[KPOP RPS] Multi chap: Baby, this ain't nothing but a thing - Chapter nine {super junior}
Title: Baby, this ain't nothing but a thing - Chapter nine
Rating: R
Pairing: Mainly: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Yesung/Ryeowook and Henry/Kibum. With various others.
Warnings: Sexual situations, sexual innuendo, voyeurism, bad language and some violence.
Word count: This chapter = 3, 671
Summary: Team White and Team Black have been pitting themselves against each other for years. They've become too wrapped up in this Spy vs Spy game, too wrapped up in thir own dispute to see the bigger picture. Enter the shadowy Team Grey who have their own agenda and their own way of getting things done.
A/N: In which Super Junior are all Spies and they kind of fail at it. Spy vs Spy AU.
Character profiles Who is in what team | Chapter one | Chapter two | Chapter three | Chapter four | Chapter five | Chapter six | Chapter seven | Chapter eight
Chapter nine
Zhou Mi took Kyuhyun home to his house, to Kyuhyun’s little nest of an apartment and not back to Zhou Mi’s--palatial by comparison--place. Even though Zhou Mi had been very, very tempted.
What he wanted to do, what he really wanted to do, what he should do is get Kyuhyun some medical attention. Lady Gaga only knew what the heck was in that concoction that Team Grey had given Kyuhyun. Team Black had their own medical team…or at least they had a guy that would treat bullet wounds without asking too many questions. Zhou Mi didn’t trust the guy, though. He smiled too much…and he looked a little like a frog. Zhou Mi had some Amphibian related trauma in his childhood.
But just how would Zhou Mi explain this to a proper, medical professional?
“You see Doctor, Sir. There were these evil spies…no wait, eviler spies. My team are the evil spies. So, there were these eviler spies and probably some plot to take over the world. I’m not really sure what’s going on.”
Yeah, that would go over really well.
Zhou Mi glanced down at the time on his cell phone and he sighed. It had been hours since he’d rescued Kyuhyun from Team Grey HQ--and left Kibum behind, oh god he was a dead man walking. It had been hours since he’d got Kyuhyun home and safe but still, Kyuhyun didn’t seem to be getting any better. Zhou Mi didn’t know what to do.
Actually, no, that was a lie. Zhou Mi did know what to do. What he should do, what he wanted to do. That surprisingly helpful member of Team Grey told him what he needed to do. But…but, could he do it? No, dammit. Damn his morals. Heechul did warn him that his morals would cause him problems, they would cause more problems than they would solve and here he was with a problem he couldn’t solve because it was wrong to take advantage of someone in such a state.
Dammit.
What would the rest of his team do in this situation? Zhou Mi thought to himself. Just what would Team Black do?
Heechul, Heechul would be ecstatic to have a member of Team White at his sexual mercy. Kyuhyun would probably be better off in the hands of Team Grey. Kangin would point and laugh and make jokes about penises that would be embarrassing for everyone involved. Kibum would…Kibum would…actually, Zhou Mi didn’t like to think about what Kibum would do. It’s likely that Kyuhyun wouldn’t be in one piece after. So, in retrospect Zhou Mi is kind of glad that he left Kibum behind. Han Geng, Han Geng would help. But only if he was sure that Heechul wouldn’t find out about the fact that he helped. Han Geng believed that the ends justified the means, kind of like Kibum did but with less violence. Only a little less violence though.
It would be all right as long as Kyuhyun felt better in the end. Right?
If Zhou Mi was honest with himself, and since honesty was mostly painful Zhou Mi was rarely honest with himself. If Zhou Mi was honest with himself he would say that he was scared of rejection. Just because he wanted into Kyuhyun’s tight, white pants didn’t mean that Kyuhyun wanted into his. Zhou Mi was afraid that when Kyuhyun came back to his senses he would be horrified at what had been done to him and mortified at who had done it.
Zhou Mi huffed out another sigh and slumped lower in his seat. Kyuhyun’s sofa was old and worn and it seemed intent on swallowing him whole, Zhou mi doubted he would ever be able to stand up again. Zhou Mi rubbed at his eyes, he was tired and all this thinking was giving him a headache and it was making his ears ring.
No wait, that was a phone. He looked down at the phone in his hand, nope, his phone wasn’t ringing. Zhou Mi looked around the small, cramped living area, the ringing sounded faint, far away, it was possible that the ringing phone was buried somewhere under all this stuff that Kyuhyun had piled up everywhere.
Or it was possible--and just Zhou Mi’s luck--that the phone was in Kyuhyun’s room, where Kyuhyun was. Yes, that’s exactly where it would be.
Dammit.
It took two attempts for Zhou Mi to extract himself from the sofa, he was glad that there was no one else around to see him straining to stand because that right there was undignified. It only took him a few strides to cross from the living room into the back area of the apartment. Soon, too soon, he was standing in the doorway to Kyuhyun’s room, looking in. Kyuhyun was sleeping and for that Zhou Mi was grateful. A fitful sleep was still sleep. Kyuhyun tossed and turned on the small bed, he moaned softly, so softly. That sound had a devastating effect on Zhou Mi’s libido. Little Zhou Mi was up and ready, ready to answer such an enticing distress call.
Big Zhou Mi’s will power was weakening.
