One could be forgiven for assuming a kingdom that drew in the lost and lonely was little more than an attractant for those needing to rid themselves of surplus children. While that was a role the kingdom served, what seemed to be unspoken was that the bulk of its interactions with other kingdoms was in trade.

Like any kingdom, there was much produce that was valued beyond their borders, yet even that paled in comparison to the main source of income.

Sarah often sat in on the trade discussions, especially when she’d been the face of the kingdom during consultations. She quickly learned that her meetings, while essential, were a tiny cog in a highly complex machine.

When two parties in the Underground fell out over that appalling breach of etiquette at a state dinner, all of their trade ceased as a matter of protocol. As it would now be unseemly for the parties to continue trading publicly, the Goblin Kingdom stepped in as a middleman, quietly allowing trade to continue, while taking a cut of the proceedings.

This was a reasonably easy process after a fresh falling out, but it grew increasingly complicated over time as the needs of the parties were altered beyond a simple exchange of goods. The kingdom came into its own as they negotiated deals, often through multiple layers of exchanges.

Sarah had almost expected the deals to be conducted via open outcry, but had been fascinated by the quiet efficiency of all involved and the impressive way they shared knowledge and expertise.

If you were dealing with a trade within an agriculture portfolio, it was easy enough as the team was familiar with the entire process. However, when the trade deals moved beyond singular remits was when the meetings excelled, as different portfolios determined the best exchange of ore or textiles.

It had taken a moment for Sarah to understand that this wasn’t a stock exchange of competing portfolios, but a brokerage where, regardless of the trade, the Goblin Kingdom always made a profit. While there was every opportunity to take advantage and demand a greater percentage, it was run as fairly as possible. This allowed the kingdom a steady income of both funds, and a hoard of trade secrets a dragon would covet.

It certainly put a different light on the boasting of an ambassador, when Sarah had been privy to discussions on a failing crop and their farmers' desperate need to pivot to an alternate crop. The Goblin Kingdom had arranged for the change in agriculture and suggested a different source of trade to fill the gap.

Looking back, Sarah was uncertain if the ambassador was aware his kingdom was in peril, nor that the Goblin Kingdom was ensuring it didn’t suffer from a failed harvest. It was possible the analogy of a swan could have been in effect, Sarah suspected that it was her kingdom that was paddling like mad below water to keep the Underground running with grace and efficiency.


labyfic — drabble #266: dragon
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah stood at the back of the room with a clear view of the stage and looked over the crowd. While she knew some of them had Underground connections, she wondered about the rest who had just shown up to an unannounced event.

She had seen the performance space when it was just a dark room lined with event posters, a small raised stage and suspect carpet. It looked more the part now that the house lights had been turned down and the stage was lit.

Jareth liked to test music he’d been working on with a live audience who were neither involved in its creation, deferential to his status nor as undiscerning as goblins. He didn’t have any problem wrangling a slot at a live music venue, but perhaps the location in a pub basement and the out of slate timing made things easier. Even so, the event still pulled a full house of just over a hundred people who were loudly enjoying Jareth’s set.

Sarah loved watching him perform, this time he was solo with an acoustic guitar for accompaniment. He seemed a lot freer than when he was acting as Goblin King. She loved the knack he had of seeming to be singing to each individual, but she knew him well enough to note that his performance persona was just another mask.

Several guardians were in attendance in addition to the security provided by the venue. Sarah caught Bishop’s eye and nodded as he walked the perimeter of the crowd. She’d seen him quietly eject a couple of people earlier who’d outstayed their welcome.

She was happily dancing with the crowd when she felt the unwelcome presence of a stranger sidling beside her, Sarah could see him lean in as if he was trying to speak to her. While he couldn’t be heard over Jareth and the crowd, she aimed a subtle audio isolation spell towards him before shutting it down with a shudder. Aside from a distinct lack of hygiene and a disrespect for personal space, he was trying to hit on her by mansplaining her husband’s music.

Shaking her head and stepping away from the man didn’t deter him and his lack of situational awareness meant that he was unaware that he had caught the attention of larger predators. It was best for the man’s longevity that Bishop intervened by grabbing his hips and grinding into his rear. Although Sarah suspected that the lesson of unwanted sexual contact was lost on the man, he did back away. With a broad grin, Bishop pulled the man aside and dragged him up the stairs.

Sarah hadn’t seen Rook since the house lights had dropped, but she suspected she was handing off idiots with Bishop. She did idly wonder if they were passed on to the bouncers or if they were further educated on the errors of their ways. She had little sympathy for them when they felt the urge to prey on people enjoying a night out.


labyfic — drabble #265: bait
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah tapped a pencil against her teeth as she read over her notes. She had a set of items that she’d been testing glazes on in an attempt to replicate an effect she’d seen at a recent expo. She was fairly certain it was just heavily layered glazes that bled into each other when fired, but until her work came out of the kiln, it was still guess work.

Bishop had picked up a masking fluid applicator that he was testing and Sarah was just as curious to see how his test pieces fired.

“The turquoise is pleasing.” Jareth tilted his head and admired a spreading blot of colour. “It shimmers between blue and green.” He held up the bottle to admire the swirl of colour. “There’s an interesting metallic sheen too.”

“I don’t disagree that it’s gorgeous, but it’s only going to work at a small scale.” Rook swiveled the paper around. “Add some more, let’s see how it layers.”

Sarah grinned as the pair made appreciative noises at the mess they were creating. She had no doubt that it would find its way into their art process in some manner.

Everyone who’d attended the expo had returned with something. Whether that was a haul of yarns, fabrics, patterns and tools, an astoundingly vast array of fox themed merchandise or just inspiration to try an existing technique in a different way.

For all the creativity that had followed them Underground, Sarah was certain that Jareth had expanded the horizons of many of those Above. She had assumed that he’d been handing out prize tokens to random children, but he had been carefully matching interests to artisans. This had resulted in further sales, but he insisted that those choices would ripple further. A girl who selected a bracelet, would go on to take up an interest in beading. The boy who was delighted at a pufferfish toy, would teach himself how to crochet.

