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RAMBLINGS OF A MIND UNTAMED

past. present. future.


[sticky post]Sticky 2.0 Journal reorganised.
piano
whitewriter
Never too late to return to an old friend.

Journals are like best friends who never grow old, never married or have children, never have careers with commanding time, energy, space.

Like gold they hold their value. Waiting for your return.

This journal has chronicled my senior high school years, my university years. Then my journey to professional HCP, The beginnings of new grad, and then radio silence.

Let's pick up the story.
There's 8 years worth to tell.

In the spirit of confidentiality:

MICH major inner city hospital
MSH major suburban hospital
SSH small suburban hospital


Running list of frequent shorthand I will use:

NVB - normal vaginal birth
G - Gravida (how many pregnancies in total: which includes miscarriages, stillbirths, neonatal deaths)
P - parity (how many babies born)
IOL - induction of labour
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My tweets
castleland
whitewriter
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Update
castleland
whitewriter
RIP NexusCollapse )

I had horrible pee again overnight due to what I think is dehydration. So at 340 am I sat up in the kitchen drinking at first 1 cup of water, and then 1 cup of cordial (I find it really hard to drink that much water) and then 1 of hydralyte before I thought I was hydrated enough - to go back to bed at 420am - and have some random sleep until 6:20. I don't have an alarm clock (phone's dead) so at 5am when Pete woke up I was alert enough to tell him to ensure I got up by 6:30 (cause, I still want to attend work -- Lord knows why because I really should have just phoned sick at 3:30am).

I was thinking at 3:40 am, how when women are dehydrated and how that effects the fetal heart rate on the CTG and how they get IVCs and 1 liter of hartmanns and how they all look stunned when we're all surprised that their heart rates are 120 ish. Mine wasn't that high but I was worried. Need to make more of an effort to drink water at work... with these darn masks.

But here I am. At work anyway. Playing hooky (at the bedside of GCS4 SAH grade 5- the not homeless lady).


So what sucks about working is trying to antenatally express is impossible on 12 hr shifts, let alone with sleep deficits.

Today's patientCollapse )

36+4
castleland
whitewriter
It's just all too real now.Collapse )

Dea is having an IOLCollapse )
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Friday 29/1/21
castleland
whitewriter
36+2Collapse )

Remember when I said everyone baby's me because I'm pregnantCollapse )

I was informed on handover that my pt today is homeless, but turns out - that she isn'tCollapse )

names...
castleland
whitewriter
I'm supposed to do 20 but I'm stuck on only a handful.
namesCollapse )
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Ja's stories
castleland
whitewriter
On the day of the chest drain debacle - I worked with an old colleague Ja who has 2 kids.
- the same one who had 2x c-section because her midwife at an appt decided she didn't have a body type for NVB (and this was in the last 10 yrs so talk about outdated thinking..) Ja had an ecmo case that was super sick and busy and went to IR for a procedure, and I had... Mr chest drain. So somehow in her crazy busy day, she found time to impart some wisdom on me... (nurses and some cultures can be so superstitious...)--


Story 1
Ja has 2 friends, both were pregnant at the same time. One prepared everything for their baby and the other one, didn't. The one who prepared everything, had a nice kid, all is well, happy ending. The one who prepared nothing- had a stillbirth and didn't have another child again.

-- this one gave me poor sleep 'cause the front room isn't prepared, and I spent a large chunk of time on the weekend cleaning it out and hassling Pete to move the unsafe chest of draws from taking up floor space to taking up cupboard space inside the closet, and then moving the bed around to front of the fireplace to make more space for the cot/change table/set of shelves. In the end I've got a really charming room out the front now with shelves that have little toys (some mine, some new from friends) and I've let Pete keep some of his maths books and random gift statues on there which actually add to the charm of the room. Stocked the baby change table and sprayed some nice smelling room spray and it looks like a guesthouse!

Thanks to Ja's story for making my butt move faster. I now have a nice room for the baby should it decide to come tomorrow. There's a few things that's missing/needs upgrading but nothing essential.



This one is disturbing so if you don't want to read it, just don't.Collapse )
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Never thought I'd say this...
castleland
whitewriter
Things I miss about night shift
-It's a pure set and forget shift. You take handover, plan your night, and 90% of the time you just follow the plan.
Obs. Meds. wash. more meds. more obs. handover again.
Stare at someone hopefully sleeping most of the time. Wake them up for a GCS or by accident opening that packet of N/S 100mls (oops)

- No managers around (or limited management staff)
So you can be naughty whilst your patient sleeps (eat snacks)- and if your pt is sedated and/or paralysed, have longer time to chat with other staff members (less so if pt is trying to sleep).

- Few (if any) scans or tests : other than your 0200 bloods, or if shit hits the fan: you don't have to pack up your patient to go anywhere for a scan, and then have the hassle of unpacking them and catching up on things you missed while you were gone. Going for a scan at midnight generally only happens in an emergency, where things have really gone sour and your night is going to be shit anyway, and your pt is probably intubated and sedated to the high heavens so at least you don't need to deal with whining or confusion.

-That the first night shift was like "another day off" as was the day after your night- shift. These were "reasons to chill day". And although it was shitty that you had to work at 08:00 on your day off , you still had the whole day to do whatever you wanted (sleep, mostly). Overall it's a chill time.

Nurses make the worst patients
castleland
whitewriter
Today's ethical dilemma: do I play florid Christmas carols at the bedside of an intubated, retired 61 yr old nurse who had an attempted suicide (note left).
The note had strict Do not resuscitate (DNR) and Do not intubate (DNI) instructions and a list of her Power of Attorney (POA) and Next of Kin (NOK)Collapse )

35+0
castleland
whitewriter
35+0Collapse )

lucky meCollapse )
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