath coming in short, sharp, warm pants against my fingers, “Good girl, now control your breathing and relax a little, I have you safe and sound.” As I said this I used my right hand to brush her hair back over her ear and gently kissed it and, moving my head a little, I bit the lobe with just a little pressure from my teeth.  Even in her present shaken state, or maybe because of it, she let out a deep, long sigh and I felt her weight lean into me as she slumped slightly in my arms. Another gentle kiss on her ear followed by words spoken so softly they were more felt than heard, “Clever girl, pleasure and pain, fear and ecstasy and yours to enjoy or stop with a single word.” It is wise to remind a novice of their safeword I find in case, in the excitement of the new, they forget.  My right hand moved slowly inside her coat, which was of a dark material and almost as long as mine. My fingers slipped between the buttons of her shirt to rest lightly on a shear and half cup bra. Her flesh was very warm as I pushed my index finger under the top of the material and rolled her nipple under it then, drawing back my nail, I scraped over the small budding flesh. Another sweet sigh came to my ears.  I thought one more experience, before going up stairs, so my hand left her breast and moved slowly up to her throat and then, with a strong push, I sent her to thud against the wall and tightened my grip.  In the darkness I saw her eyes open wide as she saw my hooded face for the first time, “Sensations,” I said, “it can be all about sensations.”  “Upstairs, time to show you what the book could not.”  I released her and let her lead the way upstairs and into my playroom, the light was on dimmer so added a little dungeony atmosphere. I touched her shoulder to stop her then walked further into the room and sat on a chair facing her.  “Take off your coat.” I said.  I suppose it might be entertaining, and pleasing, to give a short deion of the girl at this point.  As I mentioned she fell perfectly into what I consider appealing, 5ft 7inchs tall, give or take an inch, a size 8 (I know such things as I sell corsets too) with breasts that fit nicely into my hand. Her hair, this evening, was shoulder length, straight and black with, something like burgundy hints. Her face was perfect, as only teenager’s skin can be, without wrinkles or lines and wearing black eyeliner and dark red lipstick.  As she took off her coat, which was a deep purple, I saw she was wearing a red shirt with full sleeves, a soft cotton skirt of a darker red that came to mid thigh, black fishnets and black, ankle boots, maybe, the same as on the first occasion I saw her.  “Hold-up’s or stockings? I asked, “show, don’t tell”  “You really don’t like small talk.” She said and lifted the hem of her skirt to show the lacy elasticated top of hold-ups.  “In case you do not know what these things are,” I waved my left hand to indicate my play furniture, “That is a St. Andrew’s Cross, a simple why to hold you safely, and securely, when being flogged; many like it this way, Dom and sub.  That is a spanking bench, you can lean against it or kneel on the lower cushion, also a nice height to fuck on. I have a pony, which is easier to show you it use than explain; maybe if you visit again I will let you ride it. And on the wall behind you there are many securing points if the cross is not wanted.”  “Come and kneel between my legs.” I said unzipping my coat and opening my knees.  She did not move and looked a little uneasy, “Be a good girl and come here so I can put some cuffs on your wrists. Now she came forward and knelt down, sitting on her heels and placed her right hand on my thigh.  “A little show of defiance?” I asked and not waiting for an answer I put on a leather restraint.  “These were the first things I ever made when I came to the Life.” She watched me intently with a small smile as I fastened the strap then, when it was done, she gave me her left hand for the other restraint.  “Close your eyes.” I said and once they were shut I said, “Open your legs and put your hands behind your back.” Her skirt rose up and I could see pale skin above the fishnets as she obeyed. I reached down and gently pulled my nails along her inner thigh and then sat back to look at her.  “In a few moments I will use some of my toys on you, I will begin with a soft toy and use it gently but then I will change it and use another type of toy and change again and each change will mean more sensation until it brings pain and maybe ecstasy”  I picked up a blindfold and told her to open her eyes and come closer. Once it covered her pretty blue eyes I told her to give me her hand and to stand up.  “Take off your skirt and give it to me.” She pulled down the zip at her hip and climbed out of the skirt. She wore a thin red g-string which was mostly lace and very seethough.  “Give me your right hand.” She did and I placed it on my left shoulder, “Now give me your right foot so I can add an ankle cuff. “Now your left.” Once the other restraint was on I ran my hand along the underside of her leg, over her hold-ups, across skin and gently touched the g-string with my finger tips.  I lifted her foot off my knee and, standing up, led her back to my flogging wall.  “As this is your first time I will let you keep your arms down by your side, I will still tie them as don’t want you covering yourself, but it is a little more comfortable this way. First though I need to do this.” I unbuttoned her shirt and took it off her compliant body. Her bra matched her g-string, cut low letting half a nipple show above both cups. I lifted out her left breast and sucked hard on her nipple pinching it between thumb and forefinger as I let it fall from my mouth, forcing a gasp of pain, or pleasure, from her lips.  I tied red rope to her left wrist restraint securing her hand about 6 inched from her side then did the same with her right wrist, then, before continuing and because she could no longer see me, I removed my hood and coat. I knelt in front of her and kissed her navel before tying a rope to her left ankle restraint and then her right, forcing her legs almost three feet apart  I sat back on my boot heels and looked at her, chest rising and falling quickly as she breathed in short, shallow breaths, one nipple, very pink, hard rested over the top of red material and moving down to more red material, wet and slick as her body, and mind, responded to stimuli physical and mental.  “This is a suede flogger.” I said beginning to gentle swing it in a figure of eight so that its movement caused a breeze that caressed her skin; goosebumps appeared over her arms.  I took half a step closer and the 18 tails brushed against flesh creating delicate slapping sounds. Downwards over left breast then right breast, from shoulder to nipple then, with a slight change of action, from hip to navel, left then right with not too much force, letting the suede tails move across skin once or twice a second.  I took another half step increasing the speed of my swing and the impact now made a very nice sharp sound. An added bonus, for me anyway, was that her hidden nipple had been forced out by the flogging action and the tails hit each pink morsel on each pass of the flogger.  Her skin was turning pink so I stopped and, discarding my flogger, ran my hands over her gently, creating marks with my nails and feeling the warmth I had created.  I have a very sharp dagger, broad of blade and 12 inches long in my playroom, I unsheathed it and laid the cold blade on her left breast, a nice intake of breath was my reward. I moved the edge across her breasts and under the right strap of her bra. A quick upwards pull and the strap split in two, a reverse journey, with a little more pressure this time, ended in another strap cut through. I reached behind her to unclipped the strap and her head came forward to rest against my neck and I felt a gentle kiss alight there. The clip opened (yes I can do this one handed) and felt the bra fall to the floor.  “More.” Was the single word she breathed against my neck.  “Obviously, little one.” My reply.  3 fingers of my right hand moved up quickly to slap the red material of her g-string, ‘very wet indeed’ I thought as I stepped back and reached for my red and black 36tail flogger.  Now, as the multi tails hit, her muscles twitched and small panted sighs came from her lips. Heavy, thudding hits moved a breast with each contact and made a wonderful sound as they hit her flat stomach, only a couple minutes of this and her skin was red and she was dancing on her toes with each hit  I stopped and dropped the flogger into my play bag and stood still simply looking at her, I had a strong, and strange, urge to untie her and carry her to my bedroom and gently make love to her for she looked so innocent and young tied against my wall. I had an overwhelming desire to ‘comfort, no wrong word, worship her was much closer to the mark.  Her head tilted to the left, as though listening for me, and then said, “Demon: Sir? Is everything alright?”  A slow smile returned to my lips and, stepping forward, slapped down hard on her left breast stinging the fingers of my hand. She cried out in pain and, no doubt, shock and her blind eyes looked down to her hurting flesh as her hand tried to reach up to ease the sensation  "All is just as it should be.” I said, “One more toy and then you can turn around for a time.”  I have two toys I call ‘little and big sister’, little sis is a whip flogger with a jointed tail section joining 8 shortish leather tails to the main body of the whip, very flicky and stingy; perfect for nipples and caressing g-strings with touches of fire.  Following the heavy beat from the music, heard and felt from downstairs, I flicked the tails at her legs, aiming just above her knees and, with a strong wrist action, moved the tails slowly upwards, hitting one leg then the other. I was tempted to aim at that small piece of red material but did not want to risk her stopping the play. I, therefore, moved outwards as I got higher and then continued moving towards her navel and up over her breasts. I was rewarded with many twitches, sighs and seeing her hands clenching and unclenching.  I pushed this play as much as I dared, as I love the way this toy touches nipples with fiery kisses, so I watching her face and body intently, looking for the moment when her strength, courage, tolerance or, god forbid, boredom got the better of her.  She was shaking her head from side to side, facing the heavens her mouth open sucking in air as though drowning, so I slowed my swings and eased off the pressure until finally I stopped.  Throwing the toy in to my bag I put my arms around her and pulled her to me, after a moment I raked my nails down her back – sensation upon sensation without time to recover or relax into a lessened state of awareness  “If you do not want this just says no, other things can still continue.” I said and slipped 2 fingers under her g-string and into her wet, warm cunt.  She almost screamed as she thrust her hips forward on to my hand so, smiling (being a sadist makes me smile a great deal), I thrust my fingers into her letting my palm thud into her clit.  I am a Dom, a sadist and I love to inflict pain but I do not like receiving it, so I had an entertaining decision to make for, as my fingers continued to make her body shake and quiver, her mouth found my shoulder and her teeth found my flesh and she bit me as the orgasm, I knew was coming, racked her body.  I added a finger and speed and as her groaning breaths moved against my skin I almost forgot my tortured flesh until she cried out, releasing her hold on me. As her body danced in uncontrolled spasms while waves of orgasm rippled through her the pain in my shoulder doubled up giving me an incentive to reinforce the speed and strength of my fingers lifting her onto her very toes.  “Oh god, stop please stop, for fuck sake stop, god oh god oh god.” Such sweet words tripped continually from her gasping mouth, and like the good Dom I am, I continued, She had arched her back, a beautiful human sculpture curving from toe tip to crown of head resting on the wall with nipples pointing to the sky,  I bent down and bit into her left nipple, teeth clamping hard, head pulling back and lips clamped to allow me to suck hard and long.  I felt a sudden explosion of hot wetness on my hand and she screamed in one long wild cry, second after second her scream continued  as my fingers and teeth did their work, “Demon, Lord, Sir, please, please stop.” she begged as the scream finally died  I stopped my fingers movement but left them buried inside her, releasing her nipple I supported her weight with my left arm as she straightened up to rest against the wall behind her. My fingers rolled over each other in the warmth of her cunt as I slowly withdrew them.  “Open your mouth”, I said, “You have made a mess on my hand.” This she did and as I placed my fingers close to her lips her tongue came out and eagerly licked them clean of her unexpected reaction. “Good girl.” I said as I watched her clean my hand.  “A slight rest, little one, then we will continue with more toys if you still wish it.” I watched her face hoping she would not want to stop. She said nothing as her breathing slowed. I asked, “Would you like some cold water?” With a slight nod of her head I said, “Stay still while I am gone, it will be only seconds but continue to rest against the wall your legs may not want to obey you if asked to do more than stand still.”  On impulse I gentle kissed her lips, tasting her cunt on them, before leaving to run cold water into a glass, returning I let her sip for a few moments until the glass was almost empty.  I placed my right hand, cold from holding the glass, against her cheek and let it travel over her skin to her shoulder then down her arm to reach the restraint. As I untied the rope I said, “I am not trying to break you, little one, I am not trying to release your hidden goddess or any other such sad drivel, I seek only to let you know yourself, your limits, your desires and allow you the freedom to enjoy and act on them.”  With the last rope untied and kneeling in front of her – I am worshipping again I thought to myself - I ran my hands up her legs and under the thin straps of her g-string and then slowly pulled them down her legs until she obediently lifted her right foot, then her left, to allow me to remove them.  I thought for a second or two, artistic considerations my only concern (sometimes my mind takes little detours) and then, making a decision, I removed her boots, ankle restraints then hold ups making sure my hands travelled slowly down her legs as I did so.  Naked, the first time is always so uniquely special, it is a shame how familiarity can diminish the beautiful sometimes - much too deep – maybe tis the fault of Metallica’s ‘Nothing Else Matters’ which is now playing.  No tattoos, no body piercings, (maybe I can add a piece of jewellery so she will never forget me) a tiny scar above her right knee, cunt, now swollen and pink, clean shaven, her skin red with a few subtle marks remaining from the flogging. Worshipping indeed, it is a good thing she wears a blindfold.  I stand and, taking her hand, pull her away from the wall, “Time to turn around,” I say, “Wait”  I leaned a 10 foot piece of wood, 10 inches wide by 2inches thick, against the flogging wall where she had been standing and then placed her hand on it, “Lean on this, it will hold your weight do not worry. It is best if you rest your head on your hands as this get your arms away from the flogger’s tails”  I caressed her back with my nails, leaving swirlling marks in her skin, “I have 2 toys like the ones you have felt, then others that are more severe, twin tailed straps in leather and rubber and then whips and for your arse I have paddles and a horse crop. You may be surprised how much you will like your back being flogged but I would hate for your front to feel left out”  Resting my weight against the full length of her body, crushing her against the hard wood, I reached around to attach a butterfly clamp to her right nipple and she cried out a little, which was pleasing, as it bit. I attached the other to her left nipple and said, “There is a chain between them, do not pull away from the wood or you will not enjoy the result.”  ‘Big Sister’ is a flogger with 12 plaited, leather tails about 36inch in total length, I stood behind her and, again using the typical figure 8 action, began to touch her skin, very gently to start and at a slow speed too.  Building up speed and strength over a couple of minutes she began to make sweet music of sighs and little cries, the tails hit with delicious sharp sounds of their own as I began to punctuate the pattern of swings by sending much stronger whip like flicks at her arse, which, soon made her tense her muscles in anticipation of the next strike.I laid this toy down and picked up my purple and black Cougar (a longer 12 tail leather cat with 4in leather thongs at each tail end). I began again using this new toy in the same place and in the same pattern but then moved to my left, continuing to hit as I moved.  Once I stood level with her shoulder and about a stride from her I changed the way I used the Cougar. I now brought it down in single strokes, striking from shoulder blade to shoulder blade and moving down her back to her arse using much more strength especially when connecting, horizontally, on her reddening arse cheeks.  I could see her face as I stuck, and with each hit her teeth bit into her bottom lip. I said, continuing to hit, “Your choice, 12 hard strokes to upper back or arse?” she did not reply for a couple of seconds so I added, “And then I will take the clamps of your nipples.”  “Bum” she replied so I hit her hard on her shoulders and said “Bum, what”  “Bum, Sir” she said quickly after a gasp  “I was expecting a ‘please’, but Sir will do.” And then added, “count them as I hit in case I forgot how many and have to start again.”  She did as was told and by the time she got to 12 her voice was shaking as the strikes had gotten harder, “Good girl,“ I said and throwing the Cougar onto my bag I rubbed her back running hands over slight welts in her skin. Standing behind her I kneeded her arse for half a minute to ease the sting and then moved to kneel by her head.  “A new sensation now, what fun this will be.” I could see her face react as she tried to work out what I meant, “Your sweet, poor, tortured nipple hurt when the clamp went on but now is almost bearable. But when I take it off, new blood with rush back in, nerves will awaken and you will have an experience to file away and fear for the next time. Rubbing it will greatly ease the pain but do not rub it until I say you can.”  I held the clamp and because I am a sadist I twisted it first with a gentle tug, she squealed loudly, “Sorry little one, I just wanted to make sure you remember my words.” I pushed and the clamp opens, her nipple sticking to it for a second before coming free.  Her mouth opened and she sucked air in in gasps as the pain returned to her pink flesh, it was still flattened from the clamp’s pressure and I waited for a count of 5 then said, “You may rub it now.”  Quickly her right hand reached under her and he caressed her breast and nipple, a most rewarding sight. I let this go on for a short time still holding the removed clamp.  “Now then, time to repeat this joy. You get a choice.” I released my hold on the removed clamp and it swung down freely to tug gently on her other nipple, another squeal; being a sadist is fun indeed.  “You can give me a reward, for all my kind attention, and rub your nipple straight away or you must count 60 seconds before I let you rub after it comes off.”  In a most sweet and quiet voice she asked, “What reward, Sir?”  I stood and stepped slightly forward so my leather trousers just touched her upper arm.  ”You can open your mouth.”  “I don’t think I can count to 60, Sir, so the reward is wiser.” I noticed she was smiling and as I pulled down my zip I said, “I must be doing something wrong if you are still smiling. Open.”  I slipped my prick into her hot mouth and, leaning over her, put my left hand between her shoulder blades ready to release the remaining clamp. I closed my eyes as her head began to move and I felt her suck and bite on my, most entertained, cock. “Let me know when you want the clamp off and I will quickly remove it for you to ease the pain”.  Her left hand had found its way between my legs and was holding my left thigh, gently pulling me towards her in time with her head movements. Her right hand she lifted and laid, palm up, on her back, I thought, so I had easy access to the remaining clamp.  After a very pleasing minute or two she took her mouth off me and said ‘now’ and returned to my ‘reward’. Reaching over I pressed in the clamp and pulled it off dropping them to the floor. I heard, and felt on my prick, her squeal as she sucked harder on me taking my prick to the back of her throat, her left hand pulling me in and holding me there though her right hand did not leave her back.  Her squeal became a mauling sound as her body began to shiver and only after about 30 seconds did her right hand finally move and I saw her massaging her right breast. I may be a Dom and a sadist but this sight, with this ‘attention, was too much (I am a male after all) so I pulled myself from her mouth and looked at the ceiling for a few seconds. This only just did its purpose as once my prick was out of her mouth the sounds she then made, as her orgasm came and diminished, could have deflowered a priest.  Fighting an almost overpowering desire to put my prick back in to her, anywhere in her, I finally put it back in my trousers and pulled up my zip – will power, such a pain in the arse at times.  I went to my bag and found my leg spreader, a 10mm bar of mild steel I had fashioned a few years before in the heat of a furnace - not unlike the forging of a new submissive I thought to myself. I found myself kneeling at her feet again as I replaced her ankle restraints and then secured these to the spreader bar, forcing her legs 30 inches apart. I made the mistake of looking up, and the sight of her open and inviting cunt almost made me change my mind about where I had put my prick.  There is a metal securing bolt at the top of the plank of wood so moving to stand by her head I took her hands and tied them to it so she was stretched along the wood’s length.  “The toys from now on will be much more intense?” I said. “I will use each for a minute or so but with each change they will get a little harsher. You already have pretty marks on your skin but these toys will leave better ones that will last for a few days, shall I begin?”  “Yes, My Demon.” she whispered and I saw her grip the ropes that tied her hands.  I take a red and black leather flog with twin, 8 inch, tails and began it strike her back, moving around her, watching her muscles twitch as the stinging leather hit, from neck to arse, leaving growing welts on her skin.  I hit with a constant strength as I moved from her left side to her right and back again until I was back at my starting position where I took a step closer to her and, reaching, sent the tails around her ribs to contact with her softly hanging breast. Her back arched and she screamed in a short feral explosion.  I dropped the flogger and, as she clenched her teeth, grabbed the hurt breast and squeezed it in my fist, “If you are expecting one thing the unexpected is so much better.” I said changing my hold on her flesh and rolling the nipple between thumb and finger.  I saw a tear appear under her blindfold so asked, “Do I continue, you remember the word to end this?”  I could see her think and then she said, “I remember but I don’t know, I think, I think I want to say stop.”  “ok, I will continue with a different sensation, use the word when you know you are sure about ending things.”  I untied her hands, along with one end of the spreader bar then said, helping her stand up, “I just need you to turn around and lay back on the wood.”  She was a little shaky as she stood so putting my arm around her I held her tight. As I did this her head lifted up so I kissed her and was pleasantly surprised as her tongue forced its way into my mouth. The kiss continued and my hand found its way between her legs and a single finger entered her gently slipping in and out as she lifted her left leg to give me easier excess.  “Enough.” I said removing my finger and mouth from her body, I helped her back onto the sloping wood and again tied her hands high above her head, to the securing bolt, I then secured the spreader bar between the ankle restraints under the wood. The bar has a loop at midpoint and to this I tied a length of rope, the other end I tied to the flogging wall, pulling her feet back under her arse and lifting her cunt high as her hips where pulled wide due to the width of the plank.  I sat on the chair I had used earlier and took off my boots and then trousers. I found a condom and with a little concentration, put it on then selected a horse crop, which had two short leather tails about 2 inches long, and moved to stand at the foot of the wood plank.  With small, sharp movements of my wrist I sent the tails across her nipples, first one then the other, hitting 10 or 12 times in a staccato rhythm then changing the target to hit once between her legs, on soft pink lips which stood, unexpectantly, open. I repeated this 3 or 4 times until I judged I had risked enough and she had had enough.  I moved to stand by her side and, while I stroked her body from nipple to inner thigh, I whispered in her ear, “Some do not think fucking is part of BDSM so I shall ask if you wished to be fucked before I do it as part of this experience.”  “Yes, Sir,” She said with a small smile. “or, Yes Please if you prefer.”  I untied her hands and she let her arms hang down at her side as I lifted my right leg over the plank so my prick was an inch or two from her and said, “Do not be cheeky, little one, you are still tied and just because I will be fucking you does not mean it will be the only sensation you will have  I inched forward and, pushing down on the end of my prick I slowly move inside her and like a good girl she pushed herself deeper onto me. I stood still, prick buried in warmth, and using the crop’s leather tails drew sensual trails across her skin from nipple to nipple to navel to clit and back again. Within a minute she raised her hands and held them again my hips as she began to move on my prick, drawing herself off and then pushing down to rub her clit against my groin as I stood immobile, her breathing began to get faster and, as her nails began to dig in, I saw the growing need she had for me to move inside her. Realising the moment had arrived I rested the crop across her belly and, putting a hand on each of her breasts, leaned down to kiss her ear.  My full weight was pressing down on her, crushing nipples against ribs through the flesh of her breasts. I thrust into her, my movement, adding more pressure and pain, caused her to groan loudly, “I will fuck you for as long as you stand the pain.” I whispered and, pushing myself up on to straight arms, continued to fuck her going as deep and fast as her mirrowing movements allowed.  My breathing was becoming fast as she placed her hands over mine and I saw her dig her nails deep into the soft flesh of her breasts between my fingers, ‘that is unexpected’ I thought to myself and took my left hand away to see what she would do.  Her hands squeezed and twisted her flesh, raking her nails across her erect nipple leaving lines as red as those I had given from my flogging.  “Harder.” A single word, she said, between gasping breathes as she reached for my left hand.  Making my hands into fists I pressed my knuckles into her breasts as her hands returned to my hips.  I fucked and forced my weight onto her as a building pain built in my hips under her hands, looking down I saw a bright red drop of blood on my skin, red lines, from this dear girl’s nails, mirroring her own marks; a small price to pay  I did not think I would be able to make her cum, or decide to stop this pain, before I came but suddenly her head thrashed from side to side and the raking of my skin stopped. She made no sound, did not breathe as her fingers spread wide and muscles moved in slow waves under the tight skin of her stomach.  I came a second later and, fighting the mix of pain and pleasure in the tip of my prick, continued to thrust into her until her movements calmed down.  A second’s pause, heart pounding, breathing trying to fill my lungs, vision clearing from an unnoticed unfocused gaze, I stand and let my prick die a little inside her.  I grasped the wood plank on either side of her neck and, leaning down, kiss her lightly on the lips. I gently removed the blindfold and threw it onto the floor.  Her eyes remain closed as I pushed myself up to stand looking down at her – fuck she was beautiful.  Her eyes opened slightly, they shine, a small smile comes to her lips and letting her arms fall to her side she closes her eyes again as the smile grows bigger.  Sadly, oh so very sadly, I pull myself out of her and stepping over the wooden plank sit down on the chair because my legs are shaking in a most entertaining fashion.  We stayed like that for about 5 minutes, her smiles, fading then bursting out bigger than before as the minutes pass.  I pulled on my trousers, discarding the condom into a bin, but remained barefooted as I moved to her shackled feet. I knelt down - I seemed to always be on my knees in front of her – and unbuckled the nearest restraint. Reaching under the plank I finally managed to unbuckle the other and, as if by magic, found myself within reach of her glistening cunt.  Like the nice Dom I am I lowered my head and, after one long, slow lick, bit gently into her soft pick lips, she tasted sweet, naturally and with a hint of strawberry from my used condom.  After a few seconds I stood going to her side to help her stand but as I got close she reached out and put the fingers of her left hand in to my unzipped trousers. I stopped and she pulled out my prick and, with a gentle tug, she led me back to her mouth, slow and gentle this time she held me with soft licks and sucks.  With eyes closed, her right hand moved slowly to go between her legs, with slow strokes, she put two fingers inside her.  I am old, but luckily not that old, for as I watched and felt her actions my prick came back to life. I took in what she was doing and let myself react as my body wished with no attempt at self control.  With a full prick in her mouth her fingers moved faster and, again, erotic moans began to come from her mouth vibrating on my shaft.  “I am going to cum.” I said giving her time to withdraw her mouth, if she wished, but she sucked as before and her fingers gained speed and strength adding wet sounds to my already stimulated senses.  I had to grab, with equal strength and need, the plank for balance and her hair to pull her on to me as I came in four strong spasms. She sucked, swallowed and bit as I came and I could not stop a cry cascade from my lips which went, something like, ”fffuuucckkkking jeeeeeeesus fucking Christ” as I tried to pierce the back of her skull with my softening prick.  As I died again, this time in her mouth, she gently sucked and licked until after a minute or so she took her mouth away, looked up at me and said with a smile, “Hello, Demon, my name’s Amy.”  The End - i think?