Sarah just hoped these newly awakened hobbies could find a way to fund themselves or the children’s mothers may well end up cursing the devilishly handsome gentleman who had handed their offspring a prize token and enticed them into the future of a never ending demand for art and craft supplies.

“How do you reckon the layering will turn out?” Sarah asked Bishop as he doodled stylised lines that looked surprisingly organic.

“I think the browns are going to be disappointingly pale, but the blue and green will be interesting.” He nodded to Jareth’s ink experimentation. “If it fires well, a peacock blend has potential.”

Sarah nodded. “Yeah, I can see that being popular. I’d love to get the same with a red and orange, but,” she trailed off.

“Reds are tricky,” Bishop finished.

Yet again Sarah wished that glazes could be as clear cut as the pigments that Jareth worked with, but that would take the fun and anticipation out of working through her experiments. She would need to ask Thadie if she had any suggestions.


labyfic — drabble #264: gentleman
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah wasn’t certain who had first broached the idea of a field trip Above, but it had gained enough traction that the organisation became an adventure of its own. Everyone had been poring over the event maps and had devised their own battle plans of how best to maximise their visit to see as much as possible.

The event was an arts and crafts exposition that was large enough to not only cover an enormous amount of floor space, but also included a hugely diverse array of exhibitors. In the days leading up the trip, those interested in attending were paired with a guardian who shared an interest. It would eliminate the strain of Jareth wrangling and transporting everyone, and it would allow people to follow their own paths and return at their leisure.

Of course, no plan survives contact with the enemy. Sarah had hoped to spend some time with Jareth, but the ceramics section was opposite the direction he was heading, so she spent the day geeking out with Bishop. She loved seeing the different ways people used glazes and it was providing great inspiration for her own projects.

As they wandered the aisles of the huge event space they would occasionally cross paths with others in their party. The foxes may have had differing interests, but it seemed they had a shared love of fox themed miscellanea. Sarah smiled as she passed a tiny woman wearing an orange, faux fur combination hat and scarf with fox ears, her companion, a heavily glamoured wood elf, was chattering in excitement and brandishing bulging tote bags filled to overflowing with brightly coloured, glittery novelty yarns.

Sarah was a little envious that her own haul needed to be limited to samples and brochures. As much as she’d love to purchase all of the glazes, she did not want to lug their weight around for the rest of the day. She figured that if she still liked the sample when she got home, she could order the glaze directly.

While she only caught a glimpse of Jareth, she recognised his work by the gushing of several of the smaller artisan stall holders. It seemed that an attractive man dressed in a lavish red and gold frock coat, had purchased a significant amount of their goods with a caveat that they were to exchange these goods throughout the day for a token. When the children appeared with their prize tokens, their parents always ended up purchasing more items.

A small girl happily showed off the handmade unicorn bracelet she had won, while her sister bought a pair of dragon earrings.

Sarah loved seeing how Jareth’s random acts of kindness spread such joy. She knew that it would be a financial risk for a small artist to break even at a large event and was certain that Jareth’s actions had ensured they made a tidy profit for the day.

There was a sweetness to his decision to support other artists that warmed her heart.


labyfic — drabble #263: treasure
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was lost in thought as she walked the halls of the castle, so it took her a moment to realise that she was alone. It was always a subdued bustle as the morning staff prepared for the day’s meetings, so an empty hallway was unexpected.

Nothing seemed out of place aside from the lack of personnel and a door that had definitely not been there the last time she’d passed.

Frowning at the errant door, Sarah observed that it looked unlike any door she’d seen in the castle. It was beautifully carved in stylised art nouveau floral motifs around a name plate that indicated it was a games room. Sarah knew there was indeed a room that configured itself for gaming, but it didn’t have a door like this one.

Lifting a hand to trace the delicate patterns, Sarah realised that she had never seen another named door, but it was too late.

The moment she touched the door she was elsewhere and found herself curled into a ball. She couldn’t move from her cramped position and the little she could see of her surroundings was filtered through a translucent shell. It looked like a tavern in Goblin City, but the perspectives were off and she couldn’t work out why until a huge clawed hand grabbed her prison and rolled it across the table to collide with a set of wooden pillars.

She wasn’t harmed by the impact, but the rolling was making her queasy. She was rolled several more times, making her stomach revolt, but the magic that held her in position prevented her from being sick.

Just as she expected to be subjected to another roll, she stumbled back into a hallway that was no longer deserted. Jareth caught her and eased her down, handing her a bucket that she violently regurgitated her breakfast into, as he held her hair out of the way.

She gratefully accepted a glass of water from Bishop, rinsing her mouth before taking a long drink. Rook handed her a damp towel and she wiped her face as Jareth led her to sit on a nearby bench.

“There was a door,” Sarah gasped out, glaring at the now solid wall, as she haltingly described her experience.

“I think you were the ball in a round of skittles.” Wrapping an arm around Sarah’s shoulders, Jareth held her tightly. “That was the games room. We suspect that it’s a part of the Labyrinth that’s gone rogue. It gets everybody eventually, but fortunately, just the once and it’s never the same experience for anyone.”

“I got shunted to a pinball machine.” Rook shuddered.

“Ice hockey,” Bishop added.

“Test match cricket,” Jareth grumbled.

Sarah gasped in shock. “That’s awful.” She may not have understood the game itself, but she did know that a test match was played over days. “It seems that I got off lightly.”

“It was not a pleasant experience. You’re lucky that goblins don’t have a need to polish the ball before bowling.”


labyfic — drabble #262: enchanted
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah enjoyed the simple pleasure of the mug warming her hands as she sipped her hot chocolate. The fire crackled in the room behind her and, while she was toasty and warm, she snuggled happily into the comfort of the thick faux fur throw that was wrapped around her shoulders.

She looked through the vast picture windows at the expanse of the mountain lit to allow for night skiing. There were quite a few people taking advantage and as some of them were guardians, Sarah guessed that others were also longer stay guests as well as staff and locals. Throughout the day the slopes were crowded with tourists. In contrast, the evening runs, while limited the a single slope, were leisurely, provided you didn’t mind sharing the slopes with those guardians who preferred to negotiate the runs in wolf form.

