This post was originally published 9 years ago, in June 2016; considering everything going on in the world these days, especially the turmoil here in the States, I felt it was important to pull it out of storage and re-share it here for Pride Month. I hope you like it.

The following poem was first published in the anthology Trigger Warning: Poetry Saved My Life (Swimming with Elephants Publications, 2014), and following its publication I shared it here on this blog. Even though I rarely re-post poems, I felt this would be appropriate in this case, in recognition of President Obama’s recent proclamation of June being Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month.
You see, about 25 years ago, a very close friend of mine went through an extremely difficult time in his life…and it nearly destroyed him. Fortunately, he found support from his friends and therapy from writing poetry:
Coming to Terms
He had to keep quiet.
No one could know of his love, no –
infatuation – for the tall, dark beauty
with whom he shared daily smiles. His thoughts
were his, yet quickly
he became their slave; not uncommon,
of course, as we all succumb
to that numbness, once, at least,
but for his own sake
he had to keep quiet.
None could know, not even
Dark Beauty, who
had no inkling of an unthinkable
courtship, but simply smiled back
as acquaintances do
until one day, in a burst of emotion and discovery,
every passionate detail of his desire
came pouring forth from every pore
in an unintended self-
immolation of love and pain.
The revelation
and cloud of rejection suffocated
and he wished it would
deaden the nerves that allowed him to feel
every word hurled
from Dark Beauty, friends,
parents, the world.
Endless days spent scared and crying
bled into pill-filled nights
that led not to quiet slumber but to weeks
and months
in the ward, safe and distressed. Alone
in his room, with pen
firm between heart and forefinger, line
by line he began to sort through love,
loss, dejection,
reflection
and the realization
he had been lying to himself, thinking
he had to keep quiet.
© 2014 Matt Forrest Esenwine, from Trigger Warning: Poetry Saved My Life (Swimming with Elephants Publications, 2014), all rights reserved
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You’ll find more poetry at There is no such thing as a God-forsaken town, where Ruth is holding down the offical Poetry Friday roundup with fireflies – LOTS of ’em!
~~ I am booking school visits for 2025-26! ~~
I love chatting with students about creativity, poetry, the writing process, dinsoaurs, and lots of other things! So if you think you might be interested in having me visit your school – either in-person or virtually – check out all the presentations I offer below, then email me at Matt (at) MattForrest (dot) com!









I love chatting with elementary and middle school classes about writing: why poetry is fun to read and write, the importance of revision, and how imagination and creativity can lead to fantastic careers! My presentations are tailored to fit the needs of the classes and students’ ages. One day I might be sharing details of how a picture book like Flashlight Night (Astra Young Readers, 2017) was created; the next, I’ll be discussing dinosaur breath or crafting origami sea turtles!
Student presentations include:
- The Making of a Picture Book
- How a Child Saved a Book
- “Once Upon Another Time”
- The Most Important Thing about Writing Poetry
- “I Am Today”
- “A Beginner’s Guide to Being Human”
- “Everybody Counts: Counting to 10 in Twelve Languages”
- The Making of a Picture Book
- The Most Important Thing about Writing Poetry
- Free Yourself with Free Verse
- Tight Language, Loose Narratives: Crafting a Non-Traditional Picture Book
- The Journey of a Children’s Author
Learn more at MattForrest.com!
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Ordering personalized signed copies online? Oh, yes, you can!
You can purchase personally-signed copies of Flashlight Night, (Astra Young Readers, 2017), Don’t Ask a Dinosaur (Pow! Kids Books, 2018), and nearly EVERY book or anthology I’ve been part of!
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Just click the cover of whichever book you want and send a comment to the good folks at MainStreet BookEnds in Warner, NH requesting my signature and to whom I should make it out. (alternatively, you can log onto my website and do the same thing) They’ll contact me, I’ll stop by and sign it, and then they’ll ship it! (Plus, you’ll be supporting your local bookseller – and won’t that make you feel good?)
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