It's been a while, hey? I am enjoying life and not stopping to reflect upon it much, which is good, but in some ways a shame as I enjoy chronicling it all. A lot has happened, including my 29th birthday, a visit from my friend Katy who lives in Istanbul, and all sorts of other events. I keep my weekday evenings busy with kickboxing and meeting friends, and David and I always get up to some adventures at the weekend. As a Valentine's Day gift he surprised me with a night away in a country house in South Wales - which was incredibly relaxing - so we've even had a mini holiday already this year. I feel sad I didn't make more effort to update this journal as I want to remember all these wonderful days.

I've been giving serious consideration to finally killing off minny and starting afresh somewhere. I've been "Minny" for over eleven years on this site and have an awful lot of sentimentality attached to it, but it also feels rather stale and no longer reflects who I am. The internet has changed a lot, or perhaps I've become more wise to its true nature, but I no longer feel cocooned in the warm fuzzy community of LiveJournal, with our friends-locked entries and revelations of secret anxieties and yearnings. I've become less lonely in my personal life which means I don't need the emotional outlet any more, hence why I've not written a locked entry since 2010. In any case I'm more mature and aware of how damaging it can be to effectively gossip about my life and the people in it, even to anonymous internet strangers from whom they are detached and might as well be characters in a story. You can argue this was always an unhealthy and unkind method of catharsis, but in recent years the internet has become too close to every day, normal life for this to be in any way a comfortable practice. I've changed the way I write and what I share and the way I use the site. I archived and made private all of my entries before February 2011, but despite using a special program, I've not been able to mass delete them. Since they're locked to private, it shouldn't make any difference, but I feel aware they are still there; I feel confronted by my past and sort of embarrassed by it.

Given that I don't need LiveJournal's privacy settings and I've started to use Google Reader a lot more, I did consider leaving the site altogether, but the thought only briefly passed my mind, as what LiveJournal does offer that no where else does is a place where people still write diary entries on the events of their day, rather than dribbling out chippy rants in a ten-a-penny clever-clogs blog entries. I really value that and am honoured people share the details of every day life with me. So no, I'm not leaving LiveJournal, that would be too drastic, but I would like a fresh slate...

I agonised for a while about what to adopt as a new username but couldn't find anything that felt like me. How could I identify with anything closely, when I've been Minny for almost half of my life? I'm Jumaz on computer games (a clumsy amalgamation of my first two names) but while this may suit a battle-scarred elf in Skyrim, it didn't quite feel like me as a writer. Previously I had attempted to begin a blog (yes, one of those disposable ranty things I just complained of) about living in my local area and I registered the name moseleyjules on a blogger site. This name takes off the title of the much-loved Ocean Colour Scene album, Moseley Shoals, references my local area in Birmingham, and identifies with my real name. In fact only my family and oldest friends tend to refer to me as Jules, which to me gives it an extra element of familiarity. I like the name, and while I did wonder about its validity in the long term, as I perhaps may not always live in Moseley, I suppose you could argue that's not really important. After all, I'm fairly sure the songs on Ocean Colour Scene's album aren't about Moseley either.

So that's where I'm off to: moseleyjules

I'd appreciate it if my LiveJournal friends would add me but I'll hopefully have the courtesy to also request this directly of people in comments.

I have cleverly ported across some more recent minny entries over there and I also plan to post to wordpress and cross-post at some point but I've not achieved that technological achievement yet.

I have to finish this entry now as I can feel sentimentality and whispers of regret creeping in. That's it for minny. Hopefully see you at my new digs!

After a grumbling start I feel I've eased back into the routine. My moaning really isn't unusual, my biggest gripe being not anything to do with working itself, just the large amount of my life it takes up in proportion to my free time. It's not forever though and I genuinely feel incredibly positive and happy with my life.

I'm especially buoyant today after a brilliant first weekend after the first week back. We had nothing special planned as such but it all just felt great.

On Friday after work David picked me up and drove us to Shifnal to visit my parents. While not exactly a new year's resolution, seeing them over Christmas did make me resolve to make more effort to go over more often. I also had to drop off my stepdad's belated birthday present (his birthday is in the week after Christmas and is always a little neglected!) and pick up something we'd left during our Christmas visit. It was a brilliant evening - after a cup of tea and catch up we all wandered to a local Indian restaurant that was rather lovely. I noticed they had a lot of freshwater fish on the menu which seemed to be something of a novelty so tried that and the trout curry I had was extremely good.

I was in a very chattery mood which was encouraged by the fact my mom laughs at all my jokes, heh. David almost always stays up later than I do but for once I had more stamina than him and stayed up ages chatting to my mom about all sorts. I forget how much of a good friendship I have with her and how I feel we're on the same page with so many things... that's perhaps only natural when we're related, she's raised me and there's only 21 years between us, but it's still something I appreciate. I feel I'm lucky that there's a lot of mutual respect and a lack of authoritarian parent/daughter element, I really feel listened to when we talk. I know other people don't have such a friendship with their parents. For example, I'll happily invite mine to my birthday meal thing that I've invited other friends to because there's doesn't seem any kind of conflict to me.

The next morning we headed back towards Birmingham and stopped by a cycle shop in Fort Dunlop that I'd seen on the internet. I need a new bike as mine is old and knackered and I now rely on it as a means to get to work. I definitely resent paying £3.80 for a day saver bus ticket when I know I can get to work for free! I've looked into the government's cycle scheme thing for getting a tax free bike and the bods at work are in the process of sorting something out for me. In the meantime, I was window shopping. David's a bit of an expert on these things and had found me a bike to suit my needs. Just as well really as I'm clueless and my choice would have been made almost entirely on cost. I know I want a bike that fits my frame better, as I'm only around 5'1" tall and I'm often unbalanced by the fact I can't quite reach the floor properly (especially on a slope!) but don't want to lower the seat as that will mean my legs are more squashed in reaching the peddle... anyway, I was convinced a size 'small' frame would fix this problem. I also wanted some decent gears and the rest I'm just trusting David on. He's found me a bike from a very good brand and I'm taking his advice. I found it in stock in this Fort Dunlop place so we decided to pay them a visit.

I've never been to Fort Dunlop but it's a huge old landmark building right in the middle of this heavily industrialised part of Birmingham that they've tried to revive by painting bright orange and making all shiny for businesses and shops to set up there. It's still all rather desolate though and when I asked for the loos at the main reception we were sent down a warren of corridors that felt like we were on the Crystal Maze or something. Very weird! Anyway, the bike shop itself was the biggest we'd been to and I was happy there was more to look at. Unfortunately they did not have one size 'small' bike in stock. In any model. They enthusiastically told us how quickly they could order one in. But the whole point of us making a special effort to trek to a soul-less industrial estate was that I wanted to try one out before I ordered one. I already could see what the bloody thing looked like etc by looking online. Useless! I did at least get the woman to list everything I wanted in a quote and then I could present that to my employers if they need it.

Our tummies rumbling, we indulged in a McDonalds burger as we had a voucher (and no will power) and then we decided, having seen a few learner drivers about, that it was about time for me to start my own driving lessons. David is going to teach me but as yet (ssh!) I have no insurance on the car so we were going to find a deserted car park to kick me off but ended up on a small side road in a suburb of Birmingham. It went ok... I think David expected me to have remembered more from my lessons that I had back in 2007 than I actually do, though. I'm sure it will come back to me, just not immediately, and so I was pretty nervous. I must have only been in the car for maybe 10 mins but it's something to start from. We really need to find some waste land or a car park until we can get some insurance sorted.

Then it was back to the flat for a bit of slobbing on the sofa. We watched Ponyo (studio Gibli) which I loved, and had some yummy cous cous (healthy too - totally balances out the McDonalds!).

Sunday we woke up asking "what shall we do today?" and decided to go for a bike ride to Moseley Bog. I've been wanting to go there for ages and it's not far to cycle at all. It was also apparently Tolkien's inspiration for Mirkwood. It was great! I love forest and trees and there are some nice pathways all marked out and I felt in a silly mood. I climbed along one fallen tree trunk that stretched across about 7 foot in the air and felt really proud of my dangerous feat :D

We stopped for half a pint of cider at the Fighting Cocks in Moseley on the way back and then headed to Aldi to buy loads of veggies (healthy food!!!11). Then it was home for more Skyrim, food, and films. Great weekend - lots of good times and fun with my bloke. Very happy Julie!