Tucking her legs into her cocoon of blanket, Sarah smiled as she watched a wolf bound down the slope in the wake of another skier who snaked their way down the lit snow.

“They seem to be having fun.” Jareth joined her at the window as he towel dried his hair.

Sarah openly ogled a Goblin King who was half clad in a black silk that made his pale skin glow in the flickering light of the fireplace.

“It was a great idea to take a break instead of attending hat lady’s festivities.” The novelty of wondering about the structural integrity of her headwear did not negate the dullness of conversation.

Jareth had arranged for a chalet, which would have been overkill for two people, but they’d brought several of the guardians along with them. Sarah had been accompanying whichever guardian was on the morning’s grocery duty and had been amused to overhear people gossiping about who was occupying their chalet. So far she’d heard that it was a celebrity recovering from plastic surgery, a disgraced minor royal or an organised crime lord laying low to await a court date. It amused Jareth when she recounted the latest theories.

“The goblins seem to be enjoying the break too.” Sarah looked towards where Jareth indicated and could see the children’s slope had been taken over by small creatures who were eating the snow and burying each other in it. One had been packed into a snowball that was pushed from the top of the hill to collect or flatten several goblins on the way down. They crashed into a sled at the bottom and fought over who would be the next snowball core.

“It’s good that no one can see them. The men who groom the slopes have been blaming drunken tourists.”

“Close enough,” Jareth chuckled. He hung his towel around his neck and looked down at Sarah. “Are you planning to watch them all night?”

“I am cosy out here.”

“But then I will be all alone in that great big bed,” he pouted dramatically.

“We can’t have that.” Sarah held out a hand. “Take me to bed, your majesty.”


labyfic — drabble #261: husky
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was not at all surprised that the cakes from the farmers market had never surfaced. Jareth could be like a dragon hoarding gold when it came to guarding a stash of baked goods. She did, however, put a lot of thought into the logistics.

There was no way he could eat it all at once, so it had to be stored and, as this was freshly baked produce, it had a limited shelf life. She wondered if he hid them in a pocket dimension where time flowed differently or perhaps he was catering a secret cake of the month club.

Sarah carefully spread butter on the thickly sliced bread, followed by a honey from their recent farmers market haul that she was working her way through. As she bit into the bread, she groaned in delight at the flavour. Each of the different types she’d tried were all delicious in different ways.

Taking another bite, she thought about an oddity she’d seen when she’d recently ventured out into the city. A goblin bearing a precariously loaded basket on his head had passed her in the street. The basket wasn’t unusual, but the fact that he glided past while standing on a large disc was a little odd. Sarah had been momentarily startled, but nobody else seemed to find this a strange occurrence.

“Thinking deep thoughts, my love?” Jareth pressed a kiss to Sarah’s forehead as he passed, before taking a seat and reaching for a slice of bread.

Sarah shook her head and described what she’d seen earlier.

“I believe it’s a cleaning appliance of some sort.” Jareth waved his butter knife around in emphasis.

Frowning as she tried to parse the explanation, Sarah looked at her husband. “Do you mean a robot vacuum?”

Jareth nodded as he swallowed a mouthful of honeyed bread. “I believe so.” He reached for another slice. “The strange little things escape their domiciles and drop into the Underground occasionally. One of the guardians investigated and determined that it was a…” Jareth paused at the unfamiliar term. “...firmware glitch. The goblins seem to be fond of using the devices as a form of transportation, so I implemented a series of spellwork guardrails that banish them back Above once their power source expires.”

Sarah sighed, it was just the kind of goblin adaptation of technology that she had come to expect. She did wonder if the robot reported that it had fallen into another world and what its owner thought when they emptied it and found it unexpectedly full of street detritus and glitter. However, whether or not it was a warranty issue if someone’s appliance wandered off on otherworldly adventures was definitely not her concern, but she didn’t envy their customer service team.

Jareth had finished eating and was carefully licking honey residue from his fingers in a manner that completely derailed Sarah’s contemplation of errant robots. She had a sudden premonition that the start to their day was about to be unavoidably delayed.


labyfic — drabble #260: improvisation
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was fascinated by the mix of housing in the area. Half of the properties had been gentrified with the work swinging between pristine restorations and modern confections that looked as if they’d been designed by architects who didn’t seem to understand how houses worked. The properties that hadn’t yet fallen into the hands of developers were cheerfully decorated share housing, whose mostly student occupants were still sleeping off the previous night’s hangover. She just hoped that no one needed to use the upper balconies, as they all looked like death traps that were nominally attached to the buildings by spit and string.

“That’s an unusual design choice.” Sarah indicated the corner pub that featured exterior tiled walls.

“Made it easy to clean up the vomit.” Jareth grinned and Sarah wasn’t sure if he was joking. “When work finished at five and the bars closed at six.”

“Men are disgusting.” Sarah shuddered at the thought of working men desperately trying to get all of their drinking done in that hour before heading home to their unfortunate families and really hoped a lot were wished away to the bog.

Jareth’s excitement at the array of stalls set up in the school grounds provided a timely distraction. He loved a farmers market and she wasn’t entirely sure what to expect from one located in the inner city, but it seemed to follow the usual mix of businesses.

Sarah was happy to wander amongst the stalls and take in the sights and smells while Jareth bounced around like a toddler on a sugar high.

The Bavarian bratwurst stall smelled devine, and she discovered that momo were delicious Nepalese dumplings but the sugarcane juice was too sweet for her tastes. A group of Turkish ladies were making gozleme with rapid military precision and a Greek man with a souvlaki stall was proclaiming that the lamb was especially good today.

The mystery of what exactly vegan jerky was made from would have to wait for another day when she saw a stall closing early. It had little pots of different spreads that you could taste and she was planning to try them all in her next circuit.

A pleased Jareth appeared at her side. “Their jams and marmalades are incredible and their honeys are spectacular.”

