Fabulous cards from: dagger_garnet (plus a very thoughtful B&N giftcard), bellybalt, thesecondcircle (dude, I don't even usually do the squeeing over kids thing, but your daughter seriously is the most adorable child in all of ever), nalathilion, carmelonia, wanderlustlover, _siddal_, thebratqueen, eiluned, faerishimmer (plus a neat beaded keychain), and alivemagdolene (which is probably the prettiest card I've ever gotten-- absolutely gorgeous hand-drawn Goddess art).

And the loot! Oh my god, the loot.

( Unabashed materialism beneath this cut!Collapse )

The most unique gift was an elephant hair bracelet from an honest-to-goodness shaman. It's for strength and patience, he said. Because gods below, am I gonna need those things in the coming months.

Really? I made out like a frikkin' bandit, and most of it was absolutely, completely unexpected. Picked out with such care-- I really saw the thought in each card and gift, and it was so warmly appreciated.

Thank you thank you thank you. I have enough books and cool stuff to listen to and things to bathe with and decadent chocolates to sample until I am approximately 72 years old.

EEEEE. Anyway, I hope the packages and cards (44!) that I sent made it into the hands of their intended recipients, and that their contents were well enjoyed. I did my best to pick out things that you'd like. And if I didn't get around to the presents (mostly net friends) and you're on the January list (aka, the "when my wallet recovers" list), you'll have something special coming your way sooner rather than later. I spent $55 in postage alone this month. Can you believe that?

And now, to the shower with me. And a heated blanket. Because I am le cold.

This time tomorrow, I will have different hair. Pink, quite possibly. Looking forward to it!

I ended up having myself a Merry Little Christmas after all. It started off pretty rough to be honest, and I fully expected to spend my day moping at family functions. This weekend was incredibly tough-- I did cry through most of it. Yay holiday spirit, right?

But in the end, I've got this:

-- My friends love me. Even when I don't call them back because I'm being too emo to live, my friends still love me.

-- My family might be comprised of total caricatures, but they're getting better with age. Growing up sucked the big one, but adulthood is generally pretty okay.

-- Things are craptastic with Skyler right now. As soon as he calls me back with a password for the router he set up in my house, we're going to commence with the giving each other space and a wide berth for awhile. Considering how quickly everything went down, and how we were in each others' social spaces all weekend long, things were tense and emotionally exhausting, to put it mildly. There was no public nastiness, just tension, but that really can't be helped. The plan is to get together to talk at some nebulous time after New Year's to figure out what kind of interaction, if any, we want from one another. Until then, things will be okay, I guess. Just vaguely uncomfortable. I know that space is the best possible thing if we're going to retain anything positive from our relationship, but for right now, I hate not knowing what to say when people ask me what's up. Do I say that we broke up? Because if the plan is to talk it over later, I don't know that that's necessarily accurate. I guess I say we're taking a break. We need to really work on rebuilding trust on both sides if we do plan to see each other in the future, and that kind of thing just doesn't materialize overnight. We do care about one another, there's no question about that. It just may be that a relationship isn't what's best for us. Time will tell.

-- Still, his friends and family are fan-fucking-tastic for being awesome to me regardless of our drama and status, and respectful of the situation in general.

-- Little things matter.

--Orphan Christmases are the best. Jon didn't go home for the holidays this year because of work, so we ended up watching Firefly and drinking Frontier Red with my roommate's boyfriend, Jayson, which is infinitely preferable to moping at family gatherings. I don't feel too bad about not having the holiday spirit this year. I got the friendship spirit instead, and that's worth more, I think.


I'm going to do a completely crass loot post later. I've been waiting to do it so it's all in one place and I can have a big, unadulterated moment of omgsqueeyay. Because I did get some shinies this year.

17flyingfish and aggiebell, I still have gifts for you! Let me know when you want them!

Also, I still have no concrete plans for New Year's Eve. I plan to be at a hot tub party the night of the 30th into the afternoon of the 31st, but as for the evening itself, I'll be free. Anybody want a kiss at midnight? Tell me your plans!

I'm pretty sure that if you're viewing my journal without being on my filters, my life has been the most boring ever as of late. Well. Maybe, but there's a lot going on. Not all of it I feel prepared to talk about or even really want to talk about, so there you go. It seems very much to be another transition time, another boundary-setting time. A time for me to define what I want in my life, and what I don't. Relationships are complicated, work is busy as I prepare to take on lots of new daily tasks and travel for most of next month, etcetera and so forth. It's a lot right now. So if you've emailed me or messaged me and I haven't gotten back with you-- it's not you. It's me kind of being underwater at the moment. I always make a note to myself to go back an answer that message or return that call, but then I get home and am exhausted and vegetative, and I can't think of what to say. So.