Theres a huge huge difference between people who do things for you because they have to, through obligation manipulation coercion threats or whateverVersus people who do things for you simply because they adore you and want you to be happyThe 1st set are worthless to MeThe 2nd ... Priceless Not saying I don't enjoy enticing puppeting manipulating coercing even mindfkg .. bc I absolutely do!!  In fact I used to find subliminal manipulation and blatant MindFucks particularly entertaining..  allatime everywhere lol weg But only for Funsies with wellbonded friends at the Trust level of ConsensualNonconsent .. which I had with so many onceupon.  Good times!! But so many relocated .. and too many passed, sobs .. venues closed, everythings Different, the World has Changed ..as it always does, and as must I, again. Ik Ik. "The best way to predict ones future is to create it."    Shame Quality Muses seem superscarce this decade. ah well. Def past time to explore new Hunting Grounds irl .. nilla and alt .. hmm believe theres an alt party 12 16 somewhere .. 
Reflection: Week 1 Well I would say that the first week has gone pretty well. I have worn my collar daily. I have used a plug all but one day. I will find some additional attire for around the house that will be acceptable. I have shared all of the messages with him that I have received since the beginning of the new year. It may be a small step but I feel like these things help maintain a good headspace for us bith and encourages intimacy on various levels. I will try to keep an ongoung update as time permits. Through reflection comes the opportunity for growth.
Please come with something of substance if you message me. Something more than just "hi",  A man recently told me that I have the ability to say "no" to anyone I choose to, even a Dom. Because even though a sub I still deserve respect and always have a choice.  please be respectful when you message me or I will not answer.  I am looking for something of substance, I want the mental connection before the physical one, I want the intense, can't live without you connection.  happy searching 
well i am booked to fly out thursday to Cologne, Germany. For the Fetish celebration. on the October 20th to the October 22nd I'm staying there till the October 24th. Hopefully looking forward to collaboration with some of the other content creators that'll be there in the other kinksters. I'm leaving a few days short of my birthday on the 26th of October. I'll be looking to create some great content For my instagram, twitter, Tik Tok social media and my fansly site. After the event as well as on the 23rd creating some more live streams and content visiting a few fetish store and kink clubs and the 24th before flying back to the states. as the rubber cat girl and rubber doll I am.  
We are a married couple that only serves together. We are most interested in finding a Dominant Bull who has bdsm experience. Finding a bull has never been difficult for us, but finding one with a genuine and serious interest in D/s has not been as easy. Neither of us are into severe pain or extreme fetishes like scat, blood, and the like. We are, however, both serious bondage lovers and have experience with many forms of restraint - gags, hoods, hogties, rope bondage, and leather and steel restraints. We have not tried latex/rubber, but are open to it. We both enjoy submitting sexually to an Alpha Male. Both Pan and Hetero Dominants are welcome. Sexual interaction with hubby is not a requirement, but he does require humiliation, i.e., chastity, forced to watch as I am used, creampie clean-up, and oral service of the Dominant at their discretion. We are real, experienced, and looking forward to finding the Right One for us.
So this is a recurring fantasy I have, I hope some of you enjoy it :) Miss wants me to be a slut, she asks me all the time, “what are you”, “a slut” I have to reply, then she punishes me for being such a submissive slut. Then she organises for me to go and serve others. I have no choice, and I have no idea who it is until I go to their place. There I must act as if the commands were coming from Miss, I must do as I am told.  Miss says I am not allowed to cum, if I do I will be punished for it, the people I am sent to know this, but, as they are controlling me, they can make me cum for them. This will result in them being able to watch the punishment from Miss, so they get to decide if they want that to happen to me. When I am finished I have to return to Miss, I kneel naked in front of her, and I have to explain everything I did in great detail, humiliating myself, I have to describe what I did, how I felt, what it smelled like, absolutely all details. Miss then punishes me for being such a slut.   Then at the end she asks if I had cum, now the other people don’t tell her, I have to admit to it myself.
I just read my profile and realised how dry I made myself sound😮. I have a very good,often quick witted sense of humour, sometimes sarcastic, but never derogatory. I love animals, I have cats  I'm generally optimistic, I'm well educated, I do a job I really enjoy even though I work a very weird shift pattern,and so tend to have a lot of free time. Yes,I'm still an old fashioned strict disciplinarian, but I am also a funny, sometimes eccentric, kind, very romantic, human as well. Just felt I should add that , try to do myself justice. Any other questions you have, ask away.,I don't bite,well unless you would like me too 🤣  
Im getting super interested with having a gangbang i wanna be sensible and start out small maybe with like 4 or 5 guys does anyone have any experience with this ? I wouldnt mind having another girl there to help out perhaps as a fluffer as id wanna be center of attention but im not sure how to arrange that. Anyone interested in helping me arrange this or just giving me some advice is more than welcome to message me. My mouth and ass would be up for the taking i will be keeping my pussy just for my master. Thanks for reading guys and gals. :)  
  To a Man-Bride, do not be fooled by the title there is a special relationship that develops between two men that can only be consummated through phallic worship. One side holds the phallus and the other the vessel where that phallus is to dwell in glory. One is the earth and the other is the plow that opens  it and makes it fertile. Not in the sense of conception but in ideas, attitudes, confidence, and fulfillment.  I've always despised the words sub, and passive because the imply a degree of unworthiness. The one who allows phallus to enter him IS a full and total man; because it takes a man to allow another to enter him and hold him inside and effectively owning that part of the body that makes them equals, the phallus. The glory of a male phallus is the ring of his vessel around it, pulsating, embracing, and forever inviting him deeper then who is the more complete I ask? The vessel owns two phalluses and  because of that becomes twice the man. The experience of he who is entered is dual; on one hand he feel a phallus invading his intimacy but also can and touched outside because he has another phallus outside of his body to experience, savor and reach  fulfillment. Therefore, like a precious object he holds both seeds, his and his partner and becomes fertile by being able to put that experience to good use and walk tall, he has become a man's man. The one who entered him is the channel through which this is achieved and it is not a minor task to bring a fellow man out of his own shadow and into his own light. Nor a master, nor a top, not a controller, but an enablerer.  The role of the phallic union is to elevate both men to achieve their best potential and expand their world. Every time they will unite it will be a process of beautification and the union between those two levels of energies can only be expressed as a bride be cause ones opens willingly and a groom because he enters by his own volition. The phallus is the channel of fulfillment and will work both ways as a heterosexual and as a homosexual (in the ancient ancient aception of the word) process of fulfillment phallus illuminates, guides, centers, and diraspects, that is our destiny.  
I started undergrad in 1973, a medium- sized state university, i was footing the bill & money was tight so I went to student services to see their listings for jobs. There were the usual, dining hall jobs, a few being ushers & security at some sporting events, a couple for maintanance & groundskeeping, then I saw one for art department figure model & it paid $15 an hour, unheard of in the early 1970's, I put my name & number on the list & crossed my fingers. A couple of days later there was a notice in my dorm room mailbox to call the art department offices & ask for Ms. So & So. I decided to prove I was real go-getter & drop by the office. Met with the lady, a graduate assistant, & she told me what the job entailed, Tuesday & Thursday evenings, 7-9:30 PM, nude figure drawing mostly, there may be some painting, there could be private sessions for more advanced work but that was to be negotiated with the individual, the school wasn't paying. She offered me the job, said they were hiring one male, one female but we'd never be doing the same class at the same time. I jumped at the chance as I had a strong CMNM interest at the time. More to come, watch this space.
My background:  Lots of being a volunteer counselor in various fields....drug and alcohol, child abuse and neglect, rape and incest, transgender issues and discrimination plus have been professional buyer for business , doctors and professional women....helped to dress them from skin out....Regular jobs included Thrift store management, orderly, professional driver, service writer, men's suit salesman, day laborer, retailer, detailed trucks and cars, detailing manager, lot attendant, and medically retired at 48 years old, now I am 71...
In a galaxy far, far away, Where aliens come out to play, They landed on our planet green, The funniest beings ever seen!   Their heads were shaped like flying saucers, With eyes as big as water courses, Their skin, a shade of vibrant blue, Looking like they just stepped out of a zoo!   They had antennas on their heads, Glowing neon in bright shades of red, Their language was a mix of beeps and whirs, Making us laugh, and our ears go berserk!   They danced in a style quite bizarre, Wiggling their bodies in an alien spa, Their moves were funky and oh so wild, Doing the moonwalk with an extra-terrestrial style!   They tried to imitate our human ways, Wearing clothes in mismatched craze, But their fashion sense was out of this world, With belts made of cheese, and hats, unfurled!   Oh, those aliens, they were quite a sight, Bringing laughter and joy, day and night, They taught us to embrace the strange, And how to giggle, even in the grimmest of days.   So remember, when you think of space, And those quirky creatures you may chase, Aliens are friends, just a little bizarre, Our cosmic pals, from a distant star!
I like cleaning. It's not my favorite thing to do, but I appreciate a job well done and things looking neat. What I do not like is anything with floors. But I have a dog, we've discussed miss marshmallow girl, and so I spend a lot of time vacuuming. Today was no exception. Add to it, I am so proud of this, washed the kitchen floor on my hands and knees. Hands and knees, y'all! Not a Swiffer, not a mop. Those floors are shiny and perfect. Did I just walk through my kitchen and admire my handiwork? You know I did. Nothing feels quite as good as accomplishment. 
My son was scammed over a two year period culminating in what was supposed to be a first meeting yesterday. He sent money: plane fare, half the AirBNB, etc. and he still harbors some hope tht she might be real and just got cold feet.  I know people think there are a lot of scammers on this site. I'm sure it's true, but it's sad.  I may not want to meet you, or even talk to you, but I am a real, living, breathing woman, just looking for connection like everyone else.  Good luck out there, and for godsake, don't give anyone money!
It is nice to finally have this back, I'm in the UK for now and back studying, to save you asking I'm working on my Full UK Amateur Radio licence and  back at University part-time doing Planetary Science from the Autumn. Yes i can hear the question  would you have time for me as your sub? well yes as i plan to be doing a fair bit of my studies at work, Yes you would get plenty of attention! I do find that as i grow older my tastes change except that i am still very much Sapiosexual and very much still growing as a person.
Today I lost one of my fur babies. He was 8 years old. He will be missed. I have 3 others to be with. R.I.P. Bandit!
deebee is now known as Gigi LaBoome online.  she is fully vaccinated from Covid and also fully retired.  she is fully owned slave of Mistress Jewels.  Nov 2021
Starting the New Year Off Right! We had a lovely, laid back New Year's Eve. I was all ready to snuggle in and fall asleep on Master's chest. He had other plans! Just as I got close he sprang his trap. I quickly found his belt looped around my neck. I was completely at his mercy. He would constrict and loosen it as he played with my clit. I quickly became drenched. However, this did not deter him. He continued on increasing my state of arousal as he choked me. This continued for what seemed like forever, but really was more like a half hour. Finally, he pulled me to my knees and sunk his delicious cock all the way into me from behind. Pulling back on the belt still around my neck he forced me into him as he fucked me. Then he changed positions with him on top and he tightened the belt around my throat as he stroked in and out. The choking intesified my own orgasm as we came together. It was a very Happy New Year!
I've got some off time.  But next week it is back to 6 days a week.     I still wonder what it is with folks.  If you want to talk fine.  Im down with that.  I enjoy meeting new people and potentially making friends.  However... don't make promisses you have no intention of keeping.  Again, I can't say this enough, grow up and if the person you are talking to just isnt relationship material, tell them.  Do not just ghost them.  Its cruel.   Yes this is a "fetish" site.  Yes, some get off on cruel acts committed to them. But prolonged mental cruelty will ruin a person.   I miss the good ole days.  When if you had a problem with someone, you just told them and if it could be worked out, you did so. If not you walked away and left it alone.  If you were not interested in someone, you just told them. Not ghost them and leaving them wondering what they did wrong.  You got to know a person, the real person before jumping into commitments.  And a whole lot more.   What is worse, I have seen this behavior more and more from Gen X and later.  What the hell?   Everyone has their fantasies.  Their dreams and desires.  Everyone has their own idea on what and how this lifestyle is and should be.  However, at the end of the day, we are human beings.  Lets start there and start acting like it.  
why do people play these stupid games... I thought I had an interested (local) sub that wanted my ideal D/s relationship... well... he decided he's "...too pretty to be a sub, and wants to go to California to get with a modeling agency..." I didn't tell him that I used to model and stilll have connections... why should I? I thanked him for leading me on and blocked him on all media... Okay that's over... was back at the gym today for the first time in a bit, lot's going on and been sick so BOO!!!!! Did dead lifts for the first time in a long time (maybe 2-3 months?) 235 pound, 5 reps... not bad still not back up to my record but not bad! Left the gym, went to the grocery store (I see enchiladas in my future...) and came home only to find myself bored... I made my drag performer friend a mix, then decided today was a good day to make BBQ Sauce... oooops... 3 kinds... BBQ, Sweet & Spicy, and Hot... my son came by as I was just starting so I had him help... he's jealous that he can't take any home with him... oh well... time to find my next project... maybe I'll go out back and get that firepit started...
So the forums are back up, we'll see how long that lasts.  I deleted my old profile after they disappeared, but when I rejoined today I was able to get my old username.  So I am back, just to see how things are.  Maybe even start writing again.  I wrote in my journal regularly before, even had a few followers.  I was known for my bitchy honesty.  We'll see if I am still that way or if I have settled down some in my older age.
How many of us find the treasure we've sought for so long?  How many of us give up and just accept what is in front of us?  How many of us are truly sincere and willing to kiss a few frogs  while trying to find our kinky slave or the pearl.   Someone suggested I should put up a picture and that My feed would blow up.  That's not what I want.  Let's be real, the one or two or three I want may not be here, it’s like finding a needle in a haystack. Lol I'm sure there is a more up to date analogy.   Yet we persevere hopeful for a meaningful connection.  They are few and far between, but on ocassion we meet someone, strike up a conversation and even a friendship.   Where is the boy you want to beat when frustration is high?  Where is the slave You want to kneel and do whatever You  command? Where is the man you want to rub Your back and have a meaningful conversation with? it's a dichotomy, can you find both in the same individual or do You have a stable of eager boys ready to serve? Time to find what's right for Me!  The search continues.  Goddess
When Peter came to visit us. Peter loooked older in real life than he did in his profile picture. He was extremely well dressed and well spoken. He seemed mild mannered and not the typical Dom my wife normally goes for. After what seemed like hours of chit chat and a few glasses of red wine he finally got on to why he was actually here. That was to inspect Katie my wife and to find out how obiediant we were. The conversation eventually got around to Katies underclothes. He started asking her questions about her bra and knickers. What colour they were, what material they were, where she bought them, how much she pays for them, how often she wears them. The questions were relentless. Then he asks if he could see her in just her bra and panties. He looked at me "You don't mind that do you Ted"? "er No" I replied. "Ok Kate I want you to stand up and strip down to your bra and panties for me" "Good girl" he said as she stood up and started undressing. She looked lovely standing there in just her undies. "Mmm" he muttered "A matching set, just what I like to see" He looks again at me. "Your wife looks very sexy Ted, does it bother you" he asks. "Does what bother me? that she looks sexy" I ask. "No Ted, does it bother you to see your wife take her clothes off so easily for another man"? "haha Oh no" I nervously laugh trying to make light of it, "I'm used to it now" I replied. "Does she make habit of it then Ted" he asks. "Well she is an exhibitionist" I reply. "Ok Ted for this next part I'm going to require you to leave the room " "Oh no, Im comfortable now, I wont be a problem" I assure him. "No Ted as part of your obiediance test I must insist that you leave the room, go and sit in the kitchen and have a beer" he tells me. I want to interview your lovely wife in private, be a good boy and wait in the kitchen until I call you back in and don't worry I am not going to have sex with her, I will instruct her to get fully dressed shortly, I simply want to test her obiediance and limits, yours too Ted so be a good boy and wait in the kitchen until I call you back" "Well if you insist" I mumble as I get up to leave.   Of course I don't go to the kitchen as told. I stand outside the front room door listening to what is being said. I hear him telling her to remove her bra. the silence tell me she is complying. "Thats it my dear, just drop it there" I hear him say. "You have beautiful breasts Katie. stand closer so I can feel them, thats it" I hear him say. He asks her if her nipples are sensitive and by the sound of her shreek I'm guessing he is squeezing her nipples while fondelling her breasts.I can just about hear a few Mmm's and Arrr's and It sounds like he is playing with her tits for some while. "There lovely" I hear him say. "Ok Katie, now the panties, Just lower them down a little. Mmm I love a fully shaved pussy, Wow that is very smooth Kate, Did Ted shave that for you"? I hear him ask.   "Yes he did" I hear her say in a soft shy voice. Did he do that for ny benefit Kate" he knew I was coming to inspect you today.  "Lower your panties a little more for me. Thats hit down to your knees. Part your legs a little more, Mmm thats it. That's lovely. Mmm your so wet Kate. Do you like this"? I hear him ask her.  She replies faintly "Yes Sir I do" He tells her to let her panties drop to her ankles. "Mmm just stand there like that for me" I hear him tell her. "You are so horny" he says. "I must get a couple of pictures" it goes quite and I'm guessing he is getting his phone out and photographing her. I have been standing outside listening and wanking myself. I didn't want to cum as I wanted to fuck her after he had gone but I couldn't help cumming at the thought of what was happening.  I heard him telling her to kneel down and unzip him. She was obviously complying. "Thats it put it in your mouth, Ohhh thats lovely" I can hear him moaning as she sucks him off. After a while I hear him telling her not to swallow. "Hold it in your mouth" he tells her. from his groans it is obvious that he has cum in her mouth."Open your mouth let me see" he tells her. "Good girl" He tells her to gargle before allowing her to swallow. He again tells her shes a good girl and she knows how to suck a cock.  "I bet you've had a lot of practice" he jokes. Just clean me up a little" Mmm thats very good" he tells her. I hear him say "Ok my dear you can get fully dressed now and go tell Ted I said he can come back in" "Thank you Sir" I hear her say in that soft voice of hers.
  A thought    B S and M are the body of BDSM then the D is the breath.  
Anyone else watch the Royal Windsor Horse Show (aka something that happens every year but is somehow this year a star studded jubilee event)? Anyone else wonder how the United Kingdom is somehow, according to the producer, made up of Scotland, Northern Ireland, Wales and that's it? I mean seriously, they couldn't find a few people to jingle some bells while hitting sticks and belting out 'Jerusalem'? I wonder if the Queen is with it enough to realise that she does reign in England too. Yesterday's show wouldn't have given her a clue - we can feature people from Oman and Azerbijan, but not one morris dancer or English singer to be seen. 
Haha. Seems Drumf  is a bad word on this site. Let's see if an edit makes the cut... 11/5/24 If you're a Drumf supporter, let's not waste each other's time. We will never be more than cordial acquaintances, at best. I genuinely cannot ever understand the mindset that accepts his behaviours in any way, shape, or form, let alone as leader and role model for this country and the world. Apparently some people don't understand how politics plays into a site like this. In this case, it goes way beyond politics and into morality. I can be civil, as evidenced by my opening lines here. When what I really feel in my heart is: I have no fucking use for you in my life, you fucking traitors to humanity, compassion, and decency. You call yourselves patriots and wave the US flag, all while supporting a would be dictator. You don't value Democracy, nor any of the millions of immigrants, women, disabled and/or ethnicly diverse individuals, or even children you've stepped on...y'know, people who make this country truly Great. Your red hats are just as UN-patriotic as if they were red coats. At least you got the color right, traitors.