“I missed out on taste testing them,” Sarah sighed, looking wistfully at the cheerful couple who were packing up their wares.

Jareth slung an arm around her shoulders and leaned in to whisper in her ear. “You can try them when we get home. I purchased all the stock they brought for the day. They seemed quite delighted about the arrangement.”

“Would that be the same reason the cake stall is closing early?”

“You’ve caught me, you clever thing.”

“Is there any chance of you sharing your bounty from that haul?” Sarah asked slyly.

“I may require some convincing.” Jareth’s purr dropped into a register that curled Sarah’s toes.

“I look forward to the challenge.”

“As do I, my love.”


labyfic — drabble #259: tasty
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah smiled broadly as Bishop walked through the door. He strode past her to hand a pastry box to Jareth and Rook before returning to drop into a chair at her side. “How was your trip Above?”

“It was just handling queries, nothing major.” Bishop shrugged, offering Sarah a paper bag.

“What is it?” She screwed her nose up at what looked like chocolate covered worms. Taking one out of the bag didn’t dissuade her from that assumption.

“Chocolate coated orange peel.” Bishop popped one in his mouth and chewed in evident delight.

“That does not sound appealing.” Sarah reluctantly took a piece and glared at it in suspicion before taking a tentative nibble, grinning as she tasted a sharp tang of orange balanced by dark chocolate. “It’s really good. What else have you got?”

“Chocolate ginger and salted liquorice, amongst other things.” He dropped a bag full of small, unmarked paper bags on the table.

Sarah eyed the bag as if she’d just been introduced to candy roulette. “I’ll take your word on the ginger and I like liquorice, but why would you salt it?”

“It’s a Dutch thing.” Bishop helped himself to another piece of chocolate peel. “If you like liquorice, it’s still something of an acquired taste. I suggest you start on the mild form and work your way up to the saltier types.”

Sarah wasn’t certain if Bishop was being serious and was about to ask when her train of thought was derailed by giggling. She turned to see Jareth with a pastry in one hand and a sheaf of brightly coloured paper in the other hand.

“Look at the gold.” Jareth snorted in amusement and passed the papers to Rook. “It’s all the same colour regardless of purity.”

Rook leaned over and pointed at something. “The stones are all a uniform colour, but why have they made the sapphires black?”

Jareth rifled through the papers and found what he was looking for. “They have aquamarine looking gems with a pretentious name that likely indicates they’re altered from their natural state that are using the blue overlay.”

“Well, obviously, two blue gems would just be confusing.” Rook and Jareth dissolved into laughter.

Sarah was certain she could hear the eye roll that Rook made. “What did you give them?” She asked Bishop in confusion.

“Marketing brochures for the jewellery chain stores that infest shopping malls.” Sarah nodded, recalling the junk mail that was unavoidable Above, but still not seeing the humor. “They’re entertained by the terrible print design.”

Sarah looked at her husband fondly as he playfully nudged Rook’s shoulder to point out another design gaffe with a laugh. “This is an artist thing, isn’t it?” Bishop nodded.

Sarah sighed, realising that while she loved Jareth to bits, he could be a total weirdo at times. Turning back to Bishop, she raised an eyebrow and grinned as she poked at the bag of candy. “You’ve thrown down the challenge, my friend, let’s try this salted liquorice.”


labyfic — drabble #258: ring
Part of the Balance!verse

It had taken Sarah a little while to recognise the patterns of wishes. She had initially assumed all wishes would be similar to her own and reacted accordingly whenever she felt the pull of the Labyrinth. She was quick to learn that this was often akin to walking into a fast food restaurant in a formal ball gown.

Jareth had been incredibly patient as he coached her through the differing calls. As a monarch, she felt them all, and had been surprised that not every wish required their presence.

When a child was wished away in a parent’s last hope to cure them, not only were the Goblin King or Queen present, but the appropriate Underground personnel were alerted. The goblin retrieval team took the ailing child directly to the prepared infirmary without remaining Above to cause mischief.

Other calls invoked just the goblins and their talents for chaos. Sarah would still feel them, but they lacked the urgency of child related calls. She would occasionally wonder if she should be more concerned, but eventually decided that if someone was silly enough to wish for the goblins to deal with an office printer, then they could deal with the inevitable relocation of toner from the inside of the machine to the outside.

There were regular calls from people afflicted by dementia who kept wishing to see a pet named Goblin. The goblins who attended didn’t seem to mind the pet food offering or grooming session that came with the job and were always delighted at returning Underground to show off their ribbon bedecked hair and freshly polished armour.

Sarah had felt a wish earlier in the day and parsed it as a request for the Goblin King. These were usually quick jaunts Above and she thought nothing of it until she missed Jareth at dinner. Not feeling anything amiss she retired to their rooms before summoning a crystal to investigate the delay.

Jareth was stretched out in the sleeping pod of a commercial aircraft. A small girl was curled into his chest, her hand fisted in the fur of the wolf that lay on his other side. A flight attendant opened the pod door and quietly placed refreshments on the tray table, smiling at Jareth as if he was the most doting father in the world. Sarah had to wonder what the Labyrinth was showing the attendant to explain why a child travelling alone was now accompanied by a Goblin King and a wolf, who were not on the passenger manifest.

Jareth may have been able to turn into an owl, but he was less than thrilled at being trapped in an aircraft. The Labyrinth had sent along Rook as an emotional support wolf to assist in the wish of a terrified child who had encountered turbulence while flying alone. The wish hadn’t been fulfilled until the plane had reached its destination and the child, now clutching a plush owl and wolf, disembarked into the arms of a waiting parent.


labyfic — drabble #257: pattern
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah awkwardly held a blossom, maneuvering it to give the fat bumblebee on her hand better access. While the insect was carefully inspecting her offering, she quickly sketched it. With a buzz of its wings, the bee departed, bonking into a fairy as it headed for another flower with complete disregard for the disgruntled creature who was threatening it in a shrill squeak.

The bees were much the same as their Above counterparts, but larger and they changed colours like chameleons.