I did finish all of my cards last night. Finally. All of my packages are sitting next to my desk, and will be going out just as soon as Sara gets back from lunch and we make a post office run. I can't believe it's only 12:30-- today is going by so slowly. You know, I really like doing the card and gift thing. Gift-giving holidays are always kind of a strain on me because I have such a large family, and families come first. Even so, if the cash is kind of scarce, I like to do something small but thoughtful for close friends. And I managed that this year, so I'm pretty content. Still, I feel a little guilty, because it seems like I always receive more than I give, and that makes me uncomfortable. I mean, I spent down to the last $20 in my wallet for gifts with my last paycheck, and I always feel terrible when I can't repay a kindness someone has paid me. I think I'm going to make a baking list and send random cookies when I get back from my business trip.

But it doesn't feel like Christmas to me. I don't know what it is. Lack of carols, maybe. Lack of anything remotely resembling cold weather. Not living at home with my parents and therefore not being subjected to Rudolph or Frosty. Hell, I don't even know what my plans are for Christmas day are, anymore. I've been invited to some parties, but complications will likely keep me from going. Everything still feels so day-to-day; the holiday spirit didn't really set in this year. And I don't mean to seem like a grinch. I'm not cranky or upset or any of those things. I'm just numb, maybe.

Brr. I don't know why it seems colder in this building than it does outside.

I have a real fetish for good bagpipe music. I know, it's weird. I've been meaning to buy the most recent Rogues album, but I guess that will wait until after Giftmas.

Which, by the way, the first set of gifts I have ordered for have arrived. I can't mention any companies, because that would give away what the gifts are for those who will receive in December, but two packages have arrived, and two more should arrive in the next few days. That leaves me with only a few people to buy for: my fathers, my brothers, etc. Guy-type people who are always harder to buy for. I need to make a trip to the craft store for inexpensive giftwrap, though.

Considering the money crunch of December, internet-friends (especially international internet friends) will likely receive a card, and you'll get a belated January gift instead. I'll be traveling, so you'll probably get more interesting stuff, anyway.

I had a fabulous bath yesterday. I read and sipped jasmine tea in a Tabacon Springs bath from Fantasy Bath. The scent reminded me more a mineral-based, spa-version of their Bliss bomb, and the water was a bright blue. Very refreshing. I soaked for about an hour, scrubbing my skin absolutely smooth and using Lush Ocean Salt as a mask. (Related squee-- there's a Lush in the Orlando airport. This is exciting, as I will be flying into OA right as I run out of a few of my favorite products.) Anyway, I got out feeling like a million bucks.

I also worked on cards, and also on a gift for one of my friends. Part of it is a photomanipulation that amused me far, far too much for how simple it is.

Tonight shall be occupied hanging out with Ariel-- making flowering tea and attempting Asian cuisine. Fabulous.

Eep. I just spent almost $200 in one hour. On the plus side, all of the women on my Giftmas shopping list are covered. Mother, sister, close IRL friends, Dixie, Sara the cool co-worker. Close internet friends can probably expect a random January gift instead of a December one, as I'm doing my best to pace myself financially as not to incur any Giftmas debt. ( Giftmas note to self.Collapse )

I spent my morning detoxing from yesterday and last night. Jon and I did a wine tasting, then popped open a bottle of Flowers pinot noir over dinner. He cooked some incredibly fancy (well, for me, anyway) chicken pasta dish with lemon zest and a butter cream sauce, with a brie cake on the side. God bless the fact that I know men who can cook. I may make a mean breakfast-in-bed, but that's as far as my culinary skillz go. Yancy, Skyler, Jon-- you are all credits to your species and will make some woman fantastically happy someday. Anyway, we went to see my co-worker's band, Feinwood, play in the city, and they were fantastic, as always. I packed away two more margaritas, and we opened a 20 year-old bottle of tawny port when we got in to cap off the evening. A highlight of the evening was definitely Jon going through my Myspace pictures and personally captioning each one. Also, I made him update his Facebook picture, because the one he had was just bad, and our status is now "we hooked up, but not really-- I was just her beard" because I informed him that I might need a man-buffer in dealing with one slightly overzealous suitor. He did his job admirably-- remarking nonchalantly when guaged-up that we'd known each other for so long, he's hard pressed to think of when we met... it feels like he's always known me. Which is complete and utter crap, but delivered with such a straight face that I almost burst keeping the giggling in.