I need to whinge somewhere. Usually my complaining is so trivial I can keep it to snappy and amusing status updates on facebook or twitter but I'm really down in the dumps today.

Having a long Christmas break is almost cruel as you're able to switch off from routine and enjoy being a fully functional human being for a while. It reminds you what it's like to get enough sleep, wake up at a normal time and spend the day doing things you want to do in a productive way. Now it's back to the grindstone and I'm thoroughly depressed after only four days of dragging my ass out of bed in the darkness, cycling or waiting for buses in howling winds with rain hammering down, sitting awkwardly at a desk for eight hours, and constantly feeling exhausted from lack of sleep. I try to fit in activities tacked on to my day around work, like kickboxing and socialising, just so my day isn't entirely dominated by being at work, but then I get home later and barely get to spend an hour or so in my home with the person I love before I am looking at the clock thinking I should be in bed.

I'm aware that what I'm grumbling about isn't anything unfair. Most people have to do this, all the time, and have additional responsibilities and problems that make my life look like a walk in the park. And I'd say I was entirely content with my life. It's just that the Christmas break, combined with some envy and resentment over David's abundance of free time is making me wish so much that the world didn't work like this. Who decided the working day would drag on so long? Who decided that in the winter we should all get up in the dark?

I'm always of the mind that if something makes you unhappy then you should find a practical solution. The thing is, I actually like my job a lot, it's just that society or convention or whatever dictates that 37 and a half hours is a good amount of time to be stuck behind a desk. Great. Even if I was able to switch to part time work tomorrow, I couldn't take up the offer. I don't care about making money or saving, but I am trying to be responsible for the mistakes I made in the past. I have a lot of debt, and due to buying a car and a piano and having a tough few months, it's not gone down at all. It's quite easy to be pessimistic and gloomy about it.

I know this is the January blues and not uncommon. I know that nothing is permanent and you never know what's round the corner. I'm also struck with guilt when I consider how incredibly fortunate I am and what a happy life I lead. I'm just having a moan.

Happy New Year! My Christmas and New Year break has been brilliant, I've actually surpassed the aspirations I had. Not only have I enjoyed a real break from my normal routine and become completely rested and chilled out, but I was also pleasantly surprised at how active I was and how much I packed in.

The thurstails before Christmas was funny. The previous year we'd booked into Metro bar in Birmingham, very nice bar not far from Colmore Row and Hotel du Vin. The food was great and the decorations were lovely so we'd decided to re-visit the place again for our Christmas meal this time round. Unfortunately, before heading to the restaurant we kicked things off in a bar with a very good half price wine offer... by the time we got to the restaurant we were rather tipsy. It was a shame actually because the food was gorgeous. The restaurant was noticeably quieter though and the staff seemed at a loose end. Guess that's the recession maybe!

Christmas Eve-eve I was at work but in the evening David and I went on a massive late night shopping trip at the Tesco at Five Ways, as it's open 24 hours. We spent quite a lot but got enough to stock the cupboards for the holidays, some nibbles and food for Boxing Day, and a few bottles of booze as gifts. Late night shopping is soul destroying though! I'd got a list, and a clear idea in my mind of what I wanted, but found the L-shape warren-like layout of the shop extremely confusing. Thankfully we got almost everything on the list, but not before I'd had a mini nervous breakdown looking for cheese...

I like baking. This year I had decided I wanted to make a gingerbread house, as I did before a couple of years ago, and also make a Christmas cake for the first time. The Christmas cake I had made a few weeks ago and poured a load of rum into it. Mmm. I then stored it in a cupboard and completely forgot about it. I know you're supposed to occassionally feed it more alcohol or something but I just forgot! I was relieved to find it turned out ok though, and used the morning of Christmas Eve to finish it off with marzipan and icing sugar. The marzipan was left over from David's birthday cake but I had to roll it out thinner to make it stretch. I was terrified putting the icing sugar layer on (I was using 'easy to roll' stuff from a packet) but in the end it looked smooth and brilliant white. THEN, thanks to Delia, I decided to be a little adventurous with the decoration. I had a tree, a star and two little snowmen. I was so pleased with how perfect it looked and everyone who's tasted it has said it tastes great. I feel rather proud :D

Baking and constructing a gingerbread house is like a miliary operation.

1. First, you need to make the dough, which is messy stuff involving black treacle. This should be left in the fridge for a few hours so stage one requires an evening all to itself really.
   
2. Then, you have to make the slabs of gingerbread that make up the walls and roof pieces. Rolling out the very sticky dough is the most challenging thing, then using a template from the internet I cut the pieces into the right shape and baked them like giant cookies. I had a lot of dough, enough for three houses in the end, so this stage took me hours!
   
3. Then, with the pieces baked and cooled, you make a huge batch of royal icing (icing sugar, egg whites and lemon juice) and stick on to it the sweets you want to decorate it with. This is the fun, creative part :D David and I decorated a house each.
   
4. Finally, you have to construct the thing. This means standing one slap at a corner to another slab, keeping them in place with tins, and then running a line of icing between them to act as mortar.
   
5. The trick is to give lots of time in between doing this for each piece. Once the icing sugar is dry, it holds really well, but you need to give each seam time to dry before attempting another one.
   

This was a problem: time. I'd booked my last day's holiday allowance a couple of weeks before Christmas with the intention of devoting the day to gingerbread house making, but I'd then spent the day doing something else instead. Suddenly, somehow, Christmas Eve had arrived and the slabs were all done but the houses still needed to be decorated and constructed. The decorating was fun! It's lovely to do somehting creative. Constructing them because a challenge because the race was on. I didn't have time to let the sides dry properly before adding the roof. The roof just wouldn't stay on and cracks started appearing in the gingerbread and it was all going to go wrong... In the end, we went to bed and my gingerbread house was still minus its roof. I had been intending to take mine to my parents' on Christmas day as a gift for the family but despite adding the roof as soon as I got up on Christmas morning, I wasn't confident it was set, so I didn't take it in the end...

I had thought perhaps I'd take it to my grandparents (my biological dad's parents) one day but as it happens I've not managed to fit in a visit to my grandparents this holiday, just a phone call. So now, I'm stuck with a whole gingerbread house and no one to give it to. I wish I knew a family with kids as I'd love to give it to children. I also don't know how long gingerbread lasts for. We've been given so much chocolate, sweets, etc AND have Christmas cake left over, that we're not tempted to keep it ourselves - plus we've got leftover gingerbread slabs anyway. Oh dear.

One gingerbread house available, free to a good home!

David's gingerbread house, however, we took to his nan's house and she LOVED it. His whole family were really impressed and thought it was a lovely idea. I found it very rewarding that it brought so much joy to them!

So anyway, the preceding couple of days up to Christmas had been a bit stressy and frantic. Christmas morning itself was lovely. David and I had set a budget of £30 each for gifts which meant we'd both ended up buying, small thoughtful things instead of anything flashy. I'd been determined to get as much as I could for my money. He ended up with a red and grey scarf (New Look, massively reduced in the sale), a black flat cap (from a charity's eBay shop, but from Urban Outfitters originally and still had the label attached), a bottle of mead from the medieval fayre, some Lindor truffles, a phrase book on 'Dirty German' (he LOVES this, ha), a children's book set in Prague by a Czech author, a candle from the German market and photo calendar from Jessops with photos of us we'd taken all through this last year we've been together. Soppy, but I'm pleased with it :D

I was spoiled! He got me a beautiful necklace from the German market, some flower hair clips, a Christmas mug from John Lewis with different types of flavoured green tea (I LOVE THIS), a reindeer chocolate lolipop, and a book I'd been talking about called Why French Women Don't Get Fat. Haha!

After I had gone rather over the top for his birthday gift, I loved the contrast in having a much more low-key, intimate Christmas effort. I normally go a bit nuts over Christmas and spend loads but I managed to really control myself this year. I still spent a lot but it felt like I was really in control. I feel encouraged, like I can hopefully bash down some of my debts this year.

For Christmas lunch we headed to David's mom's house in Rowley Regis. The meal and David's family were all really nice. We opened gifts afterwards and I noticed their habit is to respectfully wait for one person to open one gift before handing out another one, where as I think in my family we distribute gifts so everyone has a present in their hands then all dive in at once ripping the paper off. One of those things you never realised other people did in a different way until you come across it!