She looked up from her sketch to see Jareth and Rook were still working away. Much like when they painted, there was a lot of silent communication as they made decisions on their work. They had clamped jigs to a table and were using them to wind short pieces of wood with the twisted wire they had earlier created.

Jareth had shown her a blank with a hole drilled through the length and explained that it would be wrapped with wire for a secure grip before being attached to the hilt of a knife or sword. Coils of twisted copper, bronze and silver wire were being used, sometimes in tandem to create pleasing bands of alternating colour.

There was a growing basket of completed handles on the table. Sarah knew they tended to work in batches and that some of the handles would be used for future projects, but it did seem like a large number of potential weapons. Having seen a few of their finished blades, Sarah wasn’t surprised they were sort after items in both worlds.

“Have the girls been settled yet?” Bishop asked as he set aside a sketch of an angry fairy.

“Yes, Charlie’s asthma was successfully treated.” Both children had also shown signs of malnutrition, thanks to the combination of low paying work and poor quality food being cheaper. It was a societal issue that the Labyrinth saw often.

“The girls asked to stay together and a suitable match was found with a quad of water sprites.” Sarah was pleased that the cousins would be raised as sisters. “They were unfazed at having four parents and were more interested in whether they’d be living on land or in the water.”

“A fair question,” Bishop chuckled. When everything in your new world was so different it was a steep learning curve. Even when those Above had some knowledge of Underground races, tales of water sprites occurred across many cultures with vastly differing descriptions.

“Hazy was more concerned about books swelling up in the damp than she was about the possibility of living underwater.”

“Nice to know she has her priorities right.” Bishop turned to a blank page in his sketch book and eyed off a fairy who was sitting astride a flower, threatening a bee with a clenched fist.

“It’s a good thing kids are resilient,” Sarah sighed. “Compared to the horrors many of them went through Above, unexpected living arrangements wouldn’t even rate a raised eyebrow if you showed them a safe living environment.”


labyfic — drabble #256: swollen
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was curled up in an armchair, quietly decompressing from a day of meetings. Her meandering thoughts were interrupted by Jareth entering the room. He was a vision dressed all in white and both her eyes and her thoughts went south as she wondered about the structural integrity of the very tight trousers he had seemingly had painted on.

Jareth grinned in delight at her perusal and took an exceedingly long time to carefully place each cushion on the floor, making sure to bend over each time to shamelessly flaunt his assets, before he draped himself across the pile.

“See something you like?”

Sarah tilted her head in open appraisal. “The work of an exceedingly talented tailor.”

“You wound me!” Jareth dramatically clutched his chest.

“If anything rent the fabric of those pants they’d explode off you like a stripper’s prop.” Sarah laughed at her husband’s theatrics and raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know that they’d survive your getting excited.”

“Is that a challenge?” Jareth’s eyes glittered in amusement.

“Perhaps. But first tell me how your project is fairing.”

They’d had a handful of adults from a small town who were wished away by unrelated children to deal with and Jareth had taken an interest in finding a solution. It seemed that two groups had ensconced themselves on the periphery of the town and were making life difficult for the community. Their members managed to tick multiple boxes for antisocial behaviour and, for all of their proclaimed desire to avoid others, they went out of their way to alienate their neighbours.

“They all have a fetish for weaponry, yet no comprehension of their proper use and storage.” Jareth shook his head in disgust. “They wave them around like toys and carry them like a child’s security blanket. Their encampments are riddled with holes from accidental discharges.”

“Are the goblins safe?” Sarah knew they’d been involved on the ground, but not the potential danger of the situation.

“They’ve been spell shielded. We’re dealing with highly paranoid people who are phobic of everything not like themselves and they walk around armed to the teeth. I wove a rebound into the spellwork.” Jareth’s grin was malevolent. “That’s taken care of several of the offenders.”

Sarah appreciated the elegance of the solution. Regardless of whether someone shot or swung a gardening tool at a goblin, the impact would instead injure the attacker. “What of the rest?”

“All it took was a little goblin shenanigans in moving things around and a trail of glitter.” Jareth chuckled darkly. “The two groups launched an armed assault against each other and the Above authorities finally took an interest in their behaviour.”

Sarah shuddered. She would have preferred a less lethal ending, but they had allowed a known child molester to prey on the local community and threatened them in a myriad of ways on a daily basis. “I don’t expect the township will mourn their demise.”

“Indeed.” Jareth stretched provocatively. “Now tell me more about these stripper trousers.”


labyfic — drabble #255: sparkle
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah had chosen the garden because it was graced with the afternoon sun. She was delighted to find sunlounges in a storage room off the conservatory and had wheeled one out to relax in the last of the day’s warmth.

Bishop had joined her and they were quietly discussing the merits of the books they were reading, when Jareth and Rook found them.

Rather than dragging out their own angular garden furniture, they relocated cushions to the lawn and settled into the mound of plushness on either side of an old gas station road map. Every so often a goblin would amble in to pass on information, which would be quietly discussed before the allocation of a new task. They would then gesticulate over the map and make notations, presumably based on what had been imparted.

“Did that goblin have a golf club?” Bishop asked.

“I think that was Niblick, so I suspect so,” Sarah replied as she looked up from her book. “There’s a group who have been hanging out watching televised golf with Dad.” Sarah smiled fondly at the thought. “I suspect he likes having someone to share his love of the sport. They’ve all renamed themselves based on a documentary they were watching, but I think they may be taking a different view of the game than Dad does.”

“I can’t picture anyone as small as a goblin using a full sized club for its intended purpose.”

“Not even Irene can,” Sarah chuckled. “Especially when they carry them as weapons at arms.”

“Do you have any idea why Jareth would be deploying club wielding goblins?”

“I think it’s related to those adults we got recently.” Jareth had responded to a boy who wished an adult away and did not want him returned. “The man had been hanging around a middle school and talking to children in a manner that was suspicious enough that a kid invoked the Goblin King.”

“So we’re the grey area when the authorities won’t deal with it,” Bishop snorted in disgust.