But when I woke up this morning-- man, was I feelin' rough. I think it's that I don't drink very often, but when I do, man, I can pack it away. So I soaked in the tub and let everything settle before attempting toast. I feel better now, but I was pretty pathetic for awhile. I slept most of the day away on the couch. But sickness aside, it was a lovely night with lovely company, and much fun and snuggling of kitties was had. Agnes, I gave Bucky and Ramses some love for you.

Jon, I left the Gewurtstraminer and the Frontier Red in the backseat of your car. I'm gonna have to get them sometime soon!

I did not get to Annapolis to see Rac. Fnergh. PS, Rac-- I need your mailing address for sending you Giftmas stuff.

Now-- to put clothes on and work on my Giftmas cards.

PS-- even if you have a Hugh Jackman or a Scarlett Johanssen fetish (as I sometimes do), stay far, far away from Scoop. Trust me, I'm right about this one.

Gentle Readers, here are the small, humble things that I request this Giftmas.

-- Jensen Ackles, in a leather jacket. Brooding. On my sofa.
-- Sarah Shahi in thigh-highs and garters at my disposal for a 12-hour period.
-- A get out of work free card good for any five Mondays I choose.
-- New kidneys, so I can overcaffeinate myself to my heart's content.
-- A group date with the Mediaeval Baebes at an amusement park.
-- A trip to the memory-erasing doctor in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
-- The ability to deliver a believable Irish accent.
-- Jake Gyllenhaal to wash my dishes and occasionally mow lawn. Even though I don't have a lawn.
-- Any partner, really, who will look at me just the way that Darcy is looking at Lizzy.
-- An 'undo' button for life, for all those times where I don't think before I speak.
-- Lapdances.
-- Screw magical breast-inhancing pills. I want a magical breast-reducing pill. A B-cup would be cute.
-- A personal hairstylist at my beck and call. I have the makeup-fu. I do not have the hair-fu.
-- Neil Gaiman's phone number. I get the feeling he'd be fun to prank call.
-- A magical ass and thigh area that looks fabulous in any pair of jeans I try on.
-- For a house to fall on my sister. Just kidding! (I think.)
-- A lifetime supply of pumpkin ice cream.

In lieu of these humble offerings, I will accept pretty cards celebrating whatever Winter holiday you so choose.

Now get on it.

:)

Last night, my Giftmas shopping got so much easier as I walked the aisles of the Mount Washington Whole Foods market. Frolicked down the aisles, I should say.

They have Numi flowering tea. They have Dagoba chocolate, Chocolove chocolate, Green & Black's chocolate, Schafen-Berger chocolate. They have the best in local handmade soaps. They have high quality cruelty-free cosmetics-- Larenim, Alba, Burt's Bees. They have herbal shampoos and cleansers and henna tints. Organic sugar cane exfoliators. Vegetable plant hair dyes. They have Pacifica candles and soap. They have the best hot cocoas and candy bark and gorgeous little handmade cards.

If maewitch were there with me, she would have fainted in a moment of pure ecstatic pleasure.

And there's a chic little wine shop right next door.

It's practically one-stop shopping, and cheap, to boot. I can buy almost all of my Giftmas presents this year at Ikea or Whole Foods. Whew.

Reason three million and twenty-three why this job is better than my last job: someone brought in homemade pumpkin pie that is absolutely to die for. It's all super-nutmeggy and positively orgasmalicious.

Long weekend. Was sick like a sick thing. Every moment not spent helping Skyler pack and haul boxes or put together Ikea furniture was spent passed out like the dead. He is now moved to Mount Washington, and indeed, his apartment is pretty nice. I especially like the walk-in closet that leads to the master bathroom. It's like going to Narnia, only not as exciting.

Am now obsessing about how I'm going to work my finances to be able to eek out Giftmas. I figure I've got about a $450 budget, which would seem sizeable were it not for the fact that both of my biological families are huge, and I have friends and extended family on top of it. I'm going to be baking a lot of cookies, I can tell. Just to save on money and sanity, I think that I might put together little mini-baskets for my female friends. A bath bomb and a candle, or something. Small and nice, but not huge with the costly. Just covering the family is going to suck this year. Immediate family alone, I have fifteen gifts to buy. It's so stressing.

So, I might do holiday cards. I might not. I'm undecided. I guess I should decide real soon, though.

Stress. Can't I just skip to the part where I'm fabulously wealthy?