The phone stopped ringing. Zhou Mi hadn’t even been sure if he was going to answer it. What would he say to someone who called Kyuhyun and got an evil spy instead? But maybe it could have been someone important, someone who could have helped. Zhou Mi started searching for the phone, he found nothing, but the ringing had definitely come from in here. Zhou Mi turned to look at Kyuhyun. Of course, of course the phone would be in Kyuhyun’s pants. Why was Zhou Mi’s life like this? Why hadn’t Team Grey searched through Kyuhyun’s pockets when they captured him?
Zhou Mi was convinced that someone somewhere hated him.
Gently, very, very, very, very gently Zhou Mi eased Kyuhyun’s phone from his pocket and looked at the display. He smiled softly, there was the answer to his problem. Someone he could call to get Kyuhyun some help. He turned to leave the room as quietly as possible.
“Zhou Mi?”
Zhou Mi froze. Kyuhyun’s voice was slurred and sleepy, he wasn’t quite awake yet. Maybe if Zhou Mi was really quiet then Kyuhyun would go back to sleep.
“Zhou Mi?”
Oh god. Kyuhyun’s voice was barely above a whisper but the need in it was deafening. Zhou Mi turned around reluctantly, he took small, hesitant steps towards Kyuhyun’s bed. Kyuhyun’s eyes were closed he was still so pale, too pale. Blindly Kyuhyun reached out, reached out for Zhou Mi. Zhou Mi caught Kyuhyun’s weakly flailing hand, he squeezed it gently.
“Kui Xian, I’m here.”
“I thought you left. I thought you left me.”
“No, I’m still here, Kui Xian.”
Yeah, Zhou Mi couldn’t have left even if he wanted to.
“Zhou Mi.” Kyuhyun said softly, his voice was almost pleading.
Oh. Oh.
“Zhou Mi, I don’t feel so good.” Kyuhyun groaned and curled in on himself. The grip he had on Zhou Mi’s hand tightened and Zhou Mi found himself pulled down. Kyuhyun seemed intent on pulling Zhou Mi’s hand down, down, down to…oh.
Oh. Oh.
“Shh, Kui Xian.” Zhou Mi said, he tried to keep his voice calm, like his hand wasn’t palming Kyuhyun’s crotch. “It’s ok, go back to sleep.”
Kyuhyun shook his head quickly, almost frantically as he said “No, no sleep. I need…” Kyuhyun grabbed hold of Zhou Mi’s arm and yanked him down further until Zhou Mi’s head was squashed against Kyuhyun’s chest. The dried marshmallow goo that was fused to Kyuhyun’s shirt was sticky, tacky, gross. Wow, it felt like a million years ago since Zhou Mi had watched as Kyuhyun was shot by Donghae’s ridiculously large marshmallow gun.
It felt like a lifetime ago.
Zhou Mi was now at eye level with Kyuhyun’s really pretty large erection. Who would have thought that Kyuhyun was packing that in his pants?
“Zhou Mi, Zhou Mi it hurts. What’s wrong with me?”
With his head pressed to Kyuhyun’s chest, Zhou Mi could hear the erratic rhythm of Kyuhyun’s heart. It sounded like a thunder storm. Zhou Mi couldn’t leave Kyuhyun like this any longer, he just couldn’t.
That Team Grey member--Sungmin--he said that the drug that was given to Kyuhyun would make him horny. And it was implied--heavily--that getting Kyuhyun off would make him feel better.
Right. Yes, right. Zhou Mi could do that. Yes, yes he could.
Oh god.
Kyuhyun was trembling now, shaking with need. Zhou Mi licked his lips to try and wet his suddenly dry mouth. He could do this, he could.
He felt dirty as he eased down Kyuhyun’s pants. He was almost painfully gentle as he lowered Kyuhyun’s boxers. Heart patterned, so cute! Kyuhyun moaned as the thin material rubbed against his hard cock. Zhou Mi swallowed again. He could do this, he could.
“Zhou Mi?” Kyuhyun called out to him, reached out for him. Kyuhyun’s eyes were still closed, he hadn’t opened them since Zhou Mi had come into the room, hadn’t looked at Zhou Mi. Kyuhyun knew that Zhou Mi was there, but did he know what was happening? What was happening to him?
It will be all right if Kyuhyun feels better after. When Kyuhyun feels better Zhou Mi might be able to forgive himself.
Kyuhyun whimpered again as Zhou Mi took hold of his cock. Zhou Mi held him delicately, like Kyuhyun was made of thin glass. Which was kind of silly as there was nothing thin or delicate about Kyuhyun’s erection. Already Kyuhyun was leaking pre-come, it probably wouldn’t take more than a few good strokes to get Kyuhyun to come and Kyuhyun probably wouldn’t break if Zhou Mi applied a little more pressure.
Zhou Mi started moving his hand up and down and Kyuhyun gasped. Zhou Mi moved slow at first and then harder, faster. Kyuhyun breathed out a sigh and it must have been Zhou Mi’s imagination that the sigh formed the word “Finally.”
Zhou Mi bit his lip until he tasted the bitterness of blood. This wouldn’t be so bad if Kyuhyun was the only one getting any pleasure out of this. Ok, Zhou Mi thought to himself, think unsexy thoughts. Kangin’s fart jokes, Heechul’s cats, Heechul and…Han Geng having sex. Ok, that really wasn’t helping. Zhou Mi bit his lip harder, he willed himself not to react to Kyuhyun’s soft moans and helpless little sighs. It was almost a relief for the both of them when Kyuhyun came.
