Follow Me Into the Gentle Dark - I Still Want You
The Full Story this illustration was made for can be found here: https://www.sofurry.com/view/1833113
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“Why? Why would you want this?” She softly cried. She looked down at herself, naked and exposed in the light before him. Every part of her bared for him to see for the first time. She felt so worthless just standing there, breasts barely big enough to fill the bras she wore, scar running under her navel, hairless between her legs. She found herself hoping he’d turn away, disgusted with her, and this would all be over.
But he only stepped closer and raised his hands to hold her face, fingers brushing the tears she’d not realized ran cold down her cheeks.
“Because this girl in front of me is everything I love about the world.” His voice quavered, and she saw his own tears now rolling down the sides of his face. “You’ve never looked more beautiful than tonight, because I can still see every bit of what I love. Every part of your body that makes me want to kiss you…just like the way you kissed me, months ago…”
Her breath hitched, remembering the first kiss they’d shared, almost forgotten with how long ago it felt. It had been a spontaneous thing, when they’d fallen over fighting in the snow, playfully grabbing and throwing each other through fits of laughter. She had ended up on top of him, the two breathing heavily, so close to each other. She’d looked into his eyes, and in that moment with their blood running hot and hearts pounding, she had kissed him. A deep, passionate kiss, shocking him into silence as their lips met. He had kissed her back. And for several long seconds they held each other in that embrace before separating, panting and out of breath. Their faces burned in the cold, and for several moments neither knew what to say. First of Dusk had only managed to breathe out a whispered “wow”, before Nightsail had given a light laugh and pulled him up.
The two hadn’t spoken of it since that day. Maybe they might have done so had she not fallen ill so soon after, body weakening slowly over the weeks until she had collapsed on her way to class. Her diagnosis and her months of futile radiation therapy had stolen away any urgency to address it. Another thing it had taken from her.
‘And now he’s standing here.’ she thought. ‘Telling me everything I wanted to hear.’
“But I’m not who I was back then.” She sobbed, giving voice to her thoughts
“I still want you. I’ve never wanted anyone more in my life.” He whispered, as if he couldn’t bear to hear any more. “I can’t imagine a world with you gone.”
Tears fell freely and her eyes closed, blinking them away as she reached up to rub at her eyes. She hated crying in front of him. Sobs wracked her chest. She heaved in chilling breaths as she leaned into him. He pulled her close and placed her head on his shoulder, shivering in the freezing night air. She felt the warmth of his body, and he basked in hers.
When she felt the sobs dying off she looked up at him. He gazed into her, and she saw the longing in his eyes. There was nothing but desire for her. No anger. No disgust. Just her, there in his eyes.
This time he took the lead.
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“Why? Why would you want this?” She softly cried. She looked down at herself, naked and exposed in the light before him. Every part of her bared for him to see for the first time. She felt so worthless just standing there, breasts barely big enough to fill the bras she wore, scar running under her navel, hairless between her legs. She found herself hoping he’d turn away, disgusted with her, and this would all be over.
But he only stepped closer and raised his hands to hold her face, fingers brushing the tears she’d not realized ran cold down her cheeks.
“Because this girl in front of me is everything I love about the world.” His voice quavered, and she saw his own tears now rolling down the sides of his face. “You’ve never looked more beautiful than tonight, because I can still see every bit of what I love. Every part of your body that makes me want to kiss you…just like the way you kissed me, months ago…”
Her breath hitched, remembering the first kiss they’d shared, almost forgotten with how long ago it felt. It had been a spontaneous thing, when they’d fallen over fighting in the snow, playfully grabbing and throwing each other through fits of laughter. She had ended up on top of him, the two breathing heavily, so close to each other. She’d looked into his eyes, and in that moment with their blood running hot and hearts pounding, she had kissed him. A deep, passionate kiss, shocking him into silence as their lips met. He had kissed her back. And for several long seconds they held each other in that embrace before separating, panting and out of breath. Their faces burned in the cold, and for several moments neither knew what to say. First of Dusk had only managed to breathe out a whispered “wow”, before Nightsail had given a light laugh and pulled him up.
The two hadn’t spoken of it since that day. Maybe they might have done so had she not fallen ill so soon after, body weakening slowly over the weeks until she had collapsed on her way to class. Her diagnosis and her months of futile radiation therapy had stolen away any urgency to address it. Another thing it had taken from her.
‘And now he’s standing here.’ she thought. ‘Telling me everything I wanted to hear.’
“But I’m not who I was back then.” She sobbed, giving voice to her thoughts
“I still want you. I’ve never wanted anyone more in my life.” He whispered, as if he couldn’t bear to hear any more. “I can’t imagine a world with you gone.”
Tears fell freely and her eyes closed, blinking them away as she reached up to rub at her eyes. She hated crying in front of him. Sobs wracked her chest. She heaved in chilling breaths as she leaned into him. He pulled her close and placed her head on his shoulder, shivering in the freezing night air. She felt the warmth of his body, and he basked in hers.
When she felt the sobs dying off she looked up at him. He gazed into her, and she saw the longing in his eyes. There was nothing but desire for her. No anger. No disgust. Just her, there in his eyes.
This time he took the lead.
3 years ago
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