Ally’s Thoughts: Feeling overwhelmed and defeated? It’s okay

August 6, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 12 Comments

Hi friends and readers,

Some days I can’t help but feel overwhelmed and defeated. Sometimes, working too hard, feeling too much, chasing uncertainties, and being emotionally drained can wear me down. However, I learn that it is okay to feel this way. I learn not to resist. I learn to accept. I learn to let myself go through it and experience it.

What I would usually do is lie down and sort my mind. Slowly going through all the thoughts then combing and filtering each one. Some give solutions and some are just not worth my mind capacity. So, I just let it go. I’ve learned to let things go.

Though there are times that I don’t feel like letting go. Something feels so worth it. No matter how much reasoning I had with myself, I keep holding onto it. Funny that I thought I had put a lid on for closure. Yet, it’s still there. What is closure when a part of me still holding on, right? It’s okay. Slowly.

Sometimes, things are moving slowly and things don’t happen immediately. Some things take such a long time. It’s okay for me to feel overwhelmed and defeated now. I need to gather my strength again. Then, keep going and push through again.

If it were the younger me, who doesn’t know how to navigate myself in such a situation, I wouldn’t recover. At least now, I know what should I do.

How do you deal the days when you feel overwhelmed and defeated?

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SEAPOWRIMO 2023: DAY 1 (I am the living dead)

August 6, 2023August 5, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ Leave a comment

Day 1: Write a 1-minute spoken-word poem in the style of your choosing.

What do they mean by the phrase ‘the living dead’?
Is it about a ghost?
Is it even real? Exist?
I don’t believe in them,

So, let’s break this down,
Is it about the dead?
Being alive,
Walking around behind our backs,
Waiting to make a jump scare?
Like in the movies?
Did they learn from the same director?
Probably,

Or does the phrase talk about the living?
They feel that they are no longer alive,
They are breathing,
They walk among us,
Taking the same train,
To work,
Repeating the same cycle,
Nine to five? No!
Six to twelve? Yes!
Every single day,
Six to twelve,
And the rest of the time,
Is to sleep, drop dead,

I’m leaning toward the latter,
Because I was a living dead,
Not a ghost,
Not a spirit,
But I am not alive,
Even though I breathe,
Even though I walk,
Even though I eat,
Even though I am surrounded,
By people,
From the kindest,
To the nastiest,
I was not alive,
I am the living dead.

ps: As this is a spoken-word poem, I will be posting the spoken version on my Instagram a little bit later today. So, check out my Instagram if you want to hear the spoken version. Click here.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

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Live well friends and readers!

To the hands of insanity

August 5, 2023August 5, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 1 Comment

Let me dream,
Let me dream,
Give me an escape,
From the stiff reality,

Let me meet,
Let me meet,
With love,
So I can sleep eternally,

Do not wake me up,
Do not wake me up,
Do not give me,
To the hands of insanity.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

You can also get 50% OFF from Transformation Academy courses and membership by using the code ALLY50 during checkout.

Live well friends and readers!

The screaming happiness in my heart

August 5, 2023August 4, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 2 Comments

Every lovely song,
Would remind me of you,
You whom I never knew,
Till we shared our future together,

Allow me to take your hand,
And let us dance along,
To the lovely tune of the piano,
As we claimed the moment ours,

I’ll sing along,
Even with my croaked voice,
So I could set it free,
The screaming happiness in my heart.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

You can also get 50% OFF from Transformation Academy programs and membership here by using ALLY50 during checkout.

Live well friends and readers!

To words he owed

August 4, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ Leave a comment

How fancy of a poet,
To write all the words,
He wanted on paper,
And that is all his treasures,

Words of wisdom,
Words of uncertainty,
Words of those who need,
Words of those who rejected,

A poet wrote it all down,
Yet all for himself,
Yet is for his reminder,
Yet, for none others,

How sweet the words are,
How bitter the words are,
How mind-twisting the words are,
How suffocating and numbing the words are,

What else does he have?
To words he owed.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

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Live well friends and readers!

Ally’s Thoughts: 吞 – Su San feat Season Chu

August 4, 2023August 4, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 6 Comments

Hey friends and readers,

I’m currently stuck at the time when you can’t get off a good song out of your mind. Simply because it is on repeat thanks to my brain. Plus, it has been a while since I have a song that keeps on repeat that I have to share it here. So, let me invite you to check out a Mandarin song called 吞 / Tun by Su San featuring Season Chu.

Check out the song here:

Apart from the slow tempo rhythm and some surprises in the deep basses, I really like the line that I can relate to in my daily life.

于是我将它吞进诗里

so I swallowed it into poetry

I’m using Google Translate on this one.

The line reminds me of every time I have to go through a lot of things. Each step I took to get here, the sweat and tears just to get through my everyday life. What do I have to go through all those? Poetry. I write them all. The thoughts, the experience, the pain, and all the hardships.

I may not be at the destination I want for now but this feels like a checkpoint that I need to be connected to myself and my journey. While the song may talk about a different matter but in a way whatever happened to us, it shaped us and became a part of us.

Take a couple of minutes to listen to the song 吞 / Tun by Su San featuring Season Chu and let me know if it resonates or sings to you!

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

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Live well friends and readers!

I took my time

August 1, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ Leave a comment

Photo by Admiral General M. u2b50u2b50u2b50u2b50u2b50 GodShepherdly 33277089* on Pexels.com

I took my time,
To sit down,
Lie on the ground,
To feel profound,
Of the things that happened,

All those days,
And those minutes,
Going through it,
Like picking up my pieces,
Then try to glue it,

It looks like jigsaw puzzle to me,
But the shapes keep changing,
It doesn’t fit but that’s all I have,
I need to mend and adjust,
To solve it one by one,

Foolishly thought,
I made it here hard,
But after all the journey,
A view from a bird-eye perspective,
The vast walked road but larger paths ahead.

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Yet, I am dying slowly

July 30, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ Leave a comment

I am really happy,
To live things in my head,
While the reality is empty,
I’ll treasure the things I have,

Even when you won’t,
See me exist at all,
I will still be here,
Even if you don’t care at all,

It is really funny,
To feel beaten and hurt,
By my own mind,
Living in my own world,

It is really funny,
To chase on someone,
That never look at me,
When I am in front of them,

Do not be like me,
Living in fantasy,
It should be a safe space,
Yet, I am dying slowly.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

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Live well friends and readers!

Remind her of me

July 28, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 3 Comments

I’ll write more about love,
Even though the one in me,
Has been long empty,
Probably even in the future,

I’ll write more about love,
Like how I care to hope,
A fist of wishful thinking to sow,
With hope in me, it will grow,

I’ll write more about love,
No matter how vain,
With all the pain,
Growing inside my vein,

I’ll write more about love,
Hoping she’ll see,
Even a single word here,
Remind her of me.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

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Live well friends and readers!

Of the Sun I’ll never see

July 28, 2023 ~ Ally L. ~ 1 Comment

Every moment,
For every breath,
Pumping the blood,
Through my whole body,

Every second,
For every step,
Draining the strength,
Of my lonely soul,

I’ll be the ghost,
Scattering at night,
Looking for warmth,
Of the Sun I’ll never see.

If you enjoy my work and want to support me, do download my ebooks. It helps me a lot if you read it and share it with others. You can also tip me HERE. I really appreciate it.

You can also get 50% OFF from Transformation Academy programs and membership here by using ALLY50 during checkout.

Live well friends and readers!