Kyuhyun cried out and bucked his hips upwards. He opened his eyes, looked at Zhou Mi for the first time.
“Thank you.” Kyuhyun said softly, a tiny, exhausted smile played around the corner of his mouth. Then Kyuhyun closed his eyes, his breathing evened out and he eased into a deep sleep.
Zhou Mi felt at Kyuhyun’s pulse, Kyuhyun’s heart beat was solid, steady. A tinge of colour was edging its way back to Kyuhyun’s cheeks. Good. Good.
*
Zhou Mi cleaned Kyuhyun up. Kyuhyun’s sleep was so deep that he didn’t stir once as Zhou Mi took off Kyuhyun’s clothes, cleaned the come off his chest and stuffed him into a pair of pyjamas Zhou Mi found in a dresser draw. Zhou Mi threw Kyuhyun’s pants and underwear into the laundry and he threw the marshmallow stained shirt into the trash. That shirt was so done.
Zhou Mi watched Kyuhyun for a few minutes, watched him sleeping peacefully. He felt something in his chest tighten, Kyuhyun looked so young, innocent. Zhou Mi knew that looks could be deceiving, he knew that Kyuhyun was anything but innocent. He was young, yes, but not innocent. Zhou Mi knew that Kyuhyun was a very capable agent, except for the whole getting captured and needing rescuing thing, but that had been mainly Zhou Mi’s fault. Mostly. Totally.
Still, looking at Kyuhyun lying there on the too small bed, Zhou Mi was once again struck with the thought that they shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be in this line of work--whatever it was that they did. Neither of them should be doing it. Zhou Mi didn’t want to do it anymore.
Wait, where had that come from?
“I don’t want to do this anymore.” Zhou Mi said the words out loud. They sounded true, they tasted true. Oh. Oh crap. How was he going to explain this to Heechul?
Zhou Mi smiled a little sadly as he turned to leave the room. His heart felt heavy but at the same time he felt free, maybe he’d go work in a boutique. Yes, Zhou Mi thought he’d like that. But first he had a few things to take care of.
He took out Kyuhyun’s phone and thumbed trough the menu until he found the last missed call. He hit redial, the call was answered after only two rings.
“Kyuhyun-ah!” A frantic voice crackled over the receiver. “Where are you? Why haven’t you checked in?”
Zhou Mi didn’t answer for a few seconds, his words failed him. How exactly was he going to explain this?
“Kyuhyun-ah?” The person on the other end of the line sounded exasperated, angry. Worried.
“This isn’t Kyuhyun.” Zhou Mi said. Stupid thing to say really.
“What? Who are you? What have you done with Kyuhyun?”
I molested him. It might have saved his life but I’m still going to hell.
Zhou Mi didn’t say that though. It was what he was thinking, but he wasn’t going to tell this person that.
“Kyuhyun is all right.” Zhou Mi said eventually. “No, wait, he’s not. He needs your help. I’ve done all I can for him but I…” Zhou Mi faltered.
“Who are you?”
“No one important. Come to Kyuhyun’s apartment, he’s here.”
“What? Who are you?”
Zhou Mi hung up. He placed Kyuhyun’s phone carefully on a pile of magazines stacked up on a table.
“Goodbye Kui Xian.” Zhou Mi whispered, he knew that Kyuhyun couldn’t hear him.
Zhou Mi left. He had to get out of there quickly, before the person he called showed up.
||
Zhou Mi parked in the same place he had parked a few hours ago, about a block away from Team Grey HQ. The HQ itself looked just as deserted as it had before, but he knew that Team Grey was in there, he knew Kibum was in there. Zhou Mi didn’t relish the thought of going back into that maze, it was populated by axe wielding assassins and too pretty ninjas. But he couldn’t go back to his own HQ and tell Heechul that he was quitting and he’d lost one of Team Black’s best agents. Heechul would make him into a eunuch. Zhou Mi didn’t want to be a eunuch, he was very attached to his balls.
There were some conveniently placed bushes just outside the entrance to Team Grey HQ, just outside but also slightly out of the way of the main doors. Anyone coming out or even just looking out of the doors wouldn’t be able to see him. Zhou Mi took a minute to make sure that non of the bushes was actually Kibum--he wasn’t falling for that again. Then he settled down to watch. But what was he watching for? Was he waiting for Kibum to come out? If Kibum was able to get out of there on his own then Zhou Mi should have received an angry and strongly worded coded message by now.
Where the hell was Kibum?
“Boo!”
Zhou Mi didn’t shriek. He did not shriek. Zhou Mi never shrieked, he yelped. It may have been more of an ‘eep’, it was in no way a shriek. The voice that had spoken wasn’t loud, it was barely above a whisper, but the person had sneaked up on him so thoroughly that Zhou Mi hadn’t even heard any leaves rustle.
Zhou Mi jumped and whirled round. Sungmin was crouched low beside him, his hands resting on his knees, his butt sticking out slightly. He was standing in a comical rendition of the way that Zhou Mi surely had to have positioned himself as he observed Team Grey HQ. Zhou Mi tried to say something, his mouth worked but no sound came out. Sungmin just blinked at him, waiting. Zhou Mi still couldn’t sat anything.