Sometime mid afternoon we headed to Shifnal to finally see my family. I think this was the first Christmas morning I hadn't woken up in the family home, but I suppose since they moved to a bungalow in Shifnal earlier this year, it has very much felt like their home rather than a family home, so it was never going to be the same anyway. Last year, I'd been at home on Christmas morning and my brother and his girlfriend were visiting her family for Christmas before coming to us in the evening. We always open presents first thing ("Santa's been!!") but I insisted last year we should wait til Rich arrived in the evening. I mean, who wants to arrive to find the fun's over and you've been left a few pressies under the tree? Present opening should be all done together! This year, the tables had turned. Rich and Shell had arrived before Christmas and it was David and I joining late on Christmas day. Apparently, Richard was all up for opening presents first thing in the morning and it was Shell who had to remind him that last year, I'd made everyone wait. Bah, little brothers, there's gratitude for ya! ;)

Again, we were really spoiled. My parents gave David and I vouchers that can be spent in any shop in the Bullring as well as the game I wasnted (SKYRIM SKYRIM SKYRIM) and the blu ray David wanted of Blue Planet and a bunch of other stuff like toiletries and chocolates and alcohol. Rich and Shell bought us a taste experience thing which we can spend on a big list of things like beer tasting, wine tasting, etc. as well as some wine and chocolates.

I'd tried not to spend too much this year so bought everyone alcohol and small gifts. My parents have found a local ale they like the taste of, although they're not normally ale drinkers, so I selected three ales from Tesco and packaged them in cardboard covered in Christmas paper to look like a real gift set as as sort of beginner's-guide starter set to ale drinking. They're really into their gardening so I also got them a RHS gardening kit with a sort of Batman-style utility belt and a mug and tea, and a grow your own sunflowers kit. I got Rich and Shell a murder mystery evening kit and some wine. No idea if they'd actually do it but they're about the only people I know who have the right kind of friends to really pull off something like that!

The evening of Christmas day was mostly spent picking at the food my mom had put out, vegetating in front of Downton Abbey (which I had asked to watch but was then rather annoyed at how LONG and BORING it was, bah), and playing on the SNES that my brother's friend had bought him for Christmas. It was lovely to catch up with my family though, and I chatted to ages to Shell about computer games - she was already playing Skyrim and enthused about it and I said it sounded like Fallout 3. Now I've actually started playing, I have realised it's made by the same people, has the same game mechanics and is exactly like Fallout 3, heh.

The next day we had to head back to our place late morning as we had invited my parents and David's family to come round to our flat on the evening of Boxing Day for some nibbles. His family and mine hadn't met before so this was in some ways quite a big deal. Also we'd never hosted anything before so that was rather exciting too! We were cutting it fine as we arrived home with about four hours to clean the flat, cook food and get ourselves ready. In the end, we did it all in time. No curled up turkey sandwiches for us - we had a kind of seafood risotto/paella thing (it was supposed to be paella but we only had risotto rice!), homemade pizza and home made breaded chicken strips. There was also plenty of crisps and nibbly things. My Christmas cake was at the centre of the table. We put on a rather good spread! Both sets of families arrived and to mine and David's relief, everyone got on well and had plenty to talk about. Both sets have told us since how they enjoyed meeting the other. It couldn't have gone better really!

The next day David had an audition with a band based somewhere near Coventry, and I went off to my annual get together with old school mates in Wolverhampton. I met up with Helen for a quick drink before moving on to the Nickleodean in Wednesfield to meet the others. It shows I'm getting old in that now when I meet old friends we have to consider where will be child-friendly places to meet - eek! There was quite a large group of us in the end as Jo and David had both their kids with them - Tommy who isn't yet two, and one month old James. I quite enjoyed sitting by Tommy and playing with him and by the end of things we were good friends, I think. I haven't held such a tiny baby since I was a kid though (since my cousin Stephen was born, who is now married and living in the US, argh!) so I was in two minds whether I would ask to hold James. I didn't in the end because after he'd been passed to a couple of people he woke up and wanted his mum. The whole atmosphere was really relaxed and fun and I enjoyed catching up with everyone so much!

On 28th I met up with Sally for the first time in a while, and the first time in absolutely ages when we'd met up just me and her and not as a group on a night out. She moved to Northfield in south Birmingham earlier this year and I'd still not been round to visit. David dropped me off then headed back for a lesson with his piano student and Sally and I spent a good while chatting and catching up. I left not really knowing how I was getting back but was pleased to find I could easily jump on one bus from hers down the Bristol Road to a stop near the cricket ground, from where it's about 25 mins walk back to my house. No excuse not to visit now! :)

29th David and I finally had a day free to go into the city centre to hit the shops with our Bullring voucher. We picked up a second controller for the PS3 so we can beat each other up, I got a pair of dark brown leather ankle boots half price in the sale from Clarks which pinch me terribly but I've fallen in love with them so I'm trying to 'wear them in' round the flat before I decided whether to keep them, David got a jumper from GAP and some jeans from New Look. We've still got some left too! My parents were very generous!

Nat and John had said they'd also be around in Birmingham that day. Every time I'd tried to meet up with Nat in recent months it hadn't worked out for one reason or another so I didn't want to get my hopes up but in the end it was easy and we ambushed them as they queued for the tills in TK Maxx. After chatting in the middle of the shop for ages they invited us to join them at TGI Fridays that evening (it had been John's birthday the previous night) and so we parted and met up later on. Rachel joined us at the restaurant and we had a brilliant time. I've really missed spending time with them and I hope we can see them more often this year.

After days of laziness and gluttony, David and I went for a nice winter's walk the next day in some fields somewhere near Stourbridge. I moaned quite a lot about things. It was really muddy and David was disappointed in my attitude that getting covered in mud is a bad thing. I'm not terribly girly about it, I just try to avoid it if possible!! David made friends with some horses who enjoyed the attention. It was good to get some fresh air!

One of the things I'd promised myself this holiday break was a day I could spend in my pajamas playing computer games. Finally, I got this on 31st and played loads of Skyrim and didn't go out and thoroughly enjoyed it :) In the evening, David's former housemate Stefano joined us and after a quick meal and a bottle of wine or two we headed into Kings Heath. We had intended to see in the New Year in a cosy cafe bar called Cherry Reds which is an intimate little place where we thought there'd be a good atmosphere and a bit nicer than a crowded pub. We got there, had a couple of drinks, but then around 10pm everyone started filtering out, presumably moving on somewhere else. We eventually decided to move to the Hare and Hounds which was a lot livlier and had a much better atmosphere as everyone counted down to midnight and welcomed 2012 :) Stefano, who is Italian and doesn't always fully understand situations, kept asking about where else we could go. There is a very popular club upstairs in Hare and Hounds but like most places, you need to buy New Years Eve tickets in advance, and they're not cheap. David and I just weren't interested in that kind of night out and only wanted a drink in a pub. I thought Stefano would have expected this so I was a little bemused at his enquiries. I thought maybe he wanted to meet women so I obnoxiously got talking to a table of girls, only to turn around to find he wasn't even looking. Bah, my wing-woman efforts were wasted!

We got home around 3am and slept in the next day, which would have been fine except David had said we'd go to his nan's house for lunch the next day. Oops! We dropped Stefano home and arrived at his nan's for a full Sunday roast, feeling a little delicate and insanely thirsty. I enjoyed it but I was glad to get home and slump on the sofa for more Skyrim and a film. We ended up staying up til the early hours talking about all sorts. One of those brilliant nights, but my body clock is completely screwed now - not looking forward to work tomorrow!

David's piano lesson is on today so after a brief walk in the park together, I've come to a cafe to type all this up while he's giving his lesson. I am so pleased at how much fun and relaxation I've had this Christmas and New Year, it's been brilliant. I feel so close to David and so hopefully and excited for 2012 :)

Oh dear, I've fallen behind, been up to loads, and my LiveJournal celebrated its 11th birthday (wow!).

I feel I ought to cover the last few weekends as they've been fun and festive!

Going back a couple of weeks, David and I went to the Ludlow Medieval Fayre. He's been every year for a few years and was keen to go again, and I was happy to give it a go. We didn't dress up though, I hasten to add!!