“The magic of the wish does give us more of a behavioural insight and he was definitely up to no good.” Sarah shuddered at the memory.

“What did you do with him?” Bishop asked.

“We don’t want him and, as his actions went as far as planning, hanging him head first in the bog was off the table.” Sarah would not have had a problem with that option. “Jareth adjusted time a little and bound him in servitude to a master outside the kingdom for a year, before returning him Above.”

“He learned his lesson?” Bishop asked in disbelief.

“I doubt it, but the authorities finally acted on his arrival.” It didn’t work in his favour that he was wandering naked on school grounds, had a criminal history and was loudly regaling all about his year long Underground adventure when he’d been seen the day prior.

“There was another incident?”

“Similar,” Sarah nodded towards Jareth and Rook. “They’re working on a solution.”


labyfic — drabble #254: angular
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was sitting on a stool, sipping from a mug of coffee as she watched Irene bustle about the kitchen. “Are you sure I can’t help?”

“You can give me an opinion on the walnut and cinnamon batch,” Irene waved Sarah’s suggestion aside and returned to layering crushed pistachios in buttered filo pastry.

Sarah made an almost indecent sound as she popped a piece of baklava into her mouth. “It’s so good. I can’t believe I sampled it before Jareth did.”

“You didn’t,” Irene laughed. “I swear, that husband of yours has a radar for when I’m baking. He popped in and waxed lyrical about my culinary skills just as the first batch was being sliced.”

“Of course he did,” Sarah rolled her eyes. “Have you taken up golf?”

“No, dear,” Irene looked over her shoulder. “Oh, the clubs in the umbrella holder. I asked the goblins to leave them there.”

“The goblins play golf?” Sarah lived with goblins and couldn’t see them having much interest in following the rules of any game when they erred towards chaos.

“There’s a group of them who’ve taken to watching golf with your father and he’s named them after the golf clubs they started carrying.” Irene shook her head in fond exasperation. “I suspect they use the clubs as weapons, but I’d prefer not to have that confirmed.” Irene shuddered before flashing Sarah a vicious grin. “Unless they were dealing with that awful man who orphaned those poor little girls you were telling me about.”

Sarah couldn’t disagree with the sentiment, but the man was too far removed from the wish for her to be able to act directly against him. While club wielding goblins would have undoubtedly adjusted his attitude, Jareth had worked within the limits of the compact to exact justice.

“As expected, his law enforcement contacts were more than happy to accept his false claim of victimhood in defending himself from a crazy ex and her sister.” Sarah snorted in disgust and recognised the rage in Irene’s eyes. “Before you castrate the man with a rusty spoon, he’s being dealt with.”

The man who’d murdered two women may have been able to use the deep seated misogyny of a broken justice system in his favour. However, when officers searched the homes of both victims and found evidence of the man having rampaged through in an orgy of destruction, his tale of innocence started to unravel.

The existence of the girls was usually wiped from Above, but there were exceptions. With ransacked homes and two missing children, the justice system swiftly swung in the other direction and used the women’s murders as a lever to force the man to reveal the whereabouts of the girls.

“He’s been charged with four counts of murder and is in prison on remand as a suspected child killer who’s refused to reveal the location of the bodies.”

“Such a shame,” Irene chuckled darkly. “I imagine the prisoner grapevine won’t be favourable.”

“I suspect you’re right.”


labyfic — drabble #253: chop
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah felt the pull of a wish and took a deep breath as the magic altered her clothing to something suitably menacing before it transported her Above. Jareth made a showier entrance, soaring in as an owl and transforming to stand at her side.

She took a brief moment to compartmentalise her work persona from her wife persona, because Jareth in his full Goblin King grandeur gave her the urge to climb him like a tree and the Goblin Kingdom monarchy coupling on a wisher’s bedroom rug did not make for the right first impression.

With her game face on, the residual transportation magic evaporated and Sarah felt like she’d walked into a swamp. The humidity was so heavy it was a physical weight. Her body’s reaction was to perspire in an effort to cool her down. A valiant effort that did little aside from make her feel as if she was melting. Jareth, of course, looked as fresh as a daisy.

As she was silently beseeching the weather gods for a thunderstorm and making a mental note to learn how to use her magic to, if not negate the humidity, at least make herself comfortable, the wisher flung herself at Jareth.

“Is Charlie okay?” The little girl wrapped around Jareth’s leg looked up at him with a tear streaked face. “Her puffer’s empty and she can’t breathe and I was so scared.”

The compact of the wish gave Sarah the details of the wisher to allow her to react appropriately, but sometimes deeper information wasn’t revealed until it was triggered by the wisher’s behaviour.

Hazel had been babysitting her younger cousin, but her aunt hadn’t returned home. She’d called her mother, who had told her to stay with Charlotte while she tracked down her sister. That had been twelve hours ago, Hazel had since been unable to contact her mother and the muggy weather had caused her cousin’s asthma attack.

The wish magic informed Sarah that the aunt had escaped a violent marriage and both children had been coached to not contact authorities in an emergency due to her uncle being in law enforcement. Unfortunately, the aunt’s night out had ended when her husband had stumbled over her and Hazel’s mother met a similar fate when she went looking for her sister.

Jareth picked Hazel up and pointed out the window. “Charlotte is there in my castle, beyond the Goblin City. She’s in the infirmary and her asthma is being treated.”

“Thank you, Mr Goblin King.” Hazel buried her face in Jareth’s neck.

Sarah wondered at a child who was so terrified that wishing her cousin to the goblins was made as a desperate need for medical assistance when the adults in her life had vanished.

“Would you like to see her?” Hazel nodded as Jareth shared a look with Sarah. They couldn’t leave this child for her uncle to find, but there were rules. “Say your right words.”

“I wish the goblins would take me away. Right now.”


labyfic — drabble #252: thunder
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah parried Bishop’s attack and stepped back, holding up a hand. “I think I’m done for the day.” She felt like she was drowning in sweat and was concerned it would impact her grip on her weapon. “My reactions are slowing and that last round felt like a fluke.”