“I saw your ass sticking out from these bushes as I walked by.” Sungmin said breezily. “You kind of fail.”
Zhou Mi just gaped at him.
“Are you going to engage in conversation or are you just going to make like a goldfish?”
“You really are an ninja!” Zhou Mi said after more minutes of gaping. Stupid thing to say, but Zhou Mi’s mind was blank. He was dead. He was so dead. He’d been caught unawares, caught with his metaphorical pants down and now this pretty ninja was going to beat him into a fashionable but very bloody pulp.
Zhou Mi gulped.
Sungmin just smiled a small, almost shy smile. He pushed passed Zhou Mi and peered out through a gap in the bushes.
“What are you looking at?” Sungmin asked. Sungmin had his back to Zhou Mi now, Zhou Mi could knock his out and be done with it. But--truthfully--Zhou Mi was too bewildered to move.
“Uhhh.” Zhou Mi stammered. Intelligent speech, Zhou Mi had mastered it.
Sungmin stood straight and turned to face him.
“Are you looking for your friend?”
‘Friend’. That’s a little too strong of a word, Zhou Mi thought.
“Yes,” Zhou Mi said carefully. “I’m looking for Treebum…I mean Kibum.”
Sungmin placed a finger to his chin in a gesture of thought.
“Ahhh, so naked guy was naked tree guy. I thought his penis looked familiar.
“You’ve seen him?” Zhou Mi asked incredulously.
“Yes. Naked. Twice.” Sungmin made a face. Yes, a naked Kibum wasn’t something Zhou Mi wanted to dwell on either. “I don’t think you want to find him.” Sungmin said. His voice was kind, like he was giving Zhou Mi some friendly, well meaning advice.
Still, Zhou Mi was pretty sure that he did want to find Kibum…he thought.
“No, I’m pretty sure I do want to find him…I think.”
Sungmin shook his head decisively. “No, no you don’t…wait! Shh, do you hear that?” Sungmin slapped his hand over Zhou Mi’s mouth, forcefully shushing him even though Zhou wasn’t actually the one making any noise. Sungmin dragged him down further into the bushes, they could just about still see out through the leaves. Sungmin pointed to where two men were emerging from the shadows of the entrance. The two men looked happy, relaxed and…they were holding hands.
“Sweet mother of Louis Vuitton.” Zhou Mi said, his words muffled by Sungmin’s palm.
One of the men was Kibum and he was happily holding hands with the Canadian. What in the heavens? Zhou Mi had clearly taken a wrong turn as some intersection and ended up in bizzaro world.
“They were totally boning in the middle of the corridor.” Sungmin said, he sounded disapproving. “I’m all for some happy fun time but there is a time and place for everything. And I’m pretty sure they couldn’t even blame it on the sex juice, neither of them had any contact with it…I don’t think.”
“Sex juice?”
“The stuff we gave Kyuhyun.” A look of guilt flashed fleetingly over Sungmin’s face. It was there and then it was gone. “How is he by the way?”
Anger swelled in Zhou Mi’s chest but he held it down, reined it in.
“He’s fine.” Zhou Mi said through clenched teeth.
“Oh!” Sungmin said happily. “So, did you…?” Sungmin waggled his eyebrows, he let the rest of his question hand in the air, unasked.
Zhou Mi scowled. “I took care of him.”
“Fine.” Sungmin pouted. “Don’t give me any details, see if I care.” Sungmin shrugged petulantly, then he stood, he brushed dirt from his knees. Well, I’ll be seeing you.” Sungmin said and he turned to go.
Wait, that was it? He was leaving.
“Wait? That’s it, you’re leaving?”
Sungmin turned back to face Zhou Mi, he shrugged again, a light quirk of the shoulders.
“I quit.” Sungmin said simply then he sighed heavily. “Yesung climbed aboard the fail boat and took a bath in his own serum, which resulted in him and Ryeowook getting it on.” Sungmin shuddered. “I’m pretty sure Ryeowook will want to continue on with his plans for world domination once he’s done getting laid but I don’t really want to wait around while he gets his rocks off.” Sungmin paused, he looked in the direction that Kibum and the Canadian had just skipped off in. “It looks like Henry’s defected. That just leaves Shindong and me. Oh. OH OH” Sungmin suddenly looked panicked. “Poor Shindong, he’s been forgotten about. I had better go check on him before I leave.”
Sungmin turned to leave again, Zhou Mi jut watched him. This whole situation was strange and somewhat anti climatic.
“Oh, there is just one more thing.” Sungmin said and he turned round again. Then he punched Zhou Mi in the jaw. Hard. “That’s for knocking me. Twice! I have a bruise. I‘m too pretty to bruise.” Sungmin pointed to a spot on his cheek but Zhou Mi couldn’t see anything but stars.
Damn, Sungmin had a hard fist.
“Well, ok bye.” Sungmin said, and then he was gone and Zhou Mi was left alone and completely confused.
Zhou Mi extracted himself from the bushes, brushed leaves off his shirt. What to do now? He should call Kibum, or text him, send him a coded message. He felt in his pocket for his phone, but he couldn’t find it.
“Oh, oh shit.” He kept patting at his pockets as if the action would magically make his phone appear. Sungmin must have taken it. Damn it.
