A young woman passed away last weekend unexpectedly while having a wonderful day with her family on a nearby lake. I saw her photo in the paper and one of her family members was quoted as saying “We lost our little angel…God took her home at a early age and we will miss her dearly.” I have thought of that family often in these days, have layed in bed thinking of that young lady and her loved ones. In an accident that took a split second, a father lost his daughter and a brother lost his sister, so many lives were changed forever. I thought of their birthdays, weddings, vacations, everything that will come in that family’s lives and how they will be missing her. It’s often said “they are with us in spirit” and I relate to that but it does not make any of the pain go away. Today I sat to look ahead at summer plans with our family and something I have tried not to dwell on is there, staring at me and not letting me evade it any longer. This is the first summer we will visit family and a very special aunt will not be there. Thankfully she lived a long and blessed life but I had thought she would be with us much longer. When my father-in-law wrote me a card after her passing he said that she left some big foot prints. Some people are one of a kind. A while after she was gone someone in the family decided to give me a pair of earrings that I gave to her years ago while we were on a wonderful trip together. (A trip I almost did not take because of the expense, thankfully I went.) She loved those earrings and I don’t think I’m saying that because I gave them to her. They matched her favorite colors well and she wore them often. My heart is conflicted when I look of the earrings now. As we fret over our busy schedules, our full plates and overflowing in boxes, life is going by one day and one month and one year at a time. This aunt did not let life pass by, she picked up the phone, wrote the email, sent the card, made the plans. Plus she did this type of thing with all of her loved ones including dear friends, children of dear friends, long time colleagues, all people she cared for…and there were many of them. Her level of caring was remarkable and don’t get me started on her sharp and clever personality. I only wished I had known her my whole life, she was my aunt by marriage and not for long enough. Part of me doesn’t want to do any of the things we used to do with her because none of it will be the same without her. But life is not about digging your heels in the ground, it’s about acceptance. They say the deceased would want us to celebrate their lives instead of being sad when they leave. Of course she would want us to go to the beach, play at the lake, gather for dinner at sunset. Even if we are missing her silly faces, her perfectly dry sarcasm and how much she cared. I will miss her so much this summer. Last summer as I said good bye she said “Now that you’re leaving I don’t know what I’ll do with myself.” Then she said with a straight face, “I can’t go to lunch with anyone, all of my friends are dead.” I laughed at her and continued to laugh all the way to my gate at the airport. Life is for living, loving, laughing. Thankfully we have this day to live it, to write that note, make that call, smell the rain, watch the clouds, love, laugh. -smilingbug