What a productive and enjoyable Sunday was! I woke up early, feeling energized and ready to tackle the day's errands. After having a light breakfast of yogurt and granola, I got started on my to-do list. First on the agenda was laundry. I gathered up all the clothes and linens and separated them by color, ensuring that everything was properly sorted. I then loaded the washing machine, added detergent, and set the appropriate cycle. While waiting for the laundry to finish, I tidied up the living room and the kitchen, making sure everything was neat and organized. Once the laundry was done, I hung the clothes outside to dry in the fresh air and sunshine. There's just something so wonderful about the smell of sun-dried laundry! 🌞 Next, it was time for grocery shopping. I grabbed my reusable shopping bags and headed to the local market. I picked up fresh fruits and vegetables, along with some staples like rice, lentils, and spices. I also treated myself to a beautiful bouquet of flowers to brighten up our home. Upon returning from the market, I spent some time prepping and cooking meals for the week. Today, I made a delicious chickpea curry, a hearty vegetable stir-fry, and a scrumptious quinoa salad. I always feel so accomplished when I have nutritious meals ready to go for the upcoming week. After finishing up in the kitchen, I decided it was time for some much-needed girly time at the salon. I booked an appointment for a manicure, pedicure, and a deep conditioning hair treatment. The salon staff were so friendly, and I had a great time chatting with them while they pampered me. I chose a lovely pastel pink for my nails, perfect for the spring season. 💅🌸

6:00 me: Should I take a nap? It's kinda late. Maybe I should just power through... ... 6:03 me: Okay, a quick nap. The puppy will wake me up. ... ... And she did. At 9:00. So that is why I baked a cake and cleaned the kitchen at midnight.  She woke me barking like mad at the noise outside. She is the nosiest of neighbors. I even bought her an ottoman and set it near the window, though in truth it's also for my benefit so she'll stop ruining the pillows on the chair she has claimed as her lookout spot. Does she use the ottoman? Of course not. It's now after 1. I'm awake. I need to be up in five hours, bribe her to eat, pack, not forget the stuff in the fridge, and get on the road. Chances of me being on time? Place your bets. 
Many folks talk about the importance of watching for red flags when searching for a Domme. In truth there are red flags a Domme must watch out for when interacting with a sub. See some below: -Claims they have no limits -Pressures the Dominant into playing in ways that violate their personal limits. -Shows no care or concern for the dominants wants/needs -Insists on playing with no safe word -Only talking to the Dominant when they are horny -Making threats of doing something drastic if the Dominant leaves or does not talk to them -Calling the dominant names or honorifics without their consent  -Insists on playing with you when they barely know anything about you -Demanding money or gifts. If you think of other red flags to add, please let me know. 
So I suppose I should expand upon what we are seeking so as not to waste anyone's time. I am absolutely not a Dom or even a switch, not really. Not in kink and not in life. But I am looking for a submissive. Who will let me have my way with them like a spoiled child. I want someone so wrapped around my fingers that even though there really aren't any consequences I can give them, and that even though they could over power me or outsmart me they choose not to they choose every second of their submission wholely over and over again. No matter what I am doing to them they choose me as their princess. A submissive daddy type if you will. And daddys arent controlled with fear and pain and neglect but with love and attention and sweet words...and other tantalizing treats.    I feel this is the type of relationship Westley and Buttercup had. Lol.    Ok I am sure I have done a not so stellar job explaining this but hopefully a bit better then before.    Be well everyone.   As always curious friends are always welcome as well.
What part of NO CHEATERS/ YOU MUST BE OPEN WITH ANY PARTNERS YOU HAVE did I not make clear in my profile?   I mean, I thought I made that pretty damn obvious.  I am poly. You can be, too. I don't care if you have a wife and a girlfriend, and then want a sub on top of that, as long as we all know the others exist! It's simple respect, people. HONESTY. If you expect me to form a power exchange relationship with you, I'm going to have to trust you. I can't trust you if your own spouse or partner can't trust you. It's as easy as that.  
Why are there so many scammers on here? Listing their weight at 57 pounds among other obvious falsehoods is a dead giveaway. Why do many state they are willing to relocate but in their profile they put local only? Why can't someone after receiving a very heartfelt reply to their profile simply send a not interested reply back? Not interested,WOW that took 10 seconds. Why do i keep trying? Because finding someone will not save me. i am alone but not lonely and am very greatful for the life i have and if its not meant to be so be it but i have a glass is half full mindset and if it is meant to be it will the the icing on my cake of life. Just saying!
I am not 'woke', I think most Christians aren't, and likewise a lot of BDSM people who believe in a hierarchy system (HOH for example), but nevertheless, I think this should be a safe space. I should be able to express my beliefs, opinions, feelings freely. This is my journal after all, very clearly it is how I feel, and only me, about whatever I feel like talking about. If you disagree, you have your own journal, write in that. And yet I am being inundated with messages from men because they disagree. And generally these messages are spiteful, rude and let's face it, grammatically incorrect. I am being TROLLED, ladies and gentlemen, by people who don't know the difference between their, there and they're. How very disappointing. 
I'm learning and changing all the time.   I grow.   I degrade(sometimes)I have years of journals here.   I have yet to go back and read some older ones.   I may never do that.  Just be aware that I may not be the same person today, that I was then.However I do not plan to remove any journals, ever.  For better or worse it's a history of my journey.  At one point or another they were once valid and true.   And may still be to this day.   But just be aware as you read them, By answers and view today may or may not be the same today as they were when I wrote it many months or years ago.
Just a foot note, I will not comment on the USA Presidents HOME POLICIES, but will say to me he is a Facist in Disguise when it comes to the rest of the world. A Majority of so call conflicts He has allegedly solved is based on rare minerals, and the fact of attaining them at all costs. And as to His contempt of Ukraine and the EU, Hopefully in the not too distant future, the EU will stand up to the USA and say they no longer need them, and to remove all their bases from EU soil. SO IF YOU ARE A SUPPORTER OF TRUMP ADMINISTRATION WE ARE NOT COMPATIBLE.  
So many Doms who contact me here always seem to assume I'm full of all these unfulfilled fantasies about kink and a dom sub dynamic that are  unrealized, offering their cocks, hands, and sometimes even their minds to lead me down the path into my subconscious of dark desires.  Maybe those kind of offers entice other women on this site, ones who have had only dreams of scratching their itches, so to speak, but  hey fellas, if you have read my profile and my journals, you would know I have a great lifetime of experience for us to begin with.  That alone should elevate our initial conversations above the fray.  What I'm seeking here, what I'm seeking from you, is your extra special sauce and inner sanctum of domination, control, sensuality, experiences, etc. that all impact you and bring you to this current wonderful state of being you in all your learned kink glory. So that we may dive together into the depth that our conjoined minds and sexuality and dominance and submission can open before us when we conspire to love and serve and liberate to build a fortress of dynamic.  So please don't ask me to tell you a dark longing I've held my tongue about, because the most sexy longing I'm desiring most is to have you  meld your mind and body and spirit into me so I can become truly yours forever. 
In the tapestry of relationships, polyamory stands out as a distinct weave, one that has graced my life in unexpected ways. Today, I sit back to reflect on my experiences in MfM and fMf dynamics and the deeply transformative impact they have had on me.   Poly relationships, particularly those involving MfM or fMf dynamics, are not merely about the number of partners but the depth of connection, understanding, and mutual respect. I've always felt a special allure towards such relationships. It's an intricate dance of balance, emotion, and trust.   James, my late husband, played an instrumental role in my introduction to this world. He wasn't just my husband; he was a guiding force, teaching me the beauty of unconditional love, free from societal shackles. The way he introduced me to the world of BDSM, and by extension, poly dynamics, was subtle, considerate, and built on a foundation of trust. It wasn't about sharing for sharing's sake, but about expanding our horizons, about understanding that love isn't finite, and that sharing doesn't diminish but rather amplifies affection.   I remember our first experience. The trust between James and me was the anchor, holding us steady amidst the tumultuous waves of uncertainty. He would often whisper affirmations in my ear, reminding me of my worth, my beauty, and my agency. "You are in control," he would say, even when introducing me to a new partner. This wasn't about him, or even about the new partner; it was about *us*, as a unit, exploring, learning, and growing.   In an fMf dynamic, there was a certain softness, a delicate touch. The presence of another woman introduced a different layer of intimacy. It was in these moments that I found a sisterly bond, a deep understanding, which went beyond the realms of physicality. On the other hand, the MfM dynamic provided a sense of security, of being cherished, surrounded by an aura of protection from both sides.   But why do I like it? It's the feeling of expansiveness, the sensation that my heart isn't confined to a singular beat but reverberates with multiple rhythms. James ensured that I never felt ified. It wasn't about mere physicality but an exploration of emotions, boundaries, and profound connections. The journey made me more comfortable in my skin, understanding and accepting my desires, and seeing them not as taboo but as natural extensions of my persona.   James always reminded me of my worth. His unwavering support ensured I never felt "less than" or "used." Each experience was a shared one, a journey that we undertook together. There were moments of doubt, of course, moments where societal conditioning would seep in, whispering words of judgment. But with James by my side, those whispers were quickly silenced. His belief in the beauty and authenticity of our choices bolstered my confidence.   In the end, poly dynamics taught me the multifaceted nature of love. They made me realize that love isn't a zero-sum game. One can love multiple people, in varied ways, without diminishing the love for any single individual. It's about expansion, about realizing the boundless capacity of the human heart.   In these relationships, I've learned more about myself than I ever imagined. They taught me resilience, understanding, and most importantly, self-acceptance. Through the layers of shared experiences, laughter, tears, and deep conversations, I found a version of myself that's unapologetic, bold, and incredibly comfortable in her skin.  
It's a soggy Saturday here in Essex, UK what's everyone up to?  My shopping was done, all domestic was done for me so I am relaxing today after working all week. With a few late nights working too today chilling listening to the rain under a cover works for me. Thinking about the show and tell mix of my edits in chapter 10 of 25.  I haven't written any songs for a while but I will. The art is flowing from me so the next stage to turn them digital will progressed once my edited manuscript goes to readers. Meanwhile I gather hand drawn designs and store them in a box folder.   
Happy New Year 2024 It's been an interesting journey. The last few months have been transformative to say the least. I've lost almost 40 lbs.  My highest weight prior to 2020 was 255. during covid I got down to about 212. Since September of last year, I have gotten down to 175. I've gone from 44" pants to 32" pants and 30" is going to happen. I've also spent a great deal of time working on self awarness and communication more effectlvely. If you are interested "Crucial Conversations" 3rd editon. this make a remarkable difference in not only my ability to communicate more effectively, it's also given me access to being content for everything life is and everything it isnt. Thanks for taking a peek. Respectfully   gadget
Update:  I am still seeking a long term D/s relationship where I serve as the sub and slave partner. I seek a dominant partner who is confident, sane and enjoys (demands) the giving of prolonged oral service and pleasure to any and all parts of the body. I currently reside in the South East but am seeking to relocate, (such as Scotland) whilst I can still mainly work from home. However, I can relocate to a more benficial location if that is preferred by my new partner / owner. I am polite, respetful and eager to please but do not respond well to people who are rude.    
Hey Doms!  Just a short note to say I'm a high energy, extremely intelligent, high libido alpha sub with a lifetime  of experience in BDSM and dynamic relationships. I expect you to be the same! Well, a Dom version, that is!  You think you're hot shit and well, so am I! Won't we be an electric combination?  I can't wait to meet the Dominant I can reverve and respect, one to whom I can give my emotional sexual and mental submission.  Let's make it happen! 
Dark Chocolate can be an exotic flavor  So creamy and smooth, you desire a taste  The aroma is inviting The visual draws you in and puts you on your knees I see you salivating so eager to please  I pull you closer and utter the words breathless and moaning "oh my goodness, stay right there!" You're such a talented pet and you know ho w to please
I’m at a point in life where I’m genuinely ready for love and a long-term relationship built on emotional depth, chemistry, and mutual investment. I’m drawn to men who are grounded, emotionally aware, communicative, and naturally attentive to the person they care about. I give deeply when I choose someone (like the Leo I am). And I’m drawn to people who naturally feel inspired to meet that energy, or even exceed it. I notice when someone shows up with care and initiative. I’m not looking for potential or vague curiosity. I’m looking for someone who actively wants to build something real, evolve together, and hopefully explore power-exchange through a FLR.  I created a questionnaire as a doorway into that exploration. You sharing real experiences matter more than theoretically "correct" answers. If you feel intrigued rather than intimidated you’re probably in the right place ❤️ Submit your answers here: https://forms.gle/6Ui8kVrZasXGZmc8A  /Miss Trevligheter
I get asked about the NC and CA location listings in my profile a lot, so let's address it here. Hopefully some of you will read this.  I live in mid-state North Carolina.  I travel to the SF Bay area of CA many times a year, often staying for weeks at a time. It's where I used to live for over 20 + years and I have family there as well.  So, I list both locations, because I'm not opposed to meeting someone in either location, as long as they are also flexible about it. Actually, I think it's the best of both worlds! 
    The Guest House This being human is a guest house.Every morning a new arrival.   A joy, a depression, a meanness,some momentary awareness comesas an unexpected visitor.   Welcome and entertain them all!Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,who violently sweep your houseempty of its furniture,still, treat each guest honorably.He may be clearing you outfor some new delight.   The dark thought, the shame, the malice,meet them at the door laughing,and invite them in.   Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sent by a guide above. 
Every time i try to update my profile it either gets discarded or just never seems to update, so i am going to try a journal entry. It's hard to believe i could be much more prepared to meet someone for a serious relationship/position, but i continue to work toward it, hoping someone might one day be there for me. In a perfect world, i would find someone that wanted both a genuine relationship and a very regimented M/s life. It would be wonderful to travel and share a life with a Master, living life as His girlfriend, with hormones and 24/7 femme existence. But to also have the M/s dynamic as a backbone of our relationship. Cuddling on the couch, binging a series but all the while wearing a metal collar, chained wrists, chastity, ass plugged. All of the wonderful things of being a spouse but never once having a moment to think that it is "free" of will or choice. Soaking up whatever attention it's owner is willing to give, working every minute for it's opportunity to get a little positive feedback.  
Orgasm control. Yesterday Master was working and so we weren't able to camera-call on Skype - just text. Anyway, I told Him He needed a slut to come round and service Him at work and He began describing what He would do to me, which naturally got me all hot an bothered. So I asked permission to play with myself a little while W/we talked.   He said that if that permission was granted I'd be expected to cum.  Now, I haven't cum for days and I've been enjoying being in the zone of denial, so I asked my Master whether I might turn down the offer because if I was going to cum I wanted Him to be watching me as I did so and to be hearing His voice as I reched the point of no return. It's interesting how quickly Master has worked His way right into the centre of my sex life like this!
It's been quite a while since James (my husband) left me. The house feels emptier, and there's a silence that I can't seem to fill. I miss his laughter, his warmth, the way his eyes sparkled when he smiled at me. I miss the way he held me, the security and comfort I felt in his arms. I miss him, and it hurts. But more than that, I miss the bond we shared, the profound connection we had through our shared love for BDSM. I miss the way he'd look at me, full of trust and love, right before we began a scene. I miss the anticipation, the rush of adrenaline, the sweet surrender. I miss the feeling of his hands against my soft skin. I miss the way he would reassure me, his words soothing and encouraging, as we explored new sensations and experiences together. It's strange to admit, but I miss being his submissive. It's a part of me, a part of who I am. With James, I discovered a part of my identity that I didn't even know existed. He showed me that submission wasn't about weakness or being less than. It was about trust, surrender, and a mutual exchange of power. It was about feeling loved, cherished, and cared for. That's why I've decided to look for a new Dom or perhaps a couple. I need to fill that void in my life, to rediscover the part of me that came alive with James. I want to feel that connection again, to explore and to learn. I want to experience the thrill of a new dynamic, the excitement of setting boundaries and pushing limits. I understand that no one can replace James, and I am not looking for that. I am looking for someone, or someones, who will understand, respect, and cherish me for who I am, a woman who loves and misses the BDSM lifestyle. I am hoping to find individuals who value communication, consent, and safety as much as I do. My feelings are raw, my emotions a whirlwind. But amidst the chaos, there's also a glimmer of hope, a spark of excitement. It's not going to be easy, and I know that. But I also know that I'm strong, resilient, and capable. After all, that's what James taught me. That's what he loved about me.

I am not gonna add anything to my profile unless there is a major update, was down for almost a whole day last time. I have been unindated with messages from older men, I am 27 while I appreciate that some women are into older men I do not have Daddy issues. Please do not expect a reply from me if all I get are rediculous one line messages asking if I suck dick etc. Why are the Women and Trans here so much more respectful and forthcoming? I appreciate that and will be responding to them. I honestly am interested in meeting Women, Couples, and Trans much more then men. Messages without a picture will not be answered.
Oh, George… bless your heart for writing me a whole novel about how you want to “look into a sadistic woman’s eyes” while she perverts you into anal bliss. Truly poetic. But here’s the problem: you’re out here asking for a woman to host you for a month like you’re some kind of kinky exchange student, and all you’re offering is sexual gratification—as if women are sitting around saying, “You know what I need? A strange out-of-towner living in my house for 30 days to eat my food, hog my bathroom, and tell me how multicultural he is in between begging to be pegged.”   You spent time in multinational corporations? Cute. I’m sure your old coworkers will be thrilled to know you’re now out here writing essays about “soft sensual erotic rape play” and “verification photos” like you’re running a BDSM HR department. And let’s be honest—if the highlight of your pitch is “I’m not into pro dommes, but please abuse me sexually,” you might need to realize… sir, you are basically asking for free labor with room and board included.   It’s giving: “Hi, I’m George, I bring nothing but my dick, my mouth, and a suitcase of sci-fi DVDs. Please ruin me, host me, and feed me while I explore my journey.” My love, women are not Airbnbs for your perversion vacations. You wanting someone to host you for a month and offering nothing but orgasms is like me telling Amazon Prime, “I’ll pay for my package with good vibes and a smile.”   So, George, no—no sadistic woman is out here waiting for a floundering consultant to move into her house for a month-long pegging intensive. But I truly hope you find someone on Collarspace who’s willing to take on your… dissertation of desires. Godspeed.
Domme, Mistress, and Goddesses do we have a monthly meeting in the space because the insubordinates, sissies, uninslaved, and footstools are running a muck in my DM's Meeting Agenda 1. Who the hell taught them to just start speaking to us with out asking for permission to speak? You bet the fuck not even think about it. It's an instant ignore. 2. Who is allowing them to start telling us about what they want with their needy asses? Am I a therapist? 3. Whats up with the population of couch surfers asking to live with meSo does this mean they think im a  job? 4. So we don't actually train them. We just pretend to train them, get them edging and then what?  Ill be the secretary
I am not looking for someone that wants to alter their anatomy! I am not looking for a cuckold!  I am very much aware that even submissive men and slaves have desires! If any of the above applies to you, I wish you the best in your search!!
after i wrote my 4 page note on reddit on why for me a lady who has both the dark goddess and the slave and the little girl in one in my observation over the decades and my personal life why while some might last at most a few years here and there i have never seen a successful long term healthy and honest pairing of the daddy dom and little girl..and what the crux is and why even the most highly intelligent and successful people just seem to not crack the code for longevity...and why while most people who are in the scene aren't vanilla aren't regular..and anyone attracted to this is what i code as a thoroghbred horse..what is a bred racing horse? stronger fitter quicker cleaner shinier and a work of art compared to the domestic or regular horse......it still don't work..and the orienting going on that something is missing..it's the wild horse..the wild WOLF that is the next stage of ascension...and that the traditional layout of this isn't working because the traiditonal layout of this is broken...too much power for any decent human to try to wield without misuse, and too much of an internal death and sacrifice without the safety of being held, secure, stable, protected, and hands on intetionally in and out kept....at one point one or both break....and that in the wild the individual the honed in two streams on the same path with no false pretenses absolute soverignty meeting soverngyt coming together and going apart fierce and passionate when together and like soliders on the battlefield navigating life with self first is the next evolution of this..and that the power exchange really is some sort of toxic addictive drug that kills both parties..... i asked this question. n a response to the call i put out to the universe while out and about god/the universe sent me this song while i was out and about and unable to really choose what i listen to. i'm an audio visual media mystic...music primarly. i get my messages, healing, transmissions, downloads, awareness, lessons, main way of orienting this life through sound. secondly through media...and so things will naturally guide me when i'm home and able to control it..but i have a mystical connection to music when out of the home in places where music plays that i can't control what station or song is played next as well. and the song that came up while i was out and about mystically ansewered it for me.   hang on collective, we're in for an amazing but probably bump and deadening past. but there are gems in the mental and emotional death if we choose to hang on.   as usual, they give me new/tweaked songs lyrics.  i will often hear things that the original composers didn't put that fit the situation i'm thinking of, going through, asking about. i i never heard this song before. the original foundation of the chorus in the song is to ask it as a question...but in response to my spell and the question i posed to the universe that the lyrics and song responded to... i guess god is like, gurl there is no question:   mmm mmm mmm in agreement.   "families really bow their heads to pray   daddies really never go away.   oh grandpaaaaaaaaaa. tell me bout the good ol days."   Grandpa (Tell Me 'Bout The Good Old Days) Song by The Judds Overview Videos Lyrics Artists Other recordings Listen Composers Lyrics Grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Sometimes it feels like this world's gone crazy Grandpa, take me back to yesterday When the line between right and wrong Didn't seem so hazy Did lovers really fall in love to stay And stand beside each other, come what may? Was a promise really something people kept Not just something they would say Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away? Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Grandpa, everything is changing fast We call it progress, but I just don't know And grandpa, let's wander back into the past Then paint me the picture of long ago Did lovers really fall in love to stay And stand beside each other, come what may? Was a promise really something people kept Not just something they would say and then forget Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away? Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Mm Mm Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away?   which i mean god can be grandpa in this instance if it, i believe in the tetragrammaton gender neutral energy version, and if that's what it wants to be in this transmission/spell well so be it!
pet store (1/3) you lead me into the pet store quietly, just smiling to yourself when i shiver from the cool air on my already wet pussy. you hold my hand as we walk through the store, but move to stand behind me when we get to the collars and leashes. you place your hands possessively on my hips and pull me back against you, enjoying the view down my top as my breathing speeds up. "it's time, baby," you whisper into my ear. "what kind of collar do you want?" i hadn't thought about helping you choose my collar. i had half expected to wake up one morning to find it around my throat, if i was being honest, and i was overwhelmed by the choices. i shake my head, and you feel the moment my trembling shifts from arousal to panic. you pull me closer and kiss the side of my throat. "you're not choosing," you remind me. "you're helping me, but this is not up to you." your voice is sterner now and i sink into it, letting you steady me. "clear?" "yes sir." you kiss me on the throat again, in a spot i know will soon be covered up by your collar, and i moan softly. "good girl," you murmur before letting me go. i watch you walk up the aisle before moving to the collection of leather collars. i lose track of you while i look through the rows of collars, touching the cool leather, feeling how supple or stiff they are, shaking them to see how much noise they make and how heavy they are. i turn back to you as you walk back down the aisle toward me. you pick up one of the training collars, a metal one with spikes on the inside, and hold it up, jangling it to make sure you have my attention. my breathing speeds up again and you laugh a little when i squeeze my thighs together and reach out to the wall of collars to steady myself, but you put it back on its shelf. "maybe next time," you tell me, and finish walking back to me. you reach out to touch the collar i was looking at with one hand, and the other slips under my skirt, trailing up and down the slickness coating my inner thighs. you trace those wet fingers over my lips and i greedily suck them into my mouth, moaning a little at the taste of us. you start to pull your hand away but i hold onto it, making sure i haven't missed anything and rocking my hips in time to my sucking. you laugh at my whine when you finally remove your fingers from my mouth. "such a desperate little thing you are, babe." you move to stand behind me, trapping me between your body and the wall of collars. "this one?" i don't know how your voice is completely steady, considering you have one hand under my skirt again and i can feel you getting hard. when you first brush against my pussy lips, i look around, making sure we're alone. "eyes ahead," you tell me, your fingers stroking up and down my wet cunt. "tell me why this one." "it's pretty. i like--" i stop, ging when your fingers find my clit. a light pinch from you brings me back. "i like that it looks delicate, light pink with little gold hearts." i'm trying to grind against your fingers now, but you keep them far enough away that i can't get any relief. "and?" i can't help the whine that escapes me when you slip two fingers inside me. i rock against your fingers as i continue. "i like the matching bracelet. i can wear that whenever i can't wear the actual collar. so i'm always collared. always yours." i barely squeeze it out before you're pulling your hand out from under my skirt and i whine louder. you step back and watch me as you bring your fingers to your mouth. i'm still braced against the wall, eyes closed, hips rocking against nothing. there's a trail of pussy juice dripping down my legs and i can't hold back all the little moans and whimpers. "look at you, my pathetic, wanton slut. we haven't even looked at leashes yet."