Zhou Mi sighed, a long, long suffering sigh. Nothing left to do now but return to HQ and face the music.
Oh, oh joy.
.end of chapter nine.
Rating: R
Pairing: Mainly: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Yesung/Ryeowook and Henry/Kibum. With various others.
Warnings: Sexual situations, sexual innuendo, voyeurism, bad language and some violence.
Word count: This chapter = 3, 671
Summary: Team White and Team Black have been pitting themselves against each other for years. They've become too wrapped up in this Spy vs Spy game, too wrapped up in thir own dispute to see the bigger picture. Enter the shadowy Team Grey who have their own agenda and their own way of getting things done.
A/N: In which Super Junior are all Spies and they kind of fail at it. Spy vs Spy AU.
Chapter nine
Zhou Mi took Kyuhyun home to his house, to Kyuhyun’s little nest of an apartment and not back to Zhou Mi’s--palatial by comparison--place. Even though Zhou Mi had been very, very tempted.
What he wanted to do, what he really wanted to do, what he should do is get Kyuhyun some medical attention. Lady Gaga only knew what the heck was in that concoction that Team Grey had given Kyuhyun. Team Black had their own medical team…or at least they had a guy that would treat bullet wounds without asking too many questions. Zhou Mi didn’t trust the guy, though. He smiled too much…and he looked a little like a frog. Zhou Mi had some Amphibian related trauma in his childhood.
But just how would Zhou Mi explain this to a proper, medical professional?
“You see Doctor, Sir. There were these evil spies…no wait, eviler spies. My team are the evil spies. So, there were these eviler spies and probably some plot to take over the world. I’m not really sure what’s going on.”
Yeah, that would go over really well.
Zhou Mi glanced down at the time on his cell phone and he sighed. It had been hours since he’d rescued Kyuhyun from Team Grey HQ--and left Kibum behind, oh god he was a dead man walking. It had been hours since he’d got Kyuhyun home and safe but still, Kyuhyun didn’t seem to be getting any better. Zhou Mi didn’t know what to do.
Actually, no, that was a lie. Zhou Mi did know what to do. What he should do, what he wanted to do. That surprisingly helpful member of Team Grey told him what he needed to do. But…but, could he do it? No, dammit. Damn his morals. Heechul did warn him that his morals would cause him problems, they would cause more problems than they would solve and here he was with a problem he couldn’t solve because it was wrong to take advantage of someone in such a state.
Dammit.
What would the rest of his team do in this situation? Zhou Mi thought to himself. Just what would Team Black do?
Heechul, Heechul would be ecstatic to have a member of Team White at his sexual mercy. Kyuhyun would probably be better off in the hands of Team Grey. Kangin would point and laugh and make jokes about penises that would be embarrassing for everyone involved. Kibum would…Kibum would…actually, Zhou Mi didn’t like to think about what Kibum would do. It’s likely that Kyuhyun wouldn’t be in one piece after. So, in retrospect Zhou Mi is kind of glad that he left Kibum behind. Han Geng, Han Geng would help. But only if he was sure that Heechul wouldn’t find out about the fact that he helped. Han Geng believed that the ends justified the means, kind of like Kibum did but with less violence. Only a little less violence though.
It would be all right as long as Kyuhyun felt better in the end. Right?
If Zhou Mi was honest with himself, and since honesty was mostly painful Zhou Mi was rarely honest with himself. If Zhou Mi was honest with himself he would say that he was scared of rejection. Just because he wanted into Kyuhyun’s tight, white pants didn’t mean that Kyuhyun wanted into his. Zhou Mi was afraid that when Kyuhyun came back to his senses he would be horrified at what had been done to him and mortified at who had done it.
Zhou Mi huffed out another sigh and slumped lower in his seat. Kyuhyun’s sofa was old and worn and it seemed intent on swallowing him whole, Zhou mi doubted he would ever be able to stand up again. Zhou Mi rubbed at his eyes, he was tired and all this thinking was giving him a headache and it was making his ears ring.
No wait, that was a phone. He looked down at the phone in his hand, nope, his phone wasn’t ringing. Zhou Mi looked around the small, cramped living area, the ringing sounded faint, far away, it was possible that the ringing phone was buried somewhere under all this stuff that Kyuhyun had piled up everywhere.
Or it was possible--and just Zhou Mi’s luck--that the phone was in Kyuhyun’s room, where Kyuhyun was. Yes, that’s exactly where it would be.
Dammit.
It took two attempts for Zhou Mi to extract himself from the sofa, he was glad that there was no one else around to see him straining to stand because that right there was undignified. It only took him a few strides to cross from the living room into the back area of the apartment. Soon, too soon, he was standing in the doorway to Kyuhyun’s room, looking in. Kyuhyun was sleeping and for that Zhou Mi was grateful. A fitful sleep was still sleep. Kyuhyun tossed and turned on the small bed, he moaned softly, so softly. That sound had a devastating effect on Zhou Mi’s libido. Little Zhou Mi was up and ready, ready to answer such an enticing distress call.
Big Zhou Mi’s will power was weakening.
