Philadelphia Jewish Matchmaking

People who are…

→ Dating in the Philly area (either living here or willing to date here)

→ In their 20s and 30s

→ Jew-ish in any way you personally define it

→ And by the way: any gender identity, any sexual orientation, any commitment structures! We are queer, gender, kink and poly affirming.

Tribe 12 is a donor-supported non-profit 501(c)(3) organization. Our mission is to connect people in their 20s/30s to Jewish life and community in Philadelphia today so they will choose to stay connected tomorrow. You’re on our website right now! We have about 150 events a year, everything from sports leagues to huge happy hours to a community for entrepreneurs.

Here is the history-on-one-foot: while in grad school, the founder of Tribe 12's matchmaking initiative, Danielle Selber, watched her religious friends use traditional Jewish matchmaking to find love and thought: why can’t everyone have that kind of help and support? To explore that question, she completed my master’s thesis on the history of matchmaking as it applies to modern Jewish dating. She started Tribe 12’s matchmaking initiative in 2017 to put some of the findings into the real world and it grew organically into one of Tribe 12’s cornerstone programs. Tribe 12 sees finding a partner as a core need of many people in their 20s and 30s and are thrilled to be able to help so people don't have to do it alone.

Matchmakers hate this question because it doesn't make sense! No matter what, you're comparing apples to oranges. In Tribe 12's case, we are the only non profit matchmaking initiative in the world, so there is no way to compare our success to other matchmaking models.

We define success by opportunity -- are we increasing people's chances of finding a partner by giving them dating opportunities they would not have had otherwise? We also celebrate success in facilitating positive dating experiences, regardless of outcome, in a world where dating can feel lonely, not fun and even unsafe.

For numbers people, we are proud to have met one on one with 800 singles (and counting…), hosted over 200 original events and facilitated over 50 serious relationships!

Our matchmakers meet with each person for one hour via video chat. The goal of the conversation is to get to the know the person, the relationship they are looking for, and who they are looking for. Questions range from basic demographics to personal interests to dating preferences to dealbreakers. Each person is entitled to a free one-hour intake conversation! There is an optional donation of $36 for this service.

After one of our matchmakers get to know you, their goal is to give you access to our broad network of hundreds of people in their 20s and 30s who are dating in Philly’s Jewish community! Here are some ways that plays out:

→ Be your own matchmaker: Our recommendations and introductions to communities, organizations and events where you may meet like-minded people on your own

→ Invitations to rooms you should be in: Our public Tribe 12 events, series and opportunities which match your interests; plus private events which are by invitation only, with a guest list curated by our matchmakers to bring specific people together around something they have in common

→ Personal introductions: Connecting you directly with someone else that has met one-on-one with a matchmaker at Tribe 12

Tribe 12 is a 501c3 non profit. We ask for a completely optional, one-time donation of $36 (which can be completed now, later or never here). In addition, there is a Jewish tradition to give your matchmaker a “gift”, or success fee, for a successful match – so if our connections result in a serious relationship, we ask that you give a donation of any amount to Tribe 12 at that point. As a reference point, $1,200 represents the traditional (and symbolic!) amount a couple might donate to Tribe 12 for a successful match.

There is no catch! But there are plenty of things we like to be transparent about up front.

The main one is setting the expectation that this suggested-donation-service we provide is pretty hands-off, especially compared to what a matchmaking firm or dating coach, whose services range from 7K-50K, would offer. Instead of working with just a few people one-on-one, our matchmakers are working with hundreds of people at once. We do not guarantee matches - we simply offer the opportunity to be considered for matches. Our matchmaking program is constantly evolving and we are always working to improve our communication and offer as many opportunities to as many people as we can.

We also, of course, cannot guarantee success or that matches will be perfect fits.

I know, right?! In March 2023, we trained our first apprentices in Tribe 12’s methodology and were thrilled to bring some new matchmakers on board through that program. If you’re interested in being trained as a matchmaker in the future, email Danielle. Danielle also does consulting work for organizations who want to use matchmaking for community engagement in their own cities.

While our signature free (with a suggested one-time donation of $36) matchmaking intake calls remain our core service, we have had many people ask us for more hands-on matchmaking help. Browse our offerings here.

We also like to mention that one of our matchmakers, Michal Naisteter, is a date coach and matchmaker outside of her work with Tribe 12 and is happy to take on individual clients from our network. Michal generously gives a donation back to Tribe 12 for those referrals. Email Michal at michal@michalmatches.com to discuss your individual needs!

Well of course it is time to move here. Short of that, we do have a few people from other cities who are willing to commute in to Philadelphia for dates and events. If that is you, you are welcome to participate!

We are so proud to have helped other organizations, from New York to Boston to Sydney, start a similar Jewish matchmaking initiative in their communities. Fill out this form to be informed of our next training or email Danielle Selber to explore the possibilities.

Fill out the form at the bottom of this page! You'll get access to the individual calendars of our in-house matchmakers and can set up a time to chat with whoever’s schedule fits yours best. All our matchmakers work closely together so regardless of who you have your intake call with, you will be plugged in to all our offerings!