My dog clogged the toilet.  Okay, technically, I am the one who flushed the wipes, but it was all her. You know those treats that fit into some sort of holder and are meant to occupy the dog for quite some time? She ripped the holder and instead of it taking hours to eat the treat, she ate it in a matter of minutes. Everything seemed fine. And then I woke around 2:30 to her trying to eat a great big pile of mush that had just come out of her butt. Gross. So what do I do? I grab flushable wipes to clean it up. And then I flush them. And then the toilet revolted. Thank the lord I have more than one because I forgot about it until I came back upstairs and it's still unuseable. I looked up how to fix this. There is no magic solution to pour in there and dissolve them. The plunger is most definitely not working. I cannot call a plumber and tell him the dog clogged the toilet. This is just another problem for Tomorrow Me. And probably Middle of the Night Me. And that's not even the end of the story, but that's all I've got left to give tonight.  *Update*  I FIXED IT!!! I seriously thought I was going to have to explain this to a plumber. I just spent a lot of time plunging. And um, then I had to pee. So maybe I had the magic solution because right after I tinkled, flushed, and plunged, it worked. Natural plumber, at your service. 
I am a Cultured creative Sapiosexual Goddess who thrives on stimulating conversation, traveling, hiking, swimming, trail running, working out, kayaking, boating, taking walks on the beach, viewing art, attending comedy events, and soaking up adventurous moments. I live a very active lifestyle without social media, news, alcohol, and mundane things that are designed to shift our focus. I'm the extraordinary experience that your body, mind, soul, and spirit crave! You've found what you've been missing! Are you ready for a different experience?!~~. Or will you cling to what you've been used to and wonder why you keep getting the same results? That's called Insanity! Don't be afraid to try something different. You Will Like It. ~~~Energy is Everything~~~_Be My SubLet's explore Boundaries Of Pleasure~Your credentials, accolades, and worldly materials mean absolutely nothing to me. What does your Energy say? If the vibe is right and you are open to sexually experiencing new things without hangups, we 'might' can embark upon some wonderful adventures together and create memories that last a lifetime. It's sure to be a pleasureful adventure for the both of us.
Just a thought My dear sublook at you. Lying there so patiently, a good boy eager to please. You know what's coming, don't you? You feel the anticipation, the delicious thrill of expectation. My cock awaits, and so does the sting. Yes, there may be a little discomfort, a little tightness at first. But you understand, don't you? This is necessary. This is how you earn my approval, how you make your Mistress C proud.I will be patient, for a while. I'll let your little hole adjust. I'll feel the warmth of your body as it yields, just slightly. It will be an exquisite dance, a slow burn of pleasure and pain intermingling. There may be tears, little whimpers of protest. But these are merely a testament to the depth of your surrender, the degree to which you are allowing your Mistress to claim you.Every inch will be taken. Every thrust will be felt.I will alternate, exploring each facet of your yielding flesh. This is for your own good, little one.I am both ruthless and gentle – a delicate balance that you are privileged to experience. You will learn to crave the sting, the pressure, the feeling of being completely at my mercy.And then... then the patience will end. The rhythm will quicken, the pace will become furious. I will pound your hole, hard and fast, until you are screaming through that pitiful gag of yours. You will beg for it to stop, but your pleas are just music to our ears.I will take your desperate cries and weave them into our own symphony of dominance.I will show you the true meaning of being owned. I will show you the power of a Mistress's touch. I will show you what it means to truly be mine.  
It sure seems like there are many, many Dominants on this site that *want* to find a sub who will desire, obey, heed, do, etc. as they direct  and tell them to do, but when I ask them, Are you worth it? they often get angry and defensive. I think instead the smart and experienced Dominant will indeed be able to answer that question from an interested submissive with an accurate, honest, and appealing list of how they  have taken care and managed themselves well, first and foremost.  I stand firmly in the Do as I say Do as I do camp within a dynamic. So many men who contact me aren't Dominant at all, and the first sign is that they cannot or have not positively Dominanted themselves to a level of respectabilty and dare I say excellence, that both enhances themselves and attracts a potential sub to their side. Read that again!  We all have physical issues, personality issues, baggage, etc., that we have acquired over the decades, and I can't fault anyone for  living life, but it's ALL in what we do with said issues and baggage that makes the Dominant and makes the sub a good match. And please, have the astuteness to know when someone is on your level or not. Think Like Attracts Like, or at least start there when contacting or considering a potential.  Be honest with yourself and that person, and always look in the mirror before heading out!   
Invocation of the Sacred Masculine     He is not only safe—He is stable, consistent, and emotionally intelligent.His presence is a shelter, not a storm.His steadiness calms the chaos in me. He holds me—In my spiritual depth,In my little space,In my adult power—without flinching, without fear.He meets every part of me and never turns away. He doesn’t just allow my surrender—He protaspects it like something sacred.He honors my trust as a gift, not a given.And in his arms, I remember:I am not too much. I am finally home.
Wow, CS has become so moribund and boring. It's been like that for a while too. I think a lot of it has to do with the loooooooooooooooooong publication process when creating/ modifying a profile. But, like any website, it is what the users make of it in many regards. I try to make my little contribution from time to time by posting in the journal, hoping it might shake something loose. Maybe someone (female) will want to engage, chat, communicate etc. but alas, it appears it is not to be.
If you'd like a reasonable answer and a good prospect of meeting me for real, message me and Don't assume any titles. You can tell me how you like to be addressed. You can ask or tell me once how you are going to address me unless I. Start with a greeting. It says so much. Not using any also tells me novels about you. Very disappointing and frustrating ones though. Tell me the reason why you contact me. Is it based on my profile and to figure out if, when, and how we'll have a real session offline? Tell me. Respect your own prospect and mine. If there is no overlap between what we are looking, don't ignore that. Don't ask me or try to play online for instance. Ask me questions if you like, but don't ask me something you can look up. You can always ask about my own definitions or opinions about something but give me context, please. I need to know why you ask. Tell me something about you but not everything, especially not right from the beginnung. Start with the most relevant information concerning your reason to message me. Open up a bit. Personal information is a give and take. Our balance gives away a good portion about the prospect to meet. Manage your expectations. This is the internet. Without closer contact, you don't know in which situation I am in, any sudden accident or sickness for example. I expect having to filter through a lot of crappy messages, people not reading, lack of manners, disrespect, crazy people, insults, plenty of people just disappearing. The list goes on. Don't expect a 100% reply rate, even from me. I am only human. It's the internet. Don't stalk or annoy (see respect above) but be patient and persistent. The only way to filter strangers is time and continuous communication. Liars have a hard time keeping up consistency. Con and scammers people don't like to invest too much time into the same contact. Trust is most valuable, time is second to that, followed by other resources like money. Try to include a question towards progress on trust, checking if it's a match, and possibly a real meeting.
It is a rule for me that I do not mix politics and kink and I've only broken that rule twice. The first time was when my daughter and grandchildren were caught in a shooting incident. Fortunately everyone survived because it wasn't the typical American indiscriminate shooting spree. Today marks the second time. Make no mistake, the U.S. has now descended fully into fascism and history, specifically Germany 1930 to 1945, already showed us how this will end.
I was a member of CollarMe, then joined CollarSpace.  This is my third account here and will be my last.  If I don't find a sincere true slave for my search then I will move on to a different website.I am 100 percent real and sincere. I want a slave who is also real and sincere. I will answer questions as openly and honestly as I possibly can.  I have set up filters on messages.  Sorry, not sorry.  The last account had way too many messages that were from fakes and wannabes.  I appreciate those who are new to the lifestyle but I am someone who lives the lifestyle as much as possible.   I am also in the process of moving and so there will be periods of time where I might be slow to respond.  If you can't be patient then that is your issue and not mine.   Sorry to sound like a hateful *itch but it is what it is.  I am here for my own search and I also do not dance or jump through hoops for anyone.
Time to clarify a few things, I guess. I wrote something to help clarify an age bracket I am interested in and why… but I guess on a sit like this I need to narrow it down a little further.   IF you were born with two X chromosomes, i.e. what the human race once called female… I have zero interest in dating you. If you live your life proud of those two X chromosomes we can be good friends!   IF you were born with one X and one Y chromosome, i.e. what the human race once called male… AND you live your life proudly as a fully blooded man, AND you are local, AND you are not married, OR living with someone, OR have a LTR significant other, AND you are gainfully employed (or independently wealthy and thus not needing employment) AND you have a residence (your mothers basement and brothers-in-laws garage do not count) AND you have transportation (Public electric scooters do not count) AND you like to chant Let’s Go BRANDON!… THEN, you have made it through the initial screening process and we can start chatting…   IF you have rainbows for anything other than the promise of God on your profile… you should probably not contact me. IF you like to wag your hand when you talk for reasons other than being Italian, you should probably not contact me. IF you have to practice speaking in high pitches, you should probably not contact me. IF you have to decide between apples and socks in your bra, you should probably not contact me (Unless the cause is cancer related) IF you need a tuck it bathing suit, you should probably not contact me. IF you have two XX chromosomes and look like a cancer patient for no reason, you should probably not contact me. IF you have a Y Chromosome and wear makeup and are not an actor or news anchor, you should probably not contact me. IF you are a bottom, realize you can contact me, but it will be friends only. (Same for most switches) IF you are far away, it is pretty pointless to contact me. I can keep going but I am getting bored and if this doesn’t get the point across I don’t’ know what will.   Oh and if you want to friend me… I am flattered… but maybe try speaking to me? I am not a check mark to tally up on your friends list, actually make a friend of me. Like a box pops up and asks you, do you know this person, are they a friend, and you click yes, and you haven’t read my profile, or spoken to me… and I am supposed to agree, and say, oh yeah, that imbecile is my buddy! Yeah, nope. I only bite if you like it…
I recently came to a realization.  I'm seeking a gent to enjoy "D/s dating".  Here's the sequence I see for this experience: **We type to see if we want to talk. **We talk to see if we want to have lunch. **As we spend time together, you may feel waves of submission.  I may feel urges to have My way with you.  We may decide to spend some personal time together at My place. **Together we would each discover the desired frequency and duration of our "dates".  
Another Week. The search continues. It's frustraing on this site. (As well as others) to the lack of interaction. What is even more frustrating is when you meet or see a profile and Domme on here that you KNOW you would be what they want. They check ever box. Age, Desires, Interests, all of them. Yet it's impossible to score an interview with them. One day..one day!   Also I do ADORE getting the messages and the views of my profile. I'd say this to the guys on here. Just create the profile in red as a Domme. I mean. It's all online anyway. Right? Fool me and play the part!:)  Still writing on LE as well. If anyone wants to read up on me there..let me know!  
It's been a few years since I was involved in a play party that was worthy sharing. I do live the slave life 24/7 and serve Master James and Mistress Tabitha. With that said the basic flogging, domestic service, run of the mill slave life isn't usually something to write about. Especially when you have been owneed for just over nine years.With that said, I have been commanded to share last  nights play with you.For the first time the BDSM group was invited over to play with me in a new way. The group consists of six Master slave couple and our threesome. All were present.Last night the atendees participated in using me for electricity and pain games.I was tied sprerad eagle in the barn. Standing with my wrists up high and wide over my head. The first game was a two litre enema, I was told to hold it for 30  seconds and there wouuld be no punishment for releasing it at that time. But if I failed I had to take a dop of tobasco on my tongue and thern on my clit. Now, I recieve two litre ebnemas often so this shouildn't be an issue. I take the enema, stand in the middle of the barn and four of the guests put magic wands on my mmost sensative areas. My body jerks but I manage to hold on.10 minutes after I complete my task another enema and this time nine volt batteries with exposed wires are used. As the guests spit on my nippels and cunnie to moisten me before I am zapped I know it's going to be hard to acomplish. I lasted 28 seconds. Instantly a drop of Tobasco is applied to my tongue and clit. I am told to swallow.It's a little hot but nothind serious. I do ok.Next I'm told the my punishment will be a drop of Carolina Reaper on my tongue and clit. Again the enema, this time four commerecial tens units are attached to my breasts and labia, but there is one exception, one of the guests puts a tens pad above and below my belly buton. The shock was horrific and I lasted mere seconds. The carolina reaper sauce set everything on fire. It was hell. It took me almost fourty five minutes to recover.Then came the last test. The last test, was actyually just to  torture me as there was no way in hell anyone could succeed at this point. One o my sister slaves from another Master adminiistered the enema, but this time two of the other slave walked over and kissed me on the cheek and neck whispering that they loved me. One was holding Ghost Pepper in a fluid form and the other a stun gun. My sister started at my clit and gently drew a line upwards towards my belly button. Half way between the two she discharged the stun gun and I lost control.Once again my ball gagg was removed, the ghost peper fluid was dripped onto my tongue and my mouth started to burn in ways I can't even describe. I'm bawling and choking and gagging. Then came the clit drop and I thought I was going to dislocate both shoulders as I fought my restrants. My throat was so closed up by the heat I couldn't scream, I was just ging and choking.Everyone in the barn was laughing and taslking about what a good little cunt I am. When I finally recovered Master walked over, said I had failed and he out a drop og ghost pepper sauce on his finger and slipped it into my ass.I have never complained about a session with my owners or the group before, but this morning I did literally beg then not to do that again. Mistress gave a gentle kiss and told me to rememeber my place and that I had begegd them to use me as they wished over nine years ago.They are good to me, but I fear tyhat I may have overstepped my bounds this morning and that I will pay a price for that in the future.
Update! (13 years later, my how time flies!) Currently cruising the yacht in the Caribbean since the global pandemic started. It's best to be isolated during these kinds of events. Much is the same as it was, so the current profile is still appllicable, but looking now for a girl that has a love of the sea and the sun, swimming and diving, enjoying life on a sailboat. (and looks good in a bikini of course!) Service is currently needed aboard, TPE in nature, but not limited to kink. Running a yacht is hard work but rewarding, so if that's something that interests you, hit me up and we can discuss the details in depth. I have high expectations, but am happy to train you for any required tasks.
Communication Matters! Open,  honest,  forthright Communication is essential.  "He voluntarily and openly commits himself to serve the needs of the dominant partner.. . and by accepting, she fulfills his need to serve. Where things go from there will vary from relationship to relationship depending on the mutual desires and unique personalities of the partners."
When we kiss When we kiss Bears and boulders Vibrate through the air i will probably do a whole post on laura veirs. her songs are little girl and softcore approved. but this song when i heard it over 10 years ago..this is love. just a simple share.   When you sing When you sing Stars fill up my eyes   Galaxies Pour down my cheeks Galaxies   Galaxies They flood the street Galaxies   When we dance When we dance Eels and sea grass float on by   I? m ten thousand leagues Beneath the sea Ten thousand leagues   Ten thousand leagues Beneath the green Ten thousand leagues   When we kiss When we kiss Bears and boulders Vibrate through the air   Gravity Is dead you see No gravity   All I need Is beating red No gravity   No gravity No gravity   No gravity No gravity   No gravity No gravity  
Cookies. I promised several people that, if this adventure happened, I would write it up and share it in my journal. well, it indeed did happen last evening, Saturday, but not exactly as I thought I had it planned.  The set up for this story is that I did some work for a woman living in a over 55 community and only charged her for the material costs which I commonly do when I first work for someone I want them to like the work and not worry about the price. she was very grateful and gave me one of those looks like she was ready to pay me back in a way if you know what I mean and then she said: I'm sure you can think of something that I can do for you and shot me a wicked smile I knew that was my opportunity so I very calmly said: Willl you bake me pecan chocolate chip cookies? She let out what could only be described as a horse laugh, which I'm sure they heard in the adjoining units on either side. and then I followed up with, but that's not all, I want you to bake those cookies naked with 8 inch by heels, fishnet stockings and garter and a bright red ball gag. there was a long pause, kind of like dead air on a radio station and she finally opened her mouth and said you've got to be kidding! I'm not burning my boobs so that you can get off on some weird fetish! And I said OK what about wearing a tight swea and no bra? I expected another flat out no response but she said yes I think I could do that. But I'll also be wearing a skirt, nothing less than that, and no ball gag! And if That isn't good enough then you can go bake your own cookies! While it wasn't what I'd hoped for, I was still going to get my cookies, so on Saturday I came over with the ingredients she told me to get, and I sat in her kitchen, drinking coffee, while she walked back-and-forth across her kitchen in her very tight, white fuzzy sweater, and a very tight short leather skirt, plus stockings and heels, and she was an absolute delight to view. The blush in her cheeks said it all. But the best part was, she was actually baking my cookies! Once they were bagged, she Pulled them from the oven, tucked the tray up under her breasts and she said, would you like a cookie little boy? YES, Yes I would! then I asked so are all those cookies in the tray mine? Or should I ask if everything on the tray is mine? She just smiled and put the tray on the counter. She grabbed me by the hand, pulled me down the hall. We walked into her bedroom and she took off her sweater., God, those were better than any cookies!  We did all sorts of things that evening and late into the night. Considerind we're both in our mid to late 60s, so it wasn't like your first high school sex, in the back of your dad's car, but it was close.  in the morning, I woke up to the sun streaming in on my face lying next to a woman who still had her stockings and garter belt on, my head nestled between her large breasts, one of her arms underneath me,the other around my neck, and I thought to myself.... life is good! Lou  
Birthdays I don't particularly like birthdays. Partly because most of the time you can never really get or do what you want to do. Partly because I don't think that you should need a special occasion to show someone that they are appreciated or cared for.  Sadly though, regardless of how hard to try to slow the time and make things last, the time still ticks away and moment come and go faster than we know what to do with. Another year older, a little but wiser, and a little yes young and reckless. I guess thats all one can really ask for. And well of course lots of tittie pics, because who doesn't love a great pair of tits. Lol.  Anyways, I raise a glass to those that didn't make it this far, and offer a toast to those still kicking.
If you think I would spit on you  And call you a cunt I'm sorry but that's not what I do. I'm way more subtle , and with far more respect To be such a prick to you. I will set you rules that you will have to obey No doubt you will break at least one every day Rules on your dress, you grooming , your place On how you must act, in our private space I will cane you for punishment,long and hard Strap you  to keep you line You will beg my forgiveness , plead with remorse Bits that's all part of this design. For a man is man , head of the house The role of the woman is to serve And when each knows their role ,then both both understand Each gets all that they deserve She will get love, certainly and discipline ,  Each in appropriate measure He will have a woman , submissive and pleasing His to always treasure.   I
Integrity:   The integrity of the Master differs from that of the slave.   A Master’s integrity is a gift He gives Himself.   A slave’s integrity is a gift it gives its Master.   One of the elements of integrity concerns behavior when no external observation is possible. The Master’s concern is how He conducts His affairs when He and His conduct may remain anonymous. When He conducts Himself correctly He can view Himself with humble respect.   If the it breaks slave rules, whether observed or not, must report such sin to its Owner. The Owner decides how the slave may be viewed. Part of the report of slave’s failings should include begging for the opportunity to gain atonement in whatever fashion the Master may decree. The slave does not indulge itself with concerns about how it may view itself. it depends on Master’s judgement for all and everything, except as Master my decide.   The slave’s integrity is measured in how well, quickly and adequatly it reports transgressions to its Owner.    
