love and drugs and my own life I saved for My own damn good!

My journey through hell and back. Child abuse, neglect and the mental issues that will follow until death or treating all those wounds, badly developed ways of living, loving, learning, killing ones mind, body, soul and loved ones to come and go like the wind blows and your heart stops or something says, Go to get Help and you say, I need it and my last life is not as bad as it has to seem to those I truly loved like anyone does if not mentally well to know, that love was never good enough to die when it was over on my head! My fault, my sickness, my anger and I'll will! Not Anymore! It's too late to say I'm going to get myself out of hell without asking God to save me or I'll burn to my last breath. In hell, not ok!