“Your muscle memory saved you. That’s what we’ve been working towards.” Bishop took her practice blade, returning it to a rack. When he turned back, he found that Sarah was sitting on the floor of the training room, watching as a pair of huge guardians used a wheeled scaffold to attach equipment to mounts in the ceiling.

Of the things she could identify, there were monkey bars, trapeze swings, hanging rings and a cargo net. She turned to Bishop as he sat beside her to watch the setup. “What are they doing? There’s not enough clearance for the boys to use anything dangling.” With a measuring glance at the installation in progress, she thought they may clear the floor, but it would be close.

Chuckling as he agreed with the comment, Bishop shook his head. “Once they set up around the perimeter of the room, they’ll bring in the mats, which will close the gap a little more.” Sarah nudged him with her shoulder. “Okay,” he laughed. “The foxes like to run aerial exercises every so often.”

Sarah turned at the sound of excited chatter and saw a group of small, slender women of various Above ethnicity that ranged from Japan through most of Asia, across India and down to Northern Africa. Ada and George, both in human form, fitted right in, although they were now taller than most of the foxes.

“How are they getting up there?” Sarah wasn’t sure if the equipment was out of their reach.

“Sometimes they have a rope climb to start.” Bishop pointed to the cargo net that hung a little lower. “Or they might use that as a starting point, but they’re incredibly agile and can easily make the leap to grab those rings.”

The moment the rolling scaffold cleared the course, the group was off, loudly calling to each other as they encountered each obstacle. As Bishop had noted, they started with a jump for the nearest ring and worked their way around the course. On completing a circuit, they changed things up. One of the foxes hung upside down from one of the trapeze bars and used it to swing the others across multiple pieces of equipment. Some scrambled across the cargo net and others crossed underneath the obstacle.

Ada and George were easily keeping up with the group, finding their own ways of changing the main route through the course. Sarah was impressed as they ran a circuit in parallel that was smooth enough to appear choreographed.

“I’ve seen them working together, but that was spectacular. If they’re this good now, they’re going to make a formidable team. I’d still prefer they had a childhood rather than being guardians in training.”


labyfic — drabble #251: rowdy
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah was relaxing in the library, idly doodling with watercolours in the notebook she used for ceramics design ideas. She’d painted a series of stylised floral patterns that she thought had the potential to be a series, but she needed to run a few test pieces to see if her concept would work.

“How did the last function go?” Bishop was working on his own designs and was colouring a pencilled geometric tile design with pastels.

Pushing her notebook aside, Sarah made a noise of disinterest as she shook out her hand. “It was reasonably boring. There was no pressing business to discuss and any of the usual tentative approaches were derailed by a relationship imploding. Most of the gathering regarded it as sport and were taking bets on the progress of the fight.”

Jareth was pleased with himself at scoring a crate of well aged brandy to add to the castle’s cellars after predicting that one of the combatants would end up in the decorative water feature.

“It was difficult to stay awake long enough to be able to depart without causing offence.” She didn’t know why leaving early was regarded as a faux pas when having an overly dramatic public break up wasn’t, but perhaps it was just the spectacle of it all. Sarah wondered if feigning an argument with Jareth and chasing him from the room would have allowed them to depart in a more timely manner.

“Aside from betting on the theatrics, how did you amuse yourselves?” Bishop smudged the pastels to the edges of his design.

Sarah snorted a laugh and covered her mouth as she giggled. “Do you remember the dowager with the precarious hair?”

Bishop chuckled. “The one who insists that the elaborate monstrosity on her head is not a wig despite the wig makers using her to market their wares across the Underground?”

“That’s the one,” Sarah grinned. “She has a new boy toy.” As long as everyone was consenting, she didn’t care, but quietly pondering the dynamics at play with Jareth, had amused them enough to kill time.

“Didn’t she have the last one adorned in a layer of slime that turned the ballroom floor into a slip and slide?” Bishop asked.

“Yeah,” Sarah nodded. “She found another weak chinned young man. This one she dressed in a body suit of leather he appeared to be sewn into. It had such a limited range of movement that he couldn’t sit down. When you got close enough, you could hear it creak as he moved.”

The outfit caused him to waddle like a penguin and Sarah was surprised he hadn’t been knocked over by the disagreeable couple and had to wonder if he would have floundered like an upturned turtle.

“His outfit did provide us with an amusing distraction, especially as the dowager would stop mid conversation to rush over and delicately place a morsel of food in his mouth like he was a Pekingese.” Sarah shook her head at the dramatics.


labyfic — drabble #250: weak
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah looked across the crowded room to see her husband conversing with a woman whose overly dramatic hand motions were in sharp contrast to the tranquility of Jareth's resting bitch face. With an inward smile, she disengaged herself from her own discussion and noted the slight change in Jareth’s expression as he saw her approach.

Irene had told her how much she hated the formal functions she attended with Sarah’s father. It was never a quiet meal together when they were geared towards networking and building connections. Added to that was the deep seated misogyny of the men who attended. As frustrating as this was, Irene had learned to use it to their advantage and a giggle or fluttered eyelash at the right time could encourage a man to brag about his accomplishments. They never seemed to expect that Irene cheerfully shared all of her gathered intel with Robert.

Sarah couldn’t follow Irene’s example of stroking fragile male egos for corporate espionage when she was effectively the head of the company. She had to smile politely as an ambassador for the Goblin Kingdom, but she did have the advantage of knowing that Jareth wasn’t giving away the family jewels to a pretty smile.

Taking her hand as she approached, Jareth kissed her fingers, apologised to his companion and swept Sarah onto the dance floor.

“You looked like you needed rescuing,” Sarah breathed into his ear.

Jareth huffed in amusement. “Your timing is impeccable. I was in imminent danger of expiring from boredom.”

“Was she truly that bad?”

Jareth hummed under his breath. “She’s petitioning to sell fabric within our kingdom and is a little pushy.”

“Is that what she was wearing?” Sarah frowned as Jareth nodded. The dress had been simple in design, but the fabric was iridescent, floaty and unlike anything she’d seen before. “It’s lovely.”