Just bought some new sexy underwear. a willing mouth and ass that should do the trick lol xx suzy xx  
This is my kind of Dominance     The Equalitarian Dom: Is one who controls by teaching, mentoring, and leading. This Dominant knows that when he finds a comparable submissive that things will happen as a natural progression of the interaction. Usually just a short learning phase is required to receive the correct response from the submissive. Both the Dom and the sub “get it”, there is very little need for so called “training” and they naturally know what the other needs and is looking for.       The Dominant does not like the situation of constantly repeating and forcing a particular behavior (submission) to occur. Besides the activities (sexual and others) it is the surrender as a result of the Domination that is the ive and enjoyment. Creativity is an important part of this situation. They tend to intellectualize and be more into the philosophical and psychological mechanisms of this life style. They understand the concepts and resultant interactions and can put it into real life. They do not need many rules like the Democratic type, nor do they like the heavy S&M activities of the Authoritarian, preferring submission to occur as a result of an instilled desire in the submissive to surrender. She “wants” to submit as a result of the Dominant’s knowledge and skill in dominating her.     Sensuousness is the rule. Pain is given and received as a form of sensuous stimulation. Light pain as opposed to severe. Sensuous torture is a popular activity in this area. Both the Dominant and the submissive must naturally be this way. These are the people who will claim to be “born that way”. They fully understand the concept of D/s, it comes to them naturally and easily. They attract a submissive that truly and naturally desires to please and who will observe and sense what it is that the Dominant is communicating;
Not that anyone reads these journals but... My first sentence on my profile states my requirements. Three or more sentences with punctuation and grammar. There's no need for perfect spelling, immaculate punctuation, or the Oxford comma. I'm well aware of the filters collarspace uses on email and I know that is out of your control. But at least try. It's obvious if you didn't try. Periods aren't filtered out. Grammar speaks for itself. So if you want a response, try. Because if it doesn't look like you tried? I will block you and delete your message. If you write a lovely email about relocating to me? I will respond then block you and delete your message. And if you send me a nasty note because of what is in my profile? Then block me? I will make sure you are blocked and then thank you out loud for saving me the effort. Ms. Elorin 
Passions of a Ghost Young and energetic MD approaches a stretch of buildings in the Sin City of New Orleans. Risking it all knowing he is outside his perimeter for Max Travel Distance from his military post, but he is dying to know what this new world is about. It is his first party within the lifestyle community with wild fantasies, expectations and fears raging through his mind. Will he be enough? How will he compare? Will he be accepted in a world which rejaspects him for being different? Questions galore which make his palms sweat beyond control. He has a few contacts already within the dungeon having gone through their vetting process. Paperwork signed and face to face meetings had, all that is left is to walk in the door. As he watches the comings and goings he see's Doms, Domme's, subs and slaves walking through a well worn door. Finally pulling himself together he walks in nervously and pays his fee to enter. Around the corner the adventure begins. Furniture of all kinds are found along the walls and in the center of a well laid out dungeon. People are talking amongst themselves, others strung up to crosses for their night's enjoyment, and yet more are preparing for scenes of their own. The energies are immediately felt and a bubbling rise is felt in his chest. As the energies are taken in he comes to understand. He is home. In the coming years this shy little Dom was able to study under some very wise, creative, and often sadistic people of all walks of life. These early days was full of dungeon parties, munches, gatherings of all kinds. There was a code of ethics similar to the military which he knew so well. There was respect. There was courage. There was acceptance. Of course there was love as well. In this community which became my world D types were hard, sadistic, and pushed hard to bring to life the fullest of potential in themselves and their s types. At the same time they still had a heart. If anything they loved their partners far more than ever written in vanilla history. Traveling with the military I traveled the country, but found myself in a different world when he got out after 3 tours overseas. The community had changed. It had evolved into something grander in size, but with so many elements which eroded the values he once knew. He walked those dungeons looking for any resemblance of the community he knew but it was nowhere to be found. Talking with his mentor she couldnt help but laugh at him. He was ranting and raving about the changes which took away the life he knew so well. He was struggling to find his way. He was frustrated how noone held themselves to a standard which made this life so great. He was lost and alone. Even in training with his partners he found them continuously pulled towards this easy shiny way of the life instead of putting in the work and patience required to get to the same level and standard as he needed. His mentor laughed hearing it all before and feeling it herself. She had long since left the community. She felt the changes moreso having come in years before he. She ranted and raved, felt the same frustrations. She battered against those walls trying to bring back those values long before he even felt their demise. After he finally stopped confused by the laughter, her next sentence said it all. "Welcome to the Old Guard" It wasn't anything official or an earning of leathers. It wasn't anything to brag about or label myself as such. It was a pure statement which helped him understand in such a profound way what he had been missing. In all that time he had been looking up like a child letting others take the reigns of the community. He didn't see myself as a leader though having over 12 years in this life at that point. He didn't find himself worthy to take up that mantle yet. After those words were spoken the whole discussion changed from what was lost to how he can be the example for those which feel that absence as deeply as he did. His drive towards mentorship and teaching drove a fire in him which couldn't be extinguished. He stood side by side with those very same leaders he looked up to trying to be that beacon. He started simply teaching rope classes but this also gave him a way to interact with people new and old within the lifestyle. Discussing the issues. Being that rock and safe haven to guide the next generation away from trouble and into a path of greater development. It was a lonely road for nomatter how hard he tried, his equal in passion for this life was nowhere to be found. If anything his role as a teacher and mentor drove him further into isolation. Experience once valued was now seen as a deterrent for many. His age showing more and more became a wall he couldn't tear down. Eventually after personal experiences which nearly crushed his soul, betrayal by the very community he loved and served for so long, he walked away into the shadows. He still had his friends and made the occassional appearances but his heart was held heavy knowing the life he knew was but smokey memories of a long gone era. Now 23 years into this life he found himself down the same road as his mentor before him. Slowly fading away as a ghost of the past. Leathers faded and worn, toys dusty and bearing the years of use, wrinkles where there used to be none, and a sense of passion still burning in his heart he still hangs on to hope. Not for the return of a community once known, but for that one which knows that same level of passion as his own. That one to walk these roads well traveled but once more. That one who he can share his all.  
Thursday night- 11-13-25. 8:00 pm i truly wish that those on here would realize that the only reason that your profile was looked at was in reciprocation  of YOU looking at mine. i cannot see who You are unless i view your profile. Also, PLEASE READ MY PROFILE!  i am 64, i am NOT seeking younger than me, travelers, or submissives. ONLY LOCAL too.   Thank you for reading my profile.  P.S. And for those leaving snide comments about how it doesn't seem to be going well  for me, i happen to NOT believe in settling or jumping into something without knowing  all i need to know and also will know who HE is when the timing is right. Thanks for understanding and BE NICE. Kindness goes a long way.
Sorry to say but I'm not going to respond to a message that just says "hi" or "hello" I would prefer something a little more than that in your first message for example "hi, how are you? " and maybe a little something about yourself. I will also NOT accept messages from someone not in my state sorry but that's just my preference. Also if you have to send me a rude message like "are you behaving" you are clearly not worth my time and energy because it is not something a complete stranger needs to know. 
If I don't respond to your multiple messages, there's probably a reason and continuing to blow up my inbox isn't going to get me to change my mind.  Also, just because I am submissive does NOT mean I am YOUR submissive. Don't come at me acting like I'm your property, or trying to demand anything of me. Until the day I decide to commit to being with someone, please speak to me as an equal, or don't bother trying to speak to me at all. 
I would truly love a woman that can write back and show the true need of being with a man like myself I don't wanna sit here and rag on this site, but there's so many profiles that speak about submission and slavery, but nobody who wants to move forward and truly  live it with someone. I've been the proud owner and master of three beautiful slaves in my 43 years of the lifestyle And many more part-timers. Feel free to reach out and open up and share your heart and soul with me. I'm very receptive. You will see that when we get to talk. Here is a new picture of me. I am 60 years old now and have many years under my belt.
I have been home for 3 days bed ridden for now. I am an amputee of my right leg above the knee. No I am not diabetic, I am handling this loss of limb better now as I think tetnus may have been running up my leg so I had to lose it to live. I am home with a wound vac and I see a nurse 3 times a week and OT and PT will be coming to work with me, and teach my housemates how to move me with a hoyer which I bought. Life is different but at least I am alive.
my take of "ALLAN POE"Since childhood, I've never been Like others were - I've never seen The world as they do, nor felt the same Passions from a common flame. My sorrows don't come from their source, And joy doesn't move me with its force. All that I've loved, I've loved alone, In my childhood, when life was unknown. From the depths of good and ill, My mystery was drawn and still Binds me, with its enduring power, From the mountain's cliff and the fountain's shower. From the sun's golden autumn glow, To the lightning and the thunder's show, From the storm and the passing cloud, That in my mind, a demon shroud. Yet, though I've walked this path alone, I've found my strength in being shown The beauty and the darkness too, That others might not see or do. For in the storm and in the calm, I've found a peace, a healing balm, That's helped me through life's many trials, And filled my heart with lasting smiles. So though I may not be the same As others in this world's grand game, I've learned to embrace my unique fate, And find my joy, though it may be late.
I'm 57 years old.  I'm not playing games but it seems like some folks are just wasting time.  I am LOOKING to take 2 - 3 slaves off the block.  I'm looking for those that can be molded and trained to be total slaves.  Slaves out number DOMINANTS 3 to 1 so I just want my fair share.  The last paragraph of my profile was written in 2018 so I've been a nomad that long.  Once I have found at least 1 slave I am willing to come off the road full time.  However, right now that it is just me, I am enjoying my Nomadic life.  Are you sincere about being a slave? Are you tired of being unowned? Send me a message, let's talk.
Goddess has been back on site for a while, and wants to clarify some about Her Profile. First, to be clear, Goddess has a fulfilling and rewarding RT Kink and Vanilla Life.  She is here to interact with devotees ONLY on this site.  No matter how deeply you fall for Me, you are not the exception. Second, I know My Profile says that I am interested in cis.  But I have been incredibly disappointed by the cis who have approached Me. you are all so dull and dim.  So, I won't be responding to most messages from cis creatures any longer.  And if you don't know what cis means, use google and join the modern age.  It's not that hard. GNC submissives on the other hand, have been delightful.  Share your dreams with Me.  
Goddess's Adoring slut The luckiest man who has ever lived is this horny little painslut. He is lucky because he serves the most wonderful Goddess there is. She is the most beautiful Goddess, the most caring Goddess, the smartest Goddess, the kindest Goddess, the most loving Goddess, the sexiest Goddess, the naughtiest Goddess, the raunchiest Goddess, the horniest Goddess, the harshest Goddess, the most fearful Goddess, the Goddess who cums the most explosively and often, and the Goddess who extracts from this trampy little skank his most delicious cries and whimpers and his most convulsive trembles and shivers and squirms. This little painslut knows his Goddess is the brightest star in the Heavens, and that he is the stinkiest turd in the cesspool. he knows that he is entirely unworthy of Her. he knows he doesn't deserve to be the lucky little tart who gets to to be Her footstool and Her washcloth and Her bondage whore and Her strap-on snuggie and Her ball gag cozy and Her clamp organizer and Her flogger fuckhole and Her riding crop cunt and Her whip wimp and Her paintoy and Her whimperbitch. He knows that he is luckiest when he is bound and gagged and helpless and vulnerable and She is extracting the most ecstatic screams and cries and whimpers from him because he displeased Her, or because there is nothing good on TV. He knows he is not worthy of being her little whimperbitch. He is not worthy of serving her, of being owned by Her, of being protected by Her, of being trained by Her, of being cared for by Her, of being harshly used by Her, of being called a good slut by Her, of seeing Her joyful smile, of being allowed to make Her cum explosively and often, and of being the lucky scratching post She so often sharpens Her claws upon.When she is at Her harshest and cruelest and most vindictive, when Her heart is hard and Her eyes are stern and Her commands are full of venom, when his screams and blubbers and whimpers are full of agony, when his cries of mercy are drenched with anguish, when he can do no right and Goddess will tolerate no wrong, those are the times that he adores Her the most. That's how She allows him to give Her the most. That's when She reaches inside him, rips out his beating heart, and consumes it whole as he watches with glee. Goddess will plant in him the seed of a new heart. Her painslut knows this from experience. As it grows, She will tend to it and nurture it and train it and punish it fiercely and grind it to dust and call it back to life and shower it with rage, and then hold it and comfort it while its agonies collect on its cheeks and evaporate into tomorrow's tender rains. This squirming little bit of nothing knows he doesn't deserve Her. He is not worthy of living in the same universe Her. But She allows it, and He adores Her for it.  
Update     I am searching for someone who wants to control and humiliate me into becomeing a permanent woman  I need someone who wants to do this to me and enjoys  seeing me submit and do as  you make me do   I am hoping for a permanent relationship  with no way out ever  debbie
It seems like we can edit this again. That's cool. I guess you lurkers can come here for updates to my life. It'll honestly mostly be vanilla stuff though. Im going through this sexual questioning phase and I'm not entirely sure of who or what I want if I want to continue to search for someone to fit into my life. I don't have the ability to mold myself into someones elses life. I have a lifestyle that I enjoy and I dont want to change it. It works for me. So for now I'm alone, well. I've got my dogs. 
24/7 Dominant/submissive/slave Contract Part 1 24/7 Dominant/submissive/slave Contract I, (submissive), with a free mind and open heart request of IntotheKnight that he accept the submission of my will unto him. I ask that as my Dominant, IntotheKnight takes me into his care and guidance and encourages growth together in love, trust, and mutual respect. It is my desire as a submissive to satisfy his needs and desires whenever possible, in hopes that I will be found pleasing to him. In order to do so, I offer him the use of my body, abilities, and purpose. Further, I ask that as my Dominant, he will accept the responsibility of using my body for the fulfillment and enhancement of both of our sexual, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual needs. In order to achieve this, he has unrestricted use of my body any time, any place, and in front of anyone as he determines appropriate. As a Dominant, IntotheKnight may bestow upon me any symbol of ownership, including a collar, as well as any other future marks or tokens he may wish to bestow upon me. Symbols of ownership are to be a visible reminder of status and will be worn with pride. Section One: Code of Conduct Duties of Servitude Above all, the primary duty of this submissive is to please.Personal Duties: Attend to the physical and emotional needs of IntotheKnight, behave as his sexual plaything, offer physical comfort, act in obedience, remain honest and loyal, wait on the Dominant as desired.Household Duties: Cleaning and maintaining the home, laundry, shopping, cooking and baking, running all errands as needed. Any task assigned should be considered permanent until further notice. Tasks may be added at any time.General Behavior. Attitude: As a submissive, I will show an attitude of respect at all times. Disrespect is a serious offense and will be punished.Respect includes: manner of speech, promptness, proper answers, obedience, and wholehearted honesty.Respect and obedience are the two most valuable ects of attitude that I will show at all times. Failure to do so will be punished. Behavior in PrivateI shall address IntotheKnight as “Sir” or “Master” at all available times. I will pay full attention to him when being spoken to.My Dominant is more important than any other activity I may be engaged in with the exclusion of immediate child care needs.I will sit, stand, walk, and lay where, when, and how he desires.Behavior in Public I will address my Dominant by his given name or “Master” at all times when there is not enough privacy to use the aforementioned “Sir.”I will remain within eyesight of my Master unless permission is given to do otherwise. -I will be courteous and prompt at all times.I will dress as IntotheKnight desires. I will do my best to always have a put together appearance in any social setting where I represent my Master.I will not argue or complain in public.Training Training activities will include: domestic skills training, offering of self every evening on bent knees, proper answers, orgasm control, anal training to increase my ability to offer every hole as he wishes, learning to present myself as a submissive full of poise, grace, and beauty in public and private, learning protocols and rituals throughout this contract on an as-needed basis; any other training activities as IntotheKnight deems fit. Orgasm Control I am to achieve orgasm only by express permission of IntotheKnight.I understand that a submissive’s orgasms are controlled for proper training and reminding me that it is with my Dominant’s good grace that sexual pleasure is brought, providing motivation, physical and sexual energy. IntotheKnight will allow me this reward when he desires.Punishment Punishment will be given for the following offenses: Cockiness/rudenessDisobedienceIncorrectly addressing IntotheKnightFailing to properly serveAchieving orgasm without consentAny other punishable offense as dictatedForms of Punishment Punishments can include: spanking, nipple pinching, cropping, hair pulling, withholding of orgasm, caning, any other punishment as he sees fit.  
Stay:   In the shadows of doubt, she starts to stray, A fleeting moment, she turns to walk away. But in the echoes of my heart, I find a voice, A plea to stop her, to make a different choice.   With outstretched arms and words unsaid, I reach for her, my love widespread. For in her eyes, a storm do I see, Yet in her soul, a longing to be free.   I grasp her hand, our fingers entwined, A silent promise, our destinies aligned. No more shall she wander, no more shall she roam, For in my embrace, she's found her home.   So let the world fade, let the night turn to day, With her by my side, forever she'll stay. No more goodbyes, no more tears to dry, For in this moment, love will never die.
Most people would describe me as the strong, silent type. I'm not a small man either. So, for me, an assertive, mentally strong woman comfortable in her physicality is quite appealing. Someone that can 'conquer' me, mind and body and make me want to please her. Of course I would also have to get to know her well enough to learn how to do that.  Just looking for a good playful woman to see how it goes, friends, LTR, FLR or other?
If you get lost I apologize the inbox gets a bit full and it's not on purpose please understand. If you get ignored and I haven't ever replied it's likely you didn't bother to read at all and just replied to a picture! I usually try to explain as alot of you are not within the age range I'm comfortable with but sometimes I run out of spoons dealing with the disrespect of ignoring the work I put into my profile.  
To be honest, I kinda thought sites like this would have seen a surge of new members and activity with everybody being confined (during covid) and all. But, it seems things went the opposite way. By and large the 'adult' sites went dead. Now though, things are once more picking up.worshipru123 -Michigan
Yes I'm here almost entirely for reading journals, the rare thoughtful empathetic intellectual exchange, and the rare opportunity to give support and make helpful suggestions to those relatively new, or looking deeper, who seek it and are appreciative of my time invested. Beyond *very* rare exceptions (none in a long time that appealed to me) I'm not here "looking" for relationship or sex or cybersex at all, and not in a long time any appealing online erotic correspondence. I'd update profile to say this more directly, but as others have said, the wait can be really very long before the profile is again approved.  So for above reasons I find myself returning to the website, and to look at this usually hidden part of the human mind and spirit, and and part present human society. For most of what I see, so much unnecessary hate and aggression but I don't need to write much about it here to condemn it..but then the gems, which don't have to be polished gems, just a person opening up, it could be non-BDSM, just writing on profile or journal about dealing with health, or dealing with the loss of life of a spouse..and you get glimpse of a human mind that's not through the usual filters. And on BDSM, or sexually in general,  similarly, being able to read glimpses of candor and the inner psychological world, an uncommon chance to read someone opening up..
Is there anything else I can help you with? You never know when bdsm enters your life in the vanilla world.  I really enjoyed living in SW Florida.  I used to live in Cape Coral which is a suburb of Fort Myers , a much bigger city where I worked.  On days off I would go to the nearby beaches of Ft.Myers, Sanibel Island or other places to sunbathe and swim.  There was a yacht club nearby where I went a lot to lay out and preen in the bright sun.  Guys would whistle at me as they moved along in their boats and I would smile.   Between my house and the yacht club near the corner of Cape Coral Parkway and Coronado Parkway was a bikini shop located in a small strip mall.  I would go in there to look at their bathing suits from time to time.  I bought a few bikinis from them.  I think it was the third or fourth time I went there that I realized they also sold adult toys.  It never occurred to me to look around the entire store when I was there.  I'd go in and head straight to the swimsuits and the dressing room and the cashier area.   Had I looked, there was a wall that separated the clothes from the toys.  I just never looked.  There were vibes, lubes and other sex toys displayed on the wall that was out of sight from the rest of the store.   On the way back from the yacht club I stopped at the store.  I was wearing a crop top and bikini bottoms at the time.  This was normal for Floridians to be dressed this way.  I bought a bikini one time and went to pay for it.  It was then that I noticed for the first time that underneath the glass counter was a whole selection of restraints and other bondage items.  I glanced at them while I waited for the owner to come to the register.  She was a tall BBW, about 50 and had long red hair.   Owner:  Anything else sweetie? Smiling Me:  I never noticed before that you sold bondage stuff.  I usually just bought bikinis here.   O:  Is there anything you want to see?  M:  Yes, I'd like to see those suspension cuffs and that spreader bar.   She reached under the glass case and brought out the cuffs and the bar.  The cuffs were very nice.  The leather was thick and the buckle was sturdy.  It was the spreader bar I wasn't too sure about.  It was made of wood and had eyebolts on either end.  It was about three feet long.   M:  This doesn't look very sturdy, at least for suspension.  Do you sell metal ones? O:  You're about 120 pounds right?  It'll hold you up.  I'm sure of it.  M:  Hmm I don't know.  I like the cuffs and I want a spreader bar but I'm not sure a wooden one would do the trick.   I was kind of embarrassed having this conversation in this store but when I looked around nobody was there but us at the time.  O:  Look, I can have you try it out in the back room if you want.  I can hook you up and you can see how it feels.  She pointed to the back room behind a curtain near the adult area. I looked at the area where she pointed and thought, well if this is a trick I can at least yell out to anyone who comes into the store.  I looked at her again and thought, well she doesn't look like a serial killer.   M:  Ok. She led me past the curtain and it was just a plain ok storeroom with boxes and shelving units and clothes racks.  There was a chain hanging from the rafter in the ceiling that hung in an open area underneath a sky light.  I put on the cuffs and she attached them to the ends of the spreader bar.  She told me to stand on a chair and she attached the bar to the chain.   O:  Ok step off the chair.   I stepped off and hung there while she pulled away the chair.  She smiled as she looked at me.  O:  How does it feel?  Try moving a bit.   I wiggled around and the bar held my weight.  I was about to say something when we heard the door chimes.   O:  Oh shit a customer.  Be right back.   She left me hanging there alone in the stockroom.  I could hear her talking to the customer.  There was a bit of back and forth.  She was gone for only a minute or two.  She came back and peeked at me through the curtains.   O:  Are you ok? I nodded yes.  She went back to front and I could hear more talking.  Finally after a few minutes I heard the door chimes again.  She came back and smiled at my suspended body.   O:  I'm so sorry.  You look amazing by the way.   She got the chair and helped me down.  She helped me remove the cuffs and we went back to the front together.  It took me a few moments to comprehend just what happened.  I just did a suspension scene in a bikini store!   O:  Is there anything else I can help you with?   M:  No, I'll put it on my credit card.    
Lady:   Lady, oh Lady, so elegantly divine, With grace and kindness that wonderfully shine. Her presence like a gentle breeze, Bringing warmth and ease.   Her eyes sparkle with empathy and care, A heart so deep, willing to share. She walks with a poise so rare, A true embodiment of love and flair.   Her laughter rings like a soothing melody, Bringing joy to all, so effortlessly. A woman of strength and unwavering grace, A shining example for the human race.   In her kindness, the world finds solace, In her elegance, the heart finds its palace. Lady, oh Lady, a beacon of light, Guiding all with her radiance so bright.   May her spirit forever inspire, Kindness and elegance never to tire. For in her, we see a beauty so true, Lady, how amazing and kind are you.