The phone stopped ringing. Zhou Mi hadn’t even been sure if he was going to answer it. What would he say to someone who called Kyuhyun and got an evil spy instead? But maybe it could have been someone important, someone who could have helped. Zhou Mi started searching for the phone, he found nothing, but the ringing had definitely come from in here. Zhou Mi turned to look at Kyuhyun. Of course, of course the phone would be in Kyuhyun’s pants. Why was Zhou Mi’s life like this? Why hadn’t Team Grey searched through Kyuhyun’s pockets when they captured him?
Zhou Mi was convinced that someone somewhere hated him.
Gently, very, very, very, very gently Zhou Mi eased Kyuhyun’s phone from his pocket and looked at the display. He smiled softly, there was the answer to his problem. Someone he could call to get Kyuhyun some help. He turned to leave the room as quietly as possible.
“Zhou Mi?”
Zhou Mi froze. Kyuhyun’s voice was slurred and sleepy, he wasn’t quite awake yet. Maybe if Zhou Mi was really quiet then Kyuhyun would go back to sleep.
“Zhou Mi?”
Oh god. Kyuhyun’s voice was barely above a whisper but the need in it was deafening. Zhou Mi turned around reluctantly, he took small, hesitant steps towards Kyuhyun’s bed. Kyuhyun’s eyes were closed he was still so pale, too pale. Blindly Kyuhyun reached out, reached out for Zhou Mi. Zhou Mi caught Kyuhyun’s weakly flailing hand, he squeezed it gently.
“Kui Xian, I’m here.”
“I thought you left. I thought you left me.”
“No, I’m still here, Kui Xian.”
Yeah, Zhou Mi couldn’t have left even if he wanted to.
“Zhou Mi.” Kyuhyun said softly, his voice was almost pleading.
Oh. Oh.
“Zhou Mi, I don’t feel so good.” Kyuhyun groaned and curled in on himself. The grip he had on Zhou Mi’s hand tightened and Zhou Mi found himself pulled down. Kyuhyun seemed intent on pulling Zhou Mi’s hand down, down, down to…oh.
Oh. Oh.
“Shh, Kui Xian.” Zhou Mi said, he tried to keep his voice calm, like his hand wasn’t palming Kyuhyun’s crotch. “It’s ok, go back to sleep.”
Kyuhyun shook his head quickly, almost frantically as he said “No, no sleep. I need…” Kyuhyun grabbed hold of Zhou Mi’s arm and yanked him down further until Zhou Mi’s head was squashed against Kyuhyun’s chest. The dried marshmallow goo that was fused to Kyuhyun’s shirt was sticky, tacky, gross. Wow, it felt like a million years ago since Zhou Mi had watched as Kyuhyun was shot by Donghae’s ridiculously large marshmallow gun.
It felt like a lifetime ago.
Zhou Mi was now at eye level with Kyuhyun’s really pretty large erection. Who would have thought that Kyuhyun was packing that in his pants?
“Zhou Mi, Zhou Mi it hurts. What’s wrong with me?”
With his head pressed to Kyuhyun’s chest, Zhou Mi could hear the erratic rhythm of Kyuhyun’s heart. It sounded like a thunder storm. Zhou Mi couldn’t leave Kyuhyun like this any longer, he just couldn’t.
That Team Grey member--Sungmin--he said that the drug that was given to Kyuhyun would make him horny. And it was implied--heavily--that getting Kyuhyun off would make him feel better.
Right. Yes, right. Zhou Mi could do that. Yes, yes he could.
Oh god.
Kyuhyun was trembling now, shaking with need. Zhou Mi licked his lips to try and wet his suddenly dry mouth. He could do this, he could.
He felt dirty as he eased down Kyuhyun’s pants. He was almost painfully gentle as he lowered Kyuhyun’s boxers. Heart patterned, so cute! Kyuhyun moaned as the thin material rubbed against his hard cock. Zhou Mi swallowed again. He could do this, he could.
“Zhou Mi?” Kyuhyun called out to him, reached out for him. Kyuhyun’s eyes were still closed, he hadn’t opened them since Zhou Mi had come into the room, hadn’t looked at Zhou Mi. Kyuhyun knew that Zhou Mi was there, but did he know what was happening? What was happening to him?
It will be all right if Kyuhyun feels better after. When Kyuhyun feels better Zhou Mi might be able to forgive himself.
Kyuhyun whimpered again as Zhou Mi took hold of his cock. Zhou Mi held him delicately, like Kyuhyun was made of thin glass. Which was kind of silly as there was nothing thin or delicate about Kyuhyun’s erection. Already Kyuhyun was leaking pre-come, it probably wouldn’t take more than a few good strokes to get Kyuhyun to come and Kyuhyun probably wouldn’t break if Zhou Mi applied a little more pressure.
Zhou Mi started moving his hand up and down and Kyuhyun gasped. Zhou Mi moved slow at first and then harder, faster. Kyuhyun breathed out a sigh and it must have been Zhou Mi’s imagination that the sigh formed the word “Finally.”
Zhou Mi bit his lip until he tasted the bitterness of blood. This wouldn’t be so bad if Kyuhyun was the only one getting any pleasure out of this. Ok, Zhou Mi thought to himself, think unsexy thoughts. Kangin’s fart jokes, Heechul’s cats, Heechul and…Han Geng having sex. Ok, that really wasn’t helping. Zhou Mi bit his lip harder, he willed himself not to react to Kyuhyun’s soft moans and helpless little sighs. It was almost a relief for the both of them when Kyuhyun came.