Jareth agreed that it was a fine product, aside from the flaw of being highly combustible. “Not something that should be anywhere near goblins who are likely to test flammability out of curiosity.”

Sarah winced. It would be a disaster waiting to happen. “How about instead of setting up business in our kingdom, she invites small groups of prospective clients to her kingdom and showcases her wares?” Sarah explained the concept of a fashion show with people modelling clothing for buyers.

“Even if a viewer doesn’t buy, they would return home and spread the word.” Jareth smiled broadly. “If we insist that any purchased garments are to be worn and stored outside the kingdom, that would allow her to charge storage fees and it may increase interest rather than feeling onerous if marketed in the right manner.”

Sarah glided across the floor. “Spectacle and exclusivity would be a difficult to resist drawcard.”

“You should have the honour of broaching your workaround plan.” Jareth guided Sarah back towards the enthusiastic fabric merchant.”

“You just want someone to hold your hand.” Sarah’s breath ghosted against Jareth’s cheek.

“I will always want to hold your hand.”


labyfic — drabble #249: tranquil
Part of the Balance!verse

Sarah lay back on the lawn of the small courtyard garden. She closed her eyes and listened to the gentle breeze as it rustled the foliage around her. She’d had a day of back to back meetings, followed by lessons in dance, fencing and magic.

“When they say to touch grass, I don’t think they mean with your whole body.”

Her lips quirked a half smile at Bishop’s comment. “I didn’t set anyone on fire today and felt the need to ground myself.” She happily wiggled her toes.

“My point stands, but if you have to deal with that lot from this morning again, I recommend against restraining yourself. They could do with a good immolation.”

Sarah shuddered, but smiled inwardly at the thought that her team would have cheerfully consigned any future requests for an audience to bureaucratic purgatory.

“I finally caught up with Irene last night.” Sarah had been playing phone tag with her stepmother for a couple of weeks as their busy schedules clashed.

“Wasn’t Jareth helping her with a baklava recipe?” Bishop pulled Sarah to her feet and ushered her to a bench seat. “Sorry, honey squares.”

With a laugh, Sarah shook her head at Irene needing to hide her dabbling in foreign recipes under an innocuous title to slide it below the radar of entrenched isolationism. “That was the last I’d heard, but it sounds like her life is almost as dramatic as ours.”

“What has she gotten herself involved with now?”

“One of the ladies in her book club lives in a neighbouring town and has a house lumbered with an HOA.”

Bishop cocked his head to the side. “I take it that’s a bad thing.”

“Not always, but over time they tend to be a magnet for petty tyrants and bullies, as seems to be the case for Irene’s friend.”

“I take it she rectified the situation?” Bishop asked.

“You could say that,” Sarah laughed. “She roofied the board.”

Bishop turned on the bench to look at Sarah fully. “I’m going to need more details than that.”

Sarah explained that the head of the HOA had a sweet tooth and demanded snacks be provided at all meetings, so Irene had baked a series of honey based treats, including the baklava she’d been perfecting.

“This is where Jareth’s assistance came in because he provided her with lavender honey.”

Bishop barked out a laugh. “I assume you don’t mean honey made by bees pollinating lavender flowers.” Sarah shook her head, biting her lip to hold back a giggle. “He gave Irene hallucinogenic honey?” It was named for the slight colour tinge.

“Between Irene’s honey treats and her friend’s pot brownies, the board was easily convinced to disband the HOA.” To complete her public downfall, the president had managed to wander outside and was arrested for public intoxication after attempting to lick a policeman.

“I don’t know whether Irene is a menace or a genius.”

“Or a queen who knows how to work her skill set.”


labyfic — drabble #248: slice
Part of the Balance!verse

It was the little rituals in the time she found to decompress from the work day and just settle that Sarah appreciated.

Reading something light helped the transition, so she was curled up in a chair in the library working her way through a trashy romance novel that Bishop had recommended. While theoretically she could see the advantages of a harem of men catering to the needs of one woman, she shuddered at the thought of the logistics of catering to more than one man in her life.

Bishop had moved onto a different trope, but Sarah just couldn’t suspend her belief enough to accept that the main character was interacting with someone so beyond their strata for altruistic reasons. Now if he could find a variant where the wealthy character’s assets were redistributed to the community, she might have more interest.

Taking a sip of her tea, she glanced at Jareth over the rim of her cup. He was stretched out on a lounge, one arm flung over his eyes. He gave every indication of being asleep, aside from the hand gripping Rook’s shoulder.

Rook was the anomaly in Sarah’s evening of domestic normality. The woman radiated tension. Sarah’s initial reaction in the past had been to discuss the issue, but Jareth had gently discouraged that in favour of letting Rook work through her own rituals.

Rook was sitting on the floor, leaning back against Jareth’s chair. An unreasonably large collection of knives were at her side. Sarah had watched as the woman had walked into the room and silently started to remove the arsenal from her coat. She still couldn’t believe it was possible to carry that much weight without destroying the structural integrity of the garment.

After a comically long disarming routine, Rook was now methodically sharpening her blades with a whetstone. It was an oddly calming sound, but Sarah expected it was not the sound that Rook was using to exorcise her demons.

While this wasn’t a common occurrence, it had happened enough that it had become part of Sarah’s normal. Rook would slowly sharpen all her knives and would then stow them back in her coat. Usually, by the time she’d worked through her arsenal, she had calmed down and would quietly retire for the evening. She didn’t want to talk to people, but she needed to be near people when she’d had a bad day, and Sarah could respect that.

She sometimes wondered how her life had become evenings of smutty book recommendations from one shapeshifter, while another was working through her issues by making sharp implements even sharper, but then she looked at Jareth and knew that she wouldn’t trade whatever passed for a regular family evening Above for anything.

All families had quirks and it was quieter than having a family member who drunkenly yelled at televised sportsball events, so she’d take sullen silence over inebriated obsession. It might be weird, but it was the little rituals that held a family together.


labyfic — drabble #246: steel
Part of the Balance!verse