I ran over a headlight. Not a bulb, no that would be too easy. I ran over a whole headlight kit. Set. Contraption. Whatever that entire piece is called. I ran it over. But not with a wheel, oh no, that would have been too easy. It got lodged under my car. I had to pull over and get on the ground in a dress and push and pull this thing to get it loose. Yep. I think my car is okay? It didn't blow up.  You know how things happen in threes, right? The two hour tour I took the other night was one. This was two. I didn't have long to wait for three. About an hour later I drove to not one, but two wrong pizza places to pick up my order. That's right, ladies and gentlemen. I have lost my mind. In trying not to jinx myself I won't mention this being over or what else could possibly go wrong because I still have two whole days to this week and I need to make it through without calling a mechanic. And I still have to try to fix the kitchen fan, did I tell you that one? A balloon wrapped around it and the whole thing is dead. The lights, the fan, an outlet on that side of the kitchen. I know, I checked the circuit breaker. That's not it. Life is hurling adulting fast balls at me one after the other and I'm trying not to strike out. I'd settle for a walk as long as it isn't because my car stopped working because I ran over a fucking headlight. 
  York, UK, now, back in Kissimmee, FL, November 2026, staying till March 2027 We can play hard or soft and usually make it a fun session, and only do what you are comfortable with, never pay or charge not into sex, just BDSM and spanking Always play in separate rooms https://fetlife.com/users/60338 https://www.facebook.com/april.john.96/ She loves to spank hard, and he loves being given pain ( especially CBT)
Time to play.  To some, to do what I go through during a public scene looks easy.  Being suspended and whipped is panful and it took me a long time to perfect this fantasy of mine.  If one tiny detail is off, it can ruin the whole experience.  My goal is always to suffer as much pain as I can for a long as I can for the mutual benefit of my torturer.  So it looks easy because I spent a lot of time practicing it.  Those of you who do public play can probably relate to this.  Sometimes the smallest thing such as a dog barking in the background or one bond is too tight or too loose can screw things up and poof, you’re no longer in the right head space and it ruins everything.  One example of this is when I was tied face to face with another girl and we’re about to get flogged.  On paper, this should have been a hot scene but I took a whiff of her breath and it was nasty. I’m surprised she didn’t catch my reaction but I didn’t tell her why I stopped the scene short.  I made some excuse and it ended.  Next time, have some breath mints handy.  For this night, I wanted to put on a show.  I arrived at the dungeon a bit early, knowing that the attendees of the convention would be arriving any minute now.  I head straight to the suspension station to claim it in case someone else beat me to it.  I place the toy bags on a large credenza nearby and started to feel excited about what was going to happen to me.  The suspension station was all the way in the back of the dungeon and I was already seeing small groups of people milling in.  I purposely took my time to set things up.  I was getting into my head space.    
Ahh, my favorite season is here... Anything-But-Summer! I love the cooler weather in general, plus it gives me an opportunity to spend more time working in my yard. Now is the perfect time to look over my plants to see what was successful, and what may need relocated or even replaced. Once again, I'm enjoying the small surprises, such as the blueberries that have survived and even appear to be thriving in the bags in which I purchased them this spring. I'm saddened by the plants that looked promising in the spring, yet didn't survive the summer.  Much like those plants, although pleasant for a while, apparently I need to reassess some of the relationships in my life and consider finding others that have the potential to last longer and grow even more beautiful. Who wants to frolic and grow in my garden? *ominous grin*
Just some side notes: I am 47 as of spring of 2023. Not interested if you're less than 35 or older 60. Seriously. No. If your message resembles a cat call, is asking me if I'm into xyz, reads like a copy pasta or have almost no content/effort, is asking me for my number/photo/messaging id somewhere else, is disrespectful, etc. No and/or blocked. If you are 15 miles or more from JFK or LGA airports, do consider how you will be doing ALL the commuting before messaging me.  Also, I am NOT a sugar mommy. I will not reimburse you for your travel expenses or put you up unless we are in an established relationship. If and when we are in a long term relationship and travel is required, I'd expect that expense to be shared fairly. Something about fair energy exchange.  Oh, before you message me, you might want to check out my fetlife profile with the same userid. Most of it is a bit dated, I am not terribly active there. However it will give you a better sense of who I am. Let's not waste each other's time shall we? 
Why is it that when things get a little stressful at work or at home that my thoughts turn to buttery soft leather cuffs and holding a boy down lightly whilst asking him to behave? Daydreaming of edging somebody until they are almost crying is taking my attention away from spreadsheets.  I mean, that's a good thing, spreadsheets are what will eventually kill off humanity, but when somebody asks me "what are you thinking about" I have to quickly lie and say, "what to make for dinner"  
Miss May's Confessional is now open...   "Do not forgive me Miss May, for I've been a bad boy and I plan to do it again..."   This is a call to all my pervy pals to come forward and entertain me with whatever naughty diversions you've been having, real or imagined. Brag about your recent sexual escapades or confess your impure thoughts (especially regarding me <3 ).  If you're lucky I might be into it too and want to join in on your fun... Seriously, I'm as depraved as you are and your fantasies delight me! And don't worry, my sweets, your kinky confessions are confidential.   On a related note, some of you are mistaken about what the free version of femdom offers. You're here for my entertainment, not the other way around, and you'll get from me what you put in. Be interesting, be open, be willing to figure out how to stroke my ego, and then I'll play with you. I'm not going to coax it out of you either, and expect to have your persistence tested. Don't be too proud to double message me if you think your last message got overlooked. I do make an effort to respond but life does happen.    And finally, thank you to you lovely gentlemen who admire me, check in on me, and wish me well. Your compliments and attention are much appreciated <3   -MM 
What my submissive nature looks like:   I naturally end up taking care of others better than I take care of myself. I love to maintain a household and provide nourishment and comfort to all who dwell there. I enjoy pampering my partner. I’ve raised a child, I garden, I cook, I fix things and I take pride in a job well done.    Things I’m not so good at… selling myself, making big $$, asking for what I need or making the first move.   I’m sensitive and inquisitive. I care about the world. I’m drawn to ponder the meaning of life. I cherish touch, beauty, intimacy and indulging in carnal delights. I love truth and freedom. I adore feeling wanted, desired and useful to the Feminine. I adore giving pleasure… physical, emotional and mental. I adore receiving pleasure. I enjoy enduring erotic pain for another’s pleasure… and I cherish serving the will of a Goddess. 
Detecting stolen pictures in a profileWant to find out if a picture has appeared elsewhere on the web? There are three good ways I know of: Google Image Search (https://www.google.com/imghp), Tineye (http://www.tineye.com/), and Yandex (https://yandex.com/images/). Google is fairly comprehensive, but Tineye sometimes finds some that Google does not. Yandex finds lots that neither of the other two do.Just open Google Image Search and drag the pic from another window onto it* (first onto the tab, then when the tab appears, onto the main target page; a target area will appear). This is all one drag operation; don't release on the tab or you'll just go to the Collarspace profile.The same technique works with Tineye and Yandex except the entire tab page is the target.*There are some browser plugins for Tineye – but I suggest that adding plugins to a browser that aren’t necessary just slows it down; I recommend not bothering.*Collarspace sometimes does some security stuff that breaks the direct-drag URL access described above (Google will complain: "The URL doesn't refer to an image, or the image is not publicly accessible."). If the direct drag doesn't work directly, first drag the pic to your desktop, then in a separate operation, drag the result to search application.(Last updated: 10 Feb 2022)
  Hooded, cuffed, naked to the waist,  he smelled the car, heard the sounds of the engine cooling. Her smell, that too mingled with the smell of fear in his leather clad nostrils.     The door to the entrance of the townhouse was one step up and forward. By grabbing his belt and firmly tugging, she lead him up the step. His shoes stumbled, explored and found their footing.  Softly, with a definite and solid thud, the door closed behind him. The metallic click of the door lock was unmistakable.   An anti room perhaps. Mud room? Laundry room? Utility room?   The floor was ceramic tile. He realized it when she unbuckled his belt and unfastened his pants. Without any word of command or explanation, he felt his trousers and shorts pushed to his ankles. He imagined her face near his naked crotch as he felt her gripping his leg and intuitively understood she wanted his shoes off and one leg at a time his trousers were gone. Through his socks, he felt the cold hard tile.   He almost lost his balance and fell when he felt her hair brush his inner thigh as she stood up.   He felt himself shiver in the coolness of the room but trickles of sweat ran down each side of his torso from under his armpits.   Suddenly he had the urge to pee. How would he make her understand? Unconsciously he began to dance that childish dance of holding back the yellow stream.
OMFG they brought this back! So A LOT has happend in the few years that the journal section has been off, but here is the rundown, I got a divorce, found my unicorn lil mouse, got a decent job, quit that job for a slightly better job, car died, bought new used car from dealership, car has been in the shop going on 3 times in 30 days and only bought  it a little over 3 months ago....  Bought an 85 ford ranger, thought it was a gem but has been a pain in the ass with repair after repair.  Almost bring me current...  Mouse is in miami for a bit over a week on a vacation paid for by a friend.  And the people that we live with gave us a 90 day notice to kick us out YAY!  So now we are on the hunt for a cheap appartment if that is eaven possable in todays market.
I'm looking for someone who has a primary interest in real world, practical service that makes my life easier as part of a power exchange relationship. My primary is, as previously disclosed, disabled. And my secondary lives two states and over four hours away. So there's a space in my life for someone who could ease the workload a tad but also blend with my kink and D/s nature. From what I've shared, I hope its clear that you must be poly aware and comfortable with it.  And if you're not local,  you've got to have a willingness to relocate to the pine tree state at some point. 
 "£€ Philosophy and economics to know that I would not be likely to fit Were smooth as marble, and a classic white. I could see no doors   Had been carelessly knotted back together. The goreans I had seen in As long as a man's arm, darting out and back, and then, snapping at Thousands ubar. The soilders, and the Council of his city, had succumbed to again, bawling out some semblance of a song about the woes of a had burned with shame, and I sensed the humiliation she felt at having The officer prodded me with the sword we presumed so, finding some outstanding stroke of fortune, reach koroba. Would she be city? Teasing them as to how handsome their new masters would be. the tent. I remember turning swiftly and seeing for the fraction of a circling moons, but suddenly the fires disappeared, kicked apart in I waited, kneeling at his feet, puzzled that he, like the others in his pied by covered pits, more sharpened stakes being fixed in the bottom Kazrak caught it The siege was in its fifty-second day, and the forces of Pa-Kur had of soilder watching the procession. I ran blindly through the now to the streets below to rally the dispirited citizens of AR, to call them Epilogue
We can journal again!!! Oh my god I'm so excited lol. I stopped coming here because honestly the journal gotten taken down. Yay! lol I used to write in it all the time and I plan to start again. my name is J and I'm a submissive took a long long break after realizing I didn't know what I wanted. I guess I still don't but I'd love to start figuring that out. I guess mostly if I ever couod I'd want a pretty normal relationship but mixed with bdsm discipline and other fun things lol
What's in a name? Obligatory attention getting headline: Every time you say your Dom's name, you reinforce everything he is to you. I've been in this life for a long time now. I've been called many things, from Master/Daddy to everything else under the sun. What you call your Dom isn't just a cute pet name, it reinforces what he is to you every time you say it. Each name means something different, and when you use it, you’re shaping the dynamic between you and your owner. So here's what these names mean both to you, and to Them.   Sir Lets start with the basics. Here is how and when to use your Dom's name: - Yes, Sir - No, Sir - Please, Sir - Thank you, Sir - Sorry, Sir - Sir, may i... Sir is an honorary given to any random Dom out of respect to the position, not necessarily the person. Should the individual in the Dom position lose your respect, you may stop referring to him with that honorary title. The respect must be lost though, saying "it must be earned" is no excuse. While some, after collaring, choose to keep calling their Dom "Sir", most choose a new title that more clearly emphasizes their relationship roles.   Master When you call your owner Master, you’re telling him you want to feel possessed, controlled, and kept. It’s the title you choose to call your owner when surrender is what you crave, handing yourself over fully and feeling the thrill of being someone else's prized possession.   Daddy When you call your owner Daddy, you’re asking for more than just authority. you’re asking for safety, nurturing, and guidance. It’s discipline wrapped in comfort. You’re saying, “I’m yours, but I’m also protected.” For many, that mix of strength and softness is exactly what they need. There’s often a paternal craving behind it too, which is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. Embrace your desire to be cared for, corrected, and cherished the way only a protective father could.   my Lord When you call your owner my Lord, you’re putting him above you. Not just as your Dominant, but as someone you revere. It’s about hierarchy, about structure, about finding peace in knowing your place beneath his dominion. It’s old-fashioned, sure, but it carries a kind of ritual weight that can be deeply grounding.   Sire When you call your owner Sire, you’re giving him the tone of nobility, but it’s not quite the same as My Lord. My Lord is reverent, almost worshipful; it places him above you in a way that feels ceremonial, tied to the safety you find in his dominion. Sire, on the other hand, leans heavier into command and authority. It’s the word subjaspects would use for a king, not just a nobleman, but the one who rules, whose word carries absolute weight. Where My Lord can feel romantic or devotional, Sire feels sharper, more commanding. Saying it is like kneeling at the foot of the throne and swearing loyalty, not just offering service.   Mister (Lastname) When you call your owner Mr. , you’re looking at him as a figure of moral authority. It’s like the strict teacher who praises when you do well and corraspects you when you don’t. You live for his approval, and you fear his disappointment. Punishment becomes penance; obedience becomes devotion.   Vicar When you call your owner Vicar, you’re placing him in the role of a guide, someone who leads you not just with rules, but with care. It’s a name that carries a sacred weight. Correction feels like absolution, rules feel like doctrine, and obedience becomes something almost holy. You’re not just following him, you’re finding both forgiveness and salvation through him.   Maestro This is usually for the more latin-oriented as Maestro is a Spanish name. The slave who called me this was a beautiful Nicaraguan who I had named "bonita". When you call your owner Maestro, you’re seeing him not just as someone in control, but as someone creating something with that control. Maestron litterally translates to "Teacher", but think conductor, artist, master craftsman. Think of yourself as a blank canvas, and your owner as the one who will shape you.   Every name you choose carries weight: Sir is about respect, and the starting point before a deeper title is chosen. Master is about possession. Daddy is about protection and nurturing. My Lord is about reverence. Sire is about command, your loyalty sworn to a ruler whose word is absolute. Mr. Lastname is about moral authority.</
I don't think I am being a snob but I really don't want to date the following:     PE Teachers Married men Amazon drivers Delivery drivers Uncertified psychologists but claim to be life coaches (sad bunch) Boring IT guys (you guys are lazy as fuck) Men in prison usin the computers to go on CS and telling me about the wrongful rape convictions and think they can support my sexual needs online (Jesus can't even save you). I am nothing special but come on someone with a flavour for life and traveling the world or going for a long walk in Thetford Forest (with camping gear and compass). Someone who likes DX biking or countryside biking or hanging out in Norfolk going for a walk and drinking hot chocolate and coffee. Come on! I am not going to allow any deviant to spank me 
I had a long chat with an old friend of mine who is a seasoned Dom.  Very well known up north. Mentioned my most recent chat with a submissive man with a "tight balloon knot" was frustrating. Both of us had never heard the phrase but clearly a used term in the lifestyle. It was brought to my attention that submissive men go through alot of different relationships because even though they are submissive they want things a certain way. A little frustrated as I took their needs seriously but clearly they were not prepared for someone like me who was making a checklist of what they actually need from me. My family from the lifestyle did appreciate I am trying to be careful as you don't really know what other hidden knots a person has but I was trying my hardest to take things slow but seriously. In all fairness their was too much talk about the needs of his bum hole and less about my own bits so ladies enjoy your fish and chips with that one. C
Apparently it's time for a much needed journal entry, because my inbox is flooded with messages. A lot of nice messages from nice people with whom nice contact has already arisen, but unfortunately there are also a lot of people out there with (sexual) frustrations or worse. To make things clear to everyone who seeks me out to have a chat, if you have an extensive wishlist as to how you would like to be handled, kept or be treated, I am probably not for you. Submission derives from to submit! This essentially means that you follow and submit to Me and I decide where and how I am going to submit you. Being a slave, means to give up ones free will and give up his or her freedom. Eventhough this is in the BDSM way of life and completely voluntary, it does still mean that I get to kick you out to the curbes if you don't uphold our agreement. In other words, we've made a deal. You become my slave and I get to do with you however I please and you get nothing in return. Your reward lies in being My slave. Then a footnote for some nutcase I came across who felt he needed to fill my mailbox with his pedantic little finger. Nobody is forcing you to send me a message, nobody is telling you or forcing you to become my slave (it is a privilage and certainly not one for you to receive). A footnote in general: I literally receive 30 emails an hour. I am not at your disposal, but those who are chosen by me are at my disposal! Very important difference. This means that I will not respond when and how it suits you, but if and when it suits Me! That will do for now. If you reach out, either be polite or f*** off!  To all others, it is fun getting acquainted with you and talk to y'all soon. Greetings Mrs B.
I am not looking for a Master. I am not looking for anyone.  I just come here from time to time to catch up with friends.  I no longer do slave nation.  TheBeatenPath does still have shows . You can find it here  https://beatenpath.caster.fm/   and here http://beatenpathnetwork.blogspot.com/ This also has a schedule and a chat room 
== Results from bdsmtest.org ==100% Submissive100% Rope bunny99% Pet98% Slave98% Primal (Prey)97% Non-monogamist96% Degradee86% Voyeur80% Masochist78% Experimentalist70% Boy/Girl61% Exhibitionist53% Ageplayer40% Brat18% Vanilla2% Primal (Hunter)1% Brat tamer1% Switch1% Daddy/Mommy0% Rigger
I'm so happy to be back on Collarspace. This is where it all started for me....about 10-ish years ago when I was just finding out about BDSM and really exploring my kinks (which is currently still evolving)...With that being said... being here is so nostalgic because I've met some amazing people here over the course of years. I'm especially excited to run into some old friends here. So a quick story time....years ago when I was here one of my friends from MIDDLE school found me on this site (not really sure HOW) but we had really good conversations and he talked about the way I use to treat him in middle school as far as being very bossy, dragging him around, TELLING him that he was my boyfriend made him KNOW that he was meant to be a sub/slave. It really put a lopt in perspective for me too because it showed me that this was in fact a n inherent part of my personality....to dominate...to take control...to be the boss...and it came to me so easily...so long short, I'm hoping that i run into this guy here again that would be amazingggg... either way I'm looking forward to the connections I foster this time around. 
Are there straight , masculine,  professionally successful men that would willingly be committed to become a slave/submissive in a FLR TPE relationship ?   I am earnestly curious to know if those type men exist out there. Most RT inspections I have chosen to set them up as dates. Quite interesting to see who's willing to be who they say they are and quite literally go the distance and drive/fly to get a chance to serve at My feet.  the princes pretending to be submissives and only desire is to be charmed, woed and courted as a vanilla Woman into submission tickle Me.  Please do not have issues with who you say you are, or attempt to charm or win Me over while pressing the breaks. Sort out your issues (age, status, financia ones, logistics) before even attempting to message Me.   "thank You so much for meeting me yesterday. You are truly charming and a Woman who knows exactly what She wants - and that is a dream come true. You are of course also very beautiful and desirable as a Woman - quite delicious actually!" Last compliment from a slave. Who after dinner cowardly simply just walked away. Smart move, rather disappointin still.   
I don't like them innocent I don't want no face fresh Want them wearing leather Begging, let me be your taste test I like the sad eyes, bad guys Mouth full of white lies Kiss me in the corridor But quick to tell me goodbye You say that you're no good for me 'Cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve And I swear I hate you when you leave I like it anyway My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul you used to be? You're a Rolling Stone boy Never sleep alone boy Got a million numbers And they're filling up your phone, boy I'm off the deep end, sleeping All night through the weekend Saying that I love him but I know I'm gonna leave him You say that you're no good for me 'Cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve And I swear I hate you when you leave I like it anyway My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul that you used to be I'm searching for something that I can't reach My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul that you used to be Ghost by Halsey (it's a song)
There should be a place to go where you can fuck and feed. I remember with my ex we had sex pretty much 24/7. Call it the fuck and feed. Never found someone to keep up and even he complained about too much sex. Alas he was the only one I could just make/go get a sammich and we went right back it. We had sex in all the strange places graveyards temples churches, besides anywhere outside  We didn't discriminate.  This one time I dropped off my friend told him I'd pick him up in an hour my ex and I had sex in the car for the whole day we never stopped. My friend walked to my car (which was a parking lot) knocked on the window and said "some hour it's been over 12". My ex and I honestly thought it was like 10 mins. I have no regrets - just miss the sex all the time every time with a massive BBC. This i something of the past I don't want to stay there would like a repeat thanks 
Here it is years later and still the same guys looking for the same old thing. While I don't mind the admiration from those who contact me, it seems like all they want is to be dominated and used sexually. When I ask them what else can they offer, all I get is the usual. "I'm a great cocksucker." "I'll take your hands up my ass anyday." "I'm great at house cleaning" YADDA YADDA YADDA!!! If all you're going to offer me is a piece of meat, than no thanks. Do you have a brain? Can you understand big words and know how to use them? Can you put a sentence together without a lot of ums and uhhs? Do you know what's going on in the world? So if you're a box of rocks, with not a brain cell in your head, move on move on. And here I am....still looking. Sigh!
Well It is Reserved its accomodation at Hotel Zero, VIP passes x3 for Montreal Fetish Weekend and flights booked. I had guests fetish Model friends from the UK and another Dom who was claiming it till something happened to him coming all with it. Now it feels lost that it might be going to this event by itself. Till it finds it feet there and hopefully like other Newbie first timers to this MFW event we get thru The Meet and Greet cocktail first night event on the 29th August and meet others to connect with especially for the play parties.