Kyuhyun cried out and bucked his hips upwards. He opened his eyes, looked at Zhou Mi for the first time.
“Thank you.” Kyuhyun said softly, a tiny, exhausted smile played around the corner of his mouth. Then Kyuhyun closed his eyes, his breathing evened out and he eased into a deep sleep.
Zhou Mi felt at Kyuhyun’s pulse, Kyuhyun’s heart beat was solid, steady. A tinge of colour was edging its way back to Kyuhyun’s cheeks. Good. Good.
*
Zhou Mi cleaned Kyuhyun up. Kyuhyun’s sleep was so deep that he didn’t stir once as Zhou Mi took off Kyuhyun’s clothes, cleaned the come off his chest and stuffed him into a pair of pyjamas Zhou Mi found in a dresser draw. Zhou Mi threw Kyuhyun’s pants and underwear into the laundry and he threw the marshmallow stained shirt into the trash. That shirt was so done.
Zhou Mi watched Kyuhyun for a few minutes, watched him sleeping peacefully. He felt something in his chest tighten, Kyuhyun looked so young, innocent. Zhou Mi knew that looks could be deceiving, he knew that Kyuhyun was anything but innocent. He was young, yes, but not innocent. Zhou Mi knew that Kyuhyun was a very capable agent, except for the whole getting captured and needing rescuing thing, but that had been mainly Zhou Mi’s fault. Mostly. Totally.
Still, looking at Kyuhyun lying there on the too small bed, Zhou Mi was once again struck with the thought that they shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be in this line of work--whatever it was that they did. Neither of them should be doing it. Zhou Mi didn’t want to do it anymore.
Wait, where had that come from?
“I don’t want to do this anymore.” Zhou Mi said the words out loud. They sounded true, they tasted true. Oh. Oh crap. How was he going to explain this to Heechul?
Zhou Mi smiled a little sadly as he turned to leave the room. His heart felt heavy but at the same time he felt free, maybe he’d go work in a boutique. Yes, Zhou Mi thought he’d like that. But first he had a few things to take care of.
He took out Kyuhyun’s phone and thumbed trough the menu until he found the last missed call. He hit redial, the call was answered after only two rings.
“Kyuhyun-ah!” A frantic voice crackled over the receiver. “Where are you? Why haven’t you checked in?”
Zhou Mi didn’t answer for a few seconds, his words failed him. How exactly was he going to explain this?
“Kyuhyun-ah?” The person on the other end of the line sounded exasperated, angry. Worried.
“This isn’t Kyuhyun.” Zhou Mi said. Stupid thing to say really.
“What? Who are you? What have you done with Kyuhyun?”
I molested him. It might have saved his life but I’m still going to hell.
Zhou Mi didn’t say that though. It was what he was thinking, but he wasn’t going to tell this person that.
“Kyuhyun is all right.” Zhou Mi said eventually. “No, wait, he’s not. He needs your help. I’ve done all I can for him but I…” Zhou Mi faltered.
“Who are you?”
“No one important. Come to Kyuhyun’s apartment, he’s here.”
“What? Who are you?”
Zhou Mi hung up. He placed Kyuhyun’s phone carefully on a pile of magazines stacked up on a table.
“Goodbye Kui Xian.” Zhou Mi whispered, he knew that Kyuhyun couldn’t hear him.
Zhou Mi left. He had to get out of there quickly, before the person he called showed up.
||
Zhou Mi parked in the same place he had parked a few hours ago, about a block away from Team Grey HQ. The HQ itself looked just as deserted as it had before, but he knew that Team Grey was in there, he knew Kibum was in there. Zhou Mi didn’t relish the thought of going back into that maze, it was populated by axe wielding assassins and too pretty ninjas. But he couldn’t go back to his own HQ and tell Heechul that he was quitting and he’d lost one of Team Black’s best agents. Heechul would make him into a eunuch. Zhou Mi didn’t want to be a eunuch, he was very attached to his balls.
There were some conveniently placed bushes just outside the entrance to Team Grey HQ, just outside but also slightly out of the way of the main doors. Anyone coming out or even just looking out of the doors wouldn’t be able to see him. Zhou Mi took a minute to make sure that non of the bushes was actually Kibum--he wasn’t falling for that again. Then he settled down to watch. But what was he watching for? Was he waiting for Kibum to come out? If Kibum was able to get out of there on his own then Zhou Mi should have received an angry and strongly worded coded message by now.
Where the hell was Kibum?
“Boo!”
Zhou Mi didn’t shriek. He did not shriek. Zhou Mi never shrieked, he yelped. It may have been more of an ‘eep’, it was in no way a shriek. The voice that had spoken wasn’t loud, it was barely above a whisper, but the person had sneaked up on him so thoroughly that Zhou Mi hadn’t even heard any leaves rustle.
Zhou Mi jumped and whirled round. Sungmin was crouched low beside him, his hands resting on his knees, his butt sticking out slightly. He was standing in a comical rendition of the way that Zhou Mi surely had to have positioned himself as he observed Team Grey HQ. Zhou Mi tried to say something, his mouth worked but no sound came out. Sungmin just blinked at him, waiting. Zhou Mi still couldn’t sat anything.
“I saw your ass sticking out from these bushes as I walked by.” Sungmin said breezily. “You kind of fail.”
