Woe It Is or Is It Woe?

Oh, how I have neglected this journal! Shall the blame, which cannot be put upon me, be the fault of dystopian fiction and cycling fanaticism? I know not, but there is not enough quality of either because I again crave fanfiction as if the fanficcer has risen from the coffin which must mean she is vampric, draining the logic of my brains for breakfast.