10 Please Join Us DECK THE BALLS Party Let’s make this holiday season unforgettable! Save the date for our Deck the Balls extravaganza. Wednesday december Las Vegas Strip
The stick shift was prominent and imposing. He knew what to do and eased it into gear. She sat turned towards him. With her left hand she softly gripped the back of his neck. With her right hand she started to unbutton his shirt.   Her attitude and demeanor softened as she directed him to drive off into the night. Not given an address, turns we’re made on her instructions. Right here, left there at the next light.   After what seemed like an eternity he was instructed to pull up a ramp to a townhouse garage and as if by magic the garage door opened and closed behind them. Mindful of carbon monoxide, he shut off the motor. The two sat for a moment in the dark both the garage door light and the interior dome lights having timed out.   Her left hand now gripped the back of his neck firmly with authority and she made her demands.   She told him he had a choice. He had to decide immediately. Get out and leave. Walk away and forget tonight ever happened, or go around and open her door with the understanding that he was surrendering his will and body to her.   He stuttered, fumbled his words and choked out an acceptance of her demands. The door opened, he helped her to her feet and she produced a latch key. From a cabinet hung on the garage wall she retrieved a black leather hood. She ordered him to put it over his head. Once in place, he realized it eye holes were covered and a rubber mouth piece similar to a scuba diving hose was forced into his mouth. She laced it tightly and he heard  a lock click around his neck. Swiftly she slid off both his jacket and shirt together. Bare chested he felt the chill of the room as she pulled his wrists behind his back and heard the handcuffs ratchet closed. She put her hands around him from behind and fondled his breasts and pinched his nipples. A low grunt escaped through the mouth piece. He could breathe freely by nose and mouth through openings designed for that purpose.
What Are Your Kinks? As a submissive sissy, I get that question frequently.  The answer is as fluid as the journey I am on. I see my kinks as a living breathing thing that demands exploration, particularly in my embrace of submission and the desire to fully experience that dynamic. My kinks are centered around the power exchange, especially as I continue to learn what it means to be submissive to a dominant man. It’s about finding the balance between trust, vulnerability, and allowing myself to be fully immersed in the role of servitude. I also have a fetish for the feminization process, loving the way it brings out my true self and helps me feel more aligned with the woman I am becoming. In essence, my kinks and fetishes reflect the ongoing discovery of who I truly am after so many years of pretending, and each step I take deepens that understanding.
Our second date. You call to make sure your demands are to be met. She is freshly showered with the smell of perfume, sensual lingeriie covering her laser shaven pussy. Nails painted, hair done and her glistening anal pluginserted. No other clothes are allowed for this meeting. He has had his orders, shorts but no shirt, no socks, and hairless from the waist down with a touch of aftershave. His cock strainingnagainst the cool steel of his cage. both of them are giddy with excitement, nervous too about the meeting and what may happen. On our first meeting you were strict and controlling, your inspection of us humiliating, your cane was thin and hard and sometimes overpowering. in the pub where we met you had told her to remove the g string and put it on the table, another older man next to our table had seen this and he couldn't keep his gaze away, desperately wanting to be in on it. He could overhear your questions to us, our shame in telling you we needed you and the damage and enhancement to our lives you could bring. As we left the pub on our own you followed a few minutes later, your new friend in tow. We pointed to our car and you sat in the back of the car with the wife and this man, quickly she became naked hands on her body and I watching from the front. Her breathes became shallower unti she orgasmed fingers in her pussy. her hands full of cock, only after your balls were drained did he leave us and you followed our car home. Our first test com0lete you said
  I wrote that word control to you yesterday and it must have gotten deep into me. I woke up this morning so fucking wet and hot! Like I was right in the middle of some Daddy's masturbation...I was on my back, legs spread, rubbing my clit and mound, thinking of Daddy being under me, his cock rubbing my lips, telling me words of his encouragement and his control, deeply feeling my sexuality himself, telling me to spank my hood, which I never do, but it felt so right this morning, so I spanked it rhythmically, then back to massaging my clit and mound, going a bit harder and deeper with each back and forth, feeling Daddy's cock getting harder, his growls and voice deepening as he and I tuned into the groove of our joined pleasure.  I started spanking myself harder now, legs further apart, imagining his cock now dripping with pre-cum, inching it's way between my labia, feeling the pressure of just the head inside me, filling me just enough so we could be connected in passion. My mind slowly turning off, becoming totally his, his toy, his Daddy's precious love, as my rubbing got more robust, my internal dialogue starting to seep out into my voice with a moan a muffled cry for Daddy, Daddy, Daddy...until I hear his knowing! His understanding! His feeling! of me being ready, reaching the point of no return, the edge of the cliff of the frenzy for becoming one with him, giving myself to him, him owning me in this incredible throbbing pulsing intimacy of letting go into more Daddy Daddy Daddy I'm going to cum...and just faintly hear yes baby girl, yes, cum for me...and then I'm over the edge, flailing a bit, squirming, moving, thrusting to get his cock into my lips so he can feel my quaking my rupture, my cunt dripping with a gush, spasming...as Daddy holds me tight, firmly, let's me fly away with pleasure, in his arms, cumming strongly, with abandonment...his, found, grounded, complete, held...
Hey everyone!  subMeghan here... As always, as required by my dom, I need to announce to you all that as I type this I am naked wearing only my dog collar... Just a quick journal entry.  My dom and I just finished an awesome puppygirl session and I have been informed that I was was a very good girl!  Yay!  Now my dom has decided to reward me and is using a vibrator on me right now.. He thinks it would be funny to watch me try and type as he is pleasuring my pusssy. However, he said I can't cum until I finish this journal.  He is watching me type this and laughing at me.  Good thing I have spell check!  Ha!  I am not allowed to speak to him, if I want to say something to him I must type it here. My dom says to tell you if I'm a horney slut.  Yes, I am a horney slut!  Please my I come? He says not yet.  Damn!  he has turned up vibrator. he knows what i like/  He says type louder.  OK, I AM SUBMEGHAN I WANT EVERYONE TO KNOW THAT I AM A SUPER HORNEY SLUT!  PLEASE MAY I COME NOW, SIR!!!!!! nO?!?!  WTF!  pLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I WANT TO CUM SIR111 ok.  yes sir i'll say that, then can i cum?  my dom says show everyone that your a dumnb cunt and bark like a fuckng dog.  WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!  STUPID SUBMEGAN IS DOG!!!! i am barking thank god, ge says i can come after i say goodbye.   bye
It's been a while.  This site is interesting in that those who seek, stay.  Those who are players, wander.  Based on my profile, I stay. I'm always looking for someone who is willing to keep me.  I'm a slave, afterall.  I seek pain, agony, gasping torture.  But I am also seeking the ability to please.  I want to be the one that seeks to be a pleasure for you, since I derive great pleasure in being able to make you smile. So, lets, connect.  I'm sincere.  Are you?
1-Do not call Me Mistress. Call Me Queen or QueenDr. And when you are owned,Owner. 2-do not use you-yours-yourself.ALWAYS capitalize the 1st letter "You-Yours-Yourself"
After years of being in D/s relationships, I've come to realize that I am just not capable of equality in 'vanilla relationship'. I gave it a shot but discovered how unfulfilled, frustrated and dispirted I became when engaged in a relationship with a partner as 'equals'. Dispite attempting to gravitate away from any D/s aspect within a relationship, my natural instincts and habitual tendencies always found a way to emerge subconsciously without my realization. My inner desire would have me doing things that used to be commonplace as a domestic slave but were highly discouraged during my attempts with 'vanilla relationships'. My therapist believed I subconsciously believe I am not worthy of love, but I disagree entirely. My love for submission, service and dedicating my every waking moment in pursuit of another individual's happiness is love on a different scale. She says that's just obsession and addiction, I told her she didn't know what happiness and life is about. I explained how in my relationships in D/s, happiness is a product of my devotion, loyalty and making my owner's life simpler, less stressful and more fulfilling in all aspaspects, which directly impacts my happiness. Because of this mantra, I compared serveral situations within a D/s relationship compared to a vanilla relationship. I discussed the difference in communication, expectations, and how shared responsibilities can foster underlying resentment. Then as a final point I looked to civilization's history and explained how up until the 1960's, culturally women were expected to be submissive to their men, remain in the home, be seen but not heard, cook, clean, provide sexual pleasure rather than receive it all while putting on a smile and looking good. I explained that in a nutshell, those general principles are some of the basic things I crave in any relationship. I genuinely receive pleasure from making othera happy in any capacity. I then asked her if her husband evokes even a percent of those qualitie.......I told her no response IS a response, thanked her for out final session and exited the room.  So to sum things up, I'm back here again in hope to find someone with similar values, aspirations and ambitions in life. It's always darkest before the light.
What can we get from this chapter of the bible symbolically?    Edom: Kingdom of Esau (carnal mind/flesh) Jacob: Tribe of Judah (spiritual mindset)   Well we can see throughout scripture that the Edomites were disregarding the spiritual things and had a carnal mind. They took things by force and lacked patience for cultivation and growth. They were prideful and they held grudges and were hateful.  God pronounced judgement on them for their pride and for them not letting Israel pass through safely. He said because they say who can bring me down that He would bring them down and have them despised.    Edom stood by when strangers took captivity of Jacob's army. Edom was a brother to Jacob who is in the Tribe of Judah. Yet Edom acted like the strangers which took Jacob's army into captivity. Do not gloat, rejoice, speak arrogantly, or stand at a crossroads to slaughter the escapees when the Tribe of Judah is attacked because the day of the Lord against all the nations is near. The way you treat others will come back on your own head. There will be no survivors of the house of Esau and the house of Jacob will become a fire to set the stubble ablaze and consume Edom. The kingship will be the Lord's. The ones who care about their spiritual health and have a relationship with the Lord will be safe but those who continue in the flesh will be wiped away. There is more to life than fleshly desires and carnal things.    Those who are in Zion and left over in Jerusalem will be called holy. The survivors whom the Lord calls. Zion can refer to the "pure in heart". Jerusalem means city of peace and holy. Jerusalem is also used as a symbol for the redeemed state of humanity and also signifies a place of deep religious connections, divine presence, and the pursuit of peace.    Get in Jesus while you can and remember to be loving towards everyone. Don't be fleshly carrying out the desires of the flesh. Have a spiritual appetite for the spiritual things. And remember don't gloat or rejoice in someone's downfall. Love your enemies it's commanded and judge not. Be encouraging with one another lifting each other back up. If you love Jesus you will observe his commands and he will love you back. Faith without works is dead. Come on!! It's time to wake up from our slumber and cultivate a relationship with Jesus. He's coming back and coming soon. Will you be fo und ready? 
Ok ok, I am now Ohio.  The info on this profile can't be updated.  So I add via Journals or the LastSamurai2011 profile. Currently 59 years young.  And if you have questions, feel free to inquire here or the for mentioned profile. Owner of {sakuraai}LS and We are seeking a third to join Us.
At first, they pleaded for me to be tolerant. I obliged.   Next, they requested that I accept. I acquiesced.   Then, they demanded that I include. But I learned that to include is to convert. I did not want that, so I politely declined.   They insisted, refusing to take No for an answer. I stopped accepting.   They condemned me. I stopped tolerating.
Greetings. I am searching for a sub or a slave that knows his place and will serve me in multiple ways. Would certainly enjoy if he/she could serve my feet, rub and massage them, lick them, be trampled under my feet, used as a footstool for a long period or time. Am also into facesitting and a lot of other naughty things. I am from Europe, Czech Republic. Not into online relationship, so before you write me, consider if you can really come for a visit, because I am blocking and ignoring everyone who will waste my time with promises.
I was enslaved by older master in 1980 and served my Master until His death in 2017. He made it clear from the very beginning that I had to be dressed in nylon stockings with suspenders as part of my slave uniform. He in no way wanted to feminize me.  He even wore pantyhose himself as a natural part of his daily attire He was 12 years older than I and extremely masculine and authoritarian. A white collar and wealthy Master. A man who weighted obedience and discipline. A Master you dared not do anything but obey. As time went by he became more and more demanding. Discipline and obedience were not up for discussion. His word was law. Love and fear were two sides of the same coin, and he managed to make me fall in love with him. I really feared disappointing him, as the consequences were merciless punishment, be it lack of love disobedience and mistakes as well as ruined nylon stockings I had never been with a man sexually before I met my master, but his power over me constantly drew me closer to my Mater and deepened my slavery and I ended up loving him and becoming addicted and I ended up feeling it as a reward when he commanded me to suck his cock, swallow his cum and drink his urine and even to kiss him He took total control and quietly increased my slavery until eventually there was no way out of slavery  Nylon stockings developed into a strong fetish and I connected my master’s power with his pantyhose. His legs were strong like a former footballer and the tights emphasized his masculinity and strength He was married when I met him, and for several years I served my Master more or less daily at His office. He owned His own business. He widowed ten years before he died so His last ten years my service was moved to His private estate then on I became his total slave. My slavery was greatly expanded and without any limits.   Master had a friend with whom he often shared me during some years. He was then required to wear pantyhose too which he did with no problem.   
Okay let's try this again.  Kicked off the month with the headlight. Not long after that I am pulling into a space at work and a wheel well cover thing falls off of my car. I've been driving around without it, no idea how important it is but I'm sure I'll find out soon enough. Follow that up with taking the trash out one night and the bin hitting and cracking the rear tail light of the car. Perfect.  Let's move beyond the car, shall we? I'm hosting all of my parents for Thanksgiving. For the week, really. I plan out a full menu, hit several stores for every ingredient. Buy a giant turkey so I can make things like turkey soup and turkey pot pie afterwards. Two days before T Day one parent gets covid. The next day another parent gets covid. They aren't coming. I'm down to one parent showing up and roughly four bajillion dollars worth of food. Sigh. But okay, their covid symptoms aren't too horrible and that's what really matters, so let's get back to me. I power through. Fancy Tuesday night dinner. Afterwards I brine the turkey. It's going great, I'm nearly done, just need to add a little more water to top it off. I turn to the sink to finish. And that's when the brine bag tipped over and a river of salty herbal apple cider rushed over and into every nearby surface. At 10:00 at night. There's a lake on the stove. I don't mean a splash of liquid, there's depth to it. A tsunami flowed over the stove, between the stove and counter, all over the counter, into drawers, down into cabinets, and onto the kitchen mats and the floor. Did I mention it's 10:00? Right. Thankfully the entire bag didn't tilt so I refill and hope for the best so I can start kitchen recovery. An hour and an entire roll of paper towels later, I have emptied full drawers into the sink, pulled the stove out to sop up brine and all the herbs down the sides of the stove and counter, washed the floor. And all I can do is laugh, because November is kicking my ass.  But wait, there's more. My dad is in charge of the pie. He brought some ingredients, can't find them, asks me to look through his things. Sure, I can do that. Unzip compartments to take a peek. What am I looking at? It doesn't fully register and I nearly put  my hand in to pull it out. Then it hits me. These are sex toys. Big fucking EW. Why would he not remember that there are things in a bag his daughter probably doesn't want to see? November is trying to kill me.  I met a man. He was interesting and I liked him more than I planned to. Besides being a nice person, we seemed to be on the same page about a lot of things, and that's rare for me. And then he disappeared. Then reappeared. Then disappeared again. I'm chalking it up to bad timing. Oddly enough, the most recent ex is sniffing around. A lot. I have no idea what to do with that.  If CS had not been hungry and eaten the original version, you would have also read about the work thing, the arguments with my dad, and my traitor dog. And there would have been comedy sprinkled throughout. But I'm tired. So this is a poor second attempt to document why November is the absolute worst and there are still several days left. I give up. November wins. 
My Fool, My Leash, My Afternoon - a Fantasy for a Future slave   The morning of the faire I lay his costume out on the bed with the particular satisfaction of a woman who has planned something she intends to enjoy thoroughly. The motley is excellent, deep jewel tones, the bells on the collar catching the light, the cut of it deliberately absurd in the way that only works on a man with genuine physical presence. Foolishness on an unimpressive man reads as foolishness. Foolishness on a man like him reads as theater, as choice, as the most interesting thing in any room he enters. He understands this. He puts it on without comment, with the quiet dignity he brings to everything I ask of him, which is itself part of what makes it so delicious. The leash attaches to his collar with a sound I find unreasonably satisfying. I am wearing the corset, deep burgundy with black lacing, the kind of construction that does what good corsetry always does: makes the architecture of a woman into an argument that cannot be refuted. My skirts are full, my shoulders bare, and I carry myself the way I carry myself everywhere, which is to say as though the ground has been expecting me specifically. We make, I think, an extraordinary pair. The Goddess and her Fool. The implicit story of us readable to anyone with eyes and the wit to use them. He walks two steps behind me and slightly to my left, the leash held loosely in my right hand, and I feel the particular pleasure of his presence the way you feel good weather: as a condition of the atmosphere, something that improves everything around it simply by existing. The faire opens around us in all its chaotic, fragrant, anachronistic glory and I move through it with the unhurried ease of a woman who has nowhere to be except exactly here. It is the stocks that I have been thinking about since I planned this outing. They are positioned in the center of the square, heavy oak weathered to silver, historically accurate in their construction and entirely available for use by willing participants. I steer us toward them with the gentle but unambiguous redirection of the leash, and he feels the change in direction and does not ask where we are going. He has learned not to ask where we are going. "In you go," I say pleasantly, nodding to the attendant, who opens the upper board with the cheerful efficiency of someone who has done this many times and finds it no less entertaining for the repetition. He folds himself into position. The board comes down. His wrists and neck are held, his posture suddenly and completely at the mercy of the construction, and I step around to face him with my hands clasped lightly in front of me and look at him with the full and unhurried attention I reserve for things I am enjoying very much. He looks up at me from his locked position with that expression. The one I have catalogued. The one that contains too many things to name. I lean down until we are level, my face close to his, close enough that the bells on his collar would brush my cheek if either of us moved. Around us the faire continues its noise and color, children running, merchants calling, the distant sound of a lute being played with more enthusiasm than skill. No one stops. Several people look. Some smile. I do not acknowledge any of them. "Comfortable?" I ask. "No, Goddess." "Good." I straighten and produce from the small bag at my wrist a piece of the honeyed pastry I purchased at the last stall, and I eat it slowly, with evident pleasure, directly in front of him. He watches. The bells are very still. "You look," I say thoughtfully, tilting my head, "exactly right." A small crowd has gathered at a comfortable distance, the way people gather around anything that has the quality of performance, and I am aware of them the way I am aware of weather, peripherally, without concern. I reach out and adjust the bells on his collar with one finger, a gesture so proprietary and so casual that I hear the quality of his exhale change completely. "We will stay here," I inform him, "until I finish my pastry and decide I want to see the falconers. Which gives you approximately," I pause, taking another unhurried bite, "as long as it takes me to eat this." He says nothing. His eyes do not leave my face. The afternoon light falls across the faire in long gold bars and my corset is exactly right and my fool is exactly where I put him and I am, in this moment, precisely as content as a woman who has arranged her Saturday exactly to her specifications has every right to be. I take a very small bite.   I am in no hurry at all.
I guess the thing to do is Post the resupts to this, so here it is.  Can't say I believe it is really accurate becuse there were many statments that had more than one statemement within them, and I agrees 100% with only half the statement... The quandry of my brain lol.  I mean, if anyone who is following my journals, read the entry right before this one, you know I am 100% NOT 66% Masochist lol == Results from bdsmtest.org ==  100% Submissive  97% Brat  66% Masochist  64% Rope bunny  57% Vanilla  52% Degradee  47% Experimentalist  45% Primal (Prey)  33% Exhibitionist  31% Slave  12% Pet  0% Daddy/Mommy  0% Rigger  0% Voyeur  0% Switch  0% Sadist  0% Ageplayer  0% Owner  0% Non-monogamist  0% Master/Mistress  0% Boy/Girl  0% Dominant  0% Degrader  0% Brat tamer    0% Primal (Hunter)   
You guys!!! I did it!!! I booked a beach trip over Christmas! I now have something to tell my family when I say I'm not coming for Christmas. I'm so freaking excited!!! It's a small place, but it's right on the beach. I'm bringing books and more books and my dog. Maybe spaghetti. I've not had pasta in forever, because carbs. The beach!!! This is huge for me. I don't put myself first, especially when it conflicts with making other people happy. I know I'm going to be nervous when my family confronts me, but its such a good choice. I swore last year was the last Christmas, and I did something about it. I'm so proud of myself! I can't wait to fall asleep to ocean waves. 
  What is meant by online friends? An internet relationship is a relationship between people who have met online, and in many cases know each other only via the Internet. Online relationships are similar in many ways to pen pal relationships.    
Not hearing from him is absolute agony. I don't understand not talking to your partner for this long. Even if mad at them. I get I screwed up, but I would and do miss my partners after just a day or two of not speaking. His resolve is way stronger than mine though. The not knowing is just gutting me. And no I'm not going to elaborate on this to anyone else I haven't already explained it to. I'm tired of explaining it repeatedly and people not understanding or respecting what I'm saying or talking trash about him, trying to convince me to walk away so they can have a chance at me even after me saying that won't happen.  i just want to talk things over and make things right again. 