Zhou Mi just gaped at him.
“Are you going to engage in conversation or are you just going to make like a goldfish?”
“You really are an ninja!” Zhou Mi said after more minutes of gaping. Stupid thing to say, but Zhou Mi’s mind was blank. He was dead. He was so dead. He’d been caught unawares, caught with his metaphorical pants down and now this pretty ninja was going to beat him into a fashionable but very bloody pulp.
Zhou Mi gulped.
Sungmin just smiled a small, almost shy smile. He pushed passed Zhou Mi and peered out through a gap in the bushes.
“What are you looking at?” Sungmin asked. Sungmin had his back to Zhou Mi now, Zhou Mi could knock his out and be done with it. But--truthfully--Zhou Mi was too bewildered to move.
“Uhhh.” Zhou Mi stammered. Intelligent speech, Zhou Mi had mastered it.
Sungmin stood straight and turned to face him.
“Are you looking for your friend?”
‘Friend’. That’s a little too strong of a word, Zhou Mi thought.
“Yes,” Zhou Mi said carefully. “I’m looking for Treebum…I mean Kibum.”
Sungmin placed a finger to his chin in a gesture of thought.
“Ahhh, so naked guy was naked tree guy. I thought his penis looked familiar.
“You’ve seen him?” Zhou Mi asked incredulously.
“Yes. Naked. Twice.” Sungmin made a face. Yes, a naked Kibum wasn’t something Zhou Mi wanted to dwell on either. “I don’t think you want to find him.” Sungmin said. His voice was kind, like he was giving Zhou Mi some friendly, well meaning advice.
Still, Zhou Mi was pretty sure that he did want to find Kibum…he thought.
“No, I’m pretty sure I do want to find him…I think.”
Sungmin shook his head decisively. “No, no you don’t…wait! Shh, do you hear that?” Sungmin slapped his hand over Zhou Mi’s mouth, forcefully shushing him even though Zhou wasn’t actually the one making any noise. Sungmin dragged him down further into the bushes, they could just about still see out through the leaves. Sungmin pointed to where two men were emerging from the shadows of the entrance. The two men looked happy, relaxed and…they were holding hands.
“Sweet mother of Louis Vuitton.” Zhou Mi said, his words muffled by Sungmin’s palm.
One of the men was Kibum and he was happily holding hands with the Canadian. What in the heavens? Zhou Mi had clearly taken a wrong turn as some intersection and ended up in bizzaro world.
“They were totally boning in the middle of the corridor.” Sungmin said, he sounded disapproving. “I’m all for some happy fun time but there is a time and place for everything. And I’m pretty sure they couldn’t even blame it on the sex juice, neither of them had any contact with it…I don’t think.”
“Sex juice?”
“The stuff we gave Kyuhyun.” A look of guilt flashed fleetingly over Sungmin’s face. It was there and then it was gone. “How is he by the way?”
Anger swelled in Zhou Mi’s chest but he held it down, reined it in.
“He’s fine.” Zhou Mi said through clenched teeth.
“Oh!” Sungmin said happily. “So, did you…?” Sungmin waggled his eyebrows, he let the rest of his question hand in the air, unasked.
Zhou Mi scowled. “I took care of him.”
“Fine.” Sungmin pouted. “Don’t give me any details, see if I care.” Sungmin shrugged petulantly, then he stood, he brushed dirt from his knees. Well, I’ll be seeing you.” Sungmin said and he turned to go.
Wait, that was it? He was leaving.
“Wait? That’s it, you’re leaving?”
Sungmin turned back to face Zhou Mi, he shrugged again, a light quirk of the shoulders.
“I quit.” Sungmin said simply then he sighed heavily. “Yesung climbed aboard the fail boat and took a bath in his own serum, which resulted in him and Ryeowook getting it on.” Sungmin shuddered. “I’m pretty sure Ryeowook will want to continue on with his plans for world domination once he’s done getting laid but I don’t really want to wait around while he gets his rocks off.” Sungmin paused, he looked in the direction that Kibum and the Canadian had just skipped off in. “It looks like Henry’s defected. That just leaves Shindong and me. Oh. OH OH” Sungmin suddenly looked panicked. “Poor Shindong, he’s been forgotten about. I had better go check on him before I leave.”
Sungmin turned to leave again, Zhou Mi jut watched him. This whole situation was strange and somewhat anti climatic.
“Oh, there is just one more thing.” Sungmin said and he turned round again. Then he punched Zhou Mi in the jaw. Hard. “That’s for knocking me. Twice! I have a bruise. I‘m too pretty to bruise.” Sungmin pointed to a spot on his cheek but Zhou Mi couldn’t see anything but stars.
Damn, Sungmin had a hard fist.
“Well, ok bye.” Sungmin said, and then he was gone and Zhou Mi was left alone and completely confused.
Zhou Mi extracted himself from the bushes, brushed leaves off his shirt. What to do now? He should call Kibum, or text him, send him a coded message. He felt in his pocket for his phone, but he couldn’t find it.
“Oh, oh shit.” He kept patting at his pockets as if the action would magically make his phone appear. Sungmin must have taken it. Damn it.
Zhou Mi sighed, a long, long suffering sigh. Nothing left to do now but return to HQ and face the music.
Oh, oh joy.
.end of chapter nine.