I've never been to Ludlow before although I heard it's supposed to have a big food festival and a reputation with food lovers. It's a nice little English town with cobbled streets and inviting shops and cosy pubs. When we arrived it was jam packed with people. David said he'd never seen it so busy and we gathered from snippets of strangers' conversations that coach companies were now bussing people in for this festival. After a wander round the streets and a quick peek at a market we headed to the castle where the event was being held. It's an impressive castle!!

Within the grounds, there were stalls laid out selling all kinds of food and drink and a couple of tents with more stalls, and stages with entertainment on. We ended up watching a Robin Hood show where the actors picked kids to play the parts. It was SO funny - the kids basically repeated the lines that were whispered in their ears but they were brilliant. A little lad playing the 'executioner' kept toddling around the stage, haha. It was all outdoors and aside from it being a little blustery, it was warm enough and light enough to enjoy standing outside - and great to get some fresh air!

Back in the town centre we managed to find a corner of a pub to enjoy some hearty pub food before heading back for the evening programme of events. After dark the castle looked spooky and they'd rigged up lights and smoke machines to make it look as if the castle had caught fire!

As the temperature was dropping, we spent some time in a tent where there were people dressed in medieval clothing and performing music on medieval instruments. At one point there was a sort of Christmas play which was fun although one lady didn't know her lines! After a lot of wandering between some lovely stalls and stopping in a bar area for a beer, we ended up inside a round tower in the castle watching a small singing group. It was a brilliant end to it all!

Hmm, I'm frustrated with how bad my memory is and I wish I had kept this journal better updated! Perhaps I should just write about what sticks out in my mind...

Another highlight was an event the following weekend run by a local community group that's concerned with maintaining Highbury Hall and Highbury Park, which is very near our flat and somewhere we love to visit. There was wreath making and I made a slightly bedraggled wreath for our flat which is now proudly adorned above David's piano :)

We got our Christmas tree in. I take Christmas trees very seriously! I've tried to have one every year, and for a long time that was a 4ft Woolworths tree with straggly bits of silver tinsel, multicoloured Poundland lights and blue and purple baubles. It moved with me from flat to flat. Then when I moved to Birmingham and felt a bit more settled I bought a rather more impressive 6ft tree, bought some fat gold tinsel and beautiful glass baubles from a specialised Christmas shop. I added the odd larger fancy baubles and other shaped decorations that stand out as little treasures on the tree. Last year I even bought a bauble from Harrods; mostly because I wanted to buy something from their Christmas shop and I knew I'd always remember where I got it from!

When I moved to our current flat we were quite overwhelmed with the moving so decided to leave behind my tree in the shed of my old house. I told myself I could always go back and get it, but as months passed I felt more detached from that part of my life and somehow it didn't seem appropriate to go back there. Plus, more importantly, David was really keen on the idea of a real tree. I don't remember having a real tree before, my mom had always said the pine needles make a mess and we'd always brought the same plastic tree down from the loft every year. One day David rang me from Wilkinsons saying they had them for £20 and that was it - we had our tree! It came in its own pot and David's nan gave us a little red felt skirt to tie round the bottom. It's gorgeous!

I still had all my decorations from my old tree and we've since found a couple more (in charity shops for 10p - bit less than what I paid at Harrods). My white lights were left behind though so I reverted to coloured as they were David's preference. The tree is so multicoloured and magical. I love how you can stand back and look at it as a glittering, shining whole or sit there and notice one or two special decorations. I just find Christmas trees so beautiful :)

I've been to the German market in the city centre a couple more times recently. Two weeks ago Hannah was absent from Thurstails and Kelly and I decided rather than going to a restaurant, we would just visit three or four of the stalls. I ate SO MUCH FOOD but it was really enjoyable to wander round and really indulge. I think today may be the last day so I'm hoping to get some garlic bread after work - it's amazing!

All of David's presents are bought and mostly wrapped. We set ourselves a £30 budget which I accidentally broke because I didn't think an Amazon order would arrive in time so I ordered an alternative gift, then they both arrived this week. Oops. I haven't spent more than £35 or £40 though. It was a really good idea for me as when it comes to loved ones I can go a bit mad in expressing my love in an entirely materialistic way and continuously keep buying stuff I think they'll like until Christmas arrives. I went nuts for his birthday so keeping a budget for Christmas was a very, very good idea!

I try to buy friends small gifts even though I may not have had a lot of contact with them or it's not such a big deal to do so. People grumble a lot at Christmas that they don't enjoy buying presents and don't see the point but I am an unashamed consumer and I love giving gifts. I love buying stuff and I love thinking about what people like and what would be suitable for them. it's entirely selfish, I recognise, as it's me who gets the buzz out of it.

I have to say this year even my consumerism was at its limits though. I've had a lot of time in recent months to browse the net and so I've over-indulged in online window-shopping. I've tried to be careful not to actually spend too much but all the same; any time there's been anything I've been remotely interested in buying I've tapped it into Google and researched the hell out of it, even if I never actually then go on to buy it. It's not a great hobby, really, I should probably apply myself to something more fulfilling.

I surprised myself this year. I usually think very carefully about what to buy people, search online, read the Boots catalogue from cover to cover, then maybe in late November if I haven't seen anything better, I make finally decisions to buy things. This year I was quite simply broke until I got paid at the end of November, and during one afternoon once my salary hit my account, I did a whirlwind dash round a few shops and found suitable gifts at decent prices for everyone within the space of a couple of hours. I think only my grandparents' gift is outstanding now and I'm always a little lost what to get them.

I am making gingerbread houses again this year though :D It took me a one evening to make the dough and a whole afternoon to shape/bake it but now I have the panels and icing sugar all ready for construction. I just need some sweeties for decoration and I plan to get those after work. I hope they work out!

All my various Christmas functions are now out of the way. The first was the kickboxing Christmas party which is held in the reception area of the club. When it's been planned in the last few weeks I've been very enthusiastic about it! Kickboxing is one of the few places I feel accepted and happy to be myself so I'm a little louder and brasher than I am in normal circumstances I guess... I was the same back when I was hanging round at radio stations, a bit less shy and more attention seeking. Probably annoying for some but I feel secure enough there not to care about annoying people, and that's saying something as I can be a bit more quiet and considerate in other circumstances.

I got there pretty early as I was helping to decorate. Another girl had made loads of lovely handmade paper decorations and we also had a big bag of tinsel left over from last year. By the time we were finished it looked so festive! As this was the second year they'd run a party they had learned from the messiness of last year and decided to run a 'bar' area where people would go and ask for drinks, rather than everyone helping themselves. There was no limit to what people would drink but having to go and ask for their drinks seemed to slow people down. Last year an ambulance had to be called as one girl drank too much. Some people are just so silly with alcohol (heh, not that I'm a saint!). Anyway I was first on the bar which was easy because hardly anyone turned up that early in the evening and I was free to wander round after that. I loved being sociable and chatting to loads of people I'd never met. There were a couple of girls who seemed to be stuck in the corner most the evening and didn't seem to be enjoying themselves so I coaxed them out for a dance. Like I said, I appreciate that kind of thing can be annoying (David said he would hate it!) but sometimes people appreciate it.

My confidence was high and my tolerance for alcohol is low so it didn't take long for me to start dancing (I'm not sure the alcohol was even needed to be honest!) but for most of the people there they didn't start to loosen up til about midnight. I was actually starting to slow down by then, oops.

The kung fu instructor works in the nightclub industry and arranged for us to have free entry to Oceana so a big group of people wandered up there. It was about 1pm but seemed really empty! I must have been fairly drunk as I swung rapidly from feeling like I was having the time of my life to feeling very bored and wanting to leave. Also I'd now been wearing my beautiful new black patent stilettos for five hours and pain was kicking in. I'm grateful that David was awake and came to get me so I got home safely and without shelling out for a taxi.

A week later was my work Christmas do - a much fancier affair hosted by an events company at the ICC in the centre of Birmingham. It was black tie so gave me the chance to dress up. Very rare treat! I mentioned my online window-shopping habit? Well I'd had my eye on this bright blue dress for £40 on the New Look website for ages, almost bought it a couple of times when they sent me 20% off vouchers, and then finally decided that since money was tight, I didn't need a new dress and I'd just wear something old. Then one day I got an email informing me there was 50% off party wear. I checked and the dress... wasn't included. Meh. For some reason I decided to look again the following day and happily, it suddenly was now included in the sale. Joy! £20 seemed like too good a bargain to miss since I'd essentially set my heart on it. It was strappy, loose bright blue crepe-paper-like material with seams running down, a huge diamante flower on one side under the bust, then flared out below (there was an underskirt). It was so gorgeous and glam and on a practical level, I hoped the flaring at the bottom would help balance my figure out as I'm big on top (busty with broad shoulders).

My new shoes were another splurge but something I did need as my old stilettos are knackered. They were only £20 from M&S and I used a 10% off code! But the dress and the shoes together with some opaque black tights... wow. I felt like a million quid. Properly glammed up! It was just a shame I was only going to a work event. I hope there'll be some event David and I can go to where I can get similarly dressed up :)

The evening itself was fairly enjoyable and I got more drunk than I meant to on free champagne and showed a bit more of my personality. There were charity fake gambling tables and I had a go at blackjack with someone's chips and ended up singing at the card dealer (her name was Carol... guess what I sang? Cringe). For the second week in a row I was picked up safely by David at the end of the night. I'm a lucky girl!

On Monday this week was a department Christmas lunch at San Carlos which was nice, although the restaurant wasn't good as it was overcrowded and the staff were incredibly rude. I had an excellent chicken liver pate starter but wasn't impressed with the steak I had as my main. I've been trying to figure out if that's because the food was at fault somehow or because I myself have less preference for red meat. I'd ordered it because it was off a set menu and I'd never normally have ordered steak. Hmm...

I am starting to realise how much I enjoy vegetables and fish though so I'm going to try and remember this and actively make healthier choices when I eat. Stop snacking, eat less bread and pasta, have smaller portions. Little things, not diets or strict regimes. The photos I saw of the kickboxing Christmas party and the dress I wore really showed off my figure and although I'm not "fat" and probably not unhealthy - I remain a size 12 which what I've always been happy with - I'm starting to notice there are places where I probably carry too much weight. I'll try and stay active, make better food choices and hopefully end up a bit slimmer without it being a massive effort.

Well now I shouldn't be talking about limiting excesses a couple of days before Christmas, should I? Plenty of time for regret-laden New Year's Resolutions next week!

To get back to what I was saying, the department Christmas meal ended up a few drinks in a pub or two and then me heading to Kings Heath for a mulled cider with David. I had put away wine, a few rum & cokes and cider and I felt rather rough the next day. I think it kick-started a cold I had been fighting and the following couple of days I was barraged with a sore throat, cough, and it's now turned into stuffiness and sneezing. I think I'm on the mend though as I've not been on the paracetamol today. I have been rather tired though...

Last night was the last thurstails before Christmas :) We'd booked to go to the same impressive restaurant as last year - Metro - but foolishly went to a bar first that had a half price offer on bottles of wine. Two bottles later we turned up at the restaurant rather inebriated and loud. It was a different atmosphere from last year anyway as half the tables were empty and they cleared them away around 8.30. It felt like the four serving staff were watching us like hawks and there wasn't much of a gap between courses. The food, however, was excellent. Despite what I said above, since I'd only had salmon the previous night I wasn't tempted by the fish option and so went for beef again. It was slow-cooked and GORGEOUS. The dessert was a Christmas pudding parfait. I didn't even know what a parfait was when I ordered it but it was so light and delicious. Best meal I've had eating out in ages! Shame I wasn't more sober to properly appreciate it, heh.

I've felt half asleep all day but it's the LAST working day of 2011 for me as I've booked off the time between Christmas and New Year. I'm looking forward to a break and to properly spend some time with my family and David. I'm planning to go to a carol service at the cathedral tonight and then I plan to construct my gingerbread houses and wrap a few more pressies later.

Thanks to anyone who's read this all year and I wish you a very Merry Christmas and a fantastic 2012!

Wow, it feels as if we're really zooming towards Christmas - another weekend gone! :O

Thankfully not much to report on the cycling front. I honestly thought I'd be finding excuses not to do it by now but instead I'm starting to (whisper it) enjoy it. I still need to gain a little road sense but that's only going to come with time. As someone who's always been reliant on public transport (or more recently, my boyfriend-chauffeur ;) ), it's rather refreshing to have the independence of controlling exactly when I'm setting off, stopping and starting, routes to take, etc. if also a little terrifying. I'm so used to being passive in my commuting; all I do is get to the bus stop as early as I can, the rest of my journey is in the hands of the gods of public transport and traffic congestion.

Since the clocks changed I haven't been jogging in the morning much so at least the cycling's helping with my fitness, and giving my (crap) metabolism a boost first thing in the morning.

The weekend we didn't go far afield. Friday night we stayed up watching Das Leben der Anderen, which I enjoyed far more than when I last watched it back in 2007 when I was supposed to be studying it for uni, watched it without the subtitles and didn't follow the story very well at all. My German was just not up to it (and I didn't do very well at uni!).

Stupidly, we made a late night decision to swap mobile phones, which we'd been planning to do for ages. I've been constantly agitated by the slow processes, crashing, general slow awkwardness of my Sony Ericsson XP Mini Pro and David had a Blackberry 8520 which he wasn't too fussed about. I want a Blackberry as Kelly and Hannah are both on it and use BBM a lot; I'm often out of the loop when it comes to planning things! And to be honest, anything's better than the piece of crap I was using. Every time I moaned about it, he suggested we swap as said he only uses his as a phone and never uses the net, etc.

These technical things never go smoothly though and they're even worse when it's late at night and you're in need of bed. Eventually, we got things sorted, but after lots of grumbling about losing contacts /importing unrequired contacts, internet not working and such boring technical things.

I called O2 the next day because my internet was only partially working. They said it was because I had to sign up to a special tariff if I was on a Blackberry. Oh. I knew I was locked into a 24 month contract that was due to end in January and I had been planning to switch to pay as you go at that point (and pay the required Blackberry bolt on). I'm aware phone companies allow you upgrade before the end of your contract but I didn't expect them to let me downgrade, as such. Yet they told me on the phone I could upgrade as of that day and when I told them what I wanted they put me on a monthly rolling SIM only contract. Including the Blackberry stuff it's £13 per month. I was previously on £30 per month. And they let me go from that two months before my contract ended. Nice one!

Anyway it took forever to get things up and running. I think I've got BBM working now, finally, but the internet's still not all working so I need to ring O2 again. I have been promised by friends that immersing myself in BBM will change my world/blow my mind/etc but it's early days, I'll see how it goes. Meanwhile, David's already shocked at how rapidly the battery is sucked from the phone he's had off me. That's touchscreen phones for ya!

Back to this weekend, after the late night of trying to overcome technological difficulties, we slept in late on Saturday then went into the city centre and enjoyed a few hours at the German Christmas market, that just opened this weekend. It's in Birmingham city centre every year but this year it's bigger and more crowded than ever. It sprawls from the ICC all long through New Street almost to the entrance of the Bull Ring near the bull statue now. The crowds are immense; just about manageable if you're leisurely wandering round on a Saturday afternoon but I image they're a nightmare if you're trying to get anywhere in a hurry. In particular, the entrance to Tesco on New Street is so crowded I can't believe there aren't some health and safety officials somewhere going nuts. It actually feels slightly dangerous in places - I can image someone who was in some way vulnerable or unsteady on their feet could actually get hurt. Let's hope not!

We enjoyed the usual Glühwein/German Bier and sausages and waffles and tried on silly hats and looked at candles and toys and felt very Christmassy. I love the German market! As part of her birthday celebrations, Kelly had been spending the afternoon there with a big bunch of people and the plan had been to meet them but in the end David ran off as the parking was running out and I stayed and found the group. As I arrived, a few of them were off home, but a group stayed on and after spending another hour or so in the city centre, we caught a taxi to a hotel Kelly had booked on the Hagley Road. I wasn't planning to stay in the hotel, but wanted to be involved with all the getting ready together/watching TV/drinking wine and then heading out as a group, so I had brought clothes and make up with me.

It was good fun, although the cheap wine I'd brought was like anti-freeze and I think was solely responsible for the banging headache I subsequently endured throughout most of Sunday. After we were all primed and ready, we got a taxi to Summer Row, had drinks in Bluu and Apres, and ended up in Mechu. I have to say I enjoyed the night more than I'd anticipated as I didn't feel old or out of place or bored as I sometimes do on a night out. I think it helps that the bars in Summer Row are much, much better than Broad Street! Mechu played a great mix of music and had a good crowd. There was a little bit of drama at the end of the night in the group but for me at least, it didn't take away from the night as a whole being thoroughly enjoyable. Suddenly I wanna go out more often!

I had to return to the hotel to get my stuff but David picked me up from there at 3am or something and listened to all my drunken chatter, only interrupting to tell me I looked good and my eyes looks great (I never normally wear make up so I think it surprises people when I do!). The following morning he then nursed me as I complained about my sore head and encouraged me to get up and go for a walk in the park, which did me the world of good. We went through a wood and there were mushrooms everywhere! I felt very loved and looked-after :)

Yesterday evening we spent watching telly and eating terrible food but it was much fun and I feel very relaxed now :)

This week I'm looking forward to thurstails as part of the Bullring that's been under construction forever is finally opening up and there'll be a lot of places hopefully giving out free food, etc. Also pay day, finally, which means Christmas shopping can properly kick off. I'm pleased for David; after advertising for months, he's finally got his first piano student. I am crossing my fingers he remembers to remove the laundry from the living room before she comes over. Boys just don't think about these things but it always mortifies me when he invites his mates over and my bras are hanging up everywhere!!

Hey LiveJournal! I have a couple of weekends' worth of life to update on.

The weekend before last I arrived home on Friday night, made pasta sauce and lemon biscuits (that turned out to be more like rock cakes, but still, very nice!). On Saturday we went to Stourbridge as David had been there earlier in the week and seen a camera in Cash Converters he thought would be suitable for me.

My old trusted Kodak camera that served me admirably through my time Poland etc, decided to die on me on the morning of David's birthday. This meant I had no camera of my own for the entire Prague trip, which was rather disappointing! I expected to make do with my phone camera for a while and pick up a cheap one in the post-Christmas sales, perhaps for my birthday. Personally, I wasn't too fussed on the specs. I want point-and-click, I want it to work and take a photo in focus, without having to worry about lighting conditions or settings. David, on the other hand, is rather interested in cameras and kept suggesting cameras that cost twice as much as I'd envisaged paying because of better specs on things like the lens speed. He did explain why the lens speed was important, but it's just not something I'd have ever considered. How well it fits into a handbag and whether it's a nice shape was about my level of interest. It's a good thing he helped me really or I'd have ended up with something pretty shoddy.

In the end he found a camera from the same range as his own but a lower model (fewer bells and whistles but still good quality) in Cash Converters for £45. It ticked all the boxes and was a good deal so we made the journey over to Stourbridge just to get it. David used to live over there so we met up with his old housemate while we were there. We also picked up some sparklers in Waitrose in anticipation of going to a fireworks display that evening.

While we were over that side of Birmingham we stopped by his nan's house and saw his nan and his mom for a brief visit before heading back to Birmingham to go to a fireworks display...

When I was a kid I am sure there were more displays around! I remember there being one at the local church, pub, community centre, etc. Pubs in particular used to put on displays to bring in business. They'd usually have a bonfire and kids would wave sparklers and the fireworks wouldn't be that amazing but it felt cosy and special.

I tried in vain all week to research some place that would have a small display and couldn't find one. There's a massive, council-run display at Pype Hayes park in Erdington. That's not the most ideal part of Birmingham to get to, and apparently the parking offered was a 'park and ride' from the Fort Shopping centre. Just sounded like a lot of faffing about to go somewhere that probably had a massive crowd and everything overpriced. The only other one I found was at a cricket grounds at Kings Heath. We decided to check that out and arrived about 20 minutes after the fireworks were advertised for, and so we expected we'd perhaps missed the fireworks but hoped for a bonfire or some kind of nice little event. We arrived and there were balloons by the entrance signifying there had been an event on but as we pulled in, the last car was pulling out. They'd evidently had the display and packed up and left within half an hour. Can't have been that good!

We could hear fireworks going off all over the place but I suppose they must have been private events. Maybe churches, schools, etc do put on their own displays but they're just not advertised publicly? I asked on facebook, thinking we'd perhaps missed out due to lack of local knowledge, but people could only suggest Himley Hall in Dudley. Doesn't Birmingham do Bonfire Night?! There was actually a suggestion of Harborne Golf Club in the end so perhaps I'll look into that next year.

Just a bit miffed we missed out really, particularly as we didn't get to use the sparklers!!

On Sunday I think we had a lazy day. We went to the park for a bit, I remember that. It was only a little over a week ago and already I've forgotten what we did. My memory is terrible - that's why I keep this journal!

I have to say I'm in rather a good mood for a Monday morning. I can probably blame the endorphins from cycling in. Trying not to be smug about it but I cycled three days last week and plan to cycle three days this week. I have had a couple of problems; mainly last Tuesday when I came out of kickboxing, said goodbye to my friends, set off, then quickly discovered my front tyre was completely flat. After what happened last time when I locked my bike up in that area (and I had chosen a slightly more conspicuous spot this time), I was convinced it was malicious and someone had let the tyre down, but I guess it could have been a puncture.

I turned back but my friends (a couple of whom would have been driving) had disappeared. This happened to be a night when David wasn't even in Birmingham as he was visiting a friend so I couldn't call him for rescue. I queued up for a bus with the plan of begging the bus driver to let me bring the bike on board (they don't normally allow bikes). There was a long wait and the buses started to go past without stopping. Someone said there'd been an accident in Kings Heath and a girl had been killed. Clearly, when a bus would eventually stop, I suspected it would be too rammed to take a bike. I manoeuvred it down the very steep, narrow steps to my kickboxing club (it's underground - makes it seem very tough! Ha!) where the instructor said it would be alright if I left it there for a day as there was some hidden storage space I didn't even know about. I ran back to the bus stop and waited and eventually a bus turned up, over an hour after I'd begun waiting. It's hard to feel pissed off at that when you know it's because someone died, though.

David picked me and the bike up the following evening. I've mislaid my pump so as a stop-gap, David has replaced my front wheel with the wheel off his own bike. So his bike is out of action but I can still use mine to commute, albeit with odd tyres. Once we relocate/replace my pump we can find out if it was a puncture or if someone left my tyre down. I've got to lock it up again tonight. It's really not easy to bring it into the club (I needed help getting it back up the stairs last time) and so I have to lock it outside, but I'm wondering whether to park it by the market where more people are walking around. Maybe I'm just being paranoid but Digbeth is not a nice area and there are kids just hanging around bored so it wouldn't surprise me if they decided to mess with a bike. David will be at home tonight though so at least I can call for a rescue if necessary!

This weekend just gone was another quiet one. In fact I felt as if I slept through most of it! Both Friday and Saturday night we stayed up late (I made an awesome sausage casserole on Friday night - this has to be noted!) and consequently slept and slept on the following mornings. We have curtains that completely cut out the light so it's possible just to sleep until your body has had enough sleep - which for me is quite a lot!

On Saturday I wanted to go to the Rag Market as this year I'm planning to attempt to make gingerbread houses again for Christmas presents. I made one a couple of years ago and it was quite a feat of organisation and engineering but I was very proud of the result. I remembered buying these white chocolate buttons with coloured bits on from a stall at the Rag Market that made great roof tiles so I decided buying those would be my first step in this year's organisation. I'll figure out the rest later (already I've noticed Sainsburys do a pack of candy canes for £2). All this confectionery can get expensive so I'm trying to buy it bit-by-bit.

We went for a drink in a little cafe in the Pallisades (2 for 1 with vouchercloud, woo) and we weren't sure what to do next. I think we were both groggy from sleeping in so much. I had a nagging feeling there was another shop I wanted to go to and couldn't remember what. Then I saw a child with a light-up wand and it hit me what the other reason was I'd wanted to come into Birmingham on a Saturday - the Christmas parade! The council put a parade on every year to coincide with switching on the Christmas lights. We thought we'd missed it and we were gutted, then noticed people were still lining the pavements and were pleased to find it hadn't started yet. We grabbed a baguette and found a good spot on New Street. I had expected it would just be a Father Christmas sleigh pulled by some reindeer but there was much more than that - there were angels and elves and all kinds of characters. I think the theatres must have sent their cast members from their Christmas shows. The Father Christmas & reindeer were definitely the highlight but I was surprised how much more there were. It finished with a gigantic inflatable Santa Claus which was actually quite scary.

Buoyed with Christmas spirit, we bought a dessert from Tesco and hurried home for a night on the sofa. We watched Cloverfield, which I'd never seen but was actually impressed with (considering I just slagged off another camcorder-type film!!). I annoyed David by commenting so much on how the woman was effortlessly running about in stilettos. That was less believable than the big CGI monster!

The last couple of weekends have perhaps been a bit quieter in that we've not gone quite as far afield in our adventures but I don't really mind. Somehow everything I do with David feels like an adventure. I can hear you aww-ing/retching to that but it's true - I look forward to my weekends so much because our lives are filled with enthusiasm and everything feels like fun :)

Sometimes it takes me a very long time to convince myself to try something new, for me to come round to an idea, if I have some anxieties surrounding it. I think I'd been considering commuting to work by bike for over a year; ever since I first moved to Moseley. I live in one suburb of Birmingham, just out from the city centre, and I work in another, also just out from the city centre, but on the other side of the city.

By bus, my commute is rather disjointed. It involves a 10 min walk to the bus stop, then wait for bus to turn up (which is supposed to be every 10 mins - but can be longer!), 10 mins journey into the city centre, then crossing the Colmore Row area (less than five mins) I can either walk the rest of the way to work (around 10-15 mins of fairly steep hills) or if there happens to be a bus due at a particular stop then I jump on that bus for a short five minute bus journey. From when I leave the house it's maybe 45 mins if I'm lucky with buses, traffic etc.

Nowadays, because we've got the car, I sometimes get a lift into work, but if we don't leave the house early enough we get caught in the morning rush and can be sat chugging away in heavy traffic and wasting diesel. For that reason, if I get a lift then we try leave the house at almost the same time as if I'm getting the bus; the journey is much, much shorter than by public transport but I just arrive at work extremely early.

I've always used my bike as a method of transport but I've not been on the roads in years and Birmingham is not my home city. I found the whole idea quite intimidating. I invested a lot of time in researching possible routes. There didn't seem to be a way to get to where I needed to be without travelling along big arterial routes with heavy traffic, in rush hour. "Just go on the pavement" people said, but cycling on pavements isn't an easy option - it's difficult and dangerous as pedestrians don't know you're there and you have to constantly make judgements as to how to get around them, not to mention navigating kerbs etc.

Then the other aspect which inspired a great deal of anxiety in me was the practicalities of wearing active-wear clothing for cycling, then still being able to transform myself into something vaguely professional-looking when I arrived at the office. Oh god, if there's one thing I get anxious about, like most women, it's my appearance. How would my hair end up looking? What shoes would I wear? Would I be all sweaty? How could I possibly get everything all prepared in the morning? What about days I did kickboxing - would I be able to carry my extra clothes etc?

I kept toying with the idea though, I could never quite talk myself into it or discount it completely. There are obvious benefits both physically and financially. David was very supportive of the idea, to the extent his enthusiasm almost put me off as it made me want to rebel. I completely over-thought and fretted over the practicalities of it all. I was terrified of the roads and traffic.

One day a couple of months ago David and I were both out on our bikes and realised we could reach the city centre quite easily by cycling along the pavement of one of the aforementioned busy trunk roads. The pavements were extremely wide, flat and at points had bike symbols painted on to indicate it was ok to cycle there. Once in the city I'd have to do a little navigation and detour on the pavements to get round to Jewellery Quarter, but suddenly it was starting to look possible. Finally I began to seriously consider commuting by bike. David found me a fluorescent reflective waistcoat and I bought new lights. We attempted (but failed) to install a rack on the back of my bike so I could attach bags.

Then, just as I was slowly, slowly warming to the idea, my bike got nicked.

I am actually more angry and gutted about this, in retrospect, than I was at the time. Suddenly, the option had been taken away from me. I couldn't have cycled to work even if I wanted to! For several days following I lamented my lack of personal transportation. I gazed longingly at other cyclists. I properly envisaged cycling to work - if only I were able..!

Unexpectedly, last weekend my parents provided me with an alternative bike. That settled it for me, I was going to begin cycling to work on Monday morning. I had no plans to go to kickboxing that evening so no worries about transporting my kit, and the weather was dry and mild. The change of clocks (which admittedly I just complained about) meant the mornings were light again. I packed some mary jane wedges, opaque black tights and rolled up a dress into a rucksack. My handbag has a cross body strap and I hoped would sit on my backside held in place by the rucksack (it didn't, I've since learned to pack it inside the rusksack). I packed deodorant and a proper hair brush. I am fortunate that my hair is short and generally speaking, if it's been blow-dried into shape after I wash it, it will stay looking ok. I was all set.

So with much trepidation, on Monday morning I tried it for the first time. I was nervous navigating traffic and felt particularly awkward when I had to go on the pavement and there were pedestrians around, but I made it, with a good 10 minute break before work for me to cool down. Success!

Since then, I've had ups and downs. On the return journey, almost when I was home and puffing up the big hill we live on, I clunked it into an easier gear and the chain fell off and fell down a gap behind the cogs. I couldn't get it out, it was wedged. I was annoyed, but glad I wasn't far from home. Once I was back home David managed to retrieve the chain and advised me not to use the biggest cog on that side.

Tuesday morning was awful. The traffic scared me, I did not feel confident. I almost zoomed out in front of a car as I crossed a side road the car was turning into. I wobbled a lot. In the end, as I slowly moved off a kerb and across a road (because I was too scared to be part of the traffic when I got to a roundabout) my shoelace got caught in my pedals. I panicked and ended up falling flat on my arse with the bike clattering down next to me. Thankfully there was only one car driving slowly towards me so I wasn't in danger. I quickly hobbled out the road. I was shaken up but I wasn't far from work so pulled myself together and went to set off, only to find the chain had fallen off and into the gap again. I couldn't get it out, it was completely wedged. Now I was REALLY wound up and rang David for some ranting/moral support. I realised as I went to call him that it was 8.30 and I was supposed to be at my desk which only stressed me out more.

I pushed my bike up a hill and in a couple of streets I was at work where I got myself ready and was a few minutes late. I was so annoyed that, having finally overcome my fears to actually make the journey, I had experienced a fairly traumatic journey on only my second day.

With some considerable effort I managed to get the chain back on at lunch time and after work I cycled to kickboxing. I had already decided my heels could live at work since I never wear them at home so this freed up enough bag space for my kit (my gloves etc live at the club, it's just clothing really). I'm normally in a mad rush, dodging the chuggers on New Street as I dash from the Jewellery Quarter to Digbeth and I'm almost always late for my 5.30 class. On Tuesday I took my time getting ready and strolled in exactly on time. That was nice!

It was afterwards I hit a low point though. I jumped on my bike for my final journey home. By this point I was the same side of the city centre as where I lived so it seemed like it would be a nice quick journey and I was looking forward to getting back. As I set off I thought, "Wow something in this area smells bad".

A couple of minutes and several meters down the road I realised the smell was still there and was still very strong. The smell was travelling with me. It was the bike maybe. Horrifically, before I could think of any other reason, my brain jumped to the nasty conclusion someone must have pissed on my bike as it was locked to a lamp post outside my kickboxing club (for some context: very close to where this photo would have been taken).

I could have been wrong, and thankfully by the time I'd reached home and locked it to the staircase inside the building where I live, I could no longer detect the smell, but I was disgusted with how utterly vile some people could be. Another bad experience on only my second day of commuting by bike.

Well, that didn't put me off as such but I never intended for it to be a daily method of transport. I gave it a rest on Wednesday and it's not viable on Thursdays anyway because I go drinking after work. Today I got back on though and this morning things went well. I navigated roads more confidently. I'm learning my route better and making better decisions in traffic and on pavements. I arrived at work with 15 minutes to spare.

Despite my difficulties I'm actually feeling rather encouraged and I hope I'll keep it up when the weather turns colder, as I realise it's been fortunately mild this week. We've just had a sudden bout of heavy rain so I'm anticipating a wet bum on the way home but it's either that, or stand waiting anxiously for a bus that feels like it's never going to come to then sit chugging along in slow moving traffic, so I don't feel much worse off.

I don't know if it's something to do with the phases of the moon or (more probably) the clocks going back, but this week seems to have moved very slowly and I've felt so drained and groggy the whole time, almost like I'm jet lagged. Last night I almost stumbled home at 7pm after my kickboxing class (where I hadn't been pushing myself tbh), I was just wrecked with tiredness.

If it is the clocks, I do wish they wouldn't keep messing with them every six months for some antiquated reason that no one seems to adequately explain. Something to do with farmers?! Why? They are self employed and can start the day according to whenever it gets light! Cows can't tell the time! I don't mind whether we have light evenings or light mornings as long as I have the gradual progress of the seasons to get used to it and not a sudden unnatural jerk of one hour's difference.

Anyway, I did get plenty of sleep at the weekend but also managed to pack in a couple of fun days. Saturday lunch time we drove to Shrewsbury just for a wander round and because it's one of David's favourite places to visit. It's also not far from where my parents live, or at least, the same side of the Midlands, so after an afternoon of dipping in and out of charity shops and a pot of peppermint tea in a cafe, we headed to their place. They're getting a wall re-plastered in the living room so were limited to the conservatory and we all headed out for food and drinks in Shifnal's local pubs. It was a really good evening; I'm immensely pleased to see how happy and settled they both are in their new home and in the village itself.

The added bonus of going to visit the folks was that when I complained about my bike being nicked, my stepdad produced a bike belonging to my brother (that he almost certainly doesn't want any more), and after a quick puncture repair, I had a new bike to take home! Woo!

Well, now as for cycling, I have a story to tell. But I think it's going to be quite long so I may save it for a whole other entry.

On Sunday we went shopping and I think that was pretty much it. I enjoyed lazing around in the flat anyway! I've started playing on my PS3 again, picking up on an old game of Final Fantasy XIII that I hadn't touched in 18 months. I want to work a few minutes of gaming into my daily activities, I miss it. Then I might even play something newer!

For the first year that I can remember I haven't been out for Halloween and got all dressed up as something. I'm a little sad about that but also, frankly, I was running out of costume ideas, haha. Maybe next year we can have a Halloween party or something! On Monday night, Halloween itself, we were planning to go to an event at Martineau Gardens with ghost stories in the woods or something. I'm not sure why we didn't in the end, I think perhaps because it was raining and we couldn't figure out exactly what the event was about. Plus David really wanted to go and see something Halloween-themed at the cinema. We went to see Paranormal 3 which I did not enjoy at all. It reminded me of the Blair Witch Project - all shakey cameras and someone snivelling about seeing "something there". I just don't GET films like that, I find them boring and a little ridiculous. I tried to be open minded as I don't like to be set in my ways about anything but I just couldn't get into it.

The last couple of nights I've been kickboxing and suddenly it's Thursday! Woo! I'm still feeling tired and groggy - hopefully some drinks will help though, - and the weekend is at last in sight!

Awesome weekend!

The preceding week seemed to drag, despite my routine returning to a kind of normality with kickboxing and thurstails (we went to Slug & Lettuce and Strada). I'd also had some horrible luck with my bike being nicked sometime in the last week or so. It was locked up, but I had only used a chain lock and I'm kicking myself for not knowing better since all bikes that used a chain locked were stolen from the same courtyard just a few weeks ago. It wasn't worth a lot, and since we don't have insurance I haven't even bothered reporting it to the police, but I'm miffed. I've had that bike for about 10 years. I remember saving up for it and going to buy it from the Raleigh shop in Oxley in Wolverhampton. It's mine. I've also lost my only means of transport. I used to use it fairly often just to pop to the shops, which are a good 10 minute walk away. I will pick up a second hand one from somewhere but I'm rather annoyed that I have to :(

After all that, Friday night was very much welcome! After work I popped in a couple of shops in my search for a new bag. I was rather frustrated, couldn't find anything I really liked that much and felt guilty about spending money (despite that I really do need a bag, my old one broke). I almost bought a gaudy orange thing in Primark's sale as a stop-gap but wisely decided against it and headed home to enjoy my weekend.

We had a lovely thai curry with prawns and then had a bash at making Nigella Lawson's chocolate fudge cake. Mmmmmm! When the two halves came out they looked like two giant muffins. David wanted to eat it as soon as it came out of the oven. I feebly tried to suggest that it would be better when the cake cooled and firmed up, but we didn't have the patience for that ;) Thankfully it survived being dug into as soon as it was assembled. It is very nice! The icing is insanely sweet though. And I was right, it was even better a day or two later. It's also huge! After pigging out on it for a couple of days there's still half a cake left. So much for losing weight!

On Saturday we went to Dudley Zoo as they were running a 2 for 1 offer. We had a bit of drama because we realised almost as soon as we left home that we'd left the voucher pinned to the kitchen notice board. We pressed on, thinking we'd be able to bring the voucher up on my phone, but then it turned out it was only on facebook, on the left hand menu of Dudley Zoo's facebook page. My phone forces you to view facebook's mobile version and the left hand menu doesn't appear. Uh-oh. We went to Dudley Library where David has a membership, only to be told we couldn't use the computers til he paid the £17(!) fine he has outstanding on his account. Thankfully there was an internet cafe round the corner where logging on and printing a page was quick and painless - otherwise we would have had to give up and we would have driven to Dudley for nothing.

We'd already been to the zoo back in February and really enjoyed it. We met Jill the Raven and totally fell in love with her (see my video of it here) and we were looking forward to seeing her again more than anything else. Unfortunately she seemed to be in less of a good mood this time. She wasn't speaking, and although she was sociable and wanted to play with us - passing twigs back and forth between the bars - she was trying to trick us by getting us just close enough for her to nip at our fingers. Ouch! I suppose it didn't help that the zoo was much busier on this occasion so there were chavvy families screeching at her every five minutes.

Last time we'd been the resident tiger had recently died, but this time they had a new tiger, and a black bear. We were lucky the tiger was sunning itself in full view so we got to watch it for a few minutes. They're so beautiful! I'm always surprised how their movements such as cleaning their paws etc are identical to how domestic cats behave, they are so closely related. We got to see the sea lions being fed, which was great, and also stopped by the penguins who were funny as always. We unexpectedly made friends with some beautiful brown goats. They got added to the list of 'animals we'd have if we had a massive garden'.

One of Dudley Zoo's best features is the lemur woods. They have an enclosed area where the lemurs are free to jump around the trees freely and people can just walk through. They are completely unafraid of people and they're not interested in being petted but equally, are happy to jump around alongside you or walk past you on the hand rail as you're walking along the path. They are delightful! They move about so quickly that there seems to be loads of them, but I asked a keeper and there's actually only 22 lemurs in the whole area.

The lion enclosure was right next door. You could tell they were about to be fed as they were pacing around quickly and becoming more and more agitated. Two of them were almost dancing with each other in the way they were pacing back and forth around a small entrance to a caged area. I think they get put in a cage before their dinner is put into the open area and then they're released. We watched for a while but it was taking a long time so eventually we left to go and pursue our own dinner. As we were heading out of the zoo we heard a mighty roar from up the hill behind us - they had obviously finally been fed! I wish now we'd stopped to watch.

We stopped for some fish & chips in Black Heath. Orange chips, no less. Only the Midlands knows how to make proper chippy food. This is a fact backed up by our recent experience in Dorset, where we went to one place where a long line of locals were queueing up at their local chippy. We joined them only to be woefully disappointed when we were presented with a pitiful portion size and crap chips for an obscene price. I'd have blamed it on being a tourist trap if it wasn't for the queue of local people who obviously thought this pathetic offering was acceptable. Poor southerners don't know what they're missing out on.

After this we decided to visit Merry Hill. In the end, we didn't actually spend very long in there, and it was a casual saunter more than my usual determined shopping spree. I finally found a bag though, in Oasis, and decided just to get it there and then and worry about the cost later.
Friday is pay day, thankfully! Money's been a mess this month with repercussions of Prague, going to Blackpool, and a few unexpected bills. Things should hopefully settle down now and I'm determined not to overspend at Christmas. I've got to start thinking about ideas actually. I'm planning to make gingerbread houses like I did a couple of years ago. I'm wondering if I could sell them but I'm not confident they'll turn out well enough for that.

Sunday we went for a walk round Highbury Park, cleaned the flat a little, and then I hibernated under blankets and watched Downton Abbey, complete with successive cups of tea and lovely chocolate cake. Bliss! :)