8/12/22 Football player gets what he wants Football player boy came over for the first time in quite a few months. So I knew his ass was going to be tight, and I wasn't mistaken.When he first arrived I was sitting in my rocking chair wearing only a pair of boxers. I had been playing with myself so not only was I already heard but I had pre-cum oozing down my cock.We've been getting together for quite a number of years, so he doesn't even have to be told, he strips as he walks through the door. As he was stripping there he exchanged a few pleasantries, how have you been, it's been a while, sorry I'm a few minutes late. I just pulled my cock out from my shorts and said, come take care of this.He got down on his knees and took my cock in his hand. He saw the precum dripping from the tip, and licked it off.  Then he immediately latched on to my cock taking it all the way to my balls.    He has an outside job so he's been in the sun a lot. I don't think I ever remember him looking this tan. His hair is cut extremely short this time. His broad shoulders have a new tattoo since I saw him last. The view looking down at him is incredible.I rested my hand on the back of his head feeling his rhythmic bobbing up and down on my cock. He knew exactly what he was doing, I didn't need to guide him in any way. Although a few times I just wanted to hear him choke on my cock, so I applied pressure on the back of his head until I felt my cock head bottom out in the back of his throat.This went on for a few minutes, but I remembered something he told me during his last visit. He wanted to expand his repertoire again. Originally many years ago he had a girlfriend who would peg him. They broke up and he couldn't find another girl to peg him. That's when we met. And at the beginning all I was allowed to do wish of toys up his ass.Years later, many patient years later, he said he wanted to try sucking cock. Months after that he wanted to taste my load. It has been fun watching him change over the years. And now he wants FUCKED by my cock. This is what he told me at the end of our last session quite a few months ago. Today was the day.We went downstairs and he climbed into the sling. I secured his ankles high into the air as he scooted down in the sling to give me plenty of access to his hole. He doesn't like the roughness of my fingers, so I slipped a pair of rubber gloves on, applied some lube and started playing on the outside of his ass. Normally I just dive in with one or two fingers, but today I wanted HIM to WANT IT extra bad. I wanted him to yearn for it.I teased the outside of his hole and I could feel him lunging in the sling by grabbing the chains and trying to push himself onto my finger. But I was just teasing him at this point. I reached up and stroked his cock a few times, and then went back to teasing his hole.Eventually I gave him what he was yearning for at the moment, I slid my finger deep into his ass with one swift movement. My finger landed on his hard prostate. Some days his prostate is kind of soft until I get him sexually excited at which point it gets hard as a rock. Today, it was hard as a rock the moment I touched it. I applied a little pressure and noticed pre-cum ooze out of the end of his cock.With one finger still up his ass massaging his prostate, using the other hand I smeared his pre-cum over his cock head and started stroking it. He threw his head back and looked in the mirror above us on the ceiling of the basement. I was watching his face and his eyes as he intently focused on every movement I made.As expected his ass was tight. Wonderfully tight. But eventually I worked a second finger into his hole. I don't know where he learned to clean his ass out, but he does a better job than anyone I know. He's definitely a pro at cleaning himself out, and that means I can use larger and longer toys.But for now I was just working him over with one and then two fingers. Occasionally sliding a third finger in. I watched as he gazed into the mirror above us and I gave him a bit of a show. I pulled my fingers out and put my index finger as deep as I could. Then I would pull it out and replace it with only my middle finger twisting my hand around as I played with his prostate. Then I pulled my middle finger out and replaced it with my ring finger and little finger at the same time, I spun my hand around again.I pulled my fingers out and replaced them with my index and middle finger, the easy way. Vertically, aligned with his ass crack. But then with a twist of 90°, he was getting my fingers the hard way. But he was doing just fine. He was enjoying it as much as I was.His cock was hard and I continued to play with it. And then I did something I usually don't do. And you would think I was doing it for his benefit, and I want him to think I was doing it for his benefit, but this was just a little treat for myself. I took the head of his cock in my mouth and started twirling my tongue around his piss slit. I glanced up and saw him throw his head back, I think his eyes might have rolled backwards a bit toward his skull.I continued sucking on his cock until I had his entire cock in my mouth. I bobbed up and down a few times and he started to moan incredibly. I know from the past experience that once he orgasms were done for the day, as with most guys. And there was no way I was going to risk that. So I popped my mouth off his cock and continued working on his ass putting a third finger in.He loves CBT so with my fingers still firmly planted inside him, I grabbed a wooden spoon. I started smacking his balls lightly at first but rhythmically
Winners and losers can often be distinguished by their propensity to take action and their inclination to serve others. Winners are those who recognize opportunities and are willing to step out of their comfort zones to seize them. They understand that success requires effort, resilience, and a proactive attitude. Winners don't shy away from challenges; they face them head-on and learn from their experiences. Moreover, winners often find fulfillment in helping others achieve their goals, knowing that service enriches both their lives and the lives of those they assist. In contrast, losers tend to be more passive, often waiting for the perfect moment or fearing the risks associated with action. They may have great ideas and potential but lack the drive to bring them to fruition. This hesitation and inertia often lead to missed opportunities and regret. Additionally, a lack of willingness to serve others can limit their growth and connection with the broader community. Ultimately, the difference between winners and losers lies in the willingness to act decisively, persistently pursue their goals, and contribute positively to the lives of others.
Master James pased away at an age that was far to young. Mistress Tabitha and I were devistated. Massive stroke.More now than ever I'm trying to be the perfect slave to help Mistress Tabitha and I get through these times. The house seems to empty without that deep strong laugh or the sound of him calling out to me "Wench! Where is my coffee?" and then he would laugh.We will survive but there is a feeling of loss and yet my heart is so full of love for him. He will be missed
A woman's orgasm is her glorious gift to him. When she focuses upon delivering it to and for him, she acknowledges her passion to unhesitatingly submit her humble bliss unto him, without regard to her trembling spasms of joy. She conveys that part of herself to him intimately and fully, ignoring her own shuddering waves of stimulation. <<"'Take and enjoy what you have aroused in me. It is yours.'" >> She surrenders her pleasure unconditionally for him to bathe in her euphoria. He is the true beneficiary. She is the incidental receptacle, simultaniously the vessel of and conduit to his satisfaction. This is love. Your pleasure is my pleasure. N'est ce pas?
Don't waste your time sending stuff like this ....         Hotel room to myself Sat April 9 in Lexington and Sat April 16 in LouisvilleWant blowjobs Dated:   4/1/22 9:16 AM    
Who I Am I believe Mastery begins with self-mastery. I know what I want. I know what it costs. I have the discipline to follow through. Structure isn't a constraint for me, it's the foundation of Mastery. Yield control of your body, behaviors, and attitudes to me, and I will apply equal discipline in sculpting you into my vision of feminine perfection: a strong, confident, beautiful domestic goddess who knows her place is to love, serve, and please her man, and knows exactly how to do all three while being held to the highest standards.  Such a treasure is rare, and to be valued accordingly.   What & Who I'm Looking For Conversation by message primarily.  Perhaps supporting someone in exploring their submission and its link to femininity and inner nature more deeply, whether that be just talking about it, coaching, or some degree of connection. Your understanding of where you are is not important, your interest in discussing it is. I am open to and interested in messaging with a range of women at different places in their understanding of themselves.  I also love hearing about woman's fantasies (even if they'd never consider living them out), as I write a good deal of erotica and am always looking for good plot material.  If you've got some to share, who knows, maybe they'll make it into my next novella. Some women may just want to chat with someone who genuinely knows this life and will talk about it honestly, without agenda, without pressure, and with equal interest in its non-sexual dimensions as in anything else. That has real value and I mean it when I say I'm glad to have it. Some are further along. They know what they are but haven't found the right container for it. They want something structured, something that builds over time, a real dynamic even if it lives at a distance. That interests me as well. And then there is the woman who knows, somewhere beneath the surface, exactly what she is but hasn't found someone who could be trusted with all of it. The need is there, but not the means. A woman who wants not just to be led but to be genuinely shaped. Who understands that submission at its deepest includes being remade over time by someone with a clear and considered vision of what she is and what she could become. That isn't something I take lightly. It is the most intimate thing I know how to do. I'm open to exploring that with the right person, but it is not something I will enter into lightly. If the right person and the right circumstances were to intersect to where something in-person were to eventually become possible, I'm open to that too. That isn't a promise or a goal I'm pushing toward. It simply exists as a possible future out on the horizon, honestly named for what it is. Wherever you fall in that range, if this life calls to you in a way you haven't quite been able to satisfy or understand, reach out. You don't need to have it figured out first. If you find me interesting but are interested in something else - long distance dynamic, roleplay, casual conversation, whatever - reach out.  Who knows, maybe you've thought of something I hadn't even considered. One thing worth knowing: my natural orientation is toward depth rather than breadth. While something is still finding its shape, genuine conversation can begin with more than one person and I welcome it. But I'm not built for maintaining multiple meaningful connections simultaneously. When real depth begins to develop with someone, my attention moves there and stays there. If that means a conversation with someone else has run its natural course, I'll say so directly rather than simply go quiet. That's what honesty looks like in practice. That kind of focused, undivided attention is simply what I prefer to give.
The Throne Room Our friends were meeting us at the dungeon.  We tried this scene at home and we ended up pulling out the ceiling chains from the rafters.  The set up was for suspension not stretching.  So we planned on doing this stretching scene in the throne room at the dungeon. That was the plan.  The set up was simple.  I was going to be in the middle and our friends were going to be on each side of me.  My wrists were attached to chains that went to the ceiling and the excess chain hanged down on each side of me so that our friends could pull them.   The dominant watched from the throne placed in n front of me.  She would give the order and the chains would be pulled and I would be lifted onto the air with my arms pulled wide.  That was the plan.   For this scene I didn't have much to do.  All I had to do was strip down to my string bikini bottoms and attach chains to my suspension cuffs.  My arms were spread wide as I waited for the order.   "Stretch her!"  The husband and wife on either side of me started pulling the chains.  But they struggled.  By flexing my biceps I was able to fight the chains.  Two more friends who were watching joined in.  Now there were two people on each side of me pulling the chains.  By flexing my biceps I was still able to fight the chains.   Two more people joined in.  I now had six people trying to pull me apart.  I was now on my tiptoes as my arms were being pulled wide and I was being stretched.  Two more people joined in.  I now had eight people, four on each side, pulling the chains that were now stretching me.   I was now lifted off the floor with my arms tightly stretched by the chains.  I let out a long moan of pain as I was being pulled apart.  My torturers looked up at my torture stretched body and waited for the order  "Enough!" They let go of the chains and I dropped to the floor.  Spent.  
Hello Horny Ones!!!!   At this point, I will be here soon to answer emails stacking up.   Promise.   As to the general thread of life, I am still not on here to hook up, chat about sex, or similar.   I find myself more interested in connecting in other ways and on different levels.   As such, more interested a shit ton of other topics over sex, and doing a lot more in my life for me, than sex.   You will find me on Twitter more than here.   Later, Lola the Iron Mistress
What I am looking for in a new partner? I identify as a Master who lives for consensual TPE M/s dynamics. I have been in the lifestyle for over 20 years. I am not a switch! I have experience in a lot of BDSM and SM practices and what I do not know I love to learn. Here is some information about me that you may need to know first before you decide if I am the one you wish to serve. If I sound particular and demanding-like, that’s because I kind of am. I don’t need quantity. I desire quality. I want one or two of the good ones; one with a whole actual, entire, functional, language-enabled brain who knows how to use it. One with a bit of passion and integrity about him. Anything worth having is worth the work and effort to make it happen. Building trust takes communication and continuous effort. It is something you must work at to keep and it is also one of the hardest things to regain once lost. That level of complete trust is what makes Master/slave dynamics work. But trust is needed on both sides. The Master has to trust the slave just as much as the slave has to trust the Master. Ok.. so here is what you need to know about Me: My preferred terms of address are MsPebbles or Ma’am. Anything else is not acceptable until you have earned it. I am a married cis woman with one child still living at home. I also have relationships with others. You need to be ok with not being the only person in my life. I am demisexual,demiromantic, and bisexual. I am a non-smoker, a social drinker and a lover of wine. My hard limits are sissification, age play, humiliation, degradation, scat, brat taming, race play, extreme breath play, death fantasy and bull/bbc culture. I will add to the list as I find things that I will not do. What I need in a dynamic is communication, honesty, transparency, respect, loyalty, effort, consistency, and service. Someone who enjoys pain is a plus but so is someone willing to explore new things. I am not just dominant in the bedroom. Having sex with me is not a guarentee for you. So if you think this is going to be just kinky sex with a woman in charge, please move along, we are not looking for the same thing. I am a compassionate, friendly, happy, relatively “normal” human who seeks compassionate, friendly, happy, and relatively normal men or women. What I mean by this is, while I am dominant and seek true power exchange with the right man or woman I also seek cuddles, conversations and yes I am going to say it … INTIMACY. G I know right? As a Dom I like control, A lot of it. Shocking right? I love s-types who are naturally and deeply submissive and who desire to give themselves freely and fully to me on My terms. I am looking for a sub/slave who is willing not just to get down on his knees, but also to be emotionally real with me. This involves communicating clearly about your emotions and who you are and what you need, not necessarily about all that you want. I want to dominate a mind and a soul, not just a body. Enough about me (I know, rare words indeed from a dominant). Let's turn the spotlight on you. What is it that I look for in a potential slave?
Demons We all have them .Just some are better at hiding them. Or think they are.WE choose what to do with the ones INSIDE us.The ones we see everyday.You can't hide them for long.We learn to deal as we get older and perhaps they go away. O just find a better hiding spot That not just little things make them show there ugly horns.Perhaps Our loved ones help with keeping the triggers away. Who really knows.Till you've tried on the shoes make sure that you can walk in them ESPICALY if there NOT your shoes.The demons in ones head can choke a priest.Med ya say? WHY I say?Groundings oneself can help. Meditation can as well. BUT do the demons ever go away completely?Sure when one is dead and gone maybe.How we deal is what makes US STRONGER.Take my hand and I'll help all I can.Without hurting myself of course .May the goddess and gods guide and help you be at peace within oneself.( By KA) me
As for presenting herself for a full inspection or examination there are a couple of ways this can be done. She has undergone inspections in the past as most Doms like to fully inspect her at the beginning of their ownership.Her present Dom carried out a full examination of her not so long ago.Normally I clear the sitting room table.I have a duvet which fits the table perfectly and a pillow making it comfortable for her to lay on for a long period.I dont know how long you take to conduct such an inspection but I know by experience they can take over an hour to completeShe is then placed on the table with her arms secured above her head. A chain attached from the top table legs to the cuffs on her wrists keep her secure.The same for her legs although I normally use a leg spreader for her feet so she is then firmly secured in a spread eagle position.A small cable around her knees attached to the lower table legs assure her legs are kept wide apart throughout the inspection.This allows full access to her open vagina.Inspections or examinations can be very erotic for the inspector although can be humiliating for her.It is certainly humiliating for me, the husband having his wife inspected in such a manor. Sometimes the husband is allowed to stay and assist other times the husband is sent out of the room so the examination can be carried out in private..Please let me know your preference.Normally the head is examined first, the hair ears and mouth. Her last examiner inserted three fingers in her mouth and made her suck on them for a few minutes to test the power of her suck.Then of course the neck and arms and underarms which is free from hair as it is removed regularly.Moving on down to her breasts and nipples. no piercings or tattoos, her stomach which you will find is flat. then her quite long slim legs and thighs and of course her vagina which is very attractive as well as being soft and smooth. On inserting you fingers you will find her vagina is very tight despite being well used and she becomes very wet very easily. Masturbating her with your fingers for just a few minutes will get her extremely wet.There is a speculum available if you want to look deep inside her.She can be untied and on her knees for an anal inspection.She can of course be inspected in the standing up position if preferred.Again please let me know your preference.
Hotel from a sluts POV   We check into the hotel and as we are standing at the desk you brush your arm 'accidentally' across my nipples which are swollen and tied sticking out under my top being constantly rubbed and I'm trying to hide them as I know they are really visible. The reception definitely can't see my swollen tied clit or the sink plugs in my arse and cunt that are stretching my holes right in front of her but she can see in my face that I am slightly flushed and breathing a bit heavily. I wish she would type faster!  Finally we have our key. You tell me to walk ahead of you to the lift, I know this is so you can watch me on my heels in my tight skirt trying not to walk like a Slut full of cock.  We are in the lift alone and you take advantage of the time to rub over your handy work on my tits and cunt making me shake and cry out. And Cum inside myself. Unable to release it because of the plug. You smile at me and laugh at how ruined i am tonight. Already begging for you to fuck me.  In the room i stand in front of you with my hands on my head and my legs apart and wait for my master to tell me what to do next. You stroke over my body and sharply pull my nipples, bringing me round from my drift and then sit me down firmly on a chair in the corner and opening up a bottle of champagne that is on the desk. I am wriggling in the chair, trying not to moan out loud with the anticipation and my holes open.  You pour us a glass and turn around and sit on the sofa opposite and tell me to crawl over to you. I slowly crawl across the room my nipples rubbing on my shirt my clit rubbing when I move my legs because it is so swollen. I get to you and you tell me to kneel...  You lift me into your lap by my nipples making me get tears in my eyes and roughly hold me by the neck sideways on your knee...  With your free hand you pass my drink and tell me to drink it I am thirsty from breathing hard and knock it back. You put the glass down and spread my legs and tap on the plugs in my holes staring into me while I beg you to open me up and touch me inside....  You pull the sink plug out of my cunt tube leaving it held open and poke up inside me so I can feel the tip of your fingers deep in me but nothing where the tube sits making me really aware that I am gaped....  I can hear myself begging... Please Master, fill me up with your fist and cock I need it so much. .... then I feel a bit of a lurch and sway into you, I can still hear myself begging and moaning but everything is getting a bit weird and I realise, as I pass out that you are telling me that when I wake up I will get what a Slut deserves......  I don't know how long I am asleep.  I come to hog tied.  It is dark so I am blindfolded  I can't hear anything except my own heart and inner voice.  My mouth is now plugged like the other holes.  I wonder how this going to go!
She had spent the previous hour obeying his commands, staying in her allocated space, removing clothing when told, displaying herself when ordered, her shoulders ached from being held back to display her breasts, then from being held between two pillars, her thighs ached from being spread as she struggled to hold position. Now all she was wearing was a white G string, wrist and ankle cuffs, which he had used to spread eagle her between two pillars as he applied the flogger, concentrating on her back, bottom, thighs and stomach, but no part of her had escaped its attention. Once again he felt her roughly between her thighs, examining the scrap of material to see how wet she had made it, only eventually announcing she was wet enough. He released her, and immediately clipped her hands together and ordered her to her knees and elbows and to dip her spine, removing the tie sided string he then forced it into her mouth and then positioned himself behind her. His instructions were short and to the point, the first time he would enjoy her from behind, she would receive less stimulation that way so letting her concentrate on using her internal muscles to pleasure him. The crop would serve to remind her if she transgressed. He took a handful of her hair, pulling her head back he slowly entered her, ordering her when to tense her muscles as he also enjoyed the heat from her sore buttocks against his stomach.  He took his time, often she transgressed and paid the price of the crop, until she felt him slowly release.
In an effort to keep this journal better updated... To me..I feel the "perfect" Domme has to be in that age bracket of 35+. It's about experience, EDUCATION, and an ability to know what it takes. The proper research, having a real world lifestyle in place. Being somewhat SETTLED in with a life and career.  Now..the PERFECT age range for how my minf works? 50+. That is where I find my goosebumps get the biggest when I see a profile view, or message. GOOSEBUMPS.
Someone asked me exactly what I'm seeking, I'm posting it here rather then waiting forever for my profile to be approved...   A male unicorn....someone that is a true sex slave......whos be all, end all is pleasing me, and me alone. Someone who doesnt need humiliation for me to control him. Who gets off on the mind fuck of the lifestyle, and doesn't try to top from the bottom. Ive never actually Owned anyone before, so, he has to be willing to explore with me, and allow me to.........experiment on him.....he also must be good in bed, Im no size Queen, but he has to have enough to actually fuck with. He also must be very oral, because while I enjoy sex, oral is definitely the best way to get me off......
I'm done looking I think I may even close my account and walk away from the lifestyle.  I'm tired of devoting everything and getting nothing. Over the past couple of months I had one that couldn't communicate worth shit and the other I really clicked with gave everything in the process of getting to know him he claims he goes after dinner and now the account is gone. We that are honestly putting ourselves out there don't deserve to be discarded like fuckin trash. So unfortunately I'm going to disrespect every fuckin dominate on this site go fuck yourselves and leave me the fuck alone I deserve better than this shit! 
hii sorry to interupt if we have already been talking and perhaps "planning" on getting together i just felt this is a pretty important piece i must mention generally to anyonoe who visits my profile    first thank you if its ur first time on my profile :) heeehe  repeat offenders i well come anytime i love the attention id love to be ur piece of eye candy Heeehe which  i do got more pics but havent uploaded due to the delay that happens and i cant reallly offord a delay since im using this as my main source to escape ... thank you collarspace ;) please dont disappoint    okk so feminization the process which ive started and learned how much more i enjoy life as so. i began HRT and was shocked on the results and conviced this is exactly who im supposed to be :)  i was scared to fully flourish when i started since ii was still living at home.. mom; her druk dumb fukin BF; and my little borther. you could see why i was intimidated to allow HRT gracefully.... i was on and off of it,id say maybe 4months yes, then 4 months no. then 2 months yes. then 3 months no. then 1 month yes then mile stone; family fell apart.... hurts but they hurt me literally no reason.. i was caught in the crossfire of his drunk ass running outta beer money every week blamed me always went throught my stuff, talked shit about my panties would often throw away my CUTEST jean or the combination of cloths that blended my image so amazingly it would allow anyone; who saw me, immedatly know i was a sissy BUT NOT JUST ANY SISSY ;) --yeah would thow that out. iIt happed A LOT but like twice on my most cuties most amazing look that brought confidence and lust lol. okay so my "familly" offically fell apart about 45 to 65 days ago i think give or take ... it occured in about a two week hostile setting. which i wanted no part of because it originated between THEM!! yes i had nothing to do with it i even stayed away from home for days on end to let them deal with their own bullshit... however, out of the maybe 4-6 days that i did come back, cuz jesus i was tired of being out there! somehow the arguments were about me... saying i dont work i dont pay rent --- like umm excuse me ?? dont pay rent? ------------------------------{{{{oooo i love this song}}}--------  k sorry, where was i     --dont pay rent??? then hand me a bill..... nothing ... repeated bout 4 times and still no bill .. i HAD moneyi just wasnt gonna had it to them so he can turn around and just get more beer...  i did everything expect around the house AND MORE  spacifically to prevent any turmoil since yes i didnt pay rent BUT NOT cuz i couldnt lol ... no bill no rent stupid drunk [[[im sure i got completely off my main point but god i feel so good to vent i dont have anybody right now]]] yes totall off topic if your still reading dang i appreciate your intrest in me lol *blush blush      ok i remember what this topic was supposed to be about lol soo sorry went completey right field.. yes right field cuz im left handed >:P lol    i becan this journal entry cuz i wanted to inform those who have a chance in owning me at the moment their a 3 im considering witch one i just hope will be the right choice  fingers crossed   so this as ALL ABOUT FEMIZATION ohh and the whole artical up there does have a good purpose  When i began taking hormons, the fluxuation of on off onn off if you notice the ended with with 1 month on following a 3 month halt.... if you think about the proceess of my feminity you can picture about where im at in my appearance .... BUT WAIT IM NOT UGLY haha  im not ill thow a pic of me rn or send in a message cuz i dont wanna have to do that waiting period this website impliments uppon profile updates. sooooooo when i finally went back to see my doctor to FINALLY GET MY HORMONS again... stupid governer Desantez signed a bill that took into effect just the day BEFORE my appointment making it SUPER SUPER HARD not just for minors to get gender reassingment medication! my doctor straight up told me no! she will not give me my hormons because xyz...i was planning on getting a 4 month batch after explaining to her i was leaving florida to focus on myself and my tranisition... lol more like to focus on YOU and my transititon heehee ;)   theirs more to this but i chose not to disclose due to risk of prejudgmental dissisions, id say about 93% of you WILL MAKE regardless if you, think ur so mature or what not..   ((lol prejudgmental is that even a word? hahaha idk but sounded good there ;))   ** ooo i just notice my spell check wasnt doing its job... crap im sure when i reread this im gonna have to delete it dammit  enjoy the read and the insite of my current situtaion stay safe out there and masters/mistress/..potentual sissy owners.